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(GUNFIRE AND MORTAR SHELLS EXPLODE)
- Hang on! Hang in there!
Stay with me!
- You’re gonna get yourself killed, Sergeant. Just drop me and go!
- Oh hell no!
Medic! Man down!
(“MEDIC!” ECHOES QUIETLY)
(SOFT SAD VIOLIN MUSIC)
(TRAFFIC AND SIRENS)
- (Gabe) Matt! Hey, you’re really gonna ignore me
when I’m speaking directly to you?
Do you at least have it on you?
- (Matt) Look, you get disability, what’re you doing living on the streets, okay?
- You don’t know I’m on the streets, do you?
- Well, where else are you?
- Well, I’m not, all right?
- Well, what are you doing around here all the time?
- I’m just here for pay day. I could change my mailing address
but it’d be a hassle, you know?
- I don’t want you to change your address, just...
at least it helps us to...
- Helps us to what, Matt?
- I don’t know! Look, I gotta go in there, I gotta do payroll, okay?
See you around, Gabe.
(QUIET CRICKETS)
- (Jess) I don’t deserve you.
You know you’re too good to me.
- (Maggie) I’m my own women’s movement.
I learned it from your mother.
- She thinks old men are little boys with whiskers.
- She’s right.
And wrong.
And somewhere in between.
- We have been in the middle of nowhere for far too long.
- I just want to make sure you’re okay.
(CELL PHONE VIBRATES)
- Twenty-two missed calls from Mo. Hi Mo.
(MO RECITING IN HEBREW)
(MO CONTINUES TO RECITE IN HEBREW)
ba-agalau-vizman kariv, v'imru. Amen.
- (Molly, in Hebrew) Amen!
- There’s nothing worse than a mother having to bury her child.
And here in my hands, I hold the departed--
Just a moment, please.
Molly Herskovitz has asked me to read her account of Barney’s final moments.
(URN CLINKS ON STONE)
- “My Barney loved romping with his school-chums"
"in the whitewater of Long Island Sound.”
“He was on his way home from the beach one day"
"and just as he arrived, I happened to look out the window"
"to see a giant flock of herring gulls swoop down from the sky"
"to peck and ravage my poor Barney.”
(Molly cries)
“I watched in horror as they lifted him up off the ground"
"feasting on his flesh."
"I knew I had to save him from those flying... birds"
"so I rushed outside in my robe, hoping to scare them away"
"but I was too late."
"My little babushka had gotten out through a hole in the screen door."
"The one I meant to fix after 9/11."
"Anyhow they carried most of him out to sea"
"though I was able to save a hind leg and and microchip.”
(MO GARGLES)
(ZOEY CHUCKLES)
- I thought you loved dogs.
- (Zoey) I do.
But what I saw today transcended… everything.
- Well, I got paid seven hundred dollars, in advance, thank God,
for that little canine kaddish.
- I would’ve buried the urn next to the husband.
- You can’t bury an inked Jew.
Barney had an ID tattoo.
- (Zoey) So many rules.
No wonder guilt runs so rampant with you people.
- “You people”. Always with the “you people”.
You do realize you’re going to have to start saying “our people”?
- Is that so?
- What’s the tally of no-no’s you never said no to?
- I rarely say no to you.
- Only to the big ticket items.
- Not to converting.
- Yeah? And it’s a very big deal.
(ZOEY GIGGLES) Wait, wait, Jesus!
- What? Just working up some cardio.
- No shit.
- Why are Jewish boys so good in bed?
- Maybe we’re grateful for the opportunity.
(BLUESY ROCK MUSIC PLAYS)
(MAGICAL SHIMMER)
(BLUESY ROCK MUSIC CONTINUES)
- Last call, Simon.
- One more for the road.
- You live across the street.
- Did you know Johnny Walker works as a stool softener?
- So that’s what he’s been doing up there.
- (Fan) Excuse me, can I get a selfie?
Thanks.
(BEETHOVEN’S “PATHETIQUE” SONATA)
- ( DOG) Nope. No.
