WEBVTT FILE 1 00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:15.000 Created and Encoded by -- Bokutox -- of www.YIFY-TORRENTS.com. The Best 720p/1080p/3d movies with the lowest file size on the internet. 2 00:01:29.004 --> 00:01:33.634 Dude, dude, no, I was, like, "Yes, we do have nuclear missiles." 3 00:01:33.717 --> 00:01:35.427 And he was all, like, "No, you don't." 4 00:01:35.469 --> 00:01:38.389 And I was all, like, "Yes, we do. Whatever." 5 00:01:38.472 --> 00:01:41.809 And then I was, like, "Well, what part of 'whatever' 6 00:01:41.850 --> 00:01:43.435 "do you not get?" 7 00:02:17.636 --> 00:02:20.139 Josh? Josh? 8 00:02:25.269 --> 00:02:29.022 Hey! How many times have I told you kids not to play ball in this alley? 9 00:02:29.064 --> 00:02:30.816 - Mom! - Are you all right? 10 00:02:30.858 --> 00:02:34.486 I'm fine. It wasn't a baseball. There was this thing! 11 00:02:34.611 --> 00:02:37.448 It came from space! It almost hit me! 12 00:02:37.489 --> 00:02:40.075 - A thing came from space? - Yeah. 13 00:02:41.201 --> 00:02:44.538 You have the biggest imagination, mister. 14 00:02:44.580 --> 00:02:46.081 - But... - Come here. 15 00:02:46.165 --> 00:02:47.541 - I'm glad you're all right. - But... 16 00:02:47.583 --> 00:02:49.543 No buts. It's time to get ready for bed, please. 17 00:02:49.626 --> 00:02:53.672 Here. And don't walk over there until I pick up that glass, okay? 18 00:02:58.302 --> 00:02:59.720 Awesome. 19 00:04:58.632 --> 00:05:00.009 Knox. Dooley. 20 00:05:00.092 --> 00:05:03.387 Got a report on some kind of fireball or something like that 21 00:05:03.429 --> 00:05:06.223 over on Liberty Island. Check it out. 22 00:05:06.307 --> 00:05:09.185 No way. A fireball. Cool. We'll get right on it. 23 00:05:09.268 --> 00:05:10.728 Sarge, can't you get somebody else to handle it? 24 00:05:10.728 --> 00:05:15.191 - Come on, we just pulled an all-nighter. - I'm so sorry, Mr. Knox. Tell you what. 25 00:05:15.274 --> 00:05:18.110 Lay down in my office, and then I'll come by with your blankie, 26 00:05:18.194 --> 00:05:20.446 and you can get yourself a nice nap. 27 00:05:20.529 --> 00:05:23.741 Come on, it's gonna be great. A fireball? How often do we get a call like that? 28 00:05:23.824 --> 00:05:27.578 Do me a favor, okay? Act like a cop and stop caring. 29 00:06:19.755 --> 00:06:21.924 Oh, my God. 30 00:06:22.591 --> 00:06:25.845 Oh, my God. Oh, my God, are you all right? 31 00:06:25.928 --> 00:06:28.347 Hello? Please don't be dead! 32 00:06:28.431 --> 00:06:30.266 Oh, did you see that? He came out of nowhere! 33 00:06:30.349 --> 00:06:32.727 It kind of looked like you sped up to hit him. 34 00:06:32.769 --> 00:06:35.564 I was going for the parking spot! Oh, my God. 35 00:06:35.647 --> 00:06:37.190 Oh, Jesus! 36 00:06:39.359 --> 00:06:40.944 Are you all right? 37 00:06:41.069 --> 00:06:44.156 Are you okay? Hello? Please say something. 38 00:06:45.282 --> 00:06:49.036 Oh, my God, his foot! I'll call an ambulance! 39 00:06:49.077 --> 00:06:51.413 Oh, God. Please stay alive, please stay alive, 40 00:06:51.496 --> 00:06:55.751 please stay alive, please stay alive. This is such bad karma from... 41 00:06:58.962 --> 00:07:00.964 - Where did he go? - I don't know. 42 00:07:01.798 --> 00:07:03.300 Mr. Guy? 43 00:08:00.982 --> 00:08:03.693 - This will take some time. - Copy that. 44 00:08:15.998 --> 00:08:17.458 All clear. 45 00:08:32.056 --> 00:08:34.058 Repairs underway, sir. 46 00:08:35.893 --> 00:08:37.395 Damage report. 47 00:08:49.699 --> 00:08:51.868 Right Arm, all well. 48 00:08:51.909 --> 00:08:53.619 Left Arm, ready. 49 00:08:57.415 --> 00:08:59.876 - Casualties, Doctor? - Abrasions, contusions. 50 00:08:59.917 --> 00:09:02.128 Nothing significant, Captain. 51 00:09:04.714 --> 00:09:06.174 Engineering? 52 00:09:06.924 --> 00:09:08.718 Running diagnostics, sir. 53 00:09:10.928 --> 00:09:13.056 Lieutenant Buttocks, what is your status? 54 00:09:13.973 --> 00:09:17.393 Captain, we had a small gas leak. It was silent, but not deadly. 55 00:09:22.815 --> 00:09:26.527 Well, crew, it seems our ship has survived the impact. 56 00:09:26.611 --> 00:09:30.156 Actually, diagnostics are not encouraging, Captain. 57 00:09:30.239 --> 00:09:33.534 This collision was unexpected, so our impact shields weren't activated. 58 00:09:33.618 --> 00:09:36.371 How long can we operate at full capacity? 59 00:09:36.454 --> 00:09:40.750 Forty-eight Earth hours at most. After that, system functions will fail. 60 00:09:40.792 --> 00:09:43.836 - And our tracking computer? - Down, sir. 61 00:09:43.878 --> 00:09:46.631 That means we only have the last known coordinates of the orb. 62 00:09:46.714 --> 00:09:51.094 It can be anywhere within 10,000 square meters of our current location. 63 00:09:51.761 --> 00:09:53.513 No. 2, Options? 64 00:09:54.639 --> 00:09:57.642 We could continue on the mission, sir, but it's extremely risky. 65 00:09:57.726 --> 00:10:00.312 The prudent course would be to return to our home planet, Nil, 66 00:10:00.396 --> 00:10:02.231 and repair the ship. 67 00:10:06.443 --> 00:10:08.237 Assemble the crew. 68 00:10:09.071 --> 00:10:13.409 Ladies and gentlemen, prepare for an address by your esteemed captain! 69 00:10:16.578 --> 00:10:19.790 This is it. 70 00:10:19.832 --> 00:10:23.043 This is the moment that we've all been training for. 71 00:10:23.085 --> 00:10:25.003 We all know what's at stake. 72 00:10:25.129 --> 00:10:29.258 Our planet is on the verge of a catastrophic energy crisis. 73 00:10:29.341 --> 00:10:31.218 The device we sent to this world to drain its oceans 74 00:10:31.301 --> 00:10:35.723 has been knocked off course and is lost somewhere in this city. 75 00:10:35.806 --> 00:10:39.768 Once it is found and deployed, the salt from this world 76 00:10:39.852 --> 00:10:42.813 shall power our home world for ages to come. 77 00:10:43.605 --> 00:10:49.319 Without it, our people will perish in less than one generation. 78 00:10:49.361 --> 00:10:51.864 I will not permit that to happen. 79 00:10:53.198 --> 00:10:54.825 We must succeed. 80 00:10:58.037 --> 00:10:59.705 - For Nil. - For Nil. 81 00:10:59.788 --> 00:11:01.582 - For Nil. - For Nil. 82 00:11:02.207 --> 00:11:04.043 Back to your posts. 83 00:11:05.044 --> 00:11:06.587 No. 3. 84 00:11:06.628 --> 00:11:08.338 Do we have sufficient linguistic information 85 00:11:08.338 --> 00:11:09.715 to help communicate with these natives? 86 00:11:09.798 --> 00:11:13.343 Yes. I tapped into their central planetary databank, named "Google." 87 00:11:13.427 --> 00:11:15.512 What a frivolous name for such a vital function. 88 00:11:15.554 --> 00:11:18.891 Well, if you prefer, there's another called "Yahoo!" 89 00:11:18.974 --> 00:11:20.809 Baffling. 90 00:11:20.851 --> 00:11:22.811 - What about... - Cultural and historical references? 91 00:11:22.895 --> 00:11:25.731 - Already on it, Captain. - Good. 92 00:11:25.814 --> 00:11:29.359 - No. 4, is security prepared? - Yes, sir. 93 00:11:29.401 --> 00:11:32.738 My team can handle any threat posed by these gargantuan savages. 94 00:11:32.821 --> 00:11:34.865 - Good. - Initial reports confirm 95 00:11:34.990 --> 00:11:36.116 that draining this planet's oceans 96 00:11:36.200 --> 00:11:39.495 would have a catastrophic effect on existing life. 97 00:11:39.579 --> 00:11:44.084 We have orders, No. 3. Our entire home world is depending on us. 98 00:11:44.167 --> 00:11:45.919 Agreed. 99 00:11:45.919 --> 00:11:49.255 We should not lament the fates of these inferior creatures. 100 00:11:49.339 --> 00:11:51.257 If the orb has fallen into their hands, 101 00:11:51.341 --> 00:11:55.053 who knows for what nefarious purpose they could be using it 102 00:11:55.095 --> 00:11:56.888 at this very moment? 103 00:12:13.696 --> 00:12:16.616 Mom, there's a drunk guy in the alley again! 104 00:12:18.535 --> 00:12:19.911 - That's him. - Who? 105 00:12:19.953 --> 00:12:22.747 - The guy I just hit with my car. - You're kidding. Again? 106 00:12:22.789 --> 00:12:25.291 Oh, I barely clipped that other guy. 107 00:12:25.333 --> 00:12:27.085 Sir, coronal gas readings just spiked. 108 00:12:27.127 --> 00:12:29.713 - The orb must be nearby. - Hello? 109 00:12:29.754 --> 00:12:33.258 Hello, sir, hi. Hello? Hi, there. 110 00:12:33.383 --> 00:12:36.886 - Hello, sir? Hi, are you all right? - Contact, everyone! 111 00:12:36.970 --> 00:12:38.972 - Because you just ran off. - No. 17. 112 00:12:39.055 --> 00:12:40.223 - Return to the ship. - Copy. 113 00:12:40.306 --> 00:12:44.102 I'm worried. I really feel terrible about what just happened. 114 00:12:44.144 --> 00:12:45.812 Can I call you an ambulance or something? 115 00:12:45.895 --> 00:12:48.815 Any medical attention for... For your foot? 116 00:12:51.776 --> 00:12:53.236 Your foot. 117 00:12:53.319 --> 00:12:55.822 Our first verbal encounter. 118 00:12:57.115 --> 00:12:58.533 Thank you for your concern. 119 00:12:58.616 --> 00:13:00.744 Thank you for your concern. 120 00:13:01.578 --> 00:13:04.247 It's way too high. More bass! 121 00:13:04.873 --> 00:13:06.708 Thank you for your concern. 122 00:13:06.791 --> 00:13:08.293 Level the frequency. 123 00:13:09.210 --> 00:13:11.129 I'm all better now. 124 00:13:12.088 --> 00:13:14.382 How hard did you hit this guy? 125 00:13:16.217 --> 00:13:18.928 It's time for you to go to school before you're late, okay? 126 00:13:18.971 --> 00:13:20.056 Mom... 127 00:13:20.139 --> 00:13:23.559 See how she squeezes the smaller one's skull despite his protests. 128 00:13:23.642 --> 00:13:26.479 - Stop! Stop! - Such brutality! 129 00:13:26.520 --> 00:13:28.481 - Go on. Goodbye. - Stop! 130 00:13:28.522 --> 00:13:30.816 Hey, safety first. And if those boys are after you, you tell me! 131 00:13:30.900 --> 00:13:33.986 - I'm calling their parents. - Okay. 132 00:13:34.028 --> 00:13:37.156 Would you like to come upstairs for a glass of water, maybe? Anything? 