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["Bring The Pain" by Method Man plays]

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Official YIFY movies site:
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[announcer] <i>You understand?</i>

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<i>Right now, ladies and gentlemen,</i>
<i>it's showtime!</i>

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<i>♪ And now ladies and gentlemen</i>
<i>ladies-- ladies and gentlemen ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Pete Pete Pete Pete Davidson ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Pete-- Pete Davidson ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Ladies and gentlemen Pete ♪</i>

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Hello!

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What's up?

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<i>♪ Pete Davidson ♪</i>

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Thank you.

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Thank you very much.

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Thank you. Thank you.

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Okay.

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Very, very cool.
I need that more than you know.

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Hey, everyone. We are here tonight
to induct some of the greatest stand-ups

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of all time into a place of honor
we're calling The Hall.

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Yes.

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So welcome to the first ever
Stand-Up Comedy Hall of Fame

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Introduction Ceremony.
I am Pete Davidson.

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Yes.

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The guy who took the special
out of comedy special.

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So we're gonna kick off this event
honoring comics who passed away

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and I'm pretty sure it's because they're
betting, like, I might not be alive

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by the time this airs.

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Trust me, I think I'm a weird choice
to intro a Stand-Up Hall of Fame too.

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In the last few years,
I've been onstage less than

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the babies inside Ali Wong.

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Tonight, we are honoring true legends.

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Like Joan Rivers, who sparked... yeah.

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Yeah.

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It sparked a very fierce debate at Netflix
about which face we were going to use

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for her picture.

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Well...

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we landed on that one.

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Robin Williams, who is the-- yeah.

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The GOAT.

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He's also the literal opposite of me
in energy, talent, and body hair.

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George Carlin.

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The soothing-- yes.

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George Carlin.

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The soothing voice of the conductor
on <i>Thomas the Tank Engine.</i>

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And the guy who taught you
the word cocksucker.

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And of course, Richard Pryor.

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Right?

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Richard Pryor, he redefined comedy
despite tragically giving Chevy Chase

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the confidence to say the N word.

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It's a real thing. Google that.

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The class tonight is very special.

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The Hall did their research in picking
the four nominees, okay?

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They didn't just select comedians
that were young and trendy,

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in hopes of boosting viewership.

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For some reason, they think I'll do that.

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Our four inductees tonight were all
legitimately voted in

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by a board of agents, club owners,
managers, and other influential members

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of the comedy community.

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Which is a long-winded way of saying Jews.

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It's going to be a really fun night,
seriously.

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We've got Mix Master Mike
from The Beastie Boys deejaying.

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Fucking sick.

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Super tight.

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And lots of great alive comedians
to talk about the dead ones.

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Like we got Mulaney, Chappelle,
and Handler, yeah.

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You could only see together these people
in a really nice theater,

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or an even nicer rehab.

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The Hall is going to be a part
of the National Comedy Center

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in Jamestown, New York.

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Yeah, that's a real place.

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But tonight, thank God,
is not about me.

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It's about these legends that are finally
getting the respect they deserve

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on the same streaming platform
that airs <i>Is it Cake?</i>

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So let's enjoy a healthy mix
of laughter and crying.

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Like me when I masturbate.

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And now, come on, I had to have a few
little hey... zingers in there.

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Want to know something really funny?
I... I couldn't do...

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this is the weirdest sentence
I think I've ever said.

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I couldn't put makeup on for this
because I got a spray tan.

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Which I think is the weirdest thing
I've ever said.

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Ever. And I asked my--
I'd never gotten a spray tan before,

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I asked my boy, I was like...

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"Do I do my dick and ass?"

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Like, I don't know what
I'm supposed to do.

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Do I get one of those Borat fucking
Speedos? I had no idea.

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And my boy was like,

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"No, leave it white.
More impressive that way."

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And now, it's my honor to introduce
my friend, Jon Stewart, okay?

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Jon Stewart...

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was recently honored
with the Mark Twain award.

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And is such a consummate performer,
he's equally excited to be doing this.

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Jon Stewart, everyone!

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<i>♪ Jon... ♪</i>

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Ho!

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<i>♪ Jon, Jon Stewart ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Jon Stewart ♪</i>

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<i>♪ Jon, Jon, Jon ♪</i>

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Pete Davidson!

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<i>♪ Jon, Jon Stewart</i>
<i>Jon, Jon Stewart ♪</i>

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<i>-♪ Jon, Jon Stewart ♪</i>
-Thanks for being here!

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Thanks to Pete Davidson.
You know, there are not a lot of comics

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who can come right from a duck blind
to the show.

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And still kill.

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I'm here to induct someone
that I have great respect for.

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I had the pleasure of knowing
for a little bit.

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Mr. George Carlin.

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[applause]

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Let us begin.

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Shit.

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Piss.

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Fuck.

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[crowd cheers]

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Sorry, scroll up.

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Cunt.

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[small cheer from crowd]

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You don't hear enough applause for that.

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Cocksucker.

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[crowd cheers]

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I see where the crowd's at.

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Motherfucker.

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[crowd cheers loudly]

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You're going to love the last one.

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Tits.

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[crowd cheers]

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Piss has got some work to do.

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Cunt and tits are killing it.

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1972, George Carlin uttered
the seven words

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you cannot say on television.

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Shit, piss, cunt, fuck, cocksucker,
motherfucker, and tits.

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I was nine.

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And I fell in love.

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I didn't know any of it, what it meant,
but the tits bit...

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cheese tits.

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It was then that George Carlin
established himself

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as a counter-culture hero.

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But it wasn't just about saying the words.
He had a point to it.

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It was the absurdity
that these seven words

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carried power when they were just words.

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They weren't deeds. They weren't thoughts.

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They weren't bad intentions.
They were just words.

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George Carlin was arrested.
Lenny Bruce was arrested.

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They were sued. They were taken to court.
They were brought in...

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on charges for saying words.

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Ladies and gentlemen,
that was 50 years ago.

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Today, those would be the titles
of the next seven Netflix shows.

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That was his moment.

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You know, we're a fortunate group.

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Comedians.

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Even more rare is when a comedian
has a moment

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in the culture

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when the times somehow meet the talent.

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And there's an alchemy
that creates greatness.

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That was George Carlin in the 1970s.

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He was everything!

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But even more rare, almost unheard of,

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is a comedian who gives up
making a living on the road

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to try and become a legend of the time.

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And that's where George Carlin's courage
and bravery,

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and not enough is said about that.

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This cat started in the 1960s
wearing the sharkskin suit.

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And the thin tie,
and going on Merv Griffin.

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And doing the impressions.
And he was making a living.

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His wife, Brenda.
His young daughter, Kelly.

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He bought a house. They were making it.

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And he was empty.

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He wasn't himself.
He wasn't actualized as an artist.

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And so he fucking threw it all away.

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The idea that you would give up
the dream of making a living

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and supporting your family--
they put their house in escrow.

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Because he felt he wasn't being himself.
He grew a beard, he grew out his hair.

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And he threw on some jeans.

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And he started doing bits about
Muhammad Ali getting thrown

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to the wolves

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for not allowing himself to be drafted
into Vietnam.

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And the bit was basically...
Muhammad Ali beats people up

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for a living. And what he said was,

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"I'll beat people up,
but I don't wanna kill them."

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And the government said...

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"If you're not gonna kill them,

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we're not gonna let you
beat them up."

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He didn't give a shit.
He just went out there.

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He was an artist.

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[crowd cheers]

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I was fortunate enough in the '90s

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to become friendly with George.

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I finally got a chance to go out and spend
some time with him out in Los Angeles.

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I was going to interview him
for a special.

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He was celebrating 40 years in comedy.

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We were doing it in Aspen, Colorado.

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Because generally, the people that produce
comedy shows have the wisdom

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to take a guy
whose had four heart attacks,

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and have him perform
where there's very little oxygen.

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That's why I don't do the
"HBO Is A Joke Festival."

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I do the Netflix Is A Joke Special.

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[applause]

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Look at you people.

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Displaying brand loyalty.
That's very exciting.

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[Jon laughs]

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You know, in his later years,
everybody said Carlin got real dark.

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You know, he cheered for the demise
of the world. That he became nihilistic.

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But it wasn't that at all.
It was disappointment.

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I'd never been with somebody
who had such empathy

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for the human condition.

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And I think his material in later years
was just a reflection of the fact that

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he was fucking truly heartbroken

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about what we were doing to each other.
And what we were doing to ourselves.

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But the interesting thing to me was,

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for a counterculture hero
like George Carlin,

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he really was a blue collar worker.

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He'd go to his office at 9:00 a.m.,
and he'd sit and write.

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I mean, I've never met a person

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who smoked that much pot

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and worked that hard.

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He would write his jokes...

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and then, he would get out the weed,
or as he would say to me

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when I was sitting in his office,
"It's punch-up time."

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George Carlin died in 2008.

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2006 or 2007, Twitter was born.

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If you go on Twitter,
every now and again,

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George Carlin is trending.

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On a platform that he really didn't have
any idea what it was.

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But he'll just pop up randomly
when weird shit goes down in the world.

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Because as a culture, we miss his voice.

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And that, for a comedian,

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is the greatest honor you can give.

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[applause]

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We miss him.

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We miss his voice.

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We want to know what he would think.

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Comedy's ephemeral, man.
Almost nobody survives their moment.

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He survived five decades

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as a trenchant observer, an analyst,
an absurdist, and a comedian.

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And a friend, and a father,
and a husband.

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And a humanitarian.

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He was incredible.

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And I can't tell you how often
I miss him.

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And how much I think about him,
and how grateful I was for...

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even the little time that we had
to spend together.

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Ladies and gentlemen, George Carlin.

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[applause]

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[Carlin] George Carlin.

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And George Carlin.

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I used to be this guy.

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Or maybe this guy used to be me.

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I don't know. We were each other
at one time.

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We have more ways to describe dirty words
than we actually have dirty words.

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That seems a little strange to me.

248
00:15:52.242 --> 00:15:56.413
It seems to indicate that somebody
was awfully interested in these words.

249
00:15:56.497 --> 00:16:02.169
They kept referring to them.
They called them bad words, dirty.

250
00:16:02.795 --> 00:16:06.340
Filthy. Foul. Vile. Vulgar.

251
00:16:06.882 --> 00:16:07.967
Coarse.

252
00:16:09.134 --> 00:16:11.720
In poor taste. Unseemly.

253
00:16:11.804 --> 00:16:17.101
Street talk. Gutter talk.
Locker room language. Barracks talk.

254
00:16:18.018 --> 00:16:21.105
Bawdy. Naughty. Saucy. Raunchy.

255
00:16:21.188 --> 00:16:25.818
Rude. Crude. Lewd. Lascivious.
Indecent. Profane. Obscene.

256
00:16:25.901 --> 00:16:27.778
Blue. Off color.

257
00:16:28.612 --> 00:16:29.780
Risqué.

258
00:16:30.322 --> 00:16:32.282
Suggestive.

259
00:16:32.658 --> 00:16:34.368
Cursing. Cussing. Swearing.

260
00:16:34.451 --> 00:16:36.954
All I could think of was
shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker,

261
00:16:37.037 --> 00:16:38.330
motherfucker, and tits!

262
00:16:38.414 --> 00:16:39.832
[crowd cheers]

263
00:16:40.708 --> 00:16:42.751
"Take a shit" is another one.

264
00:16:44.503 --> 00:16:45.671
Take a shit?

265
00:16:46.422 --> 00:16:49.049
You don't take a shit, you leave a shit.

266
00:16:50.634 --> 00:16:52.469
That's the whole idea!

267
00:16:53.178 --> 00:16:54.138
To leave it!

268
00:16:59.226 --> 00:17:03.355
Germs. Where did this sudden fear
of germs come from in this country?

269
00:17:03.439 --> 00:17:04.648
Have you noticed this?

270
00:17:04.732 --> 00:17:08.444
The media constantly running stories
about all the latest infections.