(A KNOCK AT THE DOOR)
Come on in, Mary.
- How’d you know it was me?
- Actors always let them know when you’re coming.
- Hi baby.
- How was the show tonight?
- Fine, except my understudy gave my notice.
- Hmm.
Nobody can literally live up to most of this stuff.
- For instance?
- You can’t touch the skin of a pig.
So what, no Super Bowl?
- (Dog) It says--
you can’t mix colors of thread under penalty of stoning.
- Betsy Ross, what a whore.
- Right?
(Dog) Sorry, excuse me, baby. Can’t find...
Ah.
“Wherefore I will yet plead with you, sayeth the Lord,"
"and your children’s children will I plead.”
I mean, how do you translate this stuff?
(BOOMING CLUB MUSIC, STREET SOUNDS)
- (Gabe) Hey man.
Got a few bucks for food?
- (Eli) For food? Yeah right, you’re in front of a bar.
- Book by its cover, man.
(Gabe) Then again, so are you.
I know you’re not that much of a dick.
- You’re wrong.
- Then again, you wouldn’t last a day in my shoes.
(FAINT STREET SOUNDS)
- (Joe) Yo, anybody in there?
- Dog doesn’t pay you enough for what some broads are doing in there.
(STREET SOUNDS)
- (Eli) Hey, excuse me?
Hey.
- (Matt) What’s the other guy look like?
- Not as bad as the guy who needs a drink.
- It’s 2:30. Last call.
Come in with me, I do their books.
(MURMUR) - (Matt) You're good.
- (Simon) Yo Matt.
- I finished your taxes.
- Am I getting anything back?
- Oh, uh, make yourself at home. - Thanks.
Oh, where’s the head?
- Over there.
- (Lilly) I’ll watch it for you.
- Thanks.
- I’m too old for you.
- Oh, sorry, ma’am.
- I’m not chopped liver either
and you look like hell for a very good reason.
(HAUNTING, OMINOUS MUSIC)
(THUNDER)
(WHIP LASHES, ELI YELLS)
- (Joe) Oh my God.
- It’s not as bad as it looks.
- Yeah, that’s… worse.
(Joe) Is there anything I can do?
- Yeah, you can get out.
Get out!
(DOOR SHUTS)
- Hey, boss!
- (Jess) Hey Joe.
- I thought you got a soap.
- (Joe) I did. Two days.
- (Jess) Hey, that’s great, right?
- Day number one I was Short Cop #2
day number two I was Short Homeless Guy #1.
(Joe) I make more pimping out Mo for bargain brisses.
(MAGGIE LAUGHS)
- So tell me, what happened?
You get schmeissed from the Garden of Eden?
- I don’t know what that means, and I know everything.
- I keep telling you, if you fall short,
you’re gonna get your ass kicked again.
- Yeah. Matt doing payroll?
- Yeah.
So tell me, how was your trip?
- Fantastic. Hot sun, sand, clear blue water,
girl with a little something extra.
- Good. Great.
But I need you back here, bro.
- Yeah.
Well, how about some hoops?
- We got the guys?
- Yeah, no, I don’t know.
Hi, I’m Jess.
- I’ll alert the media.
- Don’t just stand there, judge me.
- I’m a lover, not a judger.
- Uh huh.
And how much trouble has that gotten you into?
- A lot. That’s why I had to get away.
- I dunno, man.
I think you leaving whenever the hell you feel like it
tells me that you can’t be counted on.
(JESS SIGHS)
- Is that how it’s gonna be now?
- Look.
Whatever it is I was going through,
Maggie got me through it.
- I want to believe that.
I really do.
I’m worried about you, Jess.
- You just can’t help yourself, can you?
You always have to make my problems your problem.
- (Mo) Yes.
I do.
I’m your brother.
And I will always have your back.
And what’s in front too.
Do you understand?
- Yes.
- That’s what makes us a great team, you know.
For better or worse.
(MELANCHOLY ROCK MUSIC)
- (Jess) All right, last call, coming up.
