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- Girls, don't forget to unload the van.
- Okay, mom.
- Cheer up girls.
It's not like it's the first time we've moved.
- Probably not the last time either.
- It's okay with me.
I make friends wherever I go.
- Hey Ralph, you wanted to see me?
- Yes, yes, come on in Darla.
Just make yourself at home.
- How are you doing?
- It's been pretty rough.
It's not easy going through a divorce.
- Can you tell us about the divorce?
- Ralph? - Well?
- If you feel comfortable telling us what's been going on,
maybe we can help.
- It's a very long story,
but the short version of it
is that my husband decided after 19 years of marriage,
that he didn't wanna be married anymore.
And he's also told me that he wants to explore other options
and other life possibilities.
- Well, was there any infidelity during your marriage?
- Not that I know of, no.
- Oh, sorry to hear that.
So how are you responding?
How are you taking it?
- I'm trying to let go somehow.
- You're not fighting for it?
You're not fighting for your marriage?
- I'm not going to force myself on him,
and I'm not gonna stay in a loveless marriage,
and I'm not gonna make my young vulnerable daughters
be around someone who clearly does not love them
or their mother.
- No, we understand that.
It's just that- - What?
- Well, here at our church,
we believe that the only biblical reason for a divorce is,
well it's marital unfaithfulness.
Well, since there was no infidelity.
Yeah, I know you mentioned that he said he wanted
to pursue other avenues,
but since there wasn't any actual cheating
and you're just willing to go with it and not fight
for your marriage...
- What are you saying?
Are you trying to say that it's my fault even partially?
My young girls need to know that they are valued and loved.
And if he's not willing to do it,
then he can be on his way.
The Bible also says that,
"If the wicked choose to depart, let them depart."
- It just looks bad.
You know very well the blow
that the leadership team here has had this past year
with the youth pastor scandal, he deceived us all,
and now a young girl's life will never be the same.
We just have to make sure that the congregation
and the membership know
that we're not willing to just throw anyone into leadership,
that we're not going to hire child predators,
or bums, or divorcing couples.
- What is this about, your image?
Come on, Ralph.
You knew about my husband.
You knew how hard I tried for years
to get him to come to church.
- That's not the point.
- What is the point?
The Bible says to avoid all appearances of evil.
And quite frankly, we're just not doing a good job of that.
It's like evil is just prancing around,
dancing all over our living rooms for all to see.
- So you're releasing me from the leadership team?
- We have to.
We can't afford to have any more rumors going around.
- What am I going to tell my girls
who now do not have a father?
And now, they don't even have a leadership role
in their own church.
- Oh, this does not affect your girls in any way.
They are completely fine to stay where they are.
- Our family is broken up enough
and I will allow no more of it, goodbye.
- Was that completely necessary?
- So I was thinking about in my new room,
adding my bed on that one wall-
- Is that the room I want?
- What room are you talking about?
- The room at the end of the hall.
- The one with the big window?
- I told you that's the one I wanted.
- No, that's the one I get.
- Actually guys, I wanted that one.
- No, that's the one I get.
- Do you guys actually think you're the one
that's getting the room?
- Yes, I do.
I do think that.
- And why do you think that?
- Because I should get it.
- I'm the oldest.
You shouldn't be the one who gets it.
- So, I don't care if you're the oldest.
- I would just really appreciate it
if I was the one that got the room.
- I'm sorry, but you're the oldest
and you always think you get everything you want.
I'm getting the room. - Grow up.
- Girls, I've had enough.
Megan, go clean up.
Kayla, go to your room.
- What room? - What room?
- Dear heavenly Father, in the name of Jesus.
I just ask you to help me.
I have felt so rejected.
You Lord, You are so good
and You are so faithful Lord.
Forgive me Lord for letting this bitterness
and pain seep in me.
Just change this heart of stone into a heart of flesh.
And Lord, help me to forgive Bill.
In fact, right now Lord, I choose to forgive him.
I forgive him for leaving us.
And Lord, I just ask that wherever he is right now Lord,
that You would bless him.
And that You would bring people into his life Lord,
that point to You.
And Lord, that he would see his deep need for You.
And Lord, I just ask that You would be with my daughters,
that You would be with our daughters.
I know Lord that You are love.
I just ask that You help them to see their worth in You.
Lord, I believe that they are gonna be okay
because they're going to turn to You,
that they're turning to You, Lord.
I know Lord God that they are turning to You right now
in this time of hardship.
And they are seeking You and they are finding their worth
in You Lord.
I believe that Lord.
You're saying in Your word, that all things work for good
for those who love You, and we love You Lord.
Thank You so much for all that You do for us.
And thank You for Your love Lord.
We grasp that love Lord.
You are the Lord of Lords and the King of kings,
and You are the way the truth and the life.
Thank You Lord for being there.
I commit myself to You Lord.
Please mold me and heal me and transform me
to be more like Jesus.
In Jesus' precious name, amen.
Let's just talk about this.
- Look, I've had enough.
I cannot do this anymore.
No, there's no anything!
- We gotta keep trying.
Let's go to church together.
Let's get some counseling.
- Listen, what'll God for this relationship?
He hasn't been here for 19 years!
- Please Bill, don't give up on us!
- There is no way.
I can't do this anymore.
I just don't love you anymore.
- What about the girls?
- Don't you care about them?
- Are you kidding?
Of course I care about them!
Do not turn this on me.
You'll pray for me God.
Pray for this marriage that's been doomed for 19 years.
- Don't give up on us.
- Give up on what?
I don't love you anymore.
Give up on what?
- But what about the girls?
- What about the girls?
What about 'em?
- Don't you care about 'em?
- Do not do this to me, of course I care about them!
- Oh God!
So I think I'm enjoying your cat decorations
more than ever before this year.
- Oh wow, so how are you doing?
- So you've heard about what happened at church?