271
00:17:08.527 --> 00:17:11.780
Salmonella, E. Coli, Hantavirus,
Bird Flu.

272
00:17:11.864 --> 00:17:15.617
And Americans, they panic easily,
so now, everybody's running around

273
00:17:15.701 --> 00:17:17.244
scrubbing this and spraying that.

274
00:17:17.327 --> 00:17:19.997
And overcooking their food.
Repeatedly washing their hands

275
00:17:20.080 --> 00:17:22.499
trying to avoid all contact with germs.

276
00:17:22.583 --> 00:17:25.919
It's ridiculous, and it goes
to ridiculous lengths.

277
00:17:26.003 --> 00:17:29.506
In prisons, before they give you
a lethal injection,

278
00:17:29.590 --> 00:17:31.800
they swab your arm with alcohol.

279
00:17:32.718 --> 00:17:35.095
Did you ever belch, and almost puke?

280
00:17:40.392 --> 00:17:42.686
I never fucked a ten.

281
00:17:42.770 --> 00:17:44.521
Never fucked a ten!

282
00:17:44.605 --> 00:17:47.900
But one night, I fucked five two's.

283
00:17:48.734 --> 00:17:49.651
Yeah.

284
00:17:50.819 --> 00:17:52.946
Here's something you never hear a man say,

285
00:17:53.030 --> 00:17:55.699
"Stop sucking my dick
or I'll call the police."

286
00:17:59.620 --> 00:18:01.789
They wonder why there's no blue food.

287
00:18:05.334 --> 00:18:08.754
Haven't we gone a little overboard
with these colored ribbons

288
00:18:08.837 --> 00:18:10.005
for different causes?

289
00:18:10.089 --> 00:18:12.132
Every cause has its own
colored ribbon now.

290
00:18:12.216 --> 00:18:14.760
Red for AIDS. Blue for child abuse.
Pink for breast cancer.

291
00:18:14.843 --> 00:18:17.054
Green for the rainforest.
Purple for urban violence.

292
00:18:17.137 --> 00:18:20.349
I got a brown one. Know what it means?
Eat shit, motherfucker!

293
00:18:20.432 --> 00:18:22.643
Eat shit, motherfucker!

294
00:18:22.726 --> 00:18:25.979
But in the bullshit department,
in the bullshit department,

295
00:18:26.063 --> 00:18:29.858
a businessman can't hold a candle
to a clergyman.

296
00:18:29.942 --> 00:18:33.320
'Cause I got to tell you the truth, folks.
I got to tell you the truth.

297
00:18:33.403 --> 00:18:35.114
When it comes to bullshit,

298
00:18:35.531 --> 00:18:41.286
big time, major league bullshit,
you have to stand in awe,

299
00:18:41.995 --> 00:18:45.624
in awe of the all-time champion
of false promises

300
00:18:45.707 --> 00:18:49.545
and exaggerated claims, religion.
No contest.

301
00:18:49.878 --> 00:18:51.672
No contest.

302
00:18:52.923 --> 00:18:56.343
Religion. Religion easily has

303
00:18:56.426 --> 00:18:59.555
the greatest bullshit story ever told.

304
00:18:59.638 --> 00:19:04.226
Think about it.
Religion has actually convinced people

305
00:19:04.768 --> 00:19:06.687
that there's an invisible man

306
00:19:07.563 --> 00:19:09.148
living in the sky.

307
00:19:09.231 --> 00:19:13.026
Who watches everything you do,
every minute of every day.

308
00:19:13.110 --> 00:19:18.699
And the invisible man has a special list
of ten things he does not want you to do.

309
00:19:19.324 --> 00:19:22.953
And if you do any of these ten things,
he has a special place

310
00:19:23.036 --> 00:19:26.748
full of fire, and smoke, and burning,
and torture, and anguish,

311
00:19:26.832 --> 00:19:30.294
where he will send you to live,
and suffer, and burn, and choke,

312
00:19:30.377 --> 00:19:34.339
and scream, and cry forever and ever
till the end of time.

313
00:19:35.257 --> 00:19:36.758
But he loves you.

314
00:19:43.599 --> 00:19:44.725
He loves you.

315
00:19:48.145 --> 00:19:51.356
He loves you, and he needs money!

316
00:19:52.566 --> 00:19:55.027
He always needs money!

317
00:19:55.110 --> 00:19:58.405
He's all powerful, all perfect,
all knowing, and all wise,

318
00:19:58.488 --> 00:20:01.366
somehow, just can't handle money.

319
00:20:03.243 --> 00:20:08.207
Religion takes in billions of dollars.
They pay no taxes.

320
00:20:08.290 --> 00:20:10.500
And they always need a little more.

321
00:20:10.584 --> 00:20:13.795
Now, you talk
about a good bullshit story.

322
00:20:13.879 --> 00:20:16.048
Holy shit.

323
00:20:17.341 --> 00:20:22.054
But I would like to bring you up to date
on the "Comedians Health Sweepstakes."

324
00:20:23.263 --> 00:20:27.726
As it stands right now,
I lead Richard Pryor in heart attacks

325
00:20:27.809 --> 00:20:28.936
two to one.

326
00:20:29.561 --> 00:20:31.355
I'm ahead. I am ahead.

327
00:20:31.772 --> 00:20:33.523
That's right. Now...

328
00:20:34.358 --> 00:20:39.279
However, Richard still leads me
one to nothing on burning yourself up.

329
00:20:43.659 --> 00:20:46.870
Well, the way it happened was,
first Richard had a heart attack.

330
00:20:46.954 --> 00:20:48.622
Then, I had a heart attack.

331
00:20:48.705 --> 00:20:50.540
Then, Richard burned himself up.

332
00:20:50.624 --> 00:20:54.127
Then, I said, fuck that,
I'm going to have another heart attack.

333
00:20:56.046 --> 00:20:58.131
Why? Why?

334
00:20:58.674 --> 00:21:04.972
Why? Why? Why is it that most of the
people who are against abortion

335
00:21:05.055 --> 00:21:08.475
are people you wouldn't want to fuck
in the first place?

336
00:21:11.228 --> 00:21:14.690
I'm a modern man.
A man for the millennium.

337
00:21:14.773 --> 00:21:16.108
Digital and smoke-free.

338
00:21:16.191 --> 00:21:19.236
A diversified, multicultural,
postmodern deconstructionist

339
00:21:19.319 --> 00:21:22.197
politically, anatomically,
and ecologically incorrect.

340
00:21:22.281 --> 00:21:25.200
I got a personal trainer,
a personal shopper, a personal assistant,

341
00:21:25.284 --> 00:21:26.785
and a personal agenda.

342
00:21:26.868 --> 00:21:29.579
You can't shut me up.
You can't dumb me down.

343
00:21:29.663 --> 00:21:31.498
Because I'm tireless,
and I'm wireless.

344
00:21:31.581 --> 00:21:33.667
I'm an alpha male on beta-blockers.

345
00:21:34.960 --> 00:21:38.880
I'm a nonbeliever, and an overachiever.
Laid back, but fashion forward.

346
00:21:38.964 --> 00:21:41.425
Upfront, down home, low rent,
high maintenance.

347
00:21:41.508 --> 00:21:44.094
Super-sized, long-lasting,
high-definition, fast-acting,

348
00:21:44.177 --> 00:21:45.595
oven-ready, and built to last.

349
00:21:45.679 --> 00:21:47.723
I'm a hands-on, footloose,
knee-jerk head case.

350
00:21:47.806 --> 00:21:50.309
Prematurely post-traumatic,
and I have a love child

351
00:21:50.392 --> 00:21:51.518
who sends me hate mail.

352
00:21:52.019 --> 00:21:55.022
A fully equipped, factory authorized,
hospital tested, clinically proven,

353
00:21:55.105 --> 00:21:57.065
scientifically formulated medical miracle.

354
00:21:57.149 --> 00:21:59.985
I've been prewashed, precooked,
preheated, prescreened, preapproved,

355
00:22:00.068 --> 00:22:02.904
prepackaged, postdated, freeze dried,
double wrapped, vacuum packed,

356
00:22:02.988 --> 00:22:05.782
and I have an unlimited
broadband capacity.

357
00:22:05.866 --> 00:22:08.035
[applause]

358
00:22:13.957 --> 00:22:17.377
I'm a rude dude, but I'm the real deal.
Lean and mean.

359
00:22:17.461 --> 00:22:20.797
Cocked, locked, and ready to rock.
Rough, tough, and hard to bluff.

360
00:22:20.881 --> 00:22:23.425
I take it slow. I go with the flow.
I ride with the tide.

361
00:22:23.508 --> 00:22:24.968
I got glide in my stride.

362
00:22:25.052 --> 00:22:27.763
Driving and moving,
sailing and spinning, jiving and grooving,

363
00:22:27.846 --> 00:22:30.390
whaling and winning.
I don't snooze, so I don't lose.

364
00:22:30.474 --> 00:22:32.851
I keep the pedal to the metal,
and the rubber on the road.

365
00:22:32.934 --> 00:22:35.562
I party hearty,
and lunchtime is crunch time.

366
00:22:35.645 --> 00:22:40.442
I'm hanging in, there ain't no doubt.
And I'm hanging tough, over and out.

367
00:22:40.525 --> 00:22:41.777
[applause]

368
00:22:42.569 --> 00:22:44.821
[applause]

369
00:22:57.042 --> 00:23:01.296
It's my privilege to induct George Carlin
into The Hall.

370
00:23:03.090 --> 00:23:05.592
♪♪

371
00:23:10.555 --> 00:23:14.059
And now, ladies and gentlemen,
I want to introduce our next...

372
00:23:14.684 --> 00:23:18.939
I don't know what you call the people
that induct better people into The Hall.

373
00:23:19.397 --> 00:23:20.732
The next one of me.

374
00:23:22.109 --> 00:23:24.986
He's one of my favorite comedians
and people.

375
00:23:25.070 --> 00:23:27.114
Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. John Mulaney.

376
00:23:27.197 --> 00:23:29.991
-[DJ scratching]
-[applause]

377
00:23:31.660 --> 00:23:33.203
<i>♪ John Mulaney ♪</i>

378
00:23:34.287 --> 00:23:35.831
<i>♪ John Mulaney ♪</i>

379
00:23:35.914 --> 00:23:37.290
<i>♪ John Mulaney ♪</i>

380
00:23:37.874 --> 00:23:38.917
Hey!

381
00:23:40.293 --> 00:23:41.461
- ♪ <i>John ♪</i>
-Hello.

382
00:23:41.545 --> 00:23:43.380
<i>♪ John Mulaney ♪</i>

383
00:23:43.797 --> 00:23:46.967
Thank you, Jon. Hello, everyone.
My name's John Mulaney.

384
00:23:47.467 --> 00:23:48.802
[crowd cheers]

385
00:23:48.885 --> 00:23:50.679
It's a pleasure to be here.

386
00:23:50.762 --> 00:23:52.389
Robin Williams.

387
00:23:52.472 --> 00:23:55.725
His career spanned about 38 years.

388
00:23:56.059 --> 00:23:59.563
But creatively, he packed in
a few centuries.

389
00:24:00.063 --> 00:24:03.275
Here's what, to me,
separates Robin Williams

390
00:24:03.358 --> 00:24:04.860
from every other comedian.

391
00:24:05.277 --> 00:24:09.447
There is no footage of Robin Williams
phoning it in.

392
00:24:10.073 --> 00:24:14.911
There exists no recorded moment
when he wasn't giving his all.

393
00:24:14.995 --> 00:24:17.914
Whether he was onstage
at the Holy City Zoo,

394
00:24:17.998 --> 00:24:19.583
at the Comedy Store,

395
00:24:19.666 --> 00:24:22.460
at the Metropolitan Opera House
in New York.

396
00:24:22.544 --> 00:24:26.965
Whether he was onstage co-hosting
<i>Comic Relief </i>for years and years.

397
00:24:27.048 --> 00:24:31.595
Making hundreds of millions of dollars
for medical care for the homeless.