133 00:13:37.239 --> 00:13:39.241 I can help clean you up. 134 00:13:39.325 --> 00:13:41.118 No, thank you. I am fine. 135 00:13:41.202 --> 00:13:42.870 I am in position. 136 00:13:43.662 --> 00:13:45.164 Are you sure? 137 00:13:46.457 --> 00:13:48.918 Okay, but, see, that's not fine. 138 00:13:48.959 --> 00:13:51.879 So, maybe you should come upstairs, or I can call an ambulance. 139 00:13:51.921 --> 00:13:54.548 Sir, we cannot let her contact the authorities. 140 00:13:54.632 --> 00:13:58.427 Agreed. We will go in long enough to put her mind at ease. 141 00:13:58.511 --> 00:14:02.181 Yes, I will accompany you. Thank you for your hospitality. 142 00:14:02.515 --> 00:14:04.016 Good. 143 00:14:06.602 --> 00:14:08.562 The thing about my car is, you gotta pump the brakes. 144 00:14:08.604 --> 00:14:09.897 I mean, I just got it back from the shop, 145 00:14:09.980 --> 00:14:11.774 and I'm seriously considering suing my mechanic, 146 00:14:11.857 --> 00:14:13.776 because that was just crazy about what happened. 147 00:14:13.859 --> 00:14:15.528 Oh, sorry, right here! Oh, sorry, right here. 148 00:14:17.405 --> 00:14:19.490 - Hey. - Hey! 149 00:14:19.573 --> 00:14:20.866 - How you doing? - How are you? 150 00:14:20.908 --> 00:14:23.452 Good. Good timing. I got something for you. 151 00:14:23.536 --> 00:14:25.788 Three tubes of cerulean blue. 152 00:14:25.871 --> 00:14:29.333 - I just ran out. - Hi. Mark Rhodes. 153 00:14:29.417 --> 00:14:32.336 Why does he thrust his arm towards us? 154 00:14:32.420 --> 00:14:34.672 Probably best to imitate him. 155 00:14:35.464 --> 00:14:37.133 Hi. Mark Rhodes. 156 00:14:40.886 --> 00:14:42.513 Lefty, huh? Hey. 157 00:14:51.021 --> 00:14:52.940 - All right. - All right. 158 00:14:54.066 --> 00:14:55.526 Okay. 159 00:14:57.570 --> 00:14:59.447 - All right. - All right. 160 00:15:02.451 --> 00:15:03.910 Okay. 161 00:15:06.955 --> 00:15:08.415 - Thanks again. - Yeah. 162 00:15:08.457 --> 00:15:10.625 - We're going right inside. - All right, yeah. 163 00:15:26.058 --> 00:15:28.101 Okay, here you go. 164 00:15:28.185 --> 00:15:30.103 Sorry about the mess. 165 00:15:30.187 --> 00:15:36.151 You know, this is sort of a workspace/home combo thingy, thing. 166 00:15:42.908 --> 00:15:45.452 Right Arm. This is unacceptable. 167 00:15:45.494 --> 00:15:48.497 Sorry! The liquid shifts the equilibrium! 168 00:15:51.625 --> 00:15:54.753 - I still seem to be a bit shaken up. - Oh, crap. 169 00:16:10.644 --> 00:16:14.439 - There, I feel much better now. - Oh, good! That is great. 170 00:16:14.523 --> 00:16:15.482 Great news. Good. 171 00:16:15.565 --> 00:16:18.318 So then, you don't need to call your lawyer, or anything crazy like that, 172 00:16:18.443 --> 00:16:21.655 because that would be just pointless, wouldn't it? 173 00:16:21.696 --> 00:16:24.282 Good. Oh, I'm Gina, by the way. 174 00:16:26.368 --> 00:16:27.994 Gina Morrison. 175 00:16:28.995 --> 00:16:30.455 And you are? 176 00:16:32.207 --> 00:16:33.750 Three? 177 00:16:33.834 --> 00:16:37.129 This is a list of the most common names on this planet. 178 00:16:37.212 --> 00:16:38.880 My name is... 179 00:16:39.924 --> 00:16:42.635 - Ming Chang. - Ming Chang? 180 00:16:43.469 --> 00:16:47.974 Sorry. Sorry, you just struck me more like a Dave, or something. 181 00:16:48.057 --> 00:16:50.685 Which happens to be my other name. 182 00:16:50.727 --> 00:16:53.187 Dave Ming Chang? 183 00:16:54.230 --> 00:16:56.023 Dave Ming Chang. 184 00:16:56.149 --> 00:17:00.069 Dave Ming Chang. All right, well, Dave, 185 00:17:00.194 --> 00:17:04.240 I feel just terrible about this whole thing, and I was gonna have some breakfast. 186 00:17:04.323 --> 00:17:05.575 Would you like to join me? 187 00:17:05.658 --> 00:17:08.578 - No, I really have to be going now. - Are you sure? 188 00:17:08.619 --> 00:17:12.081 I mean, I sort of have a rule that, when I hit somebody with my car, 189 00:17:12.206 --> 00:17:14.500 I need to make them breakfast. 190 00:17:17.378 --> 00:17:19.005 That was a joke. 191 00:17:29.599 --> 00:17:32.101 So where are you from? Do you live around here? 192 00:17:32.143 --> 00:17:35.271 Yes, of course. I am just a regular person from right here on Earth, 193 00:17:35.354 --> 00:17:36.939 just like you. 194 00:17:38.107 --> 00:17:39.609 I just don't get out that much. 195 00:17:39.692 --> 00:17:43.404 Yeah, judging from your suit, I'd say since about 1978. 196 00:17:44.655 --> 00:17:48.242 Note, all-white apparel is not as standardized as we thought. 197 00:17:48.326 --> 00:17:50.578 You late for a Bee Gees concert or something? 198 00:17:50.661 --> 00:17:53.956 The Bee Gees. Barry, Robin and Maurice, the Brothers Gibb. 199 00:17:54.040 --> 00:17:57.418 Winning ten Grammy awards and selling over 100,000,000 records. 200 00:17:57.502 --> 00:17:59.670 Oh, you can tell by the way I use my walk 201 00:17:59.754 --> 00:18:01.881 I'm a woman's man No time to talk 202 00:18:03.800 --> 00:18:05.343 Stayin' alive 203 00:18:07.804 --> 00:18:10.932 Wow. That's impressive love for the Bee Gees, man. 204 00:18:10.973 --> 00:18:13.643 I'm sorry, I had no idea. You know? Foot in the mouth. 205 00:18:13.726 --> 00:18:16.270 Listen, do you mind whipping these up for me? 206 00:18:16.312 --> 00:18:18.022 That would be so great. Just a little help. 207 00:18:18.106 --> 00:18:21.526 I'm so used to making breakfast for Josh, and all he wants is waffles. 208 00:18:21.652 --> 00:18:23.404 Anyway, he's off to school now. 209 00:18:23.445 --> 00:18:25.864 Yeah, I don't know, he's got these bullies after him right now. 210 00:18:25.948 --> 00:18:26.990 You don't have any kids, do you? 211 00:18:27.074 --> 00:18:29.284 I mean, you don't really seem like a kid person, but... 212 00:18:29.368 --> 00:18:31.870 Anyway, I just, I try to be there for him, 213 00:18:31.954 --> 00:18:33.747 but I don't really know how to deal with it, you know. 214 00:18:33.789 --> 00:18:38.043 I'm just doing the single mom thing, and I'm so permissive of everything. 215 00:18:38.127 --> 00:18:40.879 Oh, my God, I am talking your ear off. 216 00:18:43.549 --> 00:18:47.010 - All is well. - Okay, why don't you just take a seat? 217 00:18:47.094 --> 00:18:49.555 And I can finish this. 218 00:18:49.638 --> 00:18:51.473 Here, you like ketchup? 219 00:18:51.515 --> 00:18:53.892 - Oh, thank you. - You're welcome. 220 00:19:05.154 --> 00:19:07.823 Refreshing. I feel much better now. 221 00:19:11.535 --> 00:19:13.203 That's a new one. 222 00:19:17.166 --> 00:19:20.335 Oh, that's our cat, Boris. I hope you're not allergic. 223 00:19:20.419 --> 00:19:22.171 Are you? 224 00:19:22.254 --> 00:19:24.173 Cats. Here we go, sir. 225 00:19:32.473 --> 00:19:34.516 Boris, what are you up to? 226 00:19:37.895 --> 00:19:39.563 - Captain. - Yes? 227 00:19:39.646 --> 00:19:42.733 Yes, my husband was a captain with the Navy. 228 00:19:43.859 --> 00:19:47.154 - I am a captain. - Really? A captain of what? 229 00:19:49.573 --> 00:19:51.658 I am a captain of crunch. 230 00:19:53.869 --> 00:19:58.248 - Where is your captain now? - Frank died four years ago, 231 00:19:58.374 --> 00:20:00.626 so it's just me and Josh now. 232 00:20:01.210 --> 00:20:04.421 It's been rough sometimes, but we're okay. 233 00:20:04.547 --> 00:20:06.883 There is a strength to this one. 234 00:20:07.842 --> 00:20:09.511 Captain, the orb! 235 00:20:18.395 --> 00:20:19.896 Where was this image captured? 236 00:20:19.979 --> 00:20:24.150 That's Josh at school, the science fair. He always walks around with this thing. 237 00:20:24.192 --> 00:20:27.237 See, he thinks it fell from outer space. 238 00:20:27.278 --> 00:20:30.365 - We must locate the boy. - We're on it, sir. 239 00:20:30.407 --> 00:20:32.242 729 East 44th Street. 240 00:20:33.368 --> 00:20:36.121 I really have to be going now. Thank you for the ketchup. 241 00:20:36.955 --> 00:20:40.959 Okay. You know, the eggs are just another... 242 00:20:41.918 --> 00:20:45.630 That's the closet. 243 00:20:51.177 --> 00:20:53.596 Sorry about hitting you with my car. 244 00:20:54.222 --> 00:20:57.517 A couple of frat punks get drunk, miss the last ferry, 245 00:20:57.559 --> 00:21:00.770 stick a rag in their bottle of Stoli, and then, kaboom! 246 00:21:00.812 --> 00:21:04.107 Suddenly, my morning roll in the hay with Tracy gets canceled. 247 00:21:04.149 --> 00:21:06.735 I think this is explosive residue. 248 00:21:08.695 --> 00:21:13.199 Don't. Don't do this, Dooley. I see you getting interested in this. 249 00:21:13.283 --> 00:21:16.244 I see that wacko X Files gleam in your eye. 250 00:21:27.672 --> 00:21:31.342 That might be the boy, there! In that group of Earth children. 251 00:21:31.426 --> 00:21:32.427 What structure is this? 252 00:21:32.510 --> 00:21:35.764 It appears to be some sort of shrine to technology. 253 00:21:43.773 --> 00:21:48.736 This is the best they have to offer? Their mini-computers are gigantic! 254 00:21:48.819 --> 00:21:52.782 And a slamming home page means more online buddies. 255 00:21:52.823 --> 00:21:55.659 Dude, while you're waiting, check these out. 256 00:21:55.743 --> 00:22:00.831 Awesome surround-sound headphones. Seven ounces, left and right quad. 257 00:22:00.873 --> 00:22:03.167 The sound will blow you away. 258 00:22:05.711 --> 00:22:06.837 Is that insane? 259 00:22:06.879 --> 00:22:09.799 It's like the subwoofers are actually inside your head. 260 00:22:12.426 --> 00:22:15.012 Damage reports coming in from all parts of the ship, Captain! 261 00:22:15.054 --> 00:22:17.681 Sir! Structural integrity weakening! 262 00:22:25.314 --> 00:22:27.149 We have got to get out of here! 263 00:22:38.661 --> 00:22:41.872 The sign clearly indicates, "Do not walk." 264 00:22:41.956 --> 00:22:47.128 And yet, they keep walking and walking and walking! 