- (Eli) Again?
- There’s the door. Or what can we get you?
- What do you suggest?
- I make the best ten dollar Gibsons in the Tri-State area.
- All right.
- Gin or vodka?
- Vodka. Gin’s depressing.
- No, we don’t want that now, do we, Eli?
- Do I know you?
- I’m hurt. You don’t remember me?
Jess, 54 Below, couple years back.
- I was doing a lot of shit back then.
- So that you could’ve met God?
You got a case for that fiddle?
- Yeah, but I was in a hurry.
- (Joe) Hey, I’m up for the role of Short Junkie #3 on SVU.
- (Woman) I’m a short junkie.
- (Jess) Here you go. - Thanks.
- (Mo) It’s a good one. As God is my witness.
- So, uh...
I don’t suppose there was any way at all that you could’ve ducked?
(MOZART’S DON GIOVANNI OVERTURE PLAYS)
(DOOR OPENS)
- Dad.
- Ah, you’re back.
- Yeah.
- This guy Thoreau was an agnostic.
- Yeah, there’s a lot of that going around, Dad.
You got us a dive bar.
- It’s really not. You and Mo like to romanticize alcoholism.
- Yeah. Keeping the faith is white-washing.
- Hey Jess? Wait a minute, wait.
(Dog) Come listen.
Just for a minute.
(DON GIOVANNI ACT 1 SCENE 1 PLAYS)
♪ Notte e giorno faticar ♪
- “Night and day I slave for one who does not appreciate it.”
“I put up with wind and rain--”
- “I eat and sleep badly.”
It’s not that different from Latin, Dad.
You remember when you used to take me to the Metropolitan Opera
when I was little?
- The original building was a grand structure. It’s gone now.
- Yeah, but we sat so high. - Yeah.
Third balcony?
Because we couldn’t afford better tickets.
But I still heard every note. Every lyric.
You and me. Every Tuesday.
We’d watch Verdi, Puccini, Wagner, and this one by Mozart.
And I would cry, and one time you asked me, “Why?”
What’d I say?
- “Mozart speaks my language.”
- Mozart speaks my language.
Hey Jess?
- (Jess) I’m sorry.
(DISTANT SIRENS, CITY NOISE)
(PIANO PLAYS)
(PIANO CONTINUES)
(HONKING AND TRAFFIC)
♪ It’s a quarter to three ♪
♪ There’s no one in the place ♪
♪ Except you and me ♪
♪So set them up, Joe ♪
♪ I got a little story ♪
♪ I think you ought to know ♪
♪ We’re drinking, my friend ♪
♪ to the end ♪
♪ of a brief episode ♪
♪ So make it one for my baby ♪
♪ and one more for the road ♪
♪ I know the routine ♪
♪ So put another nickel ♪
♪ In that there machine ♪
- Arthur Miller did it like this.
I write my first drafts on a legal pad,
and then I hand it off to my secretary.
- You don’t use a laptop?
- I remember when a laptop was an aspiring actress.
- Today you can get into trouble for even saying that.
(SIMON CHUCKLES)
♪ Joe, I know you’re getting ♪
♪ anxious to close ♪
♪ so make it ♪
♪ one for my baby ♪
♪ and one more for the road ♪
♪ that long... ♪
- ♪ that long… ♪
- ♪ man it’s long… ♪
♪ It’s a long, long, long road. ♪
- Bravo, that was beautiful.
- Thank you, baby.
(INDISTINCT MURMUR)
What’s his story?
- I don’t know yet.
- Hi, can I take a selfie please?
- (Mary) Of course.
- Who’s she?
- Mary Frasier King. Broadway legend.
Wowing them for a year in Hillary: The Musical.
- And she comes to this dive bar?
- (Mary) Hey, if you were playing that woman eight times a week,
you’d come here too.
- This is the best bar in New York.
Been around for decades, original owners, everyone’s family.
- I’m Mary, I gave birth to the bartender.
- Nice to meet you, ma’am.
- Simon, mind if I join you?