398
00:24:31.678 --> 00:24:34.723
No matter what stage he was on,
yes, give it up for that.

399
00:24:34.806 --> 00:24:37.851
[applause]

400
00:24:37.934 --> 00:24:41.730
No matter what stage he was on,
he seemed to be immersing himself

401
00:24:41.813 --> 00:24:45.275
completely in the performance,
and he seemed to love it totally.

402
00:24:45.358 --> 00:24:47.736
Robin Williams was also
in more good movies

403
00:24:47.819 --> 00:24:50.405
than any human being
should be allowed to be in.

404
00:24:51.323 --> 00:24:54.868
I watched <i>Good Morning, Vietnam</i>
a couple months ago.

405
00:24:54.951 --> 00:25:00.123
And go back and watch that movie.
Watch the first classroom scene

406
00:25:00.207 --> 00:25:02.584
in that movie when Robin
is teaching English

407
00:25:02.667 --> 00:25:04.002
to the people in Saigon.

408
00:25:04.085 --> 00:25:07.422
I've never seen a performance
where someone is funnier,

409
00:25:07.505 --> 00:25:11.551
and also laughing that genuinely
with people in a scene.

410
00:25:11.635 --> 00:25:14.679
It feels like you're watching
this brilliant rehearsal.

411
00:25:14.763 --> 00:25:18.350
He's great even in mediocre movies.

412
00:25:18.433 --> 00:25:21.269
Remember that movie <i>Nine Months</i>
with Hugh Grant?

413
00:25:21.519 --> 00:25:25.398
Whatever. It's fine. It's all right.
It's not great. It's not great.

414
00:25:27.067 --> 00:25:29.694
But they know that.
Robin Williams...

415
00:25:30.320 --> 00:25:32.113
is in it for 15 minutes.

416
00:25:32.197 --> 00:25:35.825
And he's funnier than most people's
entire body of work.

417
00:25:35.909 --> 00:25:38.161
He plays a Russian OB-GYN.

418
00:25:38.245 --> 00:25:42.040
In one scene, who used to be
the head of obstetrics

419
00:25:42.123 --> 00:25:45.669
at a hospital in St. Petersburg
for animals.

420
00:25:45.752 --> 00:25:48.588
And he specialized in rats and monkeys.

421
00:25:49.214 --> 00:25:52.801
And he says to Hugh Grant
and Julianne Moore, he goes,

422
00:25:52.884 --> 00:25:56.596
"After awhile, I figured you've seen
one rat ass, you've seen them all."

423
00:25:56.680 --> 00:25:59.641
But then, that's a very funny part,
but then he goes,

424
00:25:59.724 --> 00:26:02.143
he says this with such dignity.

425
00:26:02.227 --> 00:26:06.398
Such quiet understatement.
He goes, "And last month I received

426
00:26:06.481 --> 00:26:10.277
my new license.
And now, I can deliver human babies."

427
00:26:11.736 --> 00:26:15.657
If you want to see an actor
simultaneously elevate

428
00:26:15.740 --> 00:26:18.702
what a comedic performance
could be emotionally,

429
00:26:18.785 --> 00:26:21.913
and what an emotional performance
could be comedically,

430
00:26:21.997 --> 00:26:25.000
watch Robin Williams
in a movie called <i>The Fisher King.</i>

431
00:26:25.083 --> 00:26:30.297
It is the best work on film
any comic actor has ever done.

432
00:26:31.881 --> 00:26:35.135
Here's an idea that I hear a lot.

433
00:26:35.427 --> 00:26:40.974
Where people like to theorize
that comedy all comes from a place

434
00:26:41.057 --> 00:26:43.226
of pain, and sadness.

435
00:26:43.310 --> 00:26:47.647
And people like to talk about comedians
as if we do what we do

436
00:26:47.731 --> 00:26:49.649
because of some inner darkness.

437
00:26:49.733 --> 00:26:54.237
And this is especially thrown around
when discussing Robin Williams.

438
00:26:54.321 --> 00:26:58.325
And with all due respect,
fuck off with that shit.

439
00:26:58.408 --> 00:26:59.701
Like...

440
00:27:01.202 --> 00:27:04.873
have a little respect
for a brilliant artist

441
00:27:04.956 --> 00:27:07.500
who was just more talented
than you.

442
00:27:08.335 --> 00:27:10.211
That's what was happening.

443
00:27:11.338 --> 00:27:14.466
Making people laugh is incredibly fun.

444
00:27:14.549 --> 00:27:16.968
The art form of comedy
is a joy to perform.

445
00:27:17.052 --> 00:27:21.264
And being a comedian
is not a psychiatric condition.

446
00:27:21.723 --> 00:27:25.101
Are many of us also very fucked up,
myself included?

447
00:27:25.602 --> 00:27:28.271
Yes! But... whatever.

448
00:27:28.355 --> 00:27:32.400
You know, there are depressed people
who don't even have the decency

449
00:27:32.484 --> 00:27:33.860
to be great comedians.

450
00:27:35.195 --> 00:27:37.489
Why don't you pick on them
for a change?

451
00:27:43.453 --> 00:27:47.582
I was talking to Robin's daughter, Zelda,
about this.

452
00:27:47.665 --> 00:27:51.628
She wrote something back to me
that I wanted to read tonight.

453
00:27:51.711 --> 00:27:52.921
If you don't mind.

454
00:27:53.004 --> 00:27:55.215
This is from Robin's daughter, Zelda.

455
00:27:55.298 --> 00:27:57.884
Talking about this idea, she said,

456
00:27:58.301 --> 00:28:02.514
"This is just one person's perception
of a much more complex man.

457
00:28:02.597 --> 00:28:06.142
But in my eyes,
so much of what Dad wanted to do

458
00:28:06.226 --> 00:28:08.103
was to brighten people's lives.

459
00:28:08.186 --> 00:28:11.022
Especially those he thought
may need it the most.

460
00:28:11.106 --> 00:28:14.901
In that way, I think his drive
had much less to do with his own sadness,

461
00:28:14.984 --> 00:28:17.445
and much more to do
with lifting the world's.

462
00:28:17.529 --> 00:28:20.698
He'd go to homeless shelters
and sit alone with them for hours.

463
00:28:20.782 --> 00:28:24.244
He rode in triathlons
for challenged athletes foundations.

464
00:28:24.327 --> 00:28:27.664
And he would make all the other folks
laugh on the long journey.

465
00:28:27.747 --> 00:28:30.208
He went to hospitals.
He went to army bases.

466
00:28:30.291 --> 00:28:32.419
To anywhere laughter was needed.

467
00:28:32.502 --> 00:28:34.921
He loved knowing that
at the darkest moments,

468
00:28:35.004 --> 00:28:38.425
laughter really is the most incredible
salve for the soul.

469
00:28:38.508 --> 00:28:42.470
And it remains, in my eyes,
one of the hardest, most precious gifts

470
00:28:42.554 --> 00:28:44.389
a human can give another.

471
00:28:44.806 --> 00:28:48.643
My dad truly was happiest
when he was making others happy.

472
00:28:48.727 --> 00:28:49.769
Always."

473
00:28:50.478 --> 00:28:51.438
Well...

474
00:28:51.521 --> 00:28:53.565
[applause]

475
00:28:59.154 --> 00:29:02.824
And what more could you say
about a comedian or a person?

476
00:29:02.907 --> 00:29:04.909
Ladies and gentlemen, Robin Williams.

477
00:29:04.993 --> 00:29:06.536
[applause]

478
00:29:08.872 --> 00:29:13.084
Is there someone here tonight that feels
the need to be healed by comedy?

479
00:29:13.168 --> 00:29:14.085
Is there anyone here?

480
00:29:15.378 --> 00:29:16.463
Look!

481
00:29:16.880 --> 00:29:19.716
The moon, like a testicle,
hangs low in the sky.

482
00:29:22.302 --> 00:29:24.929
What sound or noise do you love?

483
00:29:26.097 --> 00:29:27.390
[fart noise]

484
00:29:27.474 --> 00:29:28.600
[laughter]

485
00:29:32.479 --> 00:29:34.105
Is there a deaf signer here?

486
00:29:34.189 --> 00:29:36.065
Oh, how cool is that?

487
00:29:38.067 --> 00:29:39.194
Blow me.

488
00:29:42.363 --> 00:29:43.406
Thank you.

489
00:29:43.907 --> 00:29:46.951
I guess I should talk for a moment
about the very serious subject of...

490
00:29:47.035 --> 00:29:49.704
schizophrenia. No, he doesn't.
Shut up, let him talk!

491
00:29:50.371 --> 00:29:53.291
My son is three years old.
It's an amazing time.

492
00:29:53.374 --> 00:29:55.543
It's like big head, little tiny body.

493
00:29:55.794 --> 00:29:58.922
It's an outrageous time when they ask you
about everything. It's like...

494
00:29:59.005 --> 00:30:02.175
"Why is the sky blue?"
"Well, because of the atmosphere."

495
00:30:02.258 --> 00:30:04.928
"Why is there atmosphere?"
"Well, because we need to breathe."

496
00:30:05.011 --> 00:30:07.972
"Why do we breathe?"
"Why the fuck do you want to know?"

497
00:30:08.807 --> 00:30:10.141
I always have this dream.

498
00:30:10.225 --> 00:30:12.644
I have this dream, well,
like I guess every father.

499
00:30:12.727 --> 00:30:15.146
You have a dream that maybe one day,

500
00:30:15.814 --> 00:30:18.775
one day it'll be my son
accepting the Nobel prize.

501
00:30:19.317 --> 00:30:21.694
I also have another dream
where it's my son going,

502
00:30:21.778 --> 00:30:23.363
"You want fries with this?"

503
00:30:24.197 --> 00:30:26.282
I was on this German talk show,
this woman said to me,

504
00:30:26.366 --> 00:30:29.118
she said, "Mr. Williams,
why do you think there's not so much

505
00:30:29.202 --> 00:30:30.703
comedy in Germany?"

506
00:30:30.787 --> 00:30:34.123
I said, "Did you ever think
you killed all the funny people?"

507
00:30:35.416 --> 00:30:37.335
But if you're Irish,
you'll kick my ass,

508
00:30:37.418 --> 00:30:39.796
but then you'll fucking
sing about it afterwards.

509
00:30:40.255 --> 00:30:42.549
<i>♪ Oh, the night you said</i>
<i>My wife was fat ♪</i>

510
00:30:42.632 --> 00:30:44.092
<i>♪ I knocked you down</i>
<i>And shit in your hat ♪</i>

511
00:30:44.175 --> 00:30:47.303
<i>♪ Away the time we go with it</i>
<i>Coming away for air ♪</i>

512
00:30:47.387 --> 00:30:48.304
<i>♪ Moving... ♪</i>

513
00:30:48.388 --> 00:30:51.266
Here's my idea for a fucking sport.

514
00:30:52.016 --> 00:30:54.269
I knock a ball in a gopher hole.

515
00:30:55.478 --> 00:30:57.897
"Oh, you mean like pool."
Fuck off, pool.

516
00:30:58.273 --> 00:31:01.526
Not with a straight stick.
With a little fucked-up stick.

517
00:31:02.694 --> 00:31:05.363
I whack the ball.
It goes in a gopher hole.

518
00:31:06.155 --> 00:31:09.200
"You mean like croquet."
Fuck croquet!

519
00:31:10.201 --> 00:31:13.037
I put the hole hundreds of yards away.

520
00:31:13.997 --> 00:31:15.957
Fuck off, yeah.

521
00:31:16.040 --> 00:31:17.876
Whacking away, and each time you miss,

522
00:31:17.959 --> 00:31:20.503
you feel like you're going
to have a stroke. [chuckles]

523
00:31:20.587 --> 00:31:22.797
Fuck! That's what we'll call it!

524
00:31:22.881 --> 00:31:26.885
A stroke. Because every time you miss,
you feel like you're going to fucking die.

525
00:31:27.427 --> 00:31:30.805
I want the guy who does Mexican soccer
to do golf one time.