- Yeah.
- So I'm sitting here coming to the realization
that everything that I thought was important in 19 years
is basically just kind of fallen apart overnight.
And I have to come to the realization that I have to do it
on my own and start over again.
- You know it doesn't have to be like that?
- You know what,
something about you ever since we were kids
is that you just can't seem or are willing to see things
as they really are.
- Has anyone from church reached out to you?
- No.
- There are still some of us who are praying for you.
- Don't say that.
You don't know that.
And don't believe everything everybody says.
Also just because someone says they're praying for you,
doesn't mean that they are.
Love is action.
- That's true.
- And we can't just sweep everything under the rug
and act like it's not happening.
For the first time in my life,
I'm all on my own and I'm doing it all by myself.
- Listen, you're gonna find another church
and you're gonna make new friends.
- I don't think so.
- What do you want then?
Do you wanna be alone?
- I want to be more selective on who I allow to be close
to me and my children.
And I'm not looking for church leadership for starters.
- So guys, our first day of school is tomorrow.
- I know, do you guys think we're gonna be popular?
- I highly doubt it Caitlyn.
We're not jocks, movie people, musicians, we're nobodys.
- I'm a jock.
- And I sing and play ukulele.
You've never been on a real cross country team
and you are just a beginner, we're nobodys.
- Maybe so, but I'm no quitter.
- You're just a jock and you're just a musician.
- Okay. - I'm a foodie too.
- Oh, my. - I'm also really good
at sewing and my kind of music never goes out of style.
- What kind of style is that?
- Cute teen rock music.
- If you see me at school, don't look at me, don't touch me,
don't talk to me and especially don't sit with me at lunch.
- So, are you new here?
- That obvious, huh?
- No, it's just
that there aren't many attractive girls around here
so when one does come around, it's pretty noticeable.
- Oh really?
I'd say these halls are full of attractive girls.
So yeah, you're gonna have to do better than that.
- Hello handsome, who's this?
- It's no one.
I mean, she's new here.
- I'd say so.
- I didn't catch her name though.
- Kayla.
- Braiden, and this is my girlfriend, Cami.
- So where'd you move from?
- Bakersville, it's about an hour and a half away from here.
- I see.
- I saw you at our football game.
Yeah, I just forgot to mention.
- Oh right, yeah, that's much more believable
than the first reason you gave me.
- We should probably get going to class.
It was really nice to see you.
I'll see you around.
- Nice to meet you Carla.
- Kayla, and right back at ya.
This is gonna be an interesting first week
and I never went to a football game.
This is my first day.
- So why am I here again?
- It's just school policy
that when a student goes through a traumatic event
such as a death or separation of parents in the household,
or really any other life-changing event
that we allow students to miss three hours of class per week
to give them counseling.
- Oh, sweet, well, it's well worth it for the free coffee.
- So how are things at home?
- I mean, fine I guess.
Making some new friends here and getting involved in band
so yeah, that's really cool.
- You're not having any problems at home?
- Oh, no, not at all.
I just got a new ukulele for my birthday
and me and my sisters all got their own rooms
for the first time.
So I can't really complain.
- What about your dad?
- Well, I don't really see my dad much,
but I'm sure he's just busy.
This is so good.
Do you think I could have another cup?
I promise I'll tell you about all my problems.
- She's in denial.
- What do you mean?
- She's suppressing all this pain and anguish
and not addressing the issues at home.
- That's Caitlyn, that's how she copes with things.
She's in her own little world.
- Yes well, I think I need to work
with her a little bit more
because if she doesn't address these issues,
they're gonna manifest themselves
in other ways one day when you least expect it.
- Okay, do whatever you feel you need to do.
- Okay well, if you have any questions or concerns,
give me a call. - Thank you.
- Hey, are you new here?
- You're like the fifth person today who's asked me that.
- Oh, sorry.
- It's all good.
At least you came up and said something.
Most, everyone just gives me looks.
- Oh well, most of us still welcome newcomers.
I'm just terrible with faces.
- Well, I'm the same way with names so I get ya.
I'm Megan. - Ashley.
- Tell me that three more times before we leave tonight.
- Okay, deal.
Well, why don't you just come over here?
I'll introduce you to the rest of the group.
- Yeah, I just got wait on the other extensions
of me basically.
- Oh, you're waiting for someone?
- Yeah, my two sisters.
I don't know what's keeping them.
Oh, there they are.
- Sorry, we're late.
Kayla got lost in the five meter building
and my therapy session went over
because I was on the verge of suicide.
- Yeah, I gotta meet with that counselor tomorrow.
- Me too.
- Well, if it wasn't for the free coffee,
I wouldn't be there.
- Yeah well guys, this is Anna.
- Ashley. - Ashley, of course, sorry.
- It's okay, y'all can just join us up here.
- Okay.
- Hey, are you busy?
- Nope, come on in.
- I just wanted to let you know
that I ran some more numbers
from the real estate account like you wanted me to
and it just so happens that
that piece of property right at the county line,
all the way up to as far as the 85 mile marker
is up for sale.
- Okay, and I suppose you want me to strike a deal
with the owners?
- Absolutely, that's you and Barbara.
That's y'all's forte.
Y'all can handle that.
I've nothing to do with that.
But the reason I wanted to tell you about it specifically
is ironically enough,
this piece of land is where your old church is on.
- Okay I mean, and why would I care about that?
- Well, I don't know.
I just thought you might be interested.
- Ben, what is going on
in that schemish little mind of yours?
- All right, I admit it.
So I was just thinking
that maybe since that particular plot of land
is say no longer under government ownership.
- It isn't?
- No, it's actually been under private ownership
for about the last two and a half years or so.
The old owners basically just cashed out
and went and got some land further West
or whatever or whatnot.
But anyway, the point is if in fact,
you wanna show your old little church people whatnot,
once our company acquires the ownership for that land,
you can do whatever you wanna do with it.