265 00:22:48.129 --> 00:22:51.590 Apparently, chaos is the order of the day here. 266 00:22:51.674 --> 00:22:53.134 Doctor, 267 00:22:54.760 --> 00:22:56.429 is Two all right? 268 00:22:57.596 --> 00:22:58.889 This is a big planet. 269 00:22:58.931 --> 00:23:03.144 There might be contaminants we've never encountered before. 270 00:23:03.227 --> 00:23:04.353 I'll keep an eye on it. 271 00:23:33.925 --> 00:23:37.012 Why don't you take a picture? It lasts longer. 272 00:23:42.184 --> 00:23:43.769 It's the ice cream man! 273 00:23:43.852 --> 00:23:45.604 Ice cream man, over here! 274 00:23:45.645 --> 00:23:48.940 - Ice cream! - Hey, look, it's the Good Humor man! 275 00:23:51.485 --> 00:23:53.111 It's this suit again! 276 00:23:53.195 --> 00:23:55.238 How in Nil did we wind up with this wardrobe debacle? 277 00:23:55.322 --> 00:23:58.450 - We must have missed something. - I can't see how, sir. 278 00:23:58.533 --> 00:24:01.828 We carefully studied the only signal ever intercepted from Earth. 279 00:24:02.245 --> 00:24:04.706 The plane! The plane! 280 00:24:07.292 --> 00:24:08.460 When we enter the boy's school, 281 00:24:08.502 --> 00:24:11.421 we must not draw any undue attention to ourselves. 282 00:24:11.463 --> 00:24:14.883 Yes, we must rid ourselves of this inappropriate attire 283 00:24:15.008 --> 00:24:19.679 and replace it with clothing that is the epitome of both hip and now. 284 00:24:19.763 --> 00:24:21.556 Welcome to Old Navy! 285 00:24:25.227 --> 00:24:28.313 - Any ideas? - Likely a ritual greeting, sir. 286 00:24:28.397 --> 00:24:29.940 Welcome to Old Navy! 287 00:24:31.191 --> 00:24:34.528 - Welcome to Old Navy! - Welcome to Old Navy! 288 00:24:34.611 --> 00:24:36.446 Welcome to Old Navy! 289 00:24:36.488 --> 00:24:38.073 Welcome to Old Navy! 290 00:24:38.156 --> 00:24:40.909 Welcome to Old Navy. 291 00:24:44.371 --> 00:24:46.164 Welcome to Old Navy! 292 00:24:49.918 --> 00:24:52.003 Welcome to Old Navy. 293 00:24:53.422 --> 00:24:55.632 Can I help you find your size? 294 00:24:56.883 --> 00:24:59.845 I am obviously the same size as everyone else. 295 00:24:59.928 --> 00:25:02.514 I just meant are you a small, or... 296 00:25:08.438 --> 00:25:11.524 I believe he simply wants to know the dimensions of your clothing. 297 00:25:12.692 --> 00:25:15.862 Yes, you can help me find my size. 298 00:25:15.945 --> 00:25:17.780 Welcome to Old Navy. 299 00:25:20.158 --> 00:25:22.994 Crew, prepare for an unrehearsed maneuver. 300 00:25:31.461 --> 00:25:32.920 Come on! 301 00:25:33.838 --> 00:25:36.841 - What the... - Sorry, sir! It won't happen again! 302 00:25:40.636 --> 00:25:44.724 I can help you if you'd... How about I help you take that. 303 00:25:45.266 --> 00:25:47.101 Very... 304 00:25:47.185 --> 00:25:50.313 Yes, this is my size. Welcome to Old Navy! 305 00:25:55.526 --> 00:26:00.156 Excuse me. Do you have a private chamber where I can try on these garments? 306 00:26:00.239 --> 00:26:02.867 Changing room back there behind hoodies. 307 00:26:02.992 --> 00:26:04.410 Welcome to Old Navy. 308 00:26:29.519 --> 00:26:32.105 Sir, we have arrived at the school. 309 00:26:34.190 --> 00:26:35.274 This can't be right. 310 00:26:35.358 --> 00:26:42.115 One singular sensation Every little step she takes 311 00:26:43.116 --> 00:26:44.742 Apologies, sir. 312 00:26:44.826 --> 00:26:47.203 Apparently we are on West 44th Street. 313 00:26:49.498 --> 00:26:55.295 One smile and suddenly nobody else will do 314 00:26:59.091 --> 00:27:01.635 Let's get out of here. Double-time. 315 00:27:13.897 --> 00:27:16.066 - Hey! - What do you got here, little freak? 316 00:27:16.150 --> 00:27:20.571 - That's mine! - What do you use it for, playing nerd-ball? 317 00:27:20.654 --> 00:27:23.615 - Whatever it is, it's mine now. - Give it back! 318 00:27:23.699 --> 00:27:26.160 Or what? You gonna tell your mommy again? 319 00:27:26.869 --> 00:27:28.162 Can I help you? 320 00:27:28.245 --> 00:27:30.748 I am here for the fifth-grade classroom. 321 00:27:30.831 --> 00:27:33.333 Okay, all right, you're very late, but you're here, at least. 322 00:27:33.417 --> 00:27:36.837 It's been a madhouse. Half the teachers are out with the flu. 323 00:27:36.879 --> 00:27:39.840 I'm just gonna... I'm gonna have to throw you to the wolves. 324 00:27:45.888 --> 00:27:48.474 Don't say a word. I will mess you up. 325 00:27:50.267 --> 00:27:52.144 Josh Morrison. 326 00:27:52.227 --> 00:27:54.646 What are you doing here? Are you the sub? 327 00:27:54.730 --> 00:27:57.107 You would know the sub, loser! 328 00:27:58.650 --> 00:28:01.445 I don't know him! My mom hit him with her van! 329 00:28:01.528 --> 00:28:04.364 I am Dave Ming Chang, the sub. 330 00:28:09.703 --> 00:28:11.038 What is your name? 331 00:28:11.080 --> 00:28:14.083 - Smellmy. - Smellmy what? 332 00:28:14.124 --> 00:28:15.876 Smellmy Buttcrack. 333 00:28:17.461 --> 00:28:20.589 I am sure the other Buttcracks would disapprove of your behavior. 334 00:28:20.631 --> 00:28:22.925 You don't look like a teacher. 335 00:28:23.801 --> 00:28:25.803 I'm going to report you. 336 00:28:25.886 --> 00:28:29.890 - Vaporize the child at once! - Delay that order. 337 00:28:29.933 --> 00:28:35.397 I am indeed your temporary instructor, which I shall prove to you now. Observe. 338 00:28:35.480 --> 00:28:38.400 Let's teach them something simple, shall we? 339 00:28:51.621 --> 00:28:53.081 What the... 340 00:28:59.087 --> 00:29:04.050 The unified field theory. The ultimate pearl of wisdom in all of the universe. 341 00:29:04.175 --> 00:29:06.010 Now you are educated. 342 00:29:06.636 --> 00:29:09.472 - What is your destination? - I'm gonna sharpen my pencil. 343 00:29:09.514 --> 00:29:11.474 Here, let me assist you. 344 00:29:17.230 --> 00:29:20.483 - There. - Thanks, I think. 345 00:29:21.860 --> 00:29:24.654 Josh Morrison. Come with me. 346 00:29:26.489 --> 00:29:30.452 What are you doing here? You're not really the sub, are you? 347 00:29:31.536 --> 00:29:33.079 You have something that is mine. 348 00:29:33.163 --> 00:29:38.084 It is a small spherical device, 2.7 inches in diameter. 349 00:29:38.168 --> 00:29:39.836 How'd you hear about that? 350 00:29:39.878 --> 00:29:43.465 And how can it be yours if it came from outer space? 351 00:29:43.548 --> 00:29:45.800 Are you an alien? 352 00:29:45.842 --> 00:29:47.719 We've been compromised! 353 00:29:47.802 --> 00:29:49.888 I'm just messing with you. 354 00:29:52.182 --> 00:29:54.934 That's very funny. It's very important that I find it. 355 00:29:55.018 --> 00:29:57.020 Do you know where it is? 356 00:29:57.729 --> 00:30:01.441 Let me guess. It's, like, top secret or something. 357 00:30:01.524 --> 00:30:04.486 Yes. It is top secret or something. 358 00:30:04.527 --> 00:30:08.740 Will you help us, I mean me, find it? 359 00:30:09.784 --> 00:30:13.204 Look, I don't have it anymore. This jerk took it. 360 00:30:14.705 --> 00:30:16.374 Well, we have to get it back. 361 00:30:16.457 --> 00:30:18.709 - Where is this jerk? - His name is Rich. 362 00:30:18.793 --> 00:30:21.295 Him and his buddies are probably headed for the deli. 363 00:30:21.379 --> 00:30:24.173 - Lead and I will follow. - Okay, come on. 364 00:30:39.522 --> 00:30:41.440 Such disturbing images. 365 00:30:43.484 --> 00:30:47.029 - Rich isn't here. - Do you know where Rich lives? 366 00:30:47.113 --> 00:30:49.949 No, but sometimes I run into him in the neighborhood. 367 00:30:50.074 --> 00:30:52.159 Everybody on the floor, now! 368 00:30:52.243 --> 00:30:55.037 Empty the register and no one gets hurt. 369 00:30:56.247 --> 00:31:00.126 This planet continues to reveal its ugly nature. 370 00:31:00.167 --> 00:31:01.919 It deserves its fate. 371 00:31:02.002 --> 00:31:06.090 - I said, on the floor, now! - I am already on the floor. 372 00:31:06.173 --> 00:31:09.176 Gravity prevents me from floating off of it. 373 00:31:09.927 --> 00:31:11.637 Get down now! 374 00:31:17.935 --> 00:31:19.729 Big mistake, man. 375 00:31:29.905 --> 00:31:32.491 Hey, you have forgotten your weapon! 376 00:31:33.451 --> 00:31:35.453 Dave, wait! 377 00:31:35.494 --> 00:31:39.874 That was awesome! I mean, you totally threw that guy across the room. 378 00:31:39.957 --> 00:31:42.752 I was very fortunate not to be injured. 379 00:31:42.793 --> 00:31:46.714 And the gun. No normal person could have done that. 380 00:31:46.797 --> 00:31:49.300 Do you have, like, superpowers or something? 381 00:31:49.383 --> 00:31:50.760 Do you know what would be very pleasant? 382 00:31:50.844 --> 00:31:53.680 If we were to change the subject of our conversation. 383 00:31:53.764 --> 00:31:56.183 Did you see last night's sports competition? 384 00:31:56.308 --> 00:32:00.103 You see? There's another thing. You talk so weird. 385 00:32:00.145 --> 00:32:02.981 - Come on, tell me, what's your secret? - I have no secret. 386 00:32:03.065 --> 00:32:07.069 - Oh, yeah? Quick, where are you from? - I am from right here in this city. 387 00:32:07.110 --> 00:32:09.780 Where exactly? Give me an address. 388 00:32:11.656 --> 00:32:13.200 The Statue of Liberty. 389 00:32:13.283 --> 00:32:15.368 You live at the Statue of Liberty? 390 00:32:15.452 --> 00:32:18.830 Yes, the Ming Changs have lived at the Statue of Liberty for many generations. 391 00:32:18.914 --> 00:32:21.750 Now, let us locate the orb. 392 00:32:21.833 --> 00:32:25.796 Look, I don't know where Rich is now, but tomorrow's my mom's birthday. 393 00:32:25.879 --> 00:32:28.965 We're going to our neighborhood street fair. Everybody goes. 394 00:32:29.049 --> 00:32:31.468 I'm sure he's gonna be there. 395 00:32:31.510 --> 00:32:35.263 You know, if you want, you could come with me and my mom. 396 00:32:36.807 --> 00:32:39.935 Sir, we can't wait until tomorrow. Our power supply is dwindling. 