526
00:31:33.516 --> 00:31:36.019
The ball is rolling.
The ball is going to the...

527
00:31:36.769 --> 00:31:42.734
Hole!

528
00:31:44.152 --> 00:31:47.113
Girls, if you want to get
that lovely tattoo of the sunrise

529
00:31:47.196 --> 00:31:49.824
rising out of your ass crack,
gorgeous when you're 20.

530
00:31:49.908 --> 00:31:53.077
But when you're 50, it's an octopus
chasing a fucking starfish.

531
00:31:54.621 --> 00:31:55.788
So, no.

532
00:31:58.583 --> 00:31:59.709
[shouts]

533
00:32:00.960 --> 00:32:01.961
Fuck!

534
00:32:03.338 --> 00:32:04.172
Peeing!

535
00:32:05.256 --> 00:32:06.674
And then, you realize...

536
00:32:07.342 --> 00:32:10.470
that God gave you a penis
and a brain.

537
00:32:11.638 --> 00:32:14.474
And only enough blood to run one
at a time.

538
00:32:18.478 --> 00:32:20.939
[imitating John Wayne] That's right,
Corky. It's time to saddle up.

539
00:32:21.022 --> 00:32:22.982
We're heading south of the border.

540
00:32:23.691 --> 00:32:25.318
You got to please Missy.

541
00:32:26.069 --> 00:32:28.112
[normal voice] I have one question
for the ladies.

542
00:32:28.488 --> 00:32:29.864
Do we look like this?

543
00:32:32.951 --> 00:32:36.120
[laughter and applause]

544
00:33:20.832 --> 00:33:22.709
[raucous laughter]

545
00:33:24.627 --> 00:33:26.212
Are you almost there?

546
00:33:27.547 --> 00:33:29.799
No, no, no. I will finish.

547
00:33:30.967 --> 00:33:32.927
No, no. No, I love you.

548
00:33:34.470 --> 00:33:36.055
I love you.

549
00:33:36.889 --> 00:33:38.307
I will finish.

550
00:33:39.100 --> 00:33:43.604
Look, I said I can take it.
I just can't feel my face.

551
00:33:44.814 --> 00:33:46.274
No, who's your daddy?

552
00:33:47.567 --> 00:33:49.944
I love you. I love you.

553
00:33:50.319 --> 00:33:51.946
I'll finish. I'll finish.

554
00:33:52.989 --> 00:33:54.407
I'll finish...

555
00:33:56.367 --> 00:33:58.119
[snores]

556
00:34:05.501 --> 00:34:06.586
Good night!

557
00:34:07.128 --> 00:34:08.629
[applause]

558
00:34:13.468 --> 00:34:14.594
Yep.

559
00:34:16.554 --> 00:34:20.808
It is an honor to induct Robin Williams
into The Hall. Yes.

560
00:34:20.892 --> 00:34:24.353
♪♪

561
00:34:28.524 --> 00:34:33.029
And this is a real delight
to bring up your next presenter.

562
00:34:33.112 --> 00:34:36.908
A comedian that I love watching
and a person that I love running into,

563
00:34:36.991 --> 00:34:39.494
who I haven't been able to see
in some time.

564
00:34:39.577 --> 00:34:41.871
Ladies and gentlemen,
please welcome the very funny

565
00:34:41.954 --> 00:34:44.290
and wonderful Miss Chelsea Handler.

566
00:34:45.708 --> 00:34:49.253
<i>♪Chel Chel Chelsea</i>
<i>Chel Chel Chelsea ♪</i>

567
00:34:49.337 --> 00:34:51.756
<i>♪ Chel Chel Chel Chelsea ♪</i>

568
00:34:52.423 --> 00:34:54.550
-<i>♪ Chelsea ♪</i>
-Yeah!

569
00:34:54.634 --> 00:34:59.055
<i>♪ Chelsea Chelsea Chelsea.</i>
<i>Chel, Chelsea ♪</i>

570
00:34:59.138 --> 00:35:00.431
- <i>♪ Chelsea ♪</i>
-Hi, everybody!

571
00:35:00.515 --> 00:35:03.392
<i>-♪ Handler ♪</i>
-Hi!

572
00:35:03.476 --> 00:35:04.685
[applause]

573
00:35:05.895 --> 00:35:08.481
Thank you so much. Thank you.

574
00:35:08.564 --> 00:35:11.776
I'm here to talk about Mrs. Joan Rivers.

575
00:35:11.859 --> 00:35:13.319
[applause]

576
00:35:15.780 --> 00:35:20.034
The first time I met Joan Rivers
we were both on E.

577
00:35:20.118 --> 00:35:21.744
And not the fun kind.

578
00:35:24.497 --> 00:35:27.834
I was too young, too confident,
and too arrogant

579
00:35:27.917 --> 00:35:32.046
to believe anyone had a hand
in my success but myself.

580
00:35:32.380 --> 00:35:35.591
Now, I know that
for every success I've had,

581
00:35:35.675 --> 00:35:40.221
it was because someone came before me
who was bolder, and braver,

582
00:35:40.304 --> 00:35:45.309
and good luck finding someone as bold
and as brave as Joan Rivers.

583
00:35:45.393 --> 00:35:46.769
[applause]

584
00:35:52.233 --> 00:35:56.154
She once said, "Stevie Wonder,
that poor son of a bitch.

585
00:36:00.533 --> 00:36:05.454
Who's going to tell him he's wearing
a macramé plant holder on his head?"

586
00:36:08.541 --> 00:36:10.877
And of course, there were the classics.

587
00:36:11.460 --> 00:36:16.549
She also said, "Elizabeth Taylor
is so fat she puts mayonnaise on aspirin."

588
00:36:19.552 --> 00:36:23.389
So I am humbled
to stand up here tonight

589
00:36:23.472 --> 00:36:27.143
and pay homage to her life,
and to her work.

590
00:36:27.727 --> 00:36:32.857
Joan was born in 1933
as Joan Alexandra Molinsky.

591
00:36:32.940 --> 00:36:36.527
She was born in Brooklyn, New York.
She started out as many of us did,

592
00:36:36.611 --> 00:36:38.821
working odd jobs to make ends meet.

593
00:36:38.905 --> 00:36:41.824
She was a tour guide
at Rockefeller Center.

594
00:36:41.908 --> 00:36:45.286
She worked as a proofreader
at a New York ad agency.

595
00:36:45.369 --> 00:36:49.207
And she also worked for a brief time
as a fashion consultant,

596
00:36:49.290 --> 00:36:52.835
a skill that would come in handy
decades later

597
00:36:52.919 --> 00:36:56.464
when she formed the <i>Fashion Police</i>
with her daughter, Melissa.

598
00:37:01.636 --> 00:37:05.264
They invented eye rolls
and celebrity smackdowns

599
00:37:05.348 --> 00:37:07.850
decades before Jada and Will.

600
00:37:15.107 --> 00:37:18.778
Joan soon found her home onstage
making people laugh.

601
00:37:18.861 --> 00:37:21.739
Laughing at celebrities,
laughing at politics,

602
00:37:21.822 --> 00:37:24.242
and mostly laughing at herself.

603
00:37:24.325 --> 00:37:28.037
She launched her stand-up career
at clubs in Greenwich Village.

604
00:37:28.120 --> 00:37:32.208
Sharing bills with the likes
of George Carlin and Richard Pryor.

605
00:37:32.291 --> 00:37:35.211
Joan's routine at the time closed
with the punchline

606
00:37:35.294 --> 00:37:37.463
"I'm Joan Rivers, and I put out."

607
00:37:39.340 --> 00:37:42.301
I think that's a pretty strong opener
as well.

608
00:37:43.302 --> 00:37:47.265
And then, after almost a decade
of struggling in dingy clubs,

609
00:37:47.348 --> 00:37:52.144
Joan became an overnight sensation.
After being rejected multiple times,

610
00:37:52.228 --> 00:37:55.564
she was booked on <i>The Tonight Show</i>
<i>Starring Johnny Carson.</i>

611
00:37:55.648 --> 00:37:57.316
[applause]

612
00:37:59.819 --> 00:38:04.657
It was February 17th, 1965.
And that night changed everything.

613
00:38:04.740 --> 00:38:08.995
Johnny Carson sat there wiping tears
of laughter from his cheeks,

614
00:38:09.078 --> 00:38:12.707
and he said, "God, you're funny.
You're going to be a star."

615
00:38:12.790 --> 00:38:14.250
And he was right.

616
00:38:14.333 --> 00:38:15.960
[applause]

617
00:38:20.172 --> 00:38:23.676
She was in command,
and Johnny, the King of Late Night,

618
00:38:23.759 --> 00:38:25.803
was clearly in awe.

619
00:38:25.886 --> 00:38:29.015
She was showing us that you could enter
the boy's club,

620
00:38:29.098 --> 00:38:32.643
and not only leave them laughing,
but if you were funny enough,

621
00:38:32.727 --> 00:38:34.186
you could dominate them.

622
00:38:34.270 --> 00:38:36.814
[cheers and applause]

623
00:38:38.774 --> 00:38:43.321
Joan played Carnegie Hall.
She won a Grammy. She won an Emmy.

624
00:38:43.404 --> 00:38:47.366
She earned a Tony nomination.
She wrote 12 best-selling books.

625
00:38:47.450 --> 00:38:50.536
She redefined the red carpet
as we know it today.

626
00:38:50.619 --> 00:38:54.123
And most impressively,
she wasn't afraid to be herself.

627
00:38:54.540 --> 00:38:57.835
Joan found her own acerbic
and trailblazing voice

628
00:38:57.918 --> 00:39:00.004
at a time when women did not speak out.

629
00:39:00.629 --> 00:39:03.632
And when a lot of people get famous,
they become safer.

630
00:39:03.716 --> 00:39:05.009
And more guarded.

631
00:39:05.092 --> 00:39:07.428
Because suddenly,
there's too much to lose.

632
00:39:07.511 --> 00:39:09.889
But not Joan.
The more successful she became,

633
00:39:09.972 --> 00:39:12.975
the louder, and the more unapologetic
she was.

634
00:39:13.059 --> 00:39:16.562
She pushed boundaries,
and she put everything on the line

635
00:39:16.645 --> 00:39:17.980
for a laugh.

636
00:39:18.064 --> 00:39:20.274
She was criticized her whole life

637
00:39:20.358 --> 00:39:24.779
for being too abrasive, too gossipy,
too personal.

638
00:39:25.404 --> 00:39:29.200
But there was always something deeper
under the surface of her jokes.

639
00:39:29.283 --> 00:39:33.954
She refused to apologize for anything,
saying, "Part of my act

640
00:39:34.038 --> 00:39:35.998
is meant to shake you up.

641
00:39:36.624 --> 00:39:40.795
It looks like I'm being funny,
but I'm reminding you of other things.

642
00:39:40.878 --> 00:39:43.756
Life is tough, darling.
Life is hard.

643
00:39:43.839 --> 00:39:45.758
And we better laugh at everything,

644
00:39:45.841 --> 00:39:48.344
otherwise we're going straight
down the tube."

645
00:39:48.427 --> 00:39:49.804
[applause]

646
00:39:54.016 --> 00:39:56.560
And she didn't just love
making people laugh.

647
00:39:56.644 --> 00:39:59.230
She loved people
who made other people laugh.

648
00:39:59.563 --> 00:40:03.526
She once said, "If one more female
comedian comes up to me and says,

649
00:40:03.609 --> 00:40:06.570
'You opened the doors for me,'
I want to say 'Fuck you.

650
00:40:06.654 --> 00:40:08.864
I'm still opening the doors for you.'"

651
00:40:08.948 --> 00:40:10.950
[cheers and applause]

652
00:40:12.952 --> 00:40:14.495
And she still is.

653
00:40:14.578 --> 00:40:17.498
Not even her death in 2014
could stop her,

654
00:40:17.581 --> 00:40:21.252
thanks to her legacy,
she is still opening doors

655
00:40:21.335 --> 00:40:24.630
for women from some big red carpet
in the sky.