- Like what?
- I don't know, sell it, burn it to the ground .
Catch you later.
- So girls, how was your first day?
- Good. - Good.
- Everyone kept staring at us
and commenting about the way we dress.
They kept using this one word, like consi, consi-something.
- Conservative?
- Right, that's it, conservative.
- Caitlyn, your counselor called today.
She said you're suppressing a lot of pain.
- I am, that coffee causes heartburn
for me after five cups.
- No wonder you can't sleep.
You're doped out on caffeine.
Anybody else?
- I met a cute guy today.
Relax, he's got a girlfriend much hotter than me.
- I doubt that.
- That's not saying much.
- Girls?
- I bet you didn't meet a cute guy today.
- Well, I will admit you got me there,
but I did make a new friend.
- Oh yeah. - Who?
- Her name's Ashley.
She is one of the leaders of the on-campus crusade.
And she wants us to go to church with her on Sunday.
- No. - No?
I already told her we would.
I thought that would be a no brainer.
- Mom, I know how you feel about what happened,
but you don't want us to go to church anymore?
- Maybe you can have her over for dinner.
- I'm sure that would be fine.
- No, you just said that, right?
You know, wait, you know when you're leaving?
- Oh, did you do that all by yourself?
- Oh, it's only 2000 pieces.
You start from the corners and work your way in.
It's no big deal.
- I see, and how are things at home?
- We're getting along despite everything that's happened.
- Are you adjusting well to school?
- Well, it's school.
I have to make the most of everything.
I'm the oldest
so my little sisters look to me for leadership.
If I'm okay, they can find it in themselves to be okay.
- Are you finding school challenging?
- My life sucks, okay?
I'm the poster child for the doped up,
can't function, problem teen of the new generation.
Now, can you just pack me full of Prozac,
or lithium, or tranquilizers,
or canned arsenic for that matter,
or whatever it is you guys prescribe
and send me on my merry way.
I'm missing gym class.
- She said what?
- Hey, you're crazy.
- I'd rather be crazy than be with you.
- Okay last night, your dogs kept me up
for half an hour because he was scratching in the inside
of the gate. - Oh my God, what?
- And so, I was a little upset
so I yelled, "Stop!"
- Oh my God.
- He listened to me and I was like, "Fabulous."
- Hey. - Hey.
- So about church this Sunday.
- You can't come?
- Well, let's just say my mom wants
to get to know you first,
kind of know what she's getting herself into.
- Oh yeah, of course, that's fine.
- Awesome, could you come to dinner tonight
or maybe tomorrow night?
- Yeah, tonight can be fine.
- Great, I'm hungry.
My mom makes a lot. - Okay.
This is really good, thank you.
- Oh yeah, it is isn't it?
- So Ashley, do you go
to church around here somewhere close do you?
- Yeah, my dad is actually the Senior Pastor.
- And your parents aren't divorced I suppose?
- Mom?
- Oh no, they're very much together
and very much in love.
In fact, I think just last week,
my dad got my mom this really nice gift
and we were so excited.
My dad, oh.
- That's very nice.
Well Ashley, we want our daughters
to be in an environment that's safe, very safe.
- Well yeah, our church is definitely in a safe section
of town for sure.
- She means friendly environment and non-judgemental.
- Oh, oh yeah, our church is definitely all about that.
The culture of our church is definitely one of grace.
- Because that's what our last church said.
- It's okay.
- Mom wouldn't keep us from going to church would she?
- Where are you going?
- To get a second helping.
- Grab me one more too while you're out there please.
- You're gonna get fat.
- Nope, I have another 10 years to eat like a pig
before my metabolism catches up with me,
according to my science teacher.
- Oh, here comes Bradley!
- Hey there!
- What's up?
- Hey guys.
- Dude, that girl is staring you down.
- Yeah man.
- Sidney?
- Yeah, that's him, that's Sidney.
- I was almost in the cold.
- My name was almost .
- This is Chadwin's plant, Edward
He's very handsome.
- I used to water him so much.
I don't know why.
- All right, all right everybody.
Thank you guys all for coming.
For those of you who don't know me,
I am Terrence.
I see some new faces.
It's very nice to have you guys.
And this is my lovely fiance, Andrea.
Together, we run the Young Life Program
on Thursday evenings,
or lead or figurehead this little assembly,
if you will.
So we would like to go around and introduce each other.
And I know that you guys that have been here
for a while have done this a million times,
but we'd like to make a level playing field
for all of our newcomers.
So if you want, state your name,
your year in school and how many years you've been coming
to Living Waters.
And of course a fun fact,
something interesting that you would like other people
in the group to know about you.
So I'll start as always.
And then Andrea will go and we'll go around this way.
So again, my name is Terrence.
I am a fourth year at NHU.
I've been coming to Living Waters for 12 years,
leading for three.
And a fun fact about myself is that my dad is that Pastor
that you guys all see on TV.
- Hi, I'm Andrea like Terrence said.
I am a junior at NHU.
I've been coming here for five years now.
And my interesting thing is that I've been in every country
in Europe following the Newsboys.
- Must be nice.
- Kayla!
- Yeah, it was really an experience.
- I'm Braiden, I'm a senior
and this is me and my girlfriend's first time too.
Interesting fact about me
is that I actually won the MVP
of our high school's football team two years in a row.
And here's to three.
- Oh, that's where I know you from,
you scored that winning touchdown
against was it Willow Creek last year?
- Yeah, I did it again against Mountain View.
- Oh yeah, I saw that too.
Heck yeah man, welcome. - Yeah.
- So I'm Cami, it's my first night here.
I'm a senior at school.
Interesting thing about me
is that I got to interview Reese Witherspoon
for an article in our magazine.
She was so awesome.
- Wow.
- Hi, I'm Ashley.