397 00:32:40.060 --> 00:32:43.980 This child is useless. We must find the orb on our own. 398 00:32:46.024 --> 00:32:49.736 I disagree. Without guidance, we might not find it in time. 399 00:32:50.487 --> 00:32:54.324 Contrary to expectations, Josh has been quite helpful to us. 400 00:32:54.366 --> 00:32:55.867 We will stick with him. 401 00:32:59.538 --> 00:33:01.540 Man, you are awesome at this! 402 00:33:01.581 --> 00:33:04.626 It's like you've got super video-game powers, too. 403 00:33:04.710 --> 00:33:07.838 - Are you sure you're not a superhero? - Absolutely. 404 00:33:07.921 --> 00:33:12.342 Fine, I give up. I'm just happy to be able to play with somebody besides Mom. 405 00:33:12.384 --> 00:33:14.386 Interacting with your mother makes you unhappy? 406 00:33:14.469 --> 00:33:17.222 Nah, I don't mean to complain. She tries. 407 00:33:17.305 --> 00:33:20.016 It's just that Dad was a lot better. 408 00:33:20.058 --> 00:33:22.310 You know, my dad was a hero in real life. 409 00:33:22.394 --> 00:33:26.314 - He saved, like, a million people one time. - That is impressive. 410 00:33:26.398 --> 00:33:28.734 Yeah, we miss him. Especially Mom. 411 00:33:28.817 --> 00:33:31.695 Now she spends all her time smothering me. 412 00:33:31.737 --> 00:33:35.157 - She cuts off your air supply? - Josh, I'm home! 413 00:33:35.241 --> 00:33:38.703 Oh, hey! What are you doing back here? 414 00:33:38.786 --> 00:33:40.413 Some guys with a gun tried to rob the store, 415 00:33:40.496 --> 00:33:42.457 and Dave stopped them and saved everyone! 416 00:33:42.540 --> 00:33:44.667 - It was awesome! - What? What gun? 417 00:33:44.751 --> 00:33:45.918 - Mom, Mom. - Are you all right? 418 00:33:45.960 --> 00:33:50.339 Mom, I'm fine! It was so cool! Dave just took them out. 419 00:33:50.423 --> 00:33:52.717 Man, I wish I could do that. But look at me. 420 00:33:52.800 --> 00:33:55.762 I'm the smallest fifth-grader in New York City. 421 00:33:55.803 --> 00:33:59.974 - You are not small. You are a giant. - Yeah, right. 422 00:34:04.437 --> 00:34:08.066 Josh, the most powerful force in all the universe 423 00:34:08.107 --> 00:34:10.777 often comes from the smallest star. 424 00:34:16.449 --> 00:34:20.036 Dave? Would you like to stay for supper? 425 00:34:20.119 --> 00:34:24.707 Sir, the longer we're in their presence, the greater the danger of exposure. 426 00:34:29.712 --> 00:34:31.214 Yes, I will stay. 427 00:34:34.175 --> 00:34:35.343 Good. 428 00:34:36.052 --> 00:34:38.596 Although, if you thought my driving was dangerous, 429 00:34:38.679 --> 00:34:41.432 wait till you try my meatloaf. 430 00:34:41.516 --> 00:34:42.517 Meat Loaf? 431 00:34:51.651 --> 00:34:53.945 - What are you looking for? - I don't know. 432 00:34:54.028 --> 00:34:55.655 I'll tell you when I find it. 433 00:34:55.738 --> 00:34:57.365 You know something, Dooley? We gotta find you a new hobby. 434 00:34:57.490 --> 00:35:00.034 Stevie, please just hold the insult. 435 00:35:00.159 --> 00:35:01.119 Please. 436 00:35:01.202 --> 00:35:03.246 Oh, I forgot today was Arts and Crafts Day. 437 00:35:29.523 --> 00:35:32.693 Dave, would you mind helping me clear the table? 438 00:35:40.576 --> 00:35:44.496 You know, don't worry about it. I got it. I'm... 439 00:35:44.580 --> 00:35:45.914 This is something I do all the time. 440 00:35:45.998 --> 00:35:49.793 I'm constantly dropping stuff. Don't even worry about it. 441 00:35:50.711 --> 00:35:53.172 "Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. " 442 00:35:54.006 --> 00:35:56.967 Yeah, that's my... 443 00:35:57.051 --> 00:36:01.055 I would... My sister got that for me. I would never... 444 00:36:01.472 --> 00:36:03.557 She just thinks I need to get back in the game, and... 445 00:36:04.058 --> 00:36:07.478 Tell your sister there is no life on Mars! Believe me. 446 00:36:08.729 --> 00:36:10.189 Okay. 447 00:36:16.070 --> 00:36:18.405 This rendering. What is it? 448 00:36:21.867 --> 00:36:25.496 That's just something I felt. 449 00:36:27.956 --> 00:36:30.501 - You felt this. - Yeah, I did. 450 00:36:31.752 --> 00:36:35.089 I did. I don't really paint like that anymore. 451 00:36:35.172 --> 00:36:36.673 And why not? 452 00:36:37.758 --> 00:36:39.802 Well, things have changed. 453 00:36:43.597 --> 00:36:48.435 And what is the feeling demonstrated here? 454 00:36:50.771 --> 00:36:53.232 Well, how does it make you feel? 455 00:36:55.276 --> 00:36:56.486 Feel? 456 00:37:00.115 --> 00:37:04.452 It makes me feel off-balance. 457 00:37:04.536 --> 00:37:06.371 Off-balance, yeah. 458 00:37:06.454 --> 00:37:08.957 That's... That's close. 459 00:37:09.040 --> 00:37:13.002 I remember when I painted this, I just felt love. 460 00:37:13.086 --> 00:37:15.547 Huge and exciting and crazy, 461 00:37:15.588 --> 00:37:17.590 just love. 462 00:37:22.011 --> 00:37:28.059 How do you know when you feel love? 463 00:37:29.102 --> 00:37:31.479 Oh, I think when you feel love, 464 00:37:32.731 --> 00:37:35.442 you don't need to ask that question. 465 00:37:38.153 --> 00:37:39.654 I see. 466 00:37:47.120 --> 00:37:49.080 Time for me to exit into the night. 467 00:37:50.707 --> 00:37:51.833 Okay. 468 00:37:51.875 --> 00:37:55.837 Well, thank you again for being there for Josh today and... 469 00:37:56.629 --> 00:38:00.842 And, yeah, I think tomorrow will be fun. I'm glad you're coming with us. 470 00:38:00.925 --> 00:38:02.927 So am I, Gina Morrison. 471 00:38:05.138 --> 00:38:06.598 Okay. 472 00:38:08.308 --> 00:38:10.810 - Good night, Dave. - Good night, Gina. 473 00:38:25.784 --> 00:38:27.952 Do you mind if I rest here? 474 00:38:29.120 --> 00:38:30.663 Sure. 475 00:38:31.081 --> 00:38:34.542 This appears to be a safe port. We'll join this urban camper. 476 00:38:40.174 --> 00:38:41.801 You ain't crazy, are you? 477 00:38:41.884 --> 00:38:45.471 The last guy was here, he said he was from outer space. 478 00:38:46.222 --> 00:38:47.723 What planet? 479 00:38:49.058 --> 00:38:51.060 And the party continues. 480 00:38:52.937 --> 00:38:56.816 Here. Here you go. Gets a little chilly at night. 481 00:39:01.404 --> 00:39:03.614 Did you see that? 482 00:39:03.697 --> 00:39:05.783 This man has nothing, 483 00:39:05.866 --> 00:39:09.245 yet he offers to share his sole source of warmth. 484 00:39:11.414 --> 00:39:12.540 Why? 485 00:39:12.581 --> 00:39:16.252 It seems they are a more complex species than we imagined. 486 00:39:26.887 --> 00:39:29.640 - Yes? - My findings are incomplete, 487 00:39:29.724 --> 00:39:33.686 but I have noted more atypical behavior spreading throughout the ship. 488 00:39:33.769 --> 00:39:35.229 Is that so? 489 00:39:35.271 --> 00:39:39.066 Well, I think we all just need a good night's rest, Doctor. 490 00:40:01.422 --> 00:40:03.424 - Dang! - Excuse me? 491 00:40:18.482 --> 00:40:20.442 Working rather late, No. 3. 492 00:40:20.525 --> 00:40:23.278 I was just doing some additional cultural research. 493 00:40:23.403 --> 00:40:25.405 And what have you found? 494 00:40:25.489 --> 00:40:29.910 I stumbled onto an interesting file in the alien database, sir. 495 00:40:31.203 --> 00:40:34.956 Every man, woman and child is forced to view it once a year. 496 00:40:35.957 --> 00:40:38.752 It could be helpful in understanding them. 497 00:40:38.835 --> 00:40:40.253 Show me. 498 00:40:42.631 --> 00:40:45.759 You have not changed since our days at the Academy. 499 00:40:45.842 --> 00:40:48.470 I remember the late nights studying together. 500 00:40:48.553 --> 00:40:51.098 And the nutritious protein squares you prepared for us. 501 00:40:51.181 --> 00:40:54.726 I would not have been able to graduate without your help. 502 00:40:56.186 --> 00:41:01.316 And, yet, here you've become our generation's most renowned captain. 503 00:41:02.859 --> 00:41:04.361 Yes. 504 00:41:07.030 --> 00:41:08.532 Here it is. 505 00:41:13.328 --> 00:41:16.164 What is it you want, Mary? What do you want? 506 00:41:16.289 --> 00:41:18.834 You want the moon? Just say the word 507 00:41:18.875 --> 00:41:21.628 and I'll throw a lasso around it and pull it down. 508 00:41:21.670 --> 00:41:25.132 Hey, that's a pretty good idea. I'll give you the moon, Mary. 509 00:41:25.215 --> 00:41:26.216 I'll take it. 510 00:41:51.074 --> 00:41:52.617 Lasso the moon? 511 00:41:53.702 --> 00:41:56.538 - Physically impossible! - Absurd. 512 00:42:08.051 --> 00:42:11.679 - Good night, Captain. - Yes, Three, good night. 513 00:42:13.806 --> 00:42:17.435 I must say, sir, these Earth creatures keep surprising me. 514 00:42:17.518 --> 00:42:20.897 A most confusing place. It makes my head spin. 515 00:42:20.980 --> 00:42:23.357 I guess I'd better hold on, then. 516 00:43:11.906 --> 00:43:14.534 I want to send this out to every precinct, every security company 517 00:43:14.617 --> 00:43:17.578 and every hospital in the city until we ID this guy right here. 518 00:43:17.662 --> 00:43:21.040 This is incredible. Just amazing. 519 00:43:21.124 --> 00:43:24.377 Amazing that two idiots like you could've passed the police exam. 520 00:43:24.460 --> 00:43:26.629 - See? I tried to tell him, Sarge. - Hold on. 521 00:43:26.713 --> 00:43:30.049 It is a fact, a fact, that something or someone has landed here. 522 00:43:30.133 --> 00:43:33.219 Now, we could be making the biggest scientific discovery of all time. 523 00:43:33.302 --> 00:43:37.014 I don't want to hear another word about E.T., Bigfoot or the Tooth Fairy, 524 00:43:37.098 --> 00:43:40.309 unless they're jacking some old lady's car. 525 00:43:41.395 --> 00:43:43.981 - You got that? - Yes, sir. 526 00:43:44.022 --> 00:43:46.191 - That's good aim, Sarge. - Shut up! 527 00:43:47.401 --> 00:43:50.612 - Dooley. What are you doing? - I'm sending it anyway, Knox. 528 00:43:50.696 --> 00:43:53.031 No, it's just a guy who shoved his face in the dirt. 529 00:43:53.157 --> 00:43:54.908 No, wrong. It is an alien, 530 00:43:54.950 --> 00:43:59.079 an alien who shoved his face in the dirt, and I am gonna find him. 531 00:44:12.051 --> 00:44:16.930 Power reserves at 20%, sir. That only gives us about 12 hours. 