656
00:40:26.257 --> 00:40:28.676
Ladies and gentlemen, Joan Rivers!

657
00:40:29.802 --> 00:40:31.512
[applause]

658
00:40:32.388 --> 00:40:35.683
This business, it's all about
casting couches.

659
00:40:35.766 --> 00:40:38.477
I just want you to know,
my name is Joan Rivers,

660
00:40:38.561 --> 00:40:39.770
and I put out.

661
00:40:39.854 --> 00:40:43.899
My wedding night was a disaster
because I have zero-zero.

662
00:40:45.025 --> 00:40:47.403
My husband said,
"Let me help you with the buttons."

663
00:40:47.486 --> 00:40:48.821
And I said...

664
00:40:49.321 --> 00:40:51.323
[laughter]

665
00:40:54.994 --> 00:40:56.745
I said, "I'm naked!"

666
00:40:57.788 --> 00:41:00.958
When you're not wanted,
you know from the beginning.

667
00:41:01.041 --> 00:41:02.585
All I ever heard growing up is,

668
00:41:02.668 --> 00:41:04.462
"Why can't you be like
your cousin Sheila?

669
00:41:04.545 --> 00:41:06.714
Why can't you be like
your cousin Sheila?"

670
00:41:06.797 --> 00:41:09.675
Sheila had died at birth.
Oh, yes!

671
00:41:10.718 --> 00:41:14.305
First wives were too good.
We worry, the hair grows gray.

672
00:41:14.388 --> 00:41:16.390
Husband has a heart condition,
we're upset.

673
00:41:16.474 --> 00:41:19.435
We pawn our rings to buy him a pacemaker.
Anything, right?

674
00:41:19.518 --> 00:41:21.437
Second wife, the husband's got
a heart condition,

675
00:41:21.520 --> 00:41:23.355
she's walking behind him going,
"Boo!"

676
00:41:23.439 --> 00:41:25.399
That's the difference.

677
00:41:26.066 --> 00:41:27.276
That's the difference!

678
00:41:27.359 --> 00:41:29.153
Also cremated my mother-in-law.

679
00:41:29.236 --> 00:41:31.947
And it was, oh, to cremate
your mother-in-law,

680
00:41:32.031 --> 00:41:34.158
you don't know.
You should never know this.

681
00:41:34.241 --> 00:41:36.702
I was flying,
and I took the plane directly,

682
00:41:36.785 --> 00:41:38.579
Montreal, London,
London, Montreal.

683
00:41:38.662 --> 00:41:41.624
I'm flying back, I thought,
I should have waited till she was dead.

684
00:41:41.707 --> 00:41:43.667
And I was just...

685
00:41:44.335 --> 00:41:46.253
Kissing on the first date,
that wasn't allowed.

686
00:41:46.337 --> 00:41:47.713
-[Joan] Are you kidding?
-That secluded?

687
00:41:47.796 --> 00:41:50.799
-Edgar and I still haven't started.
-[Carson] I didn't know that.

688
00:41:50.883 --> 00:41:54.595
If my husband didn't toss and turn in
his sleep, I wouldn't have had the kids.

689
00:41:54.678 --> 00:41:56.722
[laughter and applause]

690
00:42:00.559 --> 00:42:01.685
You know, right?

691
00:42:04.480 --> 00:42:07.107
I can come home from work
with lipstick on my collar,

692
00:42:07.191 --> 00:42:08.484
he couldn't care less.

693
00:42:08.567 --> 00:42:11.695
I pretend I had an affair.
You want to talk about getting him crazy?

694
00:42:11.779 --> 00:42:13.781
I thought, "This will get him insane."
Right?

695
00:42:13.864 --> 00:42:16.116
We're lying in bed,
I'm pretending I'm talking in my sleep,

696
00:42:16.200 --> 00:42:19.203
and I'm saying things like,
"No, Tim, it's not right!"

697
00:42:19.828 --> 00:42:23.707
"No, Tim, it's not right.
My God, it's just not right."

698
00:42:23.791 --> 00:42:27.503
Next morning, my husband left me a note:
"Tell Tim it's all right."

699
00:42:28.671 --> 00:42:32.758
We all go through the same thing at 40,
you begin to lose your eyesight.

700
00:42:32.841 --> 00:42:35.344
I don't care who you are.
You can't read the birthday card.

701
00:42:35.427 --> 00:42:38.973
At 50, the memory starts to go.
"Let's go see that movie.

702
00:42:39.056 --> 00:42:41.350
You know the one.
You know what I'm getting..."

703
00:42:41.433 --> 00:42:44.603
At 60, you start to fart.
You just fart, fart, fart, fart, fart.

704
00:42:44.687 --> 00:42:48.399
Yes. And at 70,
you lose your sense of smell.

705
00:42:48.482 --> 00:42:51.819
So between 60 and 70,
it is a terrible time.

706
00:42:51.902 --> 00:42:52.945
Oh!

707
00:42:53.028 --> 00:42:56.282
[Joan] <i>Everyone watched the </i>Carson Show.

708
00:42:56.365 --> 00:42:59.118
<i>And when Carson said to me,</i>
<i>"You're going to be a star,"</i>

709
00:42:59.201 --> 00:43:01.620
my life changed.

710
00:43:01.704 --> 00:43:03.998
I'm very sentimental.
Look at the dedication in the book.

711
00:43:04.081 --> 00:43:05.708
-[Carson] I know, it's very sweet of you.
-Yeah.

712
00:43:05.791 --> 00:43:06.834
It was very sweet of you.

713
00:43:06.917 --> 00:43:09.003
-You talk about sentiment...
-You didn't have to do that.

714
00:43:09.086 --> 00:43:09.920
It's to...

715
00:43:10.004 --> 00:43:13.591
It says, talks about your baby.
Then you have a dedication.

716
00:43:13.674 --> 00:43:14.675
-Can I read it?
-[Joan] Sure.

717
00:43:14.758 --> 00:43:16.802
-It says, "To Edgar," your husband.
-[Joan] Had to do that.

718
00:43:16.885 --> 00:43:19.888
"Who made this book happen.
Who made this book happen.

719
00:43:19.972 --> 00:43:21.557
To Johnny Carson,
who made it all happen."

720
00:43:21.640 --> 00:43:23.767
That's very sweet of you. That's nice.

721
00:43:24.310 --> 00:43:27.187
[Joan] <i>Fox came and offered me</i>
<i>my own show.</i>

722
00:43:27.271 --> 00:43:29.523
<i>And Edgar would be the producer.</i>

723
00:43:29.607 --> 00:43:31.191
<i>Of course we said yes.</i>

724
00:43:32.401 --> 00:43:35.529
<i>After 20 years on </i>The Tonight Show,

725
00:43:37.072 --> 00:43:39.575
<i>the first person I called</i>
<i>was Johnny Carson.</i>

726
00:43:40.075 --> 00:43:43.495
He slammed the phone down.
Called him again, slammed it down again.

727
00:43:43.579 --> 00:43:47.541
And never spoke to me again. Ever.

728
00:43:47.625 --> 00:43:49.835
Monica Lewinsky, is she here?

729
00:43:50.794 --> 00:43:53.339
Look under your chairs.
Monica, my idol!

730
00:43:54.423 --> 00:43:57.301
This girl has seven million dollars

731
00:43:57.384 --> 00:44:00.179
from having oral sex
with the President of the United States.

732
00:44:00.262 --> 00:44:01.972
Do you understand what I'm telling you,
Canada?

733
00:44:02.056 --> 00:44:04.016
Seven million dollars!

734
00:44:04.099 --> 00:44:05.726
Doesn't that upset you?

735
00:44:06.060 --> 00:44:07.978
If I could do it again...

736
00:44:08.729 --> 00:44:11.482
If I could do it again,
I would say to my daughter,

737
00:44:11.565 --> 00:44:14.485
when she was 16, "Melissa,
come in the den, bring a banana.

738
00:44:14.568 --> 00:44:16.945
Get on your knees.
Mama wants to talk to you."

739
00:44:17.363 --> 00:44:19.907
Sometimes, I say to them, "Staff!"

740
00:44:21.450 --> 00:44:22.743
"I'm lonely.

741
00:44:24.119 --> 00:44:26.163
Who's going to fuck me tonight, staff?"

742
00:44:27.164 --> 00:44:28.791
Oh, I'm staring at you.

743
00:44:30.668 --> 00:44:32.878
Look at the person.
Don't look at me.

744
00:44:33.337 --> 00:44:36.507
Look at the person.
This is not fucking hard.

745
00:44:36.590 --> 00:44:38.258
Look at the person.

746
00:44:38.801 --> 00:44:42.179
We're going to say it three times.
This is what life is about.

747
00:44:42.262 --> 00:44:45.516
One, I'm so glad.
Come on, guys.

748
00:44:46.433 --> 00:44:48.102
I'm so glad.

749
00:44:48.644 --> 00:44:50.229
I'm so glad.

750
00:44:50.688 --> 00:44:53.982
I'm so glad... I'm not you.

751
00:44:54.066 --> 00:44:57.444
Thank you and good night!
A pleasure working with you.

752
00:44:58.529 --> 00:45:00.781
That's the funniest woman
in the world.

753
00:45:00.864 --> 00:45:03.033
And we'll be back after this message.

754
00:45:03.826 --> 00:45:08.372
[Joan] <i>But there's an importance for me</i>
<i>for this type of event for comedy</i>

755
00:45:08.455 --> 00:45:10.290
because I'm always left out of it.

756
00:45:10.582 --> 00:45:14.837
So for me, this is nice to be included.
Because I'm usually not included.

757
00:45:18.757 --> 00:45:23.637
[cheering and applauding]

758
00:45:28.392 --> 00:45:32.104
Well, Joan, you might have put out,
but tonight we're going to put you in.

759
00:45:32.187 --> 00:45:35.941
It is my great honor to induct you
into The Hall.

760
00:45:36.024 --> 00:45:40.737
♪♪

761
00:45:45.075 --> 00:45:49.455
And it's my pleasure to introduce
the roast master himself,

762
00:45:49.538 --> 00:45:52.332
a man who is a good friend
to every comedian

763
00:45:52.416 --> 00:45:53.667
that he's ever met.

764
00:45:53.750 --> 00:45:55.627
Please welcome Jeff Ross.

765
00:45:56.295 --> 00:45:59.465
♪♪

766
00:46:00.966 --> 00:46:02.384
<i>♪ The roast master ♪</i>

767
00:46:03.302 --> 00:46:06.680
<i>♪ The roast, the roast master ♪</i>

768
00:46:06.763 --> 00:46:08.932
How about a hand for Chelsea, everybody.

769
00:46:09.016 --> 00:46:13.604
<i>♪ Jeff Ross</i>
<i>Jeff Jeff Ross ♪</i>

770
00:46:13.687 --> 00:46:16.064
Whoo! Hello, comedy world!
How are you doing?

771
00:46:16.148 --> 00:46:17.733
[crowd cheers]

772
00:46:18.525 --> 00:46:22.154
I am here to present tonight's
in memoriam segment.

773
00:46:22.237 --> 00:46:27.075
Because recently, comedy has lost
Norm Macdonald,

774
00:46:27.159 --> 00:46:29.703
Louie Anderson, Bob Saget,

775
00:46:30.078 --> 00:46:32.831
Gilbert Gottfried, and Will Smith.

776
00:46:38.086 --> 00:46:40.589
Any Gilbert Gottfried fans here tonight?

777
00:46:40.672 --> 00:46:42.382
[crowd cheers]

778
00:46:44.551 --> 00:46:46.220
I loved Gilbert.

779
00:46:46.762 --> 00:46:51.141
I did get to see Gilbert in the hospital
right before he passed away.

780
00:46:51.225 --> 00:46:54.770
I'm glad I got the chance to thank him
for being my pal.

781
00:46:54.853 --> 00:46:57.481
And I held his hand,
and I said goodbye.

782
00:46:57.564 --> 00:47:01.652
It was hard for the doctors
to pronounce an exact time of death.