I am a senior here at Heath High and I've been going here
for about four years now.
I'd say the most interesting thing about me
is that I've read the Bible four times all the way through.
- Wow, that's interesting.
- Well then, what's your favorite book then?
- Oh golly, I don't really have a favorite book.
It's more like I like the New Testament better
than the Old Testament.
- The New Testament, what about the Old Testament?
The battles like the Israelites led by,
let's see Moses and Joshua and King David?
- I'm sure your favorite
is the Israelites getting exiled to Babylon
and that evil King Zedekiah getting his eyes gouged out
and his sons killed right in front of him.
- Yeah, no.
- Okay, hi, I'm Megan.
I'm here tonight with my two sisters
and I'll let them introduce themselves.
I am new to Heath High going into my senior year
and this is our first night here.
I guess my interesting thing about me/accomplishment
is I won state title for individual track last year.
- Wow. - Wow.
- Hi, I'm Caitlyn, and like she said,
first time here and interesting thing about me
is I'm awesome at everything I do.
No, I'm just kidding.
I'm a singer/songwriter.
- Oh, that's cool. - Wow.
- I'm Kayla, first time and nothing interesting about me.
- Oh come on, I'm sure there's something.
- No, no famous dad or any dad really for that matter.
No track star crap, no music,
no trophies, no state title, no football
no "Legally blonde" actresses, no Europe.
- Well, I'm sure you've accomplished more
than you think you have.
- She just hasn't found her niche yet.
- Well, just remember
that you're a child of God first and foremost.
Hold fast to that and build from there.
- Now you sound like my mom.
- Okay, so before we turn this into a pity party
for whining losers, let's move on.
- Well, thanks for coming tonight guys.
And thanks for sharing.
Kayla is not alone.
We understand many of you guys are going through hard times
that you don't wanna talk about tonight.
And we completely understand.
We just hope the message tonight blesses you.
By the way Ashley,
I think we can all agree that the Old Testament
is not as good as the New Testament.
Speaking of which, that brings us to the topic of the night.
So this semester, we will be focusing on, drum roll please.
Now, I'm going to use an old term here
and it's something that's very important to us.
And it's something that we're all called to be
as individuals and as a church.
And this is a little cliche,
a little misplaced, overused ministers.
We're called to minister or to effect,
but a word I think better describes it
is to impact.
We're all called to impact those around us.
And it's not just our friends and the ones
that are closest to us.
We're called to impact even those
that are farthest from God.
So the question that we wanna ask tonight
is how often have we been doing that?
I know I'm not perfect.
There's plenty of people that I run into in my everyday life
that I am frankly too busy for.
And other times I say that I'm too busy
even though there's a million other things I could be doing
at the moment.
So with that, let's open Ephesians 4,
and there's a verse that I want you to go over.
I think it speak a little bit of truth into this.
Start with verse 29 alrighty.
"No foul language should come out of your mouths,
"but only such as is good for needed edification
"that it may impart grace to those who hear.
"And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God
"with which you were sealed for the day of redemption.
"All bitterness, fury, anger, shouting,
"inner viling must be removed from you along with all
"of their malice.
"And be kind to one another, compassionate,
"forgiving one another as God has forgiven you in Christ."
- I think these are all verses that we kind of know
in our heads, but it's not really something
that we practice on a day-to-day basis,
hasn't really penetrated our hearts.
In our modern Western Christian culture,
we're so focused on the importance of our lives
and our schedules that we're not focusing
on what's really important,
even if we ourselves don't think we're important or matter.
- Hey, I just wanted to give some words of encouragement.
Megan told me you guys
were kind of going through a hard time right now.
- Yeah, she talks too much.
- Yeah, some of us do.
I just wanted to know if you wanted
to maybe get some coffee sometime?
I'd love to hear your story and see what we can do to help.
- I appreciate the gesture Miss, Europe,
but I really don't think that's the best idea.
How's Saturday morning sound?
- Sounds good, I'll write down my number.
- Hey, thank you so much for inviting me over
to dinner the other night.
It was so fun.
- Yeah, thanks for inviting me to this.
- I'm so glad you all came.
- Yeah, thanks for inviting us.
Also, would you keep Kayla in your prayers?
Our family's been going through divorce
and she hasn't been taking it very well.
- Oh no, yeah, absolutely.
And about the other night, I'm so sorry.
I did not know you guys were going through that.
- No, it's okay.
I'm the one that should have said something.
- We should get together sometime.
- Yeah, we should.
We should go to a coffee shop.
- I love coffee.
- Hey! - Oh, hey.
- I'm old enough to know when it's time to skedaddle.
- Where do you think you're going?
- You two have to talk.
- You're not escaping that easily.
- Come on, you know it's new guy, new girl, they meet.
- Quit your babbling and get over here.
- Oh, okay.
- So cool message tonight, huh?
- Yeah, for sure.
You can never hear too much
about loving others, huh Caitlyn?
- Yeah, love is dope.
- Well, I just wanted to let you know
that some of us are going to see that new movie
at the theater downtown on Saturday
and you're welcome to join us if you want.
- Yeah, that's so nice of you.
I'll check my schedule and let you know tomorrow.
- Hi, you social butterfly.
- She knows what I do.
- Yeah, you again.
- Yes. - I invited her
to come to the movies with our group on Saturday.
- Our group, what group?
It was just supposed to be the two of us.
- Well, plans change.
- Oh, I mean, she's a very busy girl.
She probably doesn't have time for us on Saturday.
- You know what, that reminds me,
I actually have a birthday gig to go to
with my sister Saturday.
- We do?
Oh right, Owen Sue, of course, my bad.
- So maybe next time.
- Next time.
- Great, see y'all round.
- See you next week.
- What, you'll see are next week?
- Heartbreaker, you're gonna be a heartbreaker.
- Shut up, you're not big enough
to where I still can't kick your butt.