- Sure, although I wasn’t counting on any positivity tonight.
- (Mary) Oh don’t fret. I’m sure you’ll figure out a way
to lower that bar you have inside your head.
- This is my third martini and I don’t feel a thing.
- Things kick in when they’re supposed to--
- Hey!
(Eli) Your Gibson’s kinda weak!
- Let’s take care of that.
- It’s straight Stoli, pal. Sip it, you’ll feel it.
- Beautiful instrument. Yours? - Um-hmm.
- How long you been married?
- Three years. Can’t get out of it.
You know what, that drink’s fine.
- Who hit him?
- So what happened to your back?
- Your plumber’s got a big mouth.
- Yeah, we’re family here.
But Stevie Wonder could see your welts.
- (Simon) Not everyone comes in for the perks.
- Sure they do.
- I love this place, kid. You know why?
I can sit in my corner, I can drink when I’m thirsty,
I can nurse myself when I’m hungover,
I can write, and I can wallow
by myself.
I’m not sad, I just like looking that way.
And you leave me alone because we’re cut from the same cloth
and no one has to know but you and me.
They’re a match made in heaven.
- (Jess) Yeah, that worked out well for me.
(CELLPHONE RINGS)
- You pick the shittiest places to hide.
- I’m not hiding, ‘cause nobody’s looking.
See, not even you.
- Where’s your sponsor?
- Six feet under.
(Jess) He blew his brains out.
But he was sober though, so…
maybe if he’d had a hit or something, huh?
(CLANG)
- Oops.
(JESS LAUGHS)
- What a waste.
- No, it’s fine, it’s right here.
Oh, you meant me.
C’mon, Mo, stay. Give your shit a shot.
- How can I look up to you?
Huh?
- Fuck me, is that what I’m here for?
- I thought so.
- Yeah, that’s pressure I can’t handle.
Sorry.
(OMINOUS, EERIE MUSIC)
- Did you want me to stop you?
- Probably.
But I’m not disappointed that you didn’t.
- Of course not.
You know I’m gonna cover for you.
- Hooray.
I just started again.
And I can stop again too.
Believe me.
I swear to God—
- Don’t do that.
Just… don’t do that.
It belittles us both.
- I bought this place for my sons
and they named it after me.
- Dog. It’s a nickname, right?
- Nothing gets past you.
You had enough? - No.
The more I drink the less I feel.
- (Dog) Is that the point?
- Things hurt less.
Do I have to go?
- Well, last call was last call.
- Hey, what’s your play about?
- Dry divers.
(Simon) You know, like, uh--
Ahhhhh, splat.
- (Dog) No change of heart on the way down
you know what I mean?
- (Simon) The other day I asked my ex-wife
if she thought the world would be a better place
without me in it.
I wasn’t a great husband.
The question made her cry.
Why is that, you think?
- Well…
maybe because you asked, and
you’d thought about it.
- Oh.
- It happens to men.
- (Mo) What happened to you, he means.
- I should’ve ordered shots.
- Dog sometimes bends the rules, but...
you're not driving. (KEYS JINGLE)
- Are they mine?
- Sleight of hand.
- (Zoey) Jess wouldn’t serve you another unless you gave them up.
- (Eli) I didn’t give them up.
- (Mo) Whoops.
- (Maggie) Well, let’s just say you did.
I mean, what’s the big deal?
- (Jess) Thanks, babe.
- (Eli) You two together?
- (Simon) All four of them are in love.
Yeah, I don’t wanna know about that.
- (Jess) Play something.
What would you do with this guy, Mo?
- Get him to do something with his hands that doesn’t hurt.
- I didn’t twist his arm.
(ELI PLAYS HIS VIOLIN)
- Can I hand it off?
- I’m counting on it.
(ELI STOPS PLAYING)
(PENCIL SCRIBBLING)
- Jesus!
- (Matt) You're out of here, buddy!
(ELI GROANS)
- Let him go, Matt.
- (Matt) Look at your face, someone ought to kick your ass.