532 00:44:17.014 --> 00:44:20.809 Then every minute counts. Remember our mission, crew. 533 00:44:20.893 --> 00:44:24.146 We must find the boy with the orb. No distractions. 534 00:44:55.886 --> 00:44:57.930 This is not acceptable! 535 00:44:59.473 --> 00:45:00.724 And here we go, ladies and gentlemen. 536 00:45:00.808 --> 00:45:04.061 Chuck starts off fast out of the gate, eating down those dogs, 537 00:45:04.103 --> 00:45:09.358 but Earl and Homer are right behind him. Look at them go! Look at them go! 538 00:45:09.400 --> 00:45:13.320 - Come on, Dave, eat! - Dave, just put it in your mouth! 539 00:45:13.404 --> 00:45:17.324 - What are you doing? Eat it! - Just put one in your mouth, Dave! 540 00:45:18.742 --> 00:45:21.203 - Put it in, come on, now! - Dave! Dave, eat! 541 00:45:21.788 --> 00:45:23.915 You never should have signed him up for this. 542 00:45:25.041 --> 00:45:29.546 - What are you doing, Dave? Eat! - Eat it, Dave! Put it in your mouth! 543 00:45:31.923 --> 00:45:33.800 Yeah, all right! Yeah! Yeah! 544 00:45:34.801 --> 00:45:37.303 A little heads-up might be nice! 545 00:45:40.974 --> 00:45:45.019 Hey! Can a brother get some hot sauce with that? 546 00:45:45.729 --> 00:45:47.397 Look at him go! 547 00:46:00.285 --> 00:46:04.914 Our champion! Eighty-five delicious all-beef hot dogs! 548 00:46:04.998 --> 00:46:06.124 Yeah! 549 00:46:09.169 --> 00:46:10.879 Yeah, boy! Yeah! 550 00:46:13.590 --> 00:46:15.383 Well executed, Captain. 551 00:46:15.467 --> 00:46:19.429 Dave, that was amazing! You are a wiener-eating champ! 552 00:46:19.512 --> 00:46:21.806 And here's the grand prize. 553 00:46:24.934 --> 00:46:26.686 We're under attack! 554 00:46:26.770 --> 00:46:29.481 It's the creature from Thanos 7! Battle stations! 555 00:46:29.522 --> 00:46:33.193 You have menaced us for the last time, you beast! 556 00:46:45.080 --> 00:46:49.125 It seems that this is an inanimate creature. 557 00:46:50.543 --> 00:46:52.420 At ease! 558 00:46:52.504 --> 00:46:57.133 The question is, what are we expected to do with this plush amphibian? 559 00:46:58.676 --> 00:47:00.637 Give it to her, Captain. 560 00:47:02.223 --> 00:47:04.767 The female. Give it to her. 561 00:47:08.062 --> 00:47:09.522 Silly goose. 562 00:47:12.024 --> 00:47:14.068 You are such a goofball. 563 00:47:20.741 --> 00:47:25.329 For me? Thanks, Dave. That was... 564 00:47:25.413 --> 00:47:27.498 That's very sweet. 565 00:47:27.581 --> 00:47:29.500 Red alert, Captain! Red alert! 566 00:47:30.000 --> 00:47:35.923 We need to dispose of the large quantity of processed meat tubes! 567 00:47:37.508 --> 00:47:38.968 Excuse me. 568 00:47:39.593 --> 00:47:42.138 My colon is impacted. 569 00:47:45.850 --> 00:47:47.059 Okay. 570 00:48:11.083 --> 00:48:12.501 Show-off! 571 00:48:18.466 --> 00:48:20.885 Excuse me! Excuse me, we met yesterday. 572 00:48:21.010 --> 00:48:23.471 - Mark Rhodes. - Mark Rhodes? 573 00:48:25.264 --> 00:48:27.725 - Right. The left again. - Yeah. 574 00:48:40.446 --> 00:48:43.032 - So, you here by yourself? - No, I am not. 575 00:48:43.116 --> 00:48:45.160 I am accompanying Josh and Gina. 576 00:48:45.243 --> 00:48:48.163 All evening we have been screaming with fear and delight. 577 00:48:48.246 --> 00:48:51.291 Look, you and I should get something straight, 578 00:48:51.375 --> 00:48:53.627 and I'm not trying to step on your toes, here. 579 00:48:53.710 --> 00:48:55.879 If you're serious about Gina, then that's great, 580 00:48:55.962 --> 00:48:58.799 because she deserves a decent guy in her life, 581 00:48:58.840 --> 00:49:01.510 but if I find out that you're just trying to take advantage of her, 582 00:49:01.593 --> 00:49:03.970 and you're using Josh to do it, 583 00:49:04.012 --> 00:49:06.973 you and I are gonna have a serious problem. 584 00:49:08.600 --> 00:49:10.936 You understand what I'm saying? 585 00:49:11.770 --> 00:49:14.564 Yes, I understand completely, Mark Rhodes. 586 00:49:16.024 --> 00:49:18.193 Does anyone here understand what this man is talking about? 587 00:49:18.235 --> 00:49:21.196 He's trying to discern if you intend on becoming Gina's mate. 588 00:49:21.279 --> 00:49:22.739 What an absurd notion! 589 00:49:22.823 --> 00:49:26.701 I intend on becoming Gina's mate? She's the size of our science pavilion. 590 00:49:26.785 --> 00:49:30.288 These primitive creatures and their silly speculations! 591 00:49:31.832 --> 00:49:33.834 Wait! What's that? 592 00:49:35.377 --> 00:49:38.380 - What do you want, midget? - Rich, you gotta give me my rock back. 593 00:49:38.463 --> 00:49:39.506 Oh, really? Why? 594 00:49:39.589 --> 00:49:41.883 Because it's really important to me and my friend, Dave. 595 00:49:41.967 --> 00:49:43.343 It's the jerk we seek! 596 00:49:43.468 --> 00:49:45.554 Rich, you've gotta give me my rock back! 597 00:49:45.637 --> 00:49:48.348 Boy, it's like you're asking me to punch you! 598 00:49:48.390 --> 00:49:51.101 So, Smellmy, we meet again. 599 00:49:51.184 --> 00:49:52.436 Dave. 600 00:49:58.400 --> 00:50:00.819 Stop! You're giving me a wedgie! 601 00:50:04.656 --> 00:50:07.367 Stop! Please put me down, already! 602 00:50:13.415 --> 00:50:15.709 Smellmy, are you crying because you are sad 603 00:50:15.792 --> 00:50:19.796 or because your undergarments are lodged so cuttingly deep in your rectum? 604 00:50:19.880 --> 00:50:21.965 I'm telling my mom. 605 00:50:22.090 --> 00:50:24.384 Mom! Mom! 606 00:50:26.679 --> 00:50:29.432 Dave, that was unbelievable! High-five! 607 00:50:32.769 --> 00:50:35.480 They don't high-five where you're from? 608 00:50:35.563 --> 00:50:38.191 - No, but they should. - There you two are! 609 00:50:38.274 --> 00:50:39.776 What kind of trouble you getting into? 610 00:50:39.859 --> 00:50:44.697 Nothing. Dave was just about to try out his pitching arm! 611 00:50:46.032 --> 00:50:48.242 - Come on, Dave. - Go, Dave! Go, Dave! 612 00:50:48.284 --> 00:50:51.871 - You just gotta hit three. Here we go. - Come on! Come on, come on! 613 00:50:51.954 --> 00:50:53.706 Go, Dave! Go, Dave! 614 00:50:54.874 --> 00:51:01.547 Sir, the orb is ours. This charade is no longer necessary. 615 00:51:01.631 --> 00:51:05.218 It's time to throw it in the ocean and head home. 616 00:51:05.301 --> 00:51:08.096 You're absolutely right, Two, 617 00:51:08.137 --> 00:51:12.266 but I really think I can do this. 618 00:51:13.810 --> 00:51:15.686 He looks very serious. 619 00:51:15.770 --> 00:51:17.355 Looking good, looking good. Come on, you can do it! 620 00:51:17.438 --> 00:51:19.190 Here we go. He's gonna do it! 621 00:51:20.483 --> 00:51:21.984 Wind up! 622 00:51:24.654 --> 00:51:26.030 All right, well... 623 00:51:26.114 --> 00:51:29.409 Spectacularly unsuccessful! Why was my wrist so limp? 624 00:51:29.992 --> 00:51:32.203 I was in the bathroom. 625 00:51:35.123 --> 00:51:36.457 On my command. 626 00:51:36.541 --> 00:51:38.918 - Come on, you can hit it. - Two more. Come on. 627 00:51:38.960 --> 00:51:40.586 Come on. Come on. 628 00:51:44.132 --> 00:51:45.633 Fire! 629 00:51:47.301 --> 00:51:48.928 Incoming! 630 00:51:53.808 --> 00:51:55.143 Engineer, report! 631 00:51:55.184 --> 00:51:59.355 All sensors are down and the sun shields deployed upon impact. 632 00:51:59.439 --> 00:52:01.357 Sir, we're blacked out. 633 00:52:08.198 --> 00:52:11.201 The sun is exploding in my face! 634 00:52:11.744 --> 00:52:15.038 I still haven't got a pulse. Give me the paddles, stat. 635 00:52:15.164 --> 00:52:17.374 - Oh, God. Don't watch. - Clear! 636 00:52:19.209 --> 00:52:21.128 Come on. Give me more juice. 637 00:52:21.253 --> 00:52:22.463 Clear! 638 00:52:26.216 --> 00:52:27.968 Power has been restored. 639 00:52:28.010 --> 00:52:31.555 Oh, thank God! Oh, God, is he gonna be okay? 640 00:52:32.598 --> 00:52:34.933 We'll do an MRI just to be safe. 641 00:52:35.017 --> 00:52:36.852 He's okay. He's okay. 642 00:52:39.897 --> 00:52:42.107 How we doing? I have to warm it up first, 643 00:52:42.191 --> 00:52:44.860 but just to double-check, they took your keys, watch, coins? 644 00:52:44.902 --> 00:52:46.820 - Yes. - Good. 645 00:52:46.904 --> 00:52:50.991 'Cause people always forget the "M" in MRI stands for "magnetic." 646 00:52:53.077 --> 00:52:55.579 This'll just take a second. 647 00:53:03.754 --> 00:53:06.340 I guess I still have a few pennies. 648 00:53:07.925 --> 00:53:09.843 I'm so sorry to have ruined your birthday. 649 00:53:10.761 --> 00:53:12.471 Thanks for letting the cat out of the bag. 650 00:53:12.554 --> 00:53:15.516 - Cat? Where's the cat? - You know, it's okay, 651 00:53:15.599 --> 00:53:18.811 because I'm not really one for celebrating anyway. 652 00:53:18.894 --> 00:53:21.647 Well, perhaps you will reconsider and let us take you out for dinner. 653 00:53:21.730 --> 00:53:23.190 Yeah. 654 00:53:25.234 --> 00:53:28.695 Sir, with all due respect, have you lost your mind? 655 00:53:28.779 --> 00:53:32.574 They've helped us. The least we can do is try to help them. 656 00:53:33.367 --> 00:53:36.245 You have become a fool! 657 00:53:36.328 --> 00:53:39.915 Treating these lumbering giants as if they're our equals. 658 00:53:39.998 --> 00:53:42.960 You've made a mockery of our entire mission! 659 00:53:43.627 --> 00:53:46.422 You get out of my face. Now! 660 00:53:54.139 --> 00:53:55.807 Dave? 661 00:53:55.890 --> 00:53:57.600 Dave? Hello? 662 00:53:57.600 --> 00:54:00.270 - Right here. - Hey, where'd you go? 663 00:54:00.311 --> 00:54:01.896 I am here. 664 00:54:01.980 --> 00:54:05.942 I'm so curious sometimes, what's going on in that head of yours. 665 00:54:05.942 --> 00:54:08.278 I was just pondering which would be the best place to take you 666 00:54:08.361 --> 00:54:10.739 to commemorate your birthday. 