783
00:47:01.735 --> 00:47:04.947
Because Gilbert's eyes were always
kind of closed.

784
00:47:11.245 --> 00:47:15.249
I was doing a show for Netflix
where I roast historical figures.

785
00:47:15.332 --> 00:47:18.961
And I called Gilbert's agent,
and I said, "I need Gilbert to come out

786
00:47:19.044 --> 00:47:21.713
to LA and play Adolf Hitler."

787
00:47:23.924 --> 00:47:28.095
And his agent said, "No way.
It's not appropriate.

788
00:47:28.178 --> 00:47:32.307
Gilbert's first time on Netflix
is not going to be playing Adolf Hitler."

789
00:47:33.475 --> 00:47:35.852
So I called Gil myself, and I said,

790
00:47:35.936 --> 00:47:38.814
"Gilbert, I need someone
to play Adolf Hit--"

791
00:47:38.897 --> 00:47:41.149
And he went, "Ler?

792
00:47:42.192 --> 00:47:43.277
I'll do it!"

793
00:47:46.822 --> 00:47:49.199
And he flew out.
We sent him into wardrobe.

794
00:47:49.283 --> 00:47:52.286
And Gilbert came to rehearsal
with a <i>lederhosen,</i>

795
00:47:52.369 --> 00:47:57.374
and a Hitler mustache,
and a swastika armband.

796
00:47:57.958 --> 00:47:59.167
Then, we broke for lunch,

797
00:47:59.251 --> 00:48:02.170
and Gilbert was still wearing
the swastika armband.

798
00:48:02.254 --> 00:48:04.172
And we did the show.

799
00:48:05.090 --> 00:48:07.050
We went to the after-party,
and I couldn't get him

800
00:48:07.134 --> 00:48:09.344
to take the swastika armband off.

801
00:48:11.763 --> 00:48:14.474
I think he wore it on the plane home
the next day.

802
00:48:16.101 --> 00:48:19.104
But he was so funny that night.
And let me tell you something.

803
00:48:19.187 --> 00:48:22.566
Gilbert Gottfried was the best
Hitler ever.

804
00:48:24.026 --> 00:48:29.281
Mel Brooks once said that comedy
is revenge through ridicule.

805
00:48:29.364 --> 00:48:34.703
What better way to mock the Nazis
then have their <i>führer </i>played by

806
00:48:34.786 --> 00:48:37.956
the loudest, most obnoxious Jew
in history.

807
00:48:38.040 --> 00:48:40.417
So... <i>Heil </i>Gilbert!

808
00:48:45.047 --> 00:48:47.341
Any Louie Anderson fans here?

809
00:48:47.424 --> 00:48:49.092
[crowd cheers]

810
00:48:50.802 --> 00:48:52.971
What an original voice in comedy.

811
00:48:53.055 --> 00:48:57.100
Louie Anderson turned his childhood
pain into concert tours,

812
00:48:57.184 --> 00:49:02.105
TV specials, and animated shows.
And he made it all hilarious.

813
00:49:02.189 --> 00:49:06.485
Louie gave us a way in to look,
and laugh at our own childhoods.

814
00:49:07.194 --> 00:49:10.197
He was also a recent Emmy winner,
a best-selling author,

815
00:49:10.280 --> 00:49:12.115
a hit game show host,

816
00:49:12.199 --> 00:49:15.160
and a spokesman for Land-O-Lakes butter.

817
00:49:16.161 --> 00:49:18.622
Both officially and unofficially.

818
00:49:20.957 --> 00:49:26.254
The first time I met Louie Anderson,
we were both standing at adjoining urinals

819
00:49:26.338 --> 00:49:28.924
in a men's room at a comedy club
in New York.

820
00:49:29.007 --> 00:49:31.551
I was 24-year-old open micer,

821
00:49:31.635 --> 00:49:34.763
and I'm pretty sure Louie
propositioned me.

822
00:49:35.555 --> 00:49:40.352
And I'm not going to spill secrets here,
but let's just say,

823
00:49:40.435 --> 00:49:42.521
I've been a huge fan ever since.

824
00:49:43.855 --> 00:49:46.191
We're so lucky Louie shared his life
with us.

825
00:49:46.274 --> 00:49:48.694
Life without Lilly won't be the same.

826
00:49:48.777 --> 00:49:50.529
Long live Lilly Anderson.

827
00:49:50.612 --> 00:49:52.489
[applause]

828
00:49:56.910 --> 00:50:00.163
I know we got some Norm Macdonald fans
here tonight.

829
00:50:00.247 --> 00:50:01.790
[crowd cheers]

830
00:50:04.668 --> 00:50:08.588
Norm had so many jokes
that I think about all the time.

831
00:50:08.672 --> 00:50:11.216
Whenever daylight savings time
rolled around,

832
00:50:11.299 --> 00:50:14.678
Norm would always say,
"I give it six months."

833
00:50:17.139 --> 00:50:20.726
Norm got fired from <i>Saturday Night Live</i>
for making too many jokes

834
00:50:20.809 --> 00:50:22.144
about O.J. Simpson.

835
00:50:23.353 --> 00:50:26.106
But comedians are supposed
to tell the truth

836
00:50:26.189 --> 00:50:28.358
no matter what the consequences.

837
00:50:28.442 --> 00:50:30.652
And that's what Norm did.

838
00:50:30.736 --> 00:50:33.905
I just wish he'd told us the truth
about his health.

839
00:50:33.989 --> 00:50:37.159
We all would have been able to tell him
how much we loved him.

840
00:50:37.659 --> 00:50:39.703
But that wasn't Norm's way.

841
00:50:39.786 --> 00:50:43.081
He was always one step ahead of us
right up until the end.

842
00:50:44.082 --> 00:50:45.500
I'm going to miss that guy.

843
00:50:46.543 --> 00:50:48.503
Where are my Bob Saget fans?

844
00:50:48.587 --> 00:50:50.338
[crowd cheers]

845
00:50:57.304 --> 00:50:58.972
Bob was like my brother.

846
00:50:59.055 --> 00:51:00.682
But he was America's dad.

847
00:51:00.766 --> 00:51:02.434
Like Bill Cosby.

848
00:51:04.811 --> 00:51:08.106
Except Bob put people to sleep
the old-fashioned way.

849
00:51:10.275 --> 00:51:12.652
By talking about his charity work.

850
00:51:15.030 --> 00:51:18.033
Bob's wife, John Stamos,
told me about how...

851
00:51:19.826 --> 00:51:22.704
how fans would stop Bob
all the time.

852
00:51:22.788 --> 00:51:24.080
They'd want to hug him.

853
00:51:24.164 --> 00:51:27.000
They'd get emotional,
and they'd say things to Bob like,

854
00:51:27.083 --> 00:51:31.338
"I didn't... I grew up without a dad,
and your character on <i>Full House,</i>

855
00:51:31.421 --> 00:51:34.508
Danny Tanner, he was like my dad,
so thank you."

856
00:51:34.966 --> 00:51:37.844
And in his honor,
please donate if you can

857
00:51:37.928 --> 00:51:40.263
to the Scleroderma Research Foundation.

858
00:51:40.347 --> 00:51:43.391
A cause that meant so much to Bob.

859
00:51:43.975 --> 00:51:47.562
Bob was so strong, and so supportive
when life got hard.

860
00:51:48.188 --> 00:51:51.316
I hope everyone here
has a friend like Bob.

861
00:51:52.317 --> 00:51:57.239
He was this gigantic TV star,
but he lived his life like a comedian.

862
00:51:57.572 --> 00:52:02.118
He even died like a comic
on the road, alone, in a hotel room.

863
00:52:02.953 --> 00:52:04.955
He slipped and hit his head.

864
00:52:05.705 --> 00:52:10.752
Which is kind of poetic for a guy
who hosted <i>America's Funniest Home Videos.</i>

865
00:52:20.387 --> 00:52:23.974
If Bob were here, he'd be like,
"Can I use that? That's good."

866
00:52:25.976 --> 00:52:27.936
[crowd cheers]

867
00:52:29.563 --> 00:52:30.522
Thanks.

868
00:52:31.398 --> 00:52:32.941
[applause]

869
00:52:35.902 --> 00:52:38.780
These four future Hall of Famers
may be gone,

870
00:52:38.864 --> 00:52:40.407
but their laughs live on.

871
00:52:40.490 --> 00:52:45.579
So let's all give it up one last time
for Gilbert, Louie, Norm, and Bob.

872
00:52:46.204 --> 00:52:47.956
[cheers and applause]

873
00:52:55.297 --> 00:52:56.506
Whoo!

874
00:52:57.090 --> 00:53:01.261
And now, it is my great honor
to welcome "The Closer,"

875
00:53:01.344 --> 00:53:03.388
Dave Chappelle!

876
00:53:03.471 --> 00:53:06.308
♪♪

877
00:53:06.391 --> 00:53:07.767
<i>♪ The Closer ♪</i>

878
00:53:09.060 --> 00:53:11.396
<i>♪ The... The Closer ♪</i>

879
00:53:13.690 --> 00:53:16.443
<i>♪ The Closer</i>
<i>Dave Dave Dave Chappelle ♪</i>

880
00:53:16.526 --> 00:53:19.738
<i>♪ Dave Dave Chappelle ♪</i>

881
00:53:19.821 --> 00:53:23.116
<i>♪ Dave Dave Dave ♪</i>

882
00:53:23.199 --> 00:53:27.579
<i>♪ Dave Dave Chappelle ♪</i>

883
00:53:27.662 --> 00:53:30.081
<i>♪ Dave Dave Chappelle ♪</i>

884
00:53:30.582 --> 00:53:31.958
Oh, boy.

885
00:53:33.084 --> 00:53:34.294
Thanks for being here.

886
00:53:34.377 --> 00:53:37.047
I don't know how you get to be
in this audience,

887
00:53:37.130 --> 00:53:38.965
but you lucky motherfuckers.

888
00:53:39.674 --> 00:53:41.885
-[man 1] Dave!
-[man 2] We love you, Dave!

889
00:53:41.968 --> 00:53:43.303
Hey, thanks, buddy.

890
00:53:44.137 --> 00:53:48.892
I love you too, in a very impersonal,
heterosexual kind of way.

891
00:53:53.980 --> 00:53:57.192
I got a heavy lift tonight because
it's my honor to get to...

892
00:53:57.651 --> 00:53:58.944
to induct the GOAT.

893
00:53:59.945 --> 00:54:02.030
[cheers and applause]

894
00:54:04.950 --> 00:54:05.992
Richard Pryor.

895
00:54:07.243 --> 00:54:08.578
Richard Pryor.

896
00:54:08.662 --> 00:54:10.372
[cheers and applause]

897
00:54:11.831 --> 00:54:16.252
The greatest stand-up comedian
that ever lived.

898
00:54:19.005 --> 00:54:24.219
Not to make it personal,
but comedians love Richard Pryor.

899
00:54:24.302 --> 00:54:28.056
There's a story that we always revel in
of him walking off stage

900
00:54:28.139 --> 00:54:30.475
in Las Vegas in the middle of a show.

901
00:54:30.850 --> 00:54:31.977
And when he did it,

902
00:54:32.686 --> 00:54:36.064
whoever promoted the show told him
he'd never work in Vegas again.

903
00:54:36.147 --> 00:54:37.273
And he said, "I don't care."

904
00:54:37.357 --> 00:54:40.527
He said, "If you said I'd never fuck
in Vegas again, I'd be worried."

905
00:54:46.658 --> 00:54:50.120
Abruptly, he left show business
and went into the unknown

906
00:54:50.203 --> 00:54:53.415
of what his future might be.
And it took him to San Francisco.

907
00:54:53.498 --> 00:54:56.668
And with the help of Paul Mooney,
and some other people,

908
00:54:56.751 --> 00:55:02.132
he started doing all-Black rooms,
and slowly but surely,

909
00:55:02.215 --> 00:55:05.760
he became the Richard Pryor
that we've come to love.