- You picked a bad night to call me out!
- (Matt) Let’s see!
- What are you looking at?!
- Dummy, I was moved, I had to write!
And I almost broke through. This much.
In my world, above my head,
a lightbulb only needs to be this small.
An idea at a quarter to three is what I live for.
- (Simon) Your music, what you’re doing to that punched-out face of yours…
suck it up and get a drink.
- I, uh...
I gotta be somewhere.
- It’s good for you to be here.
- You play a mean violin.
- I hate that adjective.
- Depends on the context, right?
- It shouldn’t, mean is mean.
- It’s not supposed to happen to guys.
- A woman did that to you?
- When wives beat their husbands, no one wants to believe it.
- May I get a closer look?
It’s okay.
Those new ones are bad.
You should go to a hospital.
- Well then they’ll know what happened.
- Just like when I was in the chorus of Brigadoon.
Ah, not a lot of people have heard of it. Joe has.
(Mary) He was a Newsie, and a Pippin.
But what’s that got to do with the price of rice and Arty Skoller?
- (Eli) Excuse me?
- (Mary) Arty kept falling in the orchestra pit during the blackouts,
’cause he was blind in one eye.
But that was a lie, and we all knew it.
David Brooks played Tommy, the star part,
but he was a damn bully and he kept pushing Arty in,
because Arty was a better dancer.
We all asked Arty,
why don’t you just tell the stage manager,
or quit, or kick his ass.
Hell, we’ll do it for you if you don’t want to,
but all Arty kept saying is,
“I’m blind in one eye!”
After months of the cello player breaking his fall,
I took him aside
and I said “Jesus, Arty,"
“you still got your other eye.”
- You can do something about almost anything.
- You’re very stealthy.
- (Simon) Aren’t they all?
- How did it happen, Eli?
- (Eli) I gotta go.
- If you go, you don’t get back in.
- (Mo) The bar is a temple.
- (Mo) I’m a rabbi.
Bring your Camels.
- (Eli) I’m not a very good Jew.
- (Mo) Bring them anyway.
- Mo knows I hate it as much as when he hides it.
- You see Matt over there?
(Jess) Works his butt off for us.
We can’t pay him what he deserves.
But he loves it when he surprises us
with a tax refund we didn’t expect.
I asked him about it and you know what he said?
- What?
- He said, when we do good deeds,
we shouldn’t sound trumpets for ourselves
like the hypocrites do in the streets.
(Jess) But what we should do
is a little secret something for ourselves.
- What’s that got to do with Mo?
- Well if Mo can somehow pull off
being all holy and a regular guy
the man deserves to bum a smoke
especially when he thinks not even you know about it.
- (Mo) Hey, you play?
- (Eli) I thought you wanted to bum a smoke.
You’ve got some serious game.
- (Mo) Too bad I don’t make some serious money.
- You know, it’s weird.
I’ve been drinking all night
and I don’t feel a thing.
- (Mo) Well, it’s been a long night and-- - Yeah.
You started long before you got here.
- Wait, how do you know when I started?
- (Mo) I know how much a guy drinks when he said he started a month ago.
- (Jess) Hey! You!
Yeah, you with the big fat eye!
She doesn’t beat you ’cause you drink.
- (Dog) Let’s have it.
We’re all in.
- (Eli) Out on the street,
there was this cold snap from the Hudson.
But it’s warm here.
- (Jess) I know. Spooky, ain’t it?
- (Jess) All right. - (Eli) Let’s do this.
- (Mo) All right, It’s gonna be you and me
versus him and Dog.
- (Jess) Fine by me. Dad?
- (Dog) I’m game.
- Okay, now why don’t I like these odds?
- (Dog) Don’t worry about it.
- (Eli) Okay, is this guy a chip off the old block?
- (Jess) Yeah, the chip didn’t get the height.
- (Mo) That’s the good thing about being adopted.
- (Jess) Hey, you’re no Kobe either.
- (Mo) Shoot!
- (Dog) You okay?
- Sorry.
It’s been a rough few days.