- Good morning, everyone.
It's another beautiful Sunday morning.
With heavy hearts,
we have an announcement that we need to make.
It's gonna be hard for some of you congregation to swallow.
It's certainly very difficult for us,
but our church has reached a decision
and we regret to inform everyone.
- Babe, did you see Stacy?
I mean, she was judging me
especially when the offering was going around.
She was watching how much we were putting in there.
Babe, I'm just feeling a lot of judgment right now.
Did you see the way that Stacy looked at you?
- Yeah, I did, but I don't think it was because of him.
- We need to talk to them about it.
- Seriously? - Yeah.
- Why do you have to make everything a joke?
It's not a joke.
It's not funny, I'm serious.
- It's very healing to people.
- Babe, I just feel like everyone's judging us.
I mean, did you see Connie? - Yeah.
- The way that she looked at us.
- She smells funny today, it's weird.
- I think it's her grandmother's perfume.
So we need to not say anything about that.
- Hey. - Hi!
It's just so hard what's going in.
I'm so sorry about all that.
- It is, yeah.
Pastor Smith and his wife have been here for 20 years.
- I know, it's heartbreaking.
- And we're here to support him
and his family any way we can.
- Paul, you're on the board.
I mean, I hate to keep airing dirty laundry,
but did you have anything to do with this?
- It was a business decision that we needed to make
and it's been staring us in the face for a while now.
We tried to come up with alternate solutions,
but let's face it, our membership is dwindling
and we're just not getting the offerings that we used to.
People wanna keep blowing this out of proportion
like it's a direct stab to Pastor Smith and his family.
It's not, it's not personal at all.
- No. - We don't wanna see him go,
but it was a business decision.
And you would have done the same thing at your company.
When the numbers are down as tough as it is,
you do layoffs.
It's how every business in the world works
and we gotta do what's best for the church.
- I understand.
- Well, if you'll excuse me, I'll go pick up the kids.
- Get up.
- So hey Ralph, we got any of that tripping budget left
by any chance?
- No, we're fresh out.
- Well, come on baby,
we're probably the next ones to get kicked out.
- Are you going to group lunch?
- Yeah, yeah.
- Okay, I'll save you a seat.
- This place has become a laughing stock.
- Hey, can I talk to you for a second?
- Why do you always have to be a joker?
- Because it's funny.
- It's not, seriously stop it, shut up.
- I just wanted to ask you about what's going on.
I mean, I talked to you about what happened with my sister,
but now Pastor Smith?
What is happening with our church?
- I know, honestly, I've been really praying
about what's been going on lately.
And especially with your sister,
I don't even fully agree
with the decisions being made about that.
And I just feel like our church panics at the first sign
of a problem,
and I'm just really feeling convicted about it.
- I can't believe they did this to us.
They can't do this to us.
The church wouldn't even exist without you Harold.
- Honey, technically they can, but you have to remember,
they're responsible for the church's financial future.
I mean, if tithes and offerings aren't up to par,
and you have to admit they haven't been for quite a while,
then sacrifices have to be made.
- But why us?
We are the church.
They wouldn't be anywhere near
where they are today without us.
- You have to understand that we get paid generously
for what we do.
Look, you have to stop looking at it
as what they've done to us,
rather more what God is doing through us
in this unfortunate situation.
- Are you gonna fight it Harold?
Don't you feel it's unjust?
- I could Amanda, but what would I really be fighting for?
And what kind of example would we be leading
especially to those who know us at church and beyond?
Look honey, we have to pray over this
and see what God does in the meantime in providing for us,
in meeting our needs and then what the next step is.
- You can't fool me Harold.
You're just as worried as I am.
- We'll get through it.
- Look, I need to get something straight with you.
- Okay. - Braiden's mine, okay?
I've seen the way you've been flirting with him.
- Flirting?
- Last week at Bible study,
he couldn't keep his eyes off of you all night.
- And that's my fault?
- You and your sisters parade yourself around
like you're something special.
You show up at a new school with your perfect clothes
and your crazy hair.
You don't keep quiet like the others.
You just show up, guns blazing.
- Look girl, Braiden, you can have him, okay.
Let's just say he's not my type.
- Oh, he's not good enough for you?
- You're jealous, it's obvious.
- Oh honey, don't play with the big girls.
You don't wanna play in the big leagues I promise.
You we're in way, way over your head.
- I got to go to class, but yeah,
try to have more confidence in yourself.
I mean, Braiden's not stalking me yet.
He's still talking to you, right?
- Okay, you want war,
I'll give you war.
Two can play that game.
- So you and your family are new to the area?
- What's left of us, yeah.
- Yeah, Ashley told me you guys
were going through a divorce.
- Oh she did huh?
- I'm sorry, I was just trying to help.
- Not only did I go through a divorce
when I was eight years old,
but the man my mom was married to wasn't even my real dad.
I was what the church would call an illegitimate child.
- I'm what you would call not the brightest crown
in the box.
I'm sorry, what's that mean?
- Oh, I was born out of wedlock and for the longest time,
I really, really struggled with my identity
as a person and my certainty as a child of God.
I mean, I wasn't even supposed to exist.
I was a result of my parents' sin
and being in the middle of a divorce,
it's like, how can God honestly love me
and have a plan for me?
I believed it for everyone else,
but I couldn't accept it for myself.
And I was just so afraid that one day it would be revealed
to me that I wouldn't inherit the great things from God
that my pastors and my religious people
that I knew growing up would.
It took me a long time to realize that we're all here
for a reason.
And God loves to take people from broken circumstances
and make them into something wonderful,
that's what He does.
- When I first came here, no one ever talked to me.
People would pass right by me and not even say a word.
Guys that I would talk to,
They would just say they were too busy.
Then the next week, they'd be with another girl.
It upset me to the point
that I felt like I wasn't good enough
to be in a relationship with a good Christian man.