667 00:54:10.822 --> 00:54:14.284 Josh, do you have any suggestions? Perhaps a nice Cuban place? 668 00:54:14.325 --> 00:54:16.411 I know a great salsa restaurant. 669 00:54:18.371 --> 00:54:21.291 All right, well, sí, amigos, let's go party. 670 00:54:22.125 --> 00:54:25.253 Everyone! We're going to go and party! 671 00:54:45.774 --> 00:54:48.068 Okay, three mojitos, one virgin. 672 00:54:48.151 --> 00:54:49.486 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 673 00:54:49.527 --> 00:54:51.446 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 674 00:54:51.488 --> 00:54:53.656 - Thank you. - There you go. You enjoy. 675 00:54:53.740 --> 00:54:56.034 - Cheers. - Happy birthday, Mom. 676 00:54:56.117 --> 00:54:57.744 Thank you. 677 00:54:58.578 --> 00:55:01.581 Now, careful. These go straight to your head. 678 00:55:22.894 --> 00:55:25.814 This is not acceptable! 679 00:55:27.691 --> 00:55:29.360 Slow down, cowboy. 680 00:55:33.072 --> 00:55:34.865 This is the best! 681 00:55:34.949 --> 00:55:38.494 Cougar46 just added me as a friend. 682 00:55:38.577 --> 00:55:40.079 - Yeah! - Yeah! 683 00:55:41.622 --> 00:55:44.917 He walked out about an hour ago with a nice-looking lady and a kid. 684 00:55:44.959 --> 00:55:49.130 - Oh, really? Nice-looking? She pretty hot? - Please! Please. 685 00:55:49.213 --> 00:55:51.465 - You sure it's him? - Absolutely. 686 00:55:51.549 --> 00:55:53.801 Said they were going to a Cuban salsa place. 687 00:56:08.274 --> 00:56:09.567 You gotta try this. 688 00:56:09.650 --> 00:56:13.571 It's like space travel, only in your head. 689 00:56:20.578 --> 00:56:26.709 I've been having strange feelings since we've arrived on this planet. 690 00:56:28.044 --> 00:56:31.255 - It seems you are, too? - Absolutely not. 691 00:56:31.297 --> 00:56:35.384 Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm recalibrating our weapon systems. 692 00:56:35.468 --> 00:56:36.635 Just a second. 693 00:56:42.141 --> 00:56:45.811 Exactly what weapon are you recalibrating? 694 00:56:46.187 --> 00:56:47.938 Okay, let's talk. 695 00:56:49.190 --> 00:56:50.941 I'm feeling a little busted. 696 00:56:56.489 --> 00:56:58.282 You know, pretty soon you're gonna be too old 697 00:56:58.365 --> 00:56:59.617 to dance with your mom. 698 00:56:59.658 --> 00:57:02.411 Excuse me while I run to the restroom. 699 00:57:03.037 --> 00:57:04.497 Josh. 700 00:57:04.580 --> 00:57:06.582 I will be going home soon. 701 00:57:11.546 --> 00:57:13.840 What is the matter with you? 702 00:57:13.924 --> 00:57:18.303 When you're gone, everything's just gonna go back to the way it was. 703 00:57:18.387 --> 00:57:20.430 I'm not like other kids. 704 00:57:20.514 --> 00:57:22.849 I can't even fight for myself. 705 00:57:23.433 --> 00:57:25.602 My dad was a hero. 706 00:57:25.644 --> 00:57:27.312 But me? 707 00:57:27.396 --> 00:57:30.607 I'm just different. 708 00:57:33.360 --> 00:57:36.446 Josh, listen to me. 709 00:57:36.530 --> 00:57:40.659 We would never have been able to find the orb without you. 710 00:57:40.742 --> 00:57:43.954 Not everyone would have helped us, but you did. 711 00:57:44.037 --> 00:57:46.498 Because you are different. 712 00:57:47.457 --> 00:57:50.335 I am very lucky to have a friend like you. 713 00:57:50.836 --> 00:57:54.089 - You're just saying that. - No, I am not. 714 00:57:54.214 --> 00:57:57.968 You have helped us greatly. We are all in great debt to you. 715 00:57:58.969 --> 00:58:00.470 I did? 716 00:58:00.846 --> 00:58:03.807 Yes. We are saved, Josh. 717 00:58:16.528 --> 00:58:19.698 She thinks she's so hot. She's not hot. Have you seen her butt? 718 00:58:19.781 --> 00:58:24.286 - It's like the size of our moon. - You are so bad. 719 00:58:24.369 --> 00:58:27.247 Bad and gorgeous! 720 00:58:32.335 --> 00:58:35.338 Okay, another one. I took the liberty. 721 00:58:36.256 --> 00:58:38.091 I love this song. 722 00:58:42.721 --> 00:58:45.599 Need anything, Captain? 723 00:58:45.682 --> 00:58:48.852 Yes, I may need some music references for... 724 00:58:53.191 --> 00:58:55.568 Dave, will you do me the honor? 725 00:58:55.651 --> 00:58:57.028 Come on! 726 00:58:57.361 --> 00:58:58.821 It'll be fun. 727 00:58:58.988 --> 00:59:02.200 Yes, yes, I would, I'd love to dance with you. 728 00:59:02.241 --> 00:59:04.243 You're gonna love it! 729 00:59:06.621 --> 00:59:10.458 Here, it's really easy. Just let the music take you. 730 00:59:10.541 --> 00:59:13.544 All hands, stay alert, and obey my commands to the letter. 731 00:59:13.628 --> 00:59:16.422 - Captain, might I have a word? - Make it brief. 732 00:59:16.506 --> 00:59:19.634 There are emotional dangers on this planet we did not foresee. 733 00:59:19.717 --> 00:59:21.928 We are on the brink of anarchy. 734 00:59:21.928 --> 00:59:24.013 Not now. I'm trying to let the music take me! 735 00:59:24.055 --> 00:59:26.349 All right, crew, everyone, let's get it together, now! 736 00:59:26.516 --> 00:59:27.975 All together! 737 00:59:28.059 --> 00:59:29.769 Precision! 738 00:59:29.811 --> 00:59:32.647 Right foot! Left foot! 739 00:59:38.903 --> 00:59:41.364 Okay. Here, just follow my lead. 740 00:59:44.700 --> 00:59:47.495 We should be fulfilling our mission, trying to save our planet, 741 00:59:47.578 --> 00:59:53.584 not leaping around like some sort of idiot, attempting to woo a gigantic strumpet! 742 00:59:53.668 --> 00:59:56.629 This captain has become a joke. 743 00:59:57.672 --> 01:00:01.259 This is over the line, sir. The Captain still deserves our respect. 744 01:00:01.342 --> 01:00:04.303 Shake my hips like this! More hips! Hips! 745 01:00:04.345 --> 01:00:07.807 Yes, that's it! More hips! Look, I'm dancing! 746 01:00:07.807 --> 01:00:09.559 All right, I'm in. 747 01:00:11.978 --> 01:00:13.604 The dancing stops now. 748 01:00:16.023 --> 01:00:18.860 Here, here. Hand here. Okay? 749 01:00:18.943 --> 01:00:21.779 I need more wiggle in the posterior region! 750 01:00:22.155 --> 01:00:24.782 Captain, if I may? 751 01:00:24.824 --> 01:00:26.367 You think that you can do better? 752 01:00:26.451 --> 01:00:29.662 Nothing personal, sir, but that won't be hard. 753 01:00:29.787 --> 01:00:31.289 Take charge. 754 01:00:33.250 --> 01:00:35.461 Okay, boys and girls, everybody listen up! 755 01:00:35.544 --> 01:00:36.503 You're gonna give me a basic, 756 01:00:36.587 --> 01:00:38.839 stepping forward with the left and back with the right. 757 01:00:38.922 --> 01:00:40.924 Don't bounce, and do not over think it. 758 01:00:50.809 --> 01:00:53.270 We're gonna put your accoutrements right up against her. 759 01:00:53.395 --> 01:00:54.730 Drop down. 760 01:00:59.735 --> 01:01:01.695 This is salsa, people. Let's make it spicy! 761 01:01:04.740 --> 01:01:06.116 Follow me! 762 01:01:23.217 --> 01:01:25.552 I knew you were holding out on me. 763 01:01:26.595 --> 01:01:28.138 Come on, come on, girl. 764 01:01:28.222 --> 01:01:31.558 I'm about to show you how to do the forbidden dance. 765 01:01:32.768 --> 01:01:34.353 It's my birthday! 766 01:01:35.020 --> 01:01:37.398 And dip her, like a cookie in milk. 767 01:01:37.481 --> 01:01:39.316 I feel good. I feel loose. 768 01:01:39.400 --> 01:01:42.778 I feel good. I feel loose. I feel good. 769 01:01:44.863 --> 01:01:45.906 Hey! 770 01:01:58.335 --> 01:02:00.045 Freeze! 771 01:02:00.129 --> 01:02:03.132 - Everybody, stay calm. - Hands up. Hands up! 772 01:02:04.925 --> 01:02:06.635 Should we power up blasters? 773 01:02:06.760 --> 01:02:08.429 No. 774 01:02:09.263 --> 01:02:11.223 Too many innocent civilians. 775 01:02:11.640 --> 01:02:13.517 Easy, folks, easy. 776 01:02:13.601 --> 01:02:16.563 - Step back, please. - Dave? 777 01:02:16.646 --> 01:02:18.773 Hey, welcome to Earth. 778 01:02:38.960 --> 01:02:40.378 Greetings. 779 01:02:45.216 --> 01:02:47.343 We don't want to hurt you. 780 01:02:49.554 --> 01:02:52.098 We don't want to hurt you. 781 01:02:53.516 --> 01:02:55.143 We're you're friends. 782 01:02:55.226 --> 01:02:58.980 All we want to know is why you've come down to our planet. 783 01:02:59.022 --> 01:03:00.482 Oh, for God sake. 784 01:03:01.483 --> 01:03:04.277 Stay calm. They can't prove anything. 785 01:03:05.111 --> 01:03:06.488 What is your purpose here? 786 01:03:07.155 --> 01:03:09.115 What is your purpose here? 787 01:03:09.199 --> 01:03:11.159 - The mystery is what your purpose here is. - Okay, you know what? 788 01:03:11.242 --> 01:03:13.661 I'm trying to do a thing, and you're not helping me out, so please stop. 789 01:03:15.914 --> 01:03:17.415 Greetings! 790 01:03:18.458 --> 01:03:20.001 No. 2, what are you doing? 791 01:03:20.126 --> 01:03:22.796 - You can't do this, Two. - Excuse me? 792 01:03:22.837 --> 01:03:26.424 We're playing by my rules now, Ex-Captain! 793 01:03:26.508 --> 01:03:27.967 Seize him! 794 01:03:31.179 --> 01:03:36.017 - You cannot do this, No. 2! - Can, and will. 795 01:03:36.059 --> 01:03:39.646 - You brought this on yourself. - What are we supposed to do? 796 01:03:39.729 --> 01:03:42.565 You do what you took an oath to do and protect me, your captain, Four. 797 01:03:42.607 --> 01:03:44.984 Stay back, Four. I don't want to see anyone get hurt. 798 01:03:45.026 --> 01:03:48.196 You'll never get away with this, Two. The rest of the crew will not support you! 799 01:03:48.279 --> 01:03:51.533 Oh, yes, they will. Because they have a mission to complete. 800 01:03:52.283 --> 01:03:54.077 Three, you're supporting this? 801 01:03:54.120 --> 01:03:55.830 Yes, I see no other way. 802 01:03:55.913 --> 01:03:59.125 That's because there is no other way. 803 01:03:59.208 --> 01:04:01.335 Whoa, who left the speaker on? 804 01:04:01.377 --> 01:04:02.878 Shut that off! 805 01:04:07.717 --> 01:04:11.595 Officer Dooley, can I speak to you outside? Just for a minute. 