- Why’d she do it?
- Who else knows? - No one.
It was the Mozart Concerto Number 3.
- Beautiful piece.
- (Jess) Was it playing when she hit you?
- I play it every time I try to sleep.
- Same part? Over and over?
- (Eli) Um-hmm.
- (Jess) When you hear it, what’s it sound like?
- At first it’s choppers
and then there’s gunfire.
- Dribble, but show us.
- (Mo) There it is.
The eyes have it.
- My head turned every which way... (DISTANT HELICOPTERS)
I saw the choppers above the sand and the rocks.
One was on fire... (HELICOPTER ROTORS SPINNING)
and the other was spinning out of control. (HELICOPTER ROTORS SPINNING)
- Its tail section spitting smoke,
the blades breaking apart on impact.
- Wait, how do you guys know so much about this?
- (Jess) We’ve been where you are.
- There were horrible screams of men coming from inside.
The other chopper was on the other side of the dune.
Then two of your guys rushed over.
One of them was you.
- (Jess) You were blind.
- The sand.
- I reached in to free him...
(DISTANT EXPLOSIONS)
...and I finally got to his harness.
I yanked it up, and it was...
- Tommy.
(DISTANT EXPLOSIONS AND GUNFIRE)
- The flames took over.
You pulled the pilot, your friend
from the Huey...
(DISTANT EXPLOSIONS)
- Tommy?
- C’mon Tommy!
(CONSTANT GUNFIRE AND EXPLOSIONS THROUGHOUT)
Stay with me, stay with me!
- You’re gonna get yourself killed, Sergeant! Drop me, drop me and go!
- Hell no! Medic! Medic!
Man down! Man down!
(INDISTINCT GROANING)
- I’m sorry, Sergeant.
He’s lost too much blood, there’s nothing I can do.
- There must be something you can do!
(LOUD EXPLOSION)
- He knows his job, buddy.
- It’s gonna be all right, it’s gonna be all right.
- We can’t stay here, I gotta go, I gotta make a nine-line!
(HUGE EXPLOSION)
- No! Not yet! Not yet!
- It’s all right! Get your hands off me
I’m here to help.
- (Chaplain) I’m here, son. - (Eli) Stay with me, man.
- (Medic) I can’t save everyone.
He won’t let go unless you do.
- (Tommy) I guess it’s my turn. Is it that simple?
- Yeah, it is. What’s your name, Sergeant?
- Caplan. Thomas Caplan.
- (Chaplain) All right, Caplan, we’re here.
- Eli? - Yeah buddy. Yeah, I'm here.
- Take care of her, okay? Take care of my girl.
Tell her what happened so she doesn’t take it out on you.
(SAD DRAMATIC MUSIC)
(ELI CRIES)
- (Chaplain) Doc.
- (Eli) When I got back, I looked her up like Tommy asked.
Told her what went down.
Of course she went to pieces.
She leaned on me, and I leaned on her and...
but we took it slow.
We were lonely, so...
we took it further.
- (Jess) But you had the music. All she had was you.
- (Mo) That’s what comes from throwing caution to the wind.
- Passion is carnivorous.
- (Mary) Hmm.
- I think you and me really pulled something off here, baby.
Cheers.
- Cheers, baby.
- Cheers, brother.
- Oh, it’s, uh, behind the owl. I moved it.
- You’re branching out on me.
- Say when.
- When. - (Jess) Wrong.
(MO CHUCKLES)
- You sure you wanna be complicit?
- Shhhh, not so loud, bro.
That’s what nightcaps and enablers are for.
- So what’s with the Camels?
- What’s with the heroin?
- Well we can’t all be the mighty Moses.
You know, me and Maggie
we didn’t put shoes or socks on for two weeks.
- Yeah, must’ve been nice.
Unless it cramped your habit, of course.
- It didn’t.
‘Cause I didn’t need it.
- But you did tonight, right?
- I was here tonight.
I’m gonna be fine, Mo. I’m gonna be fine.
- Have I been a good brother?