910
00:55:05.844 --> 00:55:09.514
It wasn't just Black rooms that he was
doing that made that transformation.

911
00:55:09.597 --> 00:55:10.932
It was cocaine.

912
00:55:16.896 --> 00:55:19.858
Sometimes, I'll see a comedian
have a great joke, and I'll say,

913
00:55:19.941 --> 00:55:21.359
"Man, I wish I wrote that joke."

914
00:55:21.443 --> 00:55:23.445
But the joke will be
about something personal.

915
00:55:23.528 --> 00:55:26.406
I know that that person lived
through something very difficult

916
00:55:26.489 --> 00:55:29.993
to be able to say something that funny
about their own life.

917
00:55:30.076 --> 00:55:32.078
Richard Pryor was like that.

918
00:55:32.162 --> 00:55:34.080
When I was 19, I remember,

919
00:55:34.706 --> 00:55:38.334
I did an event that he attended
at the Apollo Theater in Harlem.

920
00:55:38.418 --> 00:55:40.545
And I came in as he was coming in.

921
00:55:41.296 --> 00:55:43.006
They were wheeling him
in a wheelchair.

922
00:55:43.089 --> 00:55:45.341
I was standing behind him.
I didn't say one word to him.

923
00:55:45.425 --> 00:55:47.218
But I looked behind his ear.

924
00:55:47.302 --> 00:55:51.389
And I could see the scars
from when he burnt himself.

925
00:55:52.348 --> 00:55:53.975
And it made me want to cry.

926
00:55:55.018 --> 00:55:57.645
Not long after that,
I opened for him.

927
00:55:57.729 --> 00:56:00.356
At Newark Symphony Hall.

928
00:56:00.940 --> 00:56:04.360
I couldn't believe that he was a legend
doing a gig in Newark.

929
00:56:07.739 --> 00:56:09.407
I met him backstage.

930
00:56:09.699 --> 00:56:12.160
He remembered my name,
shook my hand.

931
00:56:12.702 --> 00:56:17.082
And he came out to the eeriest song.
It was a song called "I'm Calling You."

932
00:56:17.665 --> 00:56:20.376
And he did about 15 minutes.

933
00:56:20.877 --> 00:56:22.587
And he stopped talking.

934
00:56:22.670 --> 00:56:25.924
And he told the crowd, "I'm sorry.
I just can't do this tonight."

935
00:56:26.716 --> 00:56:30.386
And you could have heard a pin drop
in that room.

936
00:56:30.970 --> 00:56:32.931
And a guy in the back stood up

937
00:56:33.431 --> 00:56:37.644
and screamed out like he wanted to fight.
He said, "I love you, Richard!"

938
00:56:38.937 --> 00:56:40.522
The whole crowd went crazy.

939
00:56:41.064 --> 00:56:44.484
I mean, this was sincerely the longest
ovation I've ever seen

940
00:56:44.567 --> 00:56:47.278
to this day in comedy.
And I was a young man,

941
00:56:47.362 --> 00:56:50.782
but I understood that I was witnessing
actual love.

942
00:56:51.282 --> 00:56:54.869
That it didn't matter if he did good or
bad, they just wanted to be around him

943
00:56:54.953 --> 00:56:56.079
one more time.

944
00:56:56.162 --> 00:56:59.582
And they sent him off lovely.
And said a great goodbye.

945
00:56:59.874 --> 00:57:03.628
And the moment that I saw that,
it informed the rest of my career.

946
00:57:03.711 --> 00:57:06.756
I knew that's exactly what I wanted
for my life.

947
00:57:06.840 --> 00:57:08.967
And that's exactly how I want
my career to end.

948
00:57:09.050 --> 00:57:10.426
Well, maybe not exactly.

949
00:57:12.470 --> 00:57:13.680
Not in Newark.

950
00:57:22.480 --> 00:57:25.316
Paul Mooney was a big influence
on me as well.

951
00:57:25.400 --> 00:57:27.402
And...

952
00:57:27.485 --> 00:57:29.571
[cheers and applause]

953
00:57:31.906 --> 00:57:34.701
And he used to regale me
with stories of Richard.

954
00:57:34.784 --> 00:57:38.705
And the way he talked about Richard
was like he was in the next room.

955
00:57:39.122 --> 00:57:41.541
You know what I mean?
It was something very familiar

956
00:57:41.624 --> 00:57:46.463
and comforting hearing a guy
talk about his friend that way.

957
00:57:46.546 --> 00:57:49.507
I was very lucky
to get to know him too.

958
00:57:49.591 --> 00:57:52.760
I don't want to blather
about my own personal stories, but...

959
00:57:52.844 --> 00:57:55.096
I just want to say that
without Richard Pryor

960
00:57:55.180 --> 00:57:58.099
there would be no,
there would be no Dave Chappelle.

961
00:57:58.183 --> 00:58:02.187
And all you comedians out there
who complain that you can't say anything

962
00:58:02.270 --> 00:58:06.357
nowadays, I would suggest that perhaps,
you have nothing to say.

963
00:58:06.441 --> 00:58:09.527
Because there's a very profound example
of a person

964
00:58:09.611 --> 00:58:12.155
who said anything and everything
he wanted to say

965
00:58:12.238 --> 00:58:13.656
outside of context.

966
00:58:13.740 --> 00:58:16.367
There was only three channels
when that nigga was working.

967
00:58:24.292 --> 00:58:26.044
There's nothing to be afraid of.

968
00:58:26.127 --> 00:58:28.421
If you saw a person be this courageous

969
00:58:28.505 --> 00:58:31.758
at such a high price.
So please, ladies and gentlemen,

970
00:58:32.884 --> 00:58:34.844
make some noise for Richard Pryor.

971
00:58:35.345 --> 00:58:37.305
[cheers and applause]

972
00:58:40.642 --> 00:58:43.561
Now you know, I have read that
you were born in a brothel.

973
00:58:43.645 --> 00:58:46.147
And I figured this is Pryor
putting on an interviewer.

974
00:58:46.231 --> 00:58:48.733
No, I was born in my mother's womb.

975
00:58:48.816 --> 00:58:49.776
[Dick] Well, yes.

976
00:58:49.859 --> 00:58:52.862
And we lived in--
I guess you'd call it a brothel.

977
00:58:52.946 --> 00:58:55.490
-We called it a whorehouse.
-[Dick] Yeah.

978
00:58:56.449 --> 00:58:57.659
Whorehouse or...

979
00:59:00.036 --> 00:59:01.871
-Or--
-But it was home to me!

980
00:59:01.955 --> 00:59:03.414
It was... [laughs]

981
00:59:06.626 --> 00:59:08.795
I remember tricks used to come
through our neighborhood.

982
00:59:08.878 --> 00:59:10.713
That's where I first met white people.

983
00:59:10.797 --> 00:59:13.675
They come down through our neighborhood
to help the economy.

984
00:59:14.592 --> 00:59:17.512
Nice white dudes, though.
Because I could have been a bigot.

985
00:59:17.595 --> 00:59:18.846
You know what I mean?

986
00:59:19.472 --> 00:59:21.182
I could have been prejudiced.

987
00:59:25.562 --> 00:59:27.355
I could have been prejudiced.

988
00:59:27.939 --> 00:59:30.483
I could have been, man,
but I met nice white men.

989
00:59:30.567 --> 00:59:33.861
Come up, "Hello, little boy.
Is your mother home? I'd like a blowjob."

990
00:59:33.945 --> 00:59:36.656
My mother, I met my mother.
She's sitting out there.

991
00:59:36.739 --> 00:59:38.449
I love her. That's my mother.

992
00:59:38.533 --> 00:59:39.367
[applause]

993
00:59:39.450 --> 00:59:41.786
-[interviewer] Is she here?
-Come on, Ma! Don't hide your face!

994
00:59:42.537 --> 00:59:43.621
Get up there!

995
00:59:43.705 --> 00:59:44.998
[interviewer] I didn't know that.

996
00:59:45.081 --> 00:59:46.541
[Pryor] Don't cry, Ma.

997
00:59:47.625 --> 00:59:50.420
My grandmother's the lady
who used to discipline me, right?

998
00:59:50.503 --> 00:59:52.213
You know, beat my ass.

999
00:59:52.589 --> 00:59:55.258
Anyone here remember them switches?

1000
00:59:55.341 --> 00:59:58.845
You... right?
You used to have to go get off the tree

1001
00:59:58.928 --> 01:00:01.806
yourself, and take them leaves like that.

1002
01:00:02.390 --> 01:00:05.935
I see them trees today,
I will kill one of them motherfuckers.

1003
01:00:06.936 --> 01:00:09.647
And you get them switches,
and they start cutting wind

1004
01:00:09.731 --> 01:00:12.775
on the way home.
You hear, phew, phew.

1005
01:00:12.859 --> 01:00:15.403
Make you start crying
before you get in the house.

1006
01:00:15.486 --> 01:00:17.363
Phew, phew. Mama!

1007
01:00:18.906 --> 01:00:24.829
Phew, phew! I'm sorry, Mama.
I'll never play...

1008
01:00:24.912 --> 01:00:27.040
Mama, please! Mama, please!

1009
01:00:27.123 --> 01:00:29.042
Please, Mama! Please, Mama!

1010
01:00:30.335 --> 01:00:32.712
Ow, please, Mama! Ow, please, Ma!

1011
01:00:33.254 --> 01:00:34.589
Are you big in Europe?

1012
01:00:36.049 --> 01:00:37.258
What's the matter?

1013
01:00:38.509 --> 01:00:40.428
That's a legitimate question.

1014
01:00:41.846 --> 01:00:44.307
Gee, he really thinks I'm great.

1015
01:00:44.390 --> 01:00:46.017
-Just a moment.
-He thinks I'm funny.

1016
01:00:46.100 --> 01:00:47.977
-Just a moment.
-I got the laugh, not you.

1017
01:00:48.061 --> 01:00:50.688
-Just a moment.
-What do you mean, just a moment?

1018
01:00:50.772 --> 01:00:53.441
Sometimes, pain is funny later on.

1019
01:00:53.524 --> 01:00:55.943
You know what I mean?
Like when I was in jail.

1020
01:00:56.027 --> 01:00:58.529
I was in jail for income tax evasion.

1021
01:00:58.613 --> 01:01:00.907
-When?
-Last year.

1022
01:01:02.325 --> 01:01:04.911
-How much time did you get?
-I got enough.

1023
01:01:05.870 --> 01:01:08.498
I told the judge, I said,
"I forgot about my taxes."

1024
01:01:08.581 --> 01:01:10.750
He said,
"You'll remember next year, nigga."

1025
01:01:10.833 --> 01:01:14.337
And when you don't use sensitivity
when you're having sex, right?

1026
01:01:14.420 --> 01:01:16.964
Or share some of your soul,
nothing is going to happen.

1027
01:01:17.048 --> 01:01:21.135
Because men really get afraid.
Men are really scared in bed with a woman.

1028
01:01:21.219 --> 01:01:26.974
You got to have that macho shit working.
It's hard to say, "Did...

1029
01:01:28.393 --> 01:01:30.895
Did you, did you...

1030
01:01:32.188 --> 01:01:34.148
Did you uh...

1031
01:01:35.525 --> 01:01:37.026
Did you cum?

1032
01:01:39.195 --> 01:01:40.947
Did you?"

1033
01:01:42.740 --> 01:01:45.576
Because men get defensive if a woman says
she didn't cum.

1034
01:01:45.660 --> 01:01:47.328
Men get real defensive, right?

1035
01:01:47.412 --> 01:01:49.497
They won't take no fault for shit, right?

1036
01:01:49.580 --> 01:01:52.959
Men might say anything when they get
scared, right? Men go,

1037
01:01:53.042 --> 01:01:55.753
"Look, baby, maybe your pussy dead."

1038
01:02:02.385 --> 01:02:05.763
And women always have a great comeback,
right? Women say,

1039
01:02:05.847 --> 01:02:08.641
"Well, why don't you give it
mouth to mouth resuscitation?"