806 01:04:15.474 --> 01:04:18.728 You will regret this. Something has been awakened in all of us. 807 01:04:18.769 --> 01:04:20.813 Something you will never be able to stop. 808 01:04:20.896 --> 01:04:24.900 Looks like I just did. Confine him to his quarters! 809 01:04:26.902 --> 01:04:29.864 Attention, crew! As of this moment, 810 01:04:29.947 --> 01:04:33.868 un-Nilian behavior will no longer be permitted. 811 01:04:33.951 --> 01:04:35.786 In fact, it will be punished. 812 01:04:35.828 --> 01:04:37.246 Severely. 813 01:04:37.329 --> 01:04:40.458 A new era has begun, with me as your leader. 814 01:04:40.583 --> 01:04:42.918 You know, we just met him a couple days ago, 815 01:04:42.960 --> 01:04:44.795 - like I've said five times. - Hey. 816 01:04:44.879 --> 01:04:46.297 - Hey! - You guys all right? 817 01:04:46.380 --> 01:04:49.091 Yes. It's been a long night. 818 01:04:49.175 --> 01:04:50.342 - What do they want with him? - I don't know. 819 01:04:50.384 --> 01:04:52.720 He didn't do anything wrong! 820 01:04:54.805 --> 01:04:56.891 Stand and engage blasters! 821 01:04:58.017 --> 01:04:59.310 Sir? 822 01:05:00.436 --> 01:05:02.146 I gave you an order. 823 01:05:02.605 --> 01:05:03.939 Yes, sir. 824 01:05:04.607 --> 01:05:07.151 - Did you not just hear those voices? - Yes, I heard the voices. 825 01:05:07.234 --> 01:05:10.905 Wow, we got a nutjob living in New York City. What are the odds? 826 01:05:10.988 --> 01:05:12.531 So what are you saying? We should just let him go? 827 01:05:12.615 --> 01:05:14.784 Yes, I think we should let him go! That's exactly what I'm saying! 828 01:05:14.867 --> 01:05:18.829 That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard in my entire life! 829 01:05:19.497 --> 01:05:20.623 Hey! 830 01:05:23.918 --> 01:05:25.795 Activate heat shields. 831 01:05:29.423 --> 01:05:31.801 - Freeze! - Look out! 832 01:05:33.886 --> 01:05:37.556 This guy's crazy! Somebody about to get killed! 833 01:05:37.641 --> 01:05:40.268 I'm out! Son of a... 834 01:05:45.857 --> 01:05:47.275 Take cover! 835 01:05:57.786 --> 01:05:59.996 You, woman and child, 836 01:06:00.080 --> 01:06:03.667 you have wasted enough time with your pathetic emotional distractions. 837 01:06:03.750 --> 01:06:05.210 Dave? 838 01:06:05.293 --> 01:06:09.297 Your undisciplined human frailty causes nothing but chaos! 839 01:06:09.339 --> 01:06:11.675 And one other thing, your so-called artwork 840 01:06:11.675 --> 01:06:14.219 is both pretentious and sophomoric. 841 01:06:20.308 --> 01:06:22.269 I could do this all day. 842 01:06:33.029 --> 01:06:34.239 Freeze! 843 01:06:44.916 --> 01:06:48.378 Three, find me the fastest route to the landing site. 844 01:06:48.462 --> 01:06:50.005 Three, I... 845 01:06:52.299 --> 01:06:53.675 Guards! 846 01:06:55.469 --> 01:06:59.139 No. 12! Have you been working out? 847 01:07:00.140 --> 01:07:01.850 You can tell? 848 01:07:01.933 --> 01:07:03.185 No. 849 01:07:06.354 --> 01:07:07.939 Yes. 850 01:07:07.981 --> 01:07:10.317 - Thank you, Three. - I didn't do this to help you. 851 01:07:10.400 --> 01:07:12.277 I did this to stop that lunatic! 852 01:07:12.360 --> 01:07:17.616 - What have I done to hurt you so? - You really can't be that oblivious! 853 01:07:17.700 --> 01:07:20.078 Listen to me. Whatever I have done to hurt you, I apologize, 854 01:07:20.161 --> 01:07:21.579 but right now we have to get to the engine room 855 01:07:21.662 --> 01:07:24.957 - and shut down the ship! - Fine! Let's just go. 856 01:07:25.750 --> 01:07:27.251 What in Nil is your problem? 857 01:07:27.794 --> 01:07:28.920 Are you all right, Josh? 858 01:07:29.003 --> 01:07:32.548 Mom, I'm fine, but something's wrong. That can't be Dave! 859 01:07:32.673 --> 01:07:35.968 You have to trust me. We need to go after him. 860 01:07:36.052 --> 01:07:37.595 No, Josh, we're not doing that. 861 01:07:37.720 --> 01:07:39.806 - I know you want to protect me. - Of course. 862 01:07:39.889 --> 01:07:44.060 But Dave is my friend, and I need to protect him right now. 863 01:07:44.143 --> 01:07:46.104 - Josh. - If we don't help him, 864 01:07:46.187 --> 01:07:49.649 something terrible's gonna happen. I know it! 865 01:07:50.316 --> 01:07:53.111 I was just making conversation to ease the apparent tension between us. 866 01:07:53.152 --> 01:07:56.406 - Don't. You're making it worse. - You know what... 867 01:08:04.997 --> 01:08:08.334 No. 3, didn't take you long to betray me. 868 01:08:08.376 --> 01:08:10.086 This is not the answer, Two! 869 01:08:10.128 --> 01:08:14.006 You weren't Nilian enough to do your duty, 870 01:08:14.090 --> 01:08:17.093 - so you left me no choice. - Listen to reason. 871 01:08:17.135 --> 01:08:19.679 We thought that Earth was not worth preserving. We were wrong. 872 01:08:19.762 --> 01:08:21.222 There's much we've learned from this place. 873 01:08:21.305 --> 01:08:25.601 - We must not hurt these people! - Yes, we must! 874 01:08:26.728 --> 01:08:32.775 And since you two seem to love these gargantuan beasts so much, 875 01:08:32.817 --> 01:08:34.986 have fun living among them. 876 01:08:38.489 --> 01:08:40.992 I have a little tickle in my nose. 877 01:09:01.972 --> 01:09:04.099 - Follow me! - No, follow me! 878 01:09:07.519 --> 01:09:09.688 Three, I'm so sorry that you're out here with me. 879 01:09:09.772 --> 01:09:11.482 Not half as sorry as I am! 880 01:09:11.523 --> 01:09:15.110 Please, we'll have the entire journey back home to argue. 881 01:09:15.819 --> 01:09:19.531 - This may not be the best spot, sir. - And why not? 882 01:09:22.701 --> 01:09:24.369 Mother of Nil! 883 01:09:37.341 --> 01:09:38.550 Three! 884 01:09:42.679 --> 01:09:45.766 - I'm coming, Three. Don't move. - Great advice, Captain. 885 01:09:45.808 --> 01:09:47.684 Because I can't! 886 01:09:54.942 --> 01:09:57.069 - Are you all right, Three? - Please! You have no concern for me. 887 01:09:57.194 --> 01:09:59.488 All you care about is Gina, your big, fat girlfriend! 888 01:09:59.571 --> 01:10:00.531 You think that she's fat? 889 01:10:00.614 --> 01:10:02.408 If she wears a size infinity, 890 01:10:04.201 --> 01:10:06.036 then she's fat! 891 01:10:09.331 --> 01:10:12.751 It takes me almost getting run over for you to even notice me! 892 01:10:12.835 --> 01:10:15.295 I'm practically invisible to you! 893 01:10:16.922 --> 01:10:19.883 Invisible? Quite the opposite. When I look at you, what I see is 894 01:10:19.925 --> 01:10:21.218 the ship! 895 01:10:26.265 --> 01:10:28.392 I love New York. Let's go! 896 01:10:34.398 --> 01:10:36.275 Trust me, Three. Jump! 897 01:10:43.825 --> 01:10:45.326 It's working! 898 01:10:53.460 --> 01:10:55.670 You see? Just as I planned! 899 01:11:08.141 --> 01:11:10.310 Look, if we let go at precisely the right moment, 900 01:11:10.393 --> 01:11:11.936 we'll be propelled to the ship. 901 01:11:12.771 --> 01:11:14.064 On three. 902 01:11:14.814 --> 01:11:20.445 One, two, three! 903 01:11:26.826 --> 01:11:28.119 Three. 904 01:11:29.496 --> 01:11:33.166 I asked for you to be assigned to this mission 905 01:11:33.208 --> 01:11:37.670 because you are kind, intelligent and beautiful, 906 01:11:37.754 --> 01:11:40.882 more so than anyone I've ever known in my life. 907 01:11:41.466 --> 01:11:43.259 And without you, 908 01:11:44.886 --> 01:11:46.679 I would be nothing. 909 01:11:48.848 --> 01:11:51.935 Why have you never spoken to me of this before? 910 01:11:52.685 --> 01:11:55.438 Because I was too Nilian to express it. 911 01:11:56.398 --> 01:11:59.901 I should have lassoed the moon for you long ago. 912 01:12:15.250 --> 01:12:17.836 But now let's turn the ship around. 913 01:12:26.095 --> 01:12:29.265 We'll never get there at this rate. Give me full power to the legs! 914 01:12:29.348 --> 01:12:33.519 I told you. Our power is nearly depleted. 915 01:12:37.565 --> 01:12:40.192 Crew, prepare to hail a cab! 916 01:12:42.695 --> 01:12:43.779 Taxi! 917 01:12:49.702 --> 01:12:52.705 What? An alien cannot get a cab in this town? 918 01:12:58.753 --> 01:13:02.089 Hey, buddy! This is my cab! What are you doing? 919 01:13:03.132 --> 01:13:06.761 Liberty Island Ferry. Make haste or die. 920 01:13:08.846 --> 01:13:12.725 Yes, every available cop in the city, and the Feds. 921 01:13:12.808 --> 01:13:17.146 I knew it. I knew it, I knew it! I knew we were not alone in this universe. 922 01:13:17.229 --> 01:13:20.816 - Look, I'm not convinced he's an alien. - Oh, you're not? 923 01:13:22.026 --> 01:13:25.529 - So what? - So what? So, who you calling? 924 01:13:25.613 --> 01:13:27.323 - Homeland Security. - Don't do that. 925 01:13:27.406 --> 01:13:29.617 They're gonna overreact! We don't even know why he's visiting yet. 926 01:13:29.658 --> 01:13:32.369 Well, it's obviously not a peace mission! 927 01:13:32.453 --> 01:13:34.872 Get those big slobbery lips away from me! 928 01:13:34.955 --> 01:13:36.957 And while you suckers are sitting here talking, 929 01:13:37.041 --> 01:13:39.001 he about to go suck your planet dry! 930 01:13:39.043 --> 01:13:41.420 I need somebody from Homeland Security, please. 931 01:13:41.462 --> 01:13:43.339 I don't have the extension. 932 01:13:43.422 --> 01:13:44.840 - Are you with Dave? - No. 933 01:13:44.924 --> 01:13:47.635 No, no. I come free with a venti latte. 934 01:13:47.676 --> 01:13:49.303 Of course I'm with Dave, stupid! 935 01:13:49.428 --> 01:13:52.348 - I need... Hey, you got a comment? - No. 936 01:13:53.933 --> 01:13:57.103 I need the extension from you guys because I don't have it. 937 01:13:57.812 --> 01:14:00.689 - Do you know where he went? - Yes, I do. 938 01:14:00.731 --> 01:14:02.650 I need a ride, though. 939 01:14:03.443 --> 01:14:05.946 - Okay. - Well, what you waiting for? 940 01:14:06.321 --> 01:14:07.406 Okay. 941 01:14:08.573 --> 01:14:10.283 Wait, wait, wait. 942 01:14:11.618 --> 01:14:13.286 Don't be shaking me. 943 01:14:13.328 --> 01:14:15.163 Sorry. I apologize. 