I felt like I didn't fit in with the Christian circle.
If God loved me so much,
then why did I mean so little to His other children.
- I appreciate you all sharing your stories with me.
- You feel similar because your dad left?
- Honestly, I'm not really sure how I'm feeling about it.
- Were you close with your dad?
- Still am, he says him leaving mom had nothing
to do with us.
- You believe him, right?
- I guess.
- I guess what we're trying to say
is that you shouldn't let this experience
define your relationship with God and how you view God.
God wants us to fight for our relationship with Him
and our relationship with our spouses and others.
- Thanks.
- Do you mind if we pray for you?
- Sure.
- Heavenly Father, I pray for Kayla right now.
Please give her a peace and a comfort
that only You can give.
I pray that we would be good friends to her
and that we would understand and help her
and that she would understand
that we're glorifying You.
I pray God that You'd please give her family comfort
and that she'd be able to fit in well with school,
that You'd help her with school and all her friends.
I pray that she'd start making more friends
and that she would grow in You and a relationship with You
and her family.
Please give her and her family a peace and a comfort
that only You can give.
I pray that we give blessing to her
and that we'd encourage her
and that she would be blessed by us
and want to turn to You Lord for everything.
I pray that we all would be more dependent on You
and rely on who Christ is and what He has done for us
on the cross.
- And Lord, I just pray that you please just protect
and guard Kayla's heart
as she goes through these uncertain times.
And I pray for Your hand to just be
on her whole family right now during these times Lord.
And I pray that You just help her to keep in mind
that she's a child of God first and foremost Lord.
And I just pray for Your love to just show in her life Lord.
And thank You for these amazing times
that we've got together.
And all the things I ask in Your holy name, amen.
- Amen. - Amen, thank you.
- Good morning.
- Hey, how are you doing?
- Moving right along, I suppose.
And you?
- Great, I have the afternoon off work
so I'm gonna go do a little early Christmas shopping.
You and the girls still coming over on Friday?
- Of course, the girls are excited to see you.
- Hey, I heard you found a new church.
- They're exploring other options
with their friends at school.
They haven't really convinced me to come along yet.
- Well, why not?
I figured you'd be excited to start somewhere new?
- You know that I'm not going to keep my daughters
from going back to church.
I just would never do that.
It's just my job to protect them.
And naturally, I'm afraid
that they're going to be greatly disappointed again.
I just don't want them to turn their backs on God
because of the wrongs that the church has done toward them.
I just wish they would have waited.
- It is all part of the plan Darla.
I want you to believe that.
Anyway, I was calling because I wanted to let you know
about something that happened at church.
It might make you feel better.
- I'm all ears.
I need some good news about right now.
- Well, I wouldn't say that it's good news.
Pastor Smith got let go.
They say due to financial reasons.
- Really?
- Yeah, it's made a lot of people upset,
but we took up a collection for him and his wife
before a lot of people took off.
- Took off?
- Yeah, but no,
a bunch of people thought this was a huge injustice
and they left the church.
Anyway, I just wanted to let you know
that what happened to you was not right
and it wasn't your fault.
It's just, these guys have their ideas
about how things should be done
and they don't stray from them.
- Well, - I appreciate you letting me know.
- Well, to be honest,
we're trying to get better as a church, but to be honest,
I feel like the congregation is in its Twilight stage.
- You may be more right than you think.
- Well, don't wish bad things on anyone.
You're better than that.
Listen, I got to go.
It's time for me to start my shopping.
I'll see you girls on Friday.
- You bet.
- All right, love you. - Love you.
- All right, bye.
- I miss you guys too.
- Can you please be quiet?
- She's just telling me to stop.
Watch this, I just learned it yesterday.
Pretty cool huh?
It's so hard.
- Hey, I'm hanging out with some friends for a little bit.
- On a school night?
- I won't be out late.
- So where do you wanna go?
- I don't know, wherever you wanna go.
- I know this cool place.
- Okay, what kind of place?
- Just somewhere where we can talk.
- Do you know him?
- Yeah, it's a smelly old hobo begging again.
I'll take care of him.
Hey buddy, you hungry?
- God bless you.
- Bon apetit buddy.
- God bless you.
- Bradley!
- Hey guys, what's up?
- This is my girl Kayla.
- Oh, yes I see you. - Okay.
- You feeling okay?
- What's wrong baby?
What the?
- Hey, we were in the neighborhood
and thought we would give you a lift.
- Seriously?
- We're gonna get some ice cream on the way home.
We only have one seat left for one passenger.
- We could probably squeeze.
Oh yep, only one seat left, sorry.
- I'll get you for this later.
- You'll thank me for this later.
- I'll text you.
- You forgot this.
- One thing that God really put
on our hearts to talk about tonight
is division among believers, division in the church.
And one thing that Paul talks about in the New Testament
is that we'll be recognized
or identified might be a more accurate word for our fruit,
our love for one another.
- Yeah, even amongst the strongest of Christians,
sin can creep in and drive a wedge in your relationships.
Now, one thing God has shown me
is that our minds are so finite,
that God is so much bigger,
so much bigger than the limited circumstances
that our minds can create on the path in front of us.
- Hey Andrea, can I ask you something?
- Yeah, what's up?
- I have something I need your advice on.
- Okay.
- Are you done?
- Are you?
- You are the one that doesn't know what they want.
- Are you kidding me?
- If I was kidding, we wouldn't be having this conversation.
- Oh my God.
- Of me being not participating
when I'm the one who called you over here
to actually have this conversation.
I honestly care about this.
And you're the one that kind of like,
you're the one that's always doing this,
always bringing stuff up.
You aren't bringing anything up.
- Bummer.
- Hey you, just wanted to let you know
that me and Cami are no more.
- Oh, goody.
- Yeah, she just wasn't for me.
- And let me guess, I am?
- Well, I mean maybe- - Save it.