1040
01:02:09.183 --> 01:02:11.519
[cheers and applause]

1041
01:02:13.771 --> 01:02:15.189
-I have sinned.
-[Carson] Oh, no.

1042
01:02:15.273 --> 01:02:20.194
-In the past. And many, many--
-Heal!

1043
01:02:20.778 --> 01:02:23.948
You're the only white man alive
that's ever touched my head

1044
01:02:24.031 --> 01:02:25.533
without being killed.

1045
01:02:30.747 --> 01:02:34.000
[Pryor] Ali, man. I got in the ring
one time. Ali, man, is awesome.

1046
01:02:34.083 --> 01:02:36.878
The nigga, I was in a benefit with him
just for fun, boxing.

1047
01:02:36.961 --> 01:02:40.131
And just to get in the ring
with a nigga, your heart go... [shudders]

1048
01:02:41.174 --> 01:02:45.428
No, because something make you say,
I'm in this motherfucking ring and shit.

1049
01:02:45.511 --> 01:02:47.930
Does everybody know this is for fun?

1050
01:02:48.431 --> 01:02:51.225
The nigga be fucking with you, right?
As soon as you get in the ring,

1051
01:02:51.309 --> 01:02:53.728
Ali be talking about...
[mouthing words]

1052
01:02:55.772 --> 01:02:59.066
I said, "Wait a minute.
Does this nigga know it's a benefit?

1053
01:02:59.150 --> 01:03:02.195
He ain't supposed to hit my ass up
in this motherfucker."

1054
01:03:03.196 --> 01:03:04.781
And the nigga's so fast,

1055
01:03:04.864 --> 01:03:07.617
you don't see his punches
till they coming back.

1056
01:03:09.202 --> 01:03:11.662
That's all you see, right?
And your mind be saying,

1057
01:03:11.746 --> 01:03:12.872
"Wait a minute, now.

1058
01:03:12.955 --> 01:03:16.042
There was some shit in my face
a minute ago. I know that."

1059
01:03:17.585 --> 01:03:20.505
Then the coach say,
"Stick and move! Stick and move!"

1060
01:03:20.588 --> 01:03:23.925
And you be scared when you have
your first boxing-- Right? You be doing...

1061
01:03:31.724 --> 01:03:33.726
-Have you seen <i>The Exorcist?</i>
-Ah!

1062
01:03:38.898 --> 01:03:41.609
And women won't go to the bathroom
outside, right?

1063
01:03:41.692 --> 01:03:43.069
Ladies, you won't, will you?

1064
01:03:43.152 --> 01:03:44.946
"You want to go to the bathroom
out here, baby?"

1065
01:03:45.029 --> 01:03:46.072
"Uh-uh."

1066
01:03:46.697 --> 01:03:49.116
"Nope. Too much. Look, no. Uh-uh.

1067
01:03:49.200 --> 01:03:52.119
Too many things crawling around
could crawl up there. No.

1068
01:03:53.246 --> 01:03:55.414
I'll wait till we get back to the car."

1069
01:03:56.290 --> 01:03:58.709
I say, "Bitch, you ain't gonna piss
in the car!

1070
01:04:03.714 --> 01:04:06.217
You better drop your drawers
and piss here."

1071
01:04:07.969 --> 01:04:12.473
"I gotta go real bad, too.
Okay, I'm going to pull my panties down

1072
01:04:12.557 --> 01:04:13.933
a little bit.

1073
01:04:14.141 --> 01:04:17.812
Okay? Now, don't you do nothing.
Don't you be funny.

1074
01:04:18.688 --> 01:04:20.815
If you see something,
you let me know.

1075
01:04:22.358 --> 01:04:24.861
You're not going to do nothing funny,
are you?"

1076
01:04:24.944 --> 01:04:27.363
"No, baby. Go ahead.
I ain't gonna do nothing. Go ahead."

1077
01:04:27.446 --> 01:04:29.657
"Okay, I'll just pull it down
a little bit."

1078
01:04:39.834 --> 01:04:41.919
I like to wait till they get into it,
right?

1079
01:04:42.003 --> 01:04:43.796
You go, "Somebody's coming!"

1080
01:04:46.841 --> 01:04:49.135
I remember that's where I met
Louie Armstrong.

1081
01:04:49.218 --> 01:04:52.013
I walked in his dressing room.
I said, "How you doing, Louie?"

1082
01:04:52.096 --> 01:04:54.682
He said, "White folks still in the lead."

1083
01:04:57.268 --> 01:05:00.271
Don't go out with the Mafia.
You can't buy them dinner.

1084
01:05:00.354 --> 01:05:01.439
The motherfuckers like,

1085
01:05:01.522 --> 01:05:03.232
they always like to take entertainers
to dinner.

1086
01:05:03.316 --> 01:05:06.694
And they take you to dinner,
and they pick up the check all the time.

1087
01:05:06.777 --> 01:05:10.156
Right? And if you get mad,
you say, "Let me buy the check tonight.

1088
01:05:10.239 --> 01:05:12.325
Goddamn it, you guys buy me dinner
every night."

1089
01:05:12.408 --> 01:05:18.372
"Hey, kid. Let me tell you something.
We're crime.

1090
01:05:19.916 --> 01:05:21.417
And crime don't pay."

1091
01:05:25.129 --> 01:05:27.423
Anyone here ever had a heart attack?

1092
01:05:27.506 --> 01:05:28.883
Them motherfuckers hurt!

1093
01:05:29.884 --> 01:05:32.720
I'm not bullshitting, man.
I was walking in the front yard.

1094
01:05:32.803 --> 01:05:36.349
I was just walking along,
and something said, "Don't breathe!"

1095
01:05:38.434 --> 01:05:39.393
I'm saying, hmm?

1096
01:05:39.477 --> 01:05:41.938
"You heard me, motherfucker.
I said don't breathe!"

1097
01:05:42.063 --> 01:05:44.231
"Okay, I won't breathe. I won't breathe.
I won't."

1098
01:05:44.315 --> 01:05:48.986
"Then shut the fuck up then."
"Okay. I'm sorry. Don't kill me."

1099
01:05:49.070 --> 01:05:52.031
"Get on one knee and prove it."
"I won't get up."

1100
01:05:52.114 --> 01:05:54.617
"Don't kill me, don't..."
"You thinking about dying now, ain't you?"

1101
01:05:54.700 --> 01:05:56.327
"Yeah, I'm thinking about dying."

1102
01:05:56.410 --> 01:05:59.163
"You didn't think about it
when you was eating all that pork."

1103
01:05:59.246 --> 01:06:00.206
"I wasn't."

1104
01:06:06.295 --> 01:06:08.589
I woke up in an ambulance, right?

1105
01:06:08.673 --> 01:06:11.717
And it wasn't nothing
but white people staring at me.

1106
01:06:12.885 --> 01:06:15.054
I said, "Ain't this a bitch.

1107
01:06:16.430 --> 01:06:19.934
I've done died and wound up
in the wrong motherfucking heaven."

1108
01:06:22.770 --> 01:06:25.648
Now listen to me. All the people
you ever heard of freebasing,

1109
01:06:25.731 --> 01:06:28.150
have you ever heard
of anybody blowing up?

1110
01:06:29.902 --> 01:06:30.903
Why me?

1111
01:06:32.613 --> 01:06:35.825
Ten million motherfuckers freebase,
I got to blow up.

1112
01:06:38.995 --> 01:06:42.581
I want to say y'all gave me
a lot of love when I was...

1113
01:06:42.665 --> 01:06:45.668
not feeling well.
And y'all really, I appreciate it.

1114
01:06:45.751 --> 01:06:48.254
-Also, y'all did some... also...
-[applause]

1115
01:06:48.337 --> 01:06:49.422
Yeah, applaud yourself.

1116
01:06:49.505 --> 01:06:53.759
[applause]

1117
01:06:53.843 --> 01:06:57.388
Also, y'all did some nasty ass jokes
on my ass too.

1118
01:06:58.097 --> 01:07:01.475
Oh, yeah. Y'all didn't think
I saw some of these motherfuckers.

1119
01:07:01.559 --> 01:07:03.561
Since you love me so much.

1120
01:07:03.644 --> 01:07:06.063
I remember this one.
Strike the match like this.

1121
01:07:06.147 --> 01:07:08.858
What's that? Richard Pryor running
down the street.

1122
01:07:09.525 --> 01:07:12.903
I was watching TV one night,
and they said I had died.

1123
01:07:13.738 --> 01:07:15.781
I was bandaged up and shit.

1124
01:07:15.865 --> 01:07:18.242
They said, "Richard Pryor died
five minutes ago."

1125
01:07:18.325 --> 01:07:20.619
[muffled mumbling]

1126
01:07:22.872 --> 01:07:25.666
Now, what makes me angry
is the fact that

1127
01:07:25.750 --> 01:07:29.670
across the board, in my mind,
there's nobody I've ever met

1128
01:07:29.754 --> 01:07:34.175
in the business of comedy
who was any more brilliant than me.

1129
01:07:35.134 --> 01:07:38.054
And I will never get the recognition
for what I do.

1130
01:07:39.597 --> 01:07:41.432
[cheers and applause]

1131
01:07:46.020 --> 01:07:48.147
He called that one wrong, didn't he?

1132
01:07:49.732 --> 01:07:53.652
In 2016, I did my first Netflix special
in this very room.

1133
01:07:53.736 --> 01:07:54.570
It was March 12th,

1134
01:07:54.653 --> 01:07:57.740
the anniversary of when
<i>Richard Pryor: Live on Sunset Strip</i>

1135
01:07:58.616 --> 01:08:02.203
was released in theaters,
which he shot in this very room.

1136
01:08:02.286 --> 01:08:06.373
It was Easter weekend, when people
celebrate Jesus rising from the dead.

1137
01:08:06.457 --> 01:08:09.627
And when he shot that special,
he had burnt himself on fire.

1138
01:08:09.710 --> 01:08:12.004
It was his first time back
in front of the public

1139
01:08:12.088 --> 01:08:13.547
after that terrible incident.

1140
01:08:13.631 --> 01:08:16.050
And it was my first time back
in the public

1141
01:08:16.133 --> 01:08:19.136
after that nasty spill
I took on television.

1142
01:08:21.013 --> 01:08:23.015
It's an honor to be here tonight.

1143
01:08:23.974 --> 01:08:25.267
We love you, Richard.

1144
01:08:26.102 --> 01:08:27.478
We love you, Richard.

1145
01:08:27.561 --> 01:08:29.063
[cheers and applause]

1146
01:08:32.233 --> 01:08:34.985
It's my pleasure to induct Richard Pryor
into The Hall.

1147
01:08:35.069 --> 01:08:36.112
[applause]

1148
01:08:36.195 --> 01:08:40.032
♪♪

1149
01:08:46.831 --> 01:08:48.666
Thank you guys very much
for being here.

1150
01:08:48.749 --> 01:08:50.376
God bless you and good night.

1151
01:08:51.085 --> 01:08:52.628
[cheers and applause]

1152
01:08:54.088 --> 01:08:56.006
♪♪

1153
01:08:57.800 --> 01:08:59.051
<i>♪ The Hall ♪</i>

1154
01:08:59.135 --> 01:09:00.928
<i>♪ The the the the Hall ♪</i>

1155
01:09:02.179 --> 01:09:04.807
<i>♪ The Hall</i>
<i>Year year year year year ♪</i>

1156
01:09:06.350 --> 01:09:08.227
<i>♪ Year One ♪</i>

1157
01:09:12.106 --> 01:09:15.526
<i>♪ Mix Master Mike</i>
<i>Mix mix mix ♪</i>

1158
01:09:15.609 --> 01:09:17.570
<i>♪Mix master</i>
<i>Mix Master Mike ♪</i>

1159
01:09:17.653 --> 01:09:19.196
<i>♪ Mike Mike Mike ♪</i>

1160
01:09:19.280 --> 01:09:21.157
<i>♪ The Hall Year One ♪</i>

1161
01:09:24.243 --> 01:09:30.124
<i>♪♪</i>