944 01:14:15.288 --> 01:14:17.999 Don't be blowing on me! I don't know you that well! 945 01:14:18.041 --> 01:14:20.794 Slow down. Slow. Wait. Wait, wait. Wait, I said slow down now! 946 01:14:20.877 --> 01:14:22.379 Wait, it's dark in here. I'm in. 947 01:14:22.462 --> 01:14:25.924 Please, hurry. Dooley, where you going? 948 01:14:25.966 --> 01:14:27.718 Hey, Sarge, you got a little schmutz right here. 949 01:14:27.801 --> 01:14:29.094 Shut up! 950 01:14:32.431 --> 01:14:36.476 - How many tickets you got? - I've never been caught speeding. 951 01:14:36.518 --> 01:14:38.270 In New York. 952 01:14:38.353 --> 01:14:39.688 This year. 953 01:14:45.777 --> 01:14:47.821 Long live Nil. 954 01:14:48.363 --> 01:14:52.534 Sorry, Earth. Sometimes No. 2 happens! 955 01:14:54.327 --> 01:14:56.163 Captain! Thank goodness you're back. 956 01:14:56.246 --> 01:14:57.873 No. 2's become a raging lunatic. 957 01:14:57.956 --> 01:15:01.460 Not to worry, kind friend. I'm back, and I'm taking over. 958 01:15:04.629 --> 01:15:06.131 Welcome, Captain. 959 01:15:20.103 --> 01:15:21.229 Right Arm! 960 01:15:21.229 --> 01:15:24.816 - What the devil is this? - Someone's overriding the system! 961 01:15:24.900 --> 01:15:27.736 Only the Captain has the code to... 962 01:15:29.071 --> 01:15:30.614 The Captain! 963 01:15:55.973 --> 01:15:57.767 You are in my chair! 964 01:16:00.561 --> 01:16:01.854 Guards! 965 01:16:01.896 --> 01:16:05.024 - Put down your weapons. - Seize him! 966 01:16:05.108 --> 01:16:09.737 Guards, I said seize him! You've seen what a fool he's been! 967 01:16:09.779 --> 01:16:15.618 We all know I am the only one qualified to get us home. 968 01:16:17.870 --> 01:16:20.873 Is this what you want? This chaos? 969 01:16:24.627 --> 01:16:26.629 We choose our Captain. 970 01:16:28.548 --> 01:16:30.925 This planet rocks. Deal with it. 971 01:16:35.888 --> 01:16:37.724 Get out of my chair. 972 01:16:43.187 --> 01:16:44.689 Captain, the orb is in the water. 973 01:16:44.772 --> 01:16:48.359 The siphoning process is getting stronger by the minute. 974 01:16:53.865 --> 01:16:55.700 Right Arm, summon the orb. 975 01:16:55.742 --> 01:16:59.871 Captain, the fight drained our power below 1 %. 976 01:16:59.954 --> 01:17:04.667 I can re-route booster energy, but there won't be enough for take-off. 977 01:17:07.378 --> 01:17:10.506 Well, Captain, it seems you have a choice. 978 01:17:11.299 --> 01:17:14.594 Save this planet or save yourself. 979 01:17:16.095 --> 01:17:17.972 I choose this planet. 980 01:17:19.515 --> 01:17:21.642 And what of your beloved crew? 981 01:17:21.684 --> 01:17:25.021 Are you willing to condemn them to the same fate? 982 01:17:25.064 --> 01:17:28.567 Stranded here in a world of behemoths? 983 01:17:29.902 --> 01:17:32.863 I believe it is the right thing to do, 984 01:17:32.905 --> 01:17:36.075 but I cannot make this decision for all of you. 985 01:17:37.868 --> 01:17:40.079 I say we save Earth. 986 01:17:40.162 --> 01:17:41.705 And its moon. 987 01:17:43.874 --> 01:17:46.543 My life began on this planet. 988 01:17:46.668 --> 01:17:48.837 I no longer feel like No. 3. 989 01:17:51.090 --> 01:17:55.052 I am Dave Ming Chang. 990 01:17:55.094 --> 01:17:58.639 I have 443 new friends on MySpace 991 01:17:58.722 --> 01:18:03.143 and a JDate next week with a woman named Sheila Moskowitz. 992 01:18:03.227 --> 01:18:07.272 I am Dave Ming Chang. 993 01:18:08.065 --> 01:18:10.067 I am Dave Ming Chang. 994 01:18:10.150 --> 01:18:14.238 - I am Dave Ming Chang. - I am Dave Ming Chang. 995 01:18:14.279 --> 01:18:17.950 - I am Dave Ming Chang. - I am Dave Ming Chang. 996 01:18:18.033 --> 01:18:22.287 I am Johnny Dazzles, and I am fabulous! 997 01:18:23.956 --> 01:18:27.418 What? Not everybody has to be Dave Ming Chang. 998 01:18:29.420 --> 01:18:31.922 You've all gone completely mad! 999 01:18:32.005 --> 01:18:34.591 Take him and put him 1000 01:18:34.675 --> 01:18:36.260 in my butt. 1001 01:18:42.975 --> 01:18:46.061 Engineer, divert all remaining power to Right Arm. 1002 01:19:36.321 --> 01:19:38.865 - Way to go, Right Arm! - Yes! 1003 01:19:46.581 --> 01:19:48.166 Dave! Are you okay? 1004 01:19:48.166 --> 01:19:52.337 Dave! What is happening? How can we help you? 1005 01:19:52.378 --> 01:19:55.215 Thank you, but it is too late. 1006 01:19:55.298 --> 01:19:57.175 We are out of power. 1007 01:19:57.258 --> 01:20:00.970 We'll never get back now. It is over. 1008 01:20:01.054 --> 01:20:04.849 Hands behind your head! Understand? Step away from that thing! 1009 01:20:04.933 --> 01:20:07.268 - No! - Hey! Let us handle this, folks, okay? 1010 01:20:07.352 --> 01:20:09.312 You don't need your guns, all right? Don't hurt him! 1011 01:20:09.396 --> 01:20:10.939 We're not gonna hurt anybody. 1012 01:20:11.022 --> 01:20:12.982 - We're just gonna talk. - Dooley, enough! 1013 01:20:13.066 --> 01:20:15.860 You've seen what that thing can do. Hands behind your head! 1014 01:20:15.902 --> 01:20:18.696 Captain, with no shield and no power, 1015 01:20:18.738 --> 01:20:22.033 the projectile from his weapon will breach the hull. 1016 01:20:22.117 --> 01:20:23.785 We'll take casualties. 1017 01:20:23.868 --> 01:20:25.495 He can't move! He doesn't have any power left! 1018 01:20:25.578 --> 01:20:27.956 - Hands behind your head! - He can't move! 1019 01:20:28.039 --> 01:20:29.124 - Josh! - Kid! 1020 01:20:29.207 --> 01:20:30.625 Josh! 1021 01:20:40.051 --> 01:20:42.470 We have power. We have been saved. 1022 01:20:42.512 --> 01:20:44.305 All hail Josh the hero! 1023 01:20:49.854 --> 01:20:52.022 Stay right where you are! 1024 01:20:55.735 --> 01:20:59.572 Yeah, if you're trying to freak me out, it's not gonna work. 1025 01:21:02.199 --> 01:21:05.244 All right, that's gonna freak me out a little. Do you see that? 1026 01:21:05.286 --> 01:21:07.580 - I do. - Is that a guy? 1027 01:21:07.621 --> 01:21:09.165 - Looks like it. - Like a really little guy? 1028 01:21:09.290 --> 01:21:11.083 - Like a really little guy. - On his tongue? 1029 01:21:11.167 --> 01:21:13.252 What'd I just say? 1030 01:21:13.377 --> 01:21:15.713 - Hello. - You, you see that, right? 1031 01:21:15.755 --> 01:21:18.591 - There's a little guy in there? - He's talking. 1032 01:21:18.632 --> 01:21:21.052 - Yeah. - Dave. 1033 01:21:22.094 --> 01:21:24.764 I apologize to all of you. 1034 01:21:24.847 --> 01:21:28.434 It was my second-in-command who took control of my ship by force, 1035 01:21:28.517 --> 01:21:31.395 and it was he, not I, who performed these unspeakable acts of cruelty. 1036 01:21:31.437 --> 01:21:33.105 Will you put that thing down? Would you please? 1037 01:21:33.189 --> 01:21:37.443 I mean, the guy's an inch tall. You look like a wuss. Right? 1038 01:21:37.485 --> 01:21:41.572 Josh, my friend. You helped save two worlds today. 1039 01:21:42.531 --> 01:21:46.410 And you taught me the true meaning of friendship and courage. 1040 01:21:47.244 --> 01:21:50.164 Your father would have been proud of his young captain. 1041 01:21:50.164 --> 01:21:53.292 Promise me you'll always take pride in being different. 1042 01:21:53.876 --> 01:21:56.170 - I promise. - High-five. 1043 01:21:58.422 --> 01:22:01.008 Perhaps that's not such a great idea. 1044 01:22:05.429 --> 01:22:08.474 - Gina. - Yeah. Yeah, hi. 1045 01:22:08.557 --> 01:22:10.810 You're, you're really tiny. 1046 01:22:10.893 --> 01:22:12.311 And I should have known you were an alien, 1047 01:22:12.436 --> 01:22:14.397 because no straight man is that good a dancer. 1048 01:22:14.480 --> 01:22:19.318 I think I'm finally able to understand how your painting makes me feel. 1049 01:22:21.987 --> 01:22:23.489 I feel love. 1050 01:22:27.869 --> 01:22:31.623 - Okay, I guess she's not that fat. - Told you. 1051 01:22:34.167 --> 01:22:37.045 Hey! Hey, man! Hey, don't forget about me! 1052 01:22:37.838 --> 01:22:40.424 Yeah! I'm not trying to stay in here! 1053 01:22:41.758 --> 01:22:43.218 You squeezing my brain! 1054 01:22:43.260 --> 01:22:46.555 - You're gonna make it pop! Stop! - I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 1055 01:22:46.638 --> 01:22:48.682 Hey, slow down. I don't want you messing up my sexy. 1056 01:22:48.765 --> 01:22:52.185 Okay. Easy. Almost, almost, almost, almost. 1057 01:22:52.853 --> 01:22:53.895 Okay. 1058 01:22:58.066 --> 01:23:02.070 Hey! Yeah. Yeah, that, that look good. 1059 01:23:04.698 --> 01:23:06.700 Time for us to go home. 1060 01:23:08.160 --> 01:23:10.871 - I'll miss you, Dave. - And I you. 1061 01:23:11.663 --> 01:23:15.167 Remember, I'll never be that far away, 1062 01:23:17.002 --> 01:23:18.420 good friend. 1063 01:23:29.222 --> 01:23:31.099 A little room, please. 1064 01:23:51.328 --> 01:23:52.704 What? No! 1065 01:23:59.544 --> 01:24:00.837 Dave! 1066 01:24:08.513 --> 01:24:10.264 - FBI! - Out of the way! 1067 01:24:10.306 --> 01:24:11.933 Move, move, move! 1068 01:24:11.974 --> 01:24:14.185 - No! - Hey, what is going on? 1069 01:24:29.409 --> 01:24:30.910 Mom, look! 1070 01:24:36.624 --> 01:24:38.084 He's okay. 1071 01:24:54.809 --> 01:24:56.602 I didn't think we'd make it out of there. 1072 01:24:56.686 --> 01:24:59.480 Good thing you have such big feet, Captain. 1073 01:25:00.606 --> 01:25:03.067 We'll have much to explain when we return home. 1074 01:25:03.109 --> 01:25:05.737 We'll find another way to save Nil. 1075 01:25:05.820 --> 01:25:07.822 There are plenty of worlds out there for us to explore. 1076 01:25:07.905 --> 01:25:09.574 Yes, No. 3. 1077 01:25:09.657 --> 01:25:10.908 But what we learned on Earth 1078 01:25:10.992 --> 01:25:13.953 is more valuable than all the salt in the galaxy. 1079 01:25:14.036 --> 01:25:18.416 And when we do return, it looks like I'll be needing a new No. 2. 1080 01:25:18.499 --> 01:25:21.335 I think you'll be needing more than that. 1081 01:25:25.465 --> 01:25:28.342 Yeah, Captain! Get in there, Captain! 1082 01:25:49.405 --> 01:25:50.948 Cue the new anthem.