I'm gonna save you from the embarrassment
of making a fool of yourself.
I'm not even remotely interested in you at all.
- But you don't even know me.
- Well, I would say in a way I know you quite well,
certainly better than Cami ever did, excuse me.
- Busted .
- Oh, wonderful, if you're here to gloat don't, okay.
Today's not the day to mess with me.
- No, I just wanted to come and say I'm sorry
and that you deserve much better.
- Don't mess with me.
- No seriously, think about all the ways you've been acting,
trying to hold onto someone that isn't the best for you.
And I think you knew it deep down inside,
that's why you were holding on so tight
and it almost made you a whole different person.
- You don't know anything about me or who I am as a person.
- I know what a head over heels girl in love
with the wrong man looks like.
My sisters are going through it now
and I'm gonna be patient with them.
There was a time when I was so obsessed
with someone I wanted to be with.
I was so infatuated with him
that I couldn't see myself not being with him,
but God had other plans
and He showed me how miserable my life would have been
with someone who seemed to look good
and seemed to be the best for me.
But in reality, I just didn't have a clear
and raw picture of my life,
Just like they talked about at Bible study.
- I almost don't even care anymore.
What's an amazing Godly man gonna wanna do with me now,
my sins and flaws and all?
- Yeah, I used to think that way too.
I was so obsessed with what I thought was realistic,
I left no room for faith.
I realized if you're genuinely pursuing God,
then at that point,
you really have no excuse to not trust Him.
- What if God wants me to be single for the rest of my life?
- I may not be mature enough to bring my 2 cents,
but we live in a world where we blame everything on God,
our failures, the devil's schemes.
If you were to be single for the rest of your life,
it's not because God didn't bring you anybody.
In the Bible, it says,
"Delight yourself in the Lord and He'll give you the desires
"of your heart."
So if it's your desire to get married,
ask God and pursue it.
That's just my thoughts.
- You're right, that makes perfect sense, thank you.
I guess I was just so obsessed with him
that I lost who I was along the way.
It's not me.
Listen, I'm so sorry about the way I've acted in the past.
It's not who I am.
I was just obsessed with him
that I kind of lost myself along the way.
I've been a completely different person.
- Friends? - Friends.
- So how has the new school been?
- It's awesome, I get free coffee,
get to skip class and get to talk about my life all day.
It's pretty great.
- Wow.
- That's coming to a close very soon.
- For real?
Fine.
- Oh, the drama.
- It's definitely been a wild semester so far.
- Well, I definitely wanna hear all about it.
Are you girls done?
You look like you're done.
- Yeah, I am. - Me too.
- I mean, I could always go for more .
- Pig.
- Go ahead and enjoy some more.
Clean up when you're done.
Your aunt and I need to talk.
- Ooh, that sounds serious.
Wait a second,
does that mean that they're gonna clean up in my kitchen?
This is great.
You girls growing up is definitely to my benefit.
Does this mean
I don't get them Christmas presents this year?
- No, what? - What?
- No, no. - No.
- No, no, no, no, no, no.
- No, I'm kidding.
I already bought you presents.
Are you kidding me.
You gotta wait for them.
Okay, this is big tonight.
- So do you always have to decorate
for Christmas before Thanksgiving?
- Yes, I do always have to decorate
for Christmas before Thanksgiving.
- Put your foot down.
- Why are you all up in my business?
- Because I'm always up in your business.
- Oh, well, you know I'm about to get up
in your business too.
Are you gonna go to church with the girls on Sunday?
- I'm just still trying
to debate whether I should go or not.
- So why?
- Well, I'm glad they're going,
but I just feel like it's too late for me.
They don't need a divorced woman
at the church justified or unjustified.
- I talked to Ralph and Yvette at small group on Wednesday
and I feel like they're both the starting to understand
and see what's happening to us.
I even pulled Yvette aside and I'm like,
"What have we become?"
It just seems like ever since that incident
with a youth pastor,
we've been making more and more rash decisions
in the church
and it is causing a lot of division.
And I just say all that to say, I mean,
God is your ultimate authority, not the church leadership,
not your boss at work.
And if you know that you're right with God,
it gives you the ability to forgive people
who are just being dumb humans.
Can only see things from their own perspective,
and they're not 100% right about anything.
Even when I told you about what happened with Pastor Smith,
whatever it is that our church is dealing with,
whether it's weakened leadership or people are overreacting
because of past experiences.
And it doesn't change God's love or affection for you,
but I feel like deep down, maybe you feel like it does.
- But, what about what they said?
Like I'm not fighting
for my marriage like it's all my fault?
- Well, I mean, I grew up with you and I think we both know
that you are perfectly capable of fighting
and I don't even remember one instance
when you were wrong.
- Okay, yeah, yeah.
- And has anything ever been your fault?
No, nothing has ever been your fault.
Oh come on, I mean, you know what I felt about Bill?
I mean, I know you were sick of his lies.
I was sick of his lies.
I mean, it's not fair what he did to you, church did to you.
I mean, it's not fair that you have
to go through a divorce without your church family,
or start over again in a new town,
a new job, the new school for the girls,
just all of it, single parenting.
But it does remind me of what mom always used to say.
She said, "Pray for a spirit of unselfishness
"even if you don't feel like you've been selfish."
What?
- Well, you know about my new company,
how we buy, sell land, property venues?
- Right.
- Well, somehow our company started to do business
with the owner of the plot of land
that owns some businesses, including the church.
So I requested for that building to be torn down
and the document just came in this week
and all it needs is my signature.
- Okay well, please tell me that you did not sign that.
- No, instead I signed a check for a donation
to Pastor Smith
and I set that document aside,
maybe to think about it for later.
- Okay well, please just tell me you're gonna tear it up
and throw it away.
- Yes I am. - Okay, good.
I mean, you just have to pray for a way to move past this.
I mean, the girls need you.
I can tell Kayla, she has some abandonment issues.
I know she's getting some help from the church,
but still, it's still affecting them.
It's affecting all of them and you and me, mostly me.
- Yes. - And that's what matters.
Oh yeah, that in itself is just a thing.
Whatever, I always forget about that.
I love you sis. - I love you too.
Thank you. - Oh, thank you.
- Are you still talking to him?
- What makes you think you have the right
to constantly be in my business?
- I've been your best friend all your life.
I've always been up in your business and you in mine.
What's so different about now?
- I just wanna make my own decisions
and stop being treated like I'm some dumb little girl
that doesn't know what's best for her.
- You know just as well as I do,
people our age don't make good decisions without guidance.
Let's face it,
neither of us have been the same since dad left.
Shoot, the only one that's been normal is Caitlyn.
- Caitlyn doesn't count.
I mean, look at her, everything's a joke to her.
Just like the counselor says, she's suppressing it.
- Maybe she just chooses joy over dwelling and sadness.
You can make the choice to let your experiences define you.
You can choose to believe that all your new friends
from church are gonna one day leave you
or you can trust that God will bring people into your life,
some permanent and some for a season
and it's your job not to run them off.
- You can't trust anyone to stay.
- Yes, you can.
Kayla, just just know that God is there
even when others cannot be.
Just concentrate on you there for others.
Think about it, are you perfect?
Do you care for Cami at school?
- What?
No way.
- She's a friend of mine now.
Very much so.
I'll explain later.
- What happened?
- Braiden broke up with her and I took the chance to...
- What? - Show her compassion.
That's all I felt for her was compassion.
I prayed that God would help me see her through His eyes.
- Was it hard?
- It was until I prayed that prayer.
- Dear God, why am I doing this to myself?
You've always been so faithful to me, but out of my anger,
I've turned my back on You.
I'm sorry, please forgive me
for all the wrong decisions I have made
that has led me to sin.
Heal my heart and help me to trust You
and get me back on the path that leads
to life, righteousness and joy
that I know only truly comes from You.
Help me to love my family
and thank You for my sisters and my mom.
And just help me to love and appreciate them.
I know I haven't been the easiest person to be around,
but help me to change that.
Heal me Lord.
I'm sorry I've been so rude and impossible to deal with.
- We knew you'd come around.
- It's been hard on all of us.
We love you.
And you know God will see us through.
- Whose flowers are these?
Girls, who got these flowers?
- I did, mom.
- Why?
They're beautiful, my favorite, pink roses.
But why did you get them?
- Because you've always been there for me.
You're the strongest person I know.
- You are an awesome daughter.
Thank you Megan.
I love you.
- I love you too.
- And you've always been there for me too.
- Kayla, didn't think we'd forget you
on your special day did you Miss. Kayla?
- We're taking you out to dinner.
You can't say no.
- Oh, I know just the place.
- Happy birthday. - Thank you, wow.
- Oh, look at that?
That is so sweet.
Do you think they'd mind if I took a video?
Just the creepy aunt in the background?
- Not at all. - Of the sweet moment.
- It's so good to see Kayla happy.
- Oh, it's precious, love it.
- Well, I have the check
to give to you to give to Pastor Smith at your church.
- Well, you know what?
I am having dinner with him and his wife tonight.
Do you wanna join us? - Okay, we'll be there.
- Awesome.
- Well, we regret not having a chance
to really get to know you better while we were there,
but just this whole experience, it's taken us by storm.
- It sure has.
- But, I accepted a new position down,
what, a couple of hours South of here to a new church
so all is well with us.
Just wish God would have chose a less dramatic way
of moving us on .
- We all do.
- But we have learned so much through this whole experience.
I mean, we sure have.
- Oh, so have we.
- Really, tell us about it?
- I've been through a lot.
When my husband left me, it crushed me.
I mean, really crushed me.
And the hardest part was that the church didn't help.
I just needed someone to be there for me
and to encourage me.
I just needed to be strong for my kids.
Wanna know how I did it?
- Absolutely.
- Oh, we really wanna hear it, yes.
- With the help of someone very close to me
who helped me push past my pain.
I started to just abide in the Lord.
I started to press into the Lord and spend time alone
with Him and reading His word.
The Lord minister to me personally in my quiet time
and let me realize He was still in control
even in the midst of my loneliness.
And you know what I found out?
God did not forsake me.
When the church shunned me, that wasn't God,
that was just fallen people blinded by their own opinions.
But God, He accepted me, and He loved me,
and He forgave me and He encouraged me to get back up again.
That is the power of Jesus.
- Amen. - Amen.
- I'm so sorry you went through all that.
- We didn't realize all that was happening
to you at our church, but I praise God that the Lord,
He's been ministering
to you the same way He's been ministering to us.
- Hey there, I'm Kyle.
I'm Pastor Harold's son.
I hear you used to go to our church.
How have we not met before?
- I don't know.
- Okay, time to go.
- Yup, got some more gifts to open.
- Caitlyn, Kayla where do you think you guys are going?
I'm talking to you.
Come back here.
Guys, I'm serious.
- You'll thank me later.
- Oh my gosh.
Oh, no you were not.
Hi, I'm Megan.
- Hi.
- All right everybody,
it's time for Kayla to give her birthday speech tonight.
- Speech, speech, speech, speech, speech.
- Speech, speech, speech, speech.
speech, speech, speech, speech.
- Okay, okay, okay.
Well, thank you all for coming and for the presents.
And thank you for just being there for me.
As most of you know,
I'm going through a really hard time.
I appreciate how supportive
and accepting you've all been to me.
It means more to me than you know.
God is healing me and He's showing me how faithful He is.
This has been an amazing evening.
Your encouragement has showed me
that even when you're hurting, God can give you hope again.
Now let's see some cake!
- You can do a little turn maybe?