- The best.
- I want you to stop.
- Okay.
- And you need to talk to Maggie.
- Okay.
- And Dog too.
- What’re you doing to me here?
- Dog made us brothers, and it’s still confusing.
- It’s pretty schizophrenic, right?
- So what happens when the jig is up?
- If that happens, it’s supposed to, right?
So let’s shut her down for awhile, huh?
- We can’t. Not yet.
We gotta go back, Mo.
(UP-TEMPO MUSIC BEGINS TO BUILD)
(POP MUSIC, BAR CHATTER)
- You know him?
- Yeah, we grew up together, awhile ago.
Kinda like you and Mo.
- How long’s it been?
- Fifteen years, probably.
Didn’t even know he was in the military.
- You should go talk to him. It’s almost last call.
- Yeah, I’m gonna wait till the girl splits.
- Why don’t you just tell him to lose the beard?
What’d I say?
- Gay people don’t always dig that term.
- How would you know?
- Me and Mary were at Stonewall.
We told Jess, and now Jess is telling him.
- It’s just good parenting from the Left.
(GABE LAUGHS)
- Mommy needs another one, dear. - (Mo) Coming up.
- (Mary) Thank you, love.
- Fifteen years. Probably doesn’t even remember you.
- Matt!
- Gabe? - Yeah, man.
- Holy crap, man, how’s it going?
- (Gabe) Fleet Week, right? - Yeah, right right right.
- I had no idea, what’re you up to?
- (Matt) Oh, well, I’m an accountant. - (Gabe) Accountant?
What happened to Broadway, I thought that’s what you were
doing in New York.
- I’m in and out of shows and tours
but if I don’t become Hugh Jackman, maybe Fed Chair?
(BOTH CHUCKLE)
- This is awesome, where do you live around here?
- Oh, I'm not too far. You got a hotel room for the night?
Wanna catch up, hang out?
- Yeah, that’d actually be great. You got any coke or pot or...?
- Um... I’ve got some medical marijuana.
- Oh, medical, huh? - Yeah, back pain, took a fall.
- Cool. Not the fall.
Let’s do it. - Yeah, let’s go.
- (Gabe) I don’t do coke much, man, but you know, it’s Fleet Week, so...
- (Matt) Sure, sure. - Gabe) No holds barred.
- (Matt) That’s what they all say.
- Thank you.
- (Matt) The pot doesn’t come this way.
I roll it. (GABE CHUCKLES)
- (Gabe) Hey, that’s you and, uh... Janice Holt.
- Yeah, yeah, she was hot.
Who’d you take?
- Faye Summers.
- Mmmm, nice.
- Damn, you look the exact same. You know that?
- No. - (Gabe) No really, you do. I'm serious.
What about me?
- Well, your uniform, you know, you being a
big boy in the Navy, makes you look...
a little more serious?
- (Gabe) Yep. - Probably about everything, right?
Oh, I’m getting emotional about the past.
- That’s the pot.
- Yeah. Yeah.
You know, I’m gonna crash. C’mon, get up, get up.
- No, no, you take the bedroom, you’re the guest.
- Oh, it’s a big bed.
- (Gabe) I’m used to the upper bunk on board ship.
C’mon. Let’s catch up.
(SOFT, GENTLE MUSIC BUILDS)
- Good morning.
(Gabe) How do you feel about dutch ovens?
- (Matt) What? Oh God no!
♪ Birds flying high You know how I feel ♪
♪ Sun in the sky You know how I feel ♪
- You know, I feel like I love you and I’m happy about that
because I hate musical theater.
- (Matt) Well maybe you should get in here and I’ll stop singing.
- We will never get out if I get in there. - (Matt) Oh c’mon.
I can’t do it without you, and they can’t do it without us.
(Matt) Here, let me get this for you.
- What would anyone do without you?
- Very little.
- All right, let’s not flip out.
- (Gabe) Thank you. - Shoes.
- Where’d you get this stuff, Mo, it’s really good.
- I told you, I got a guy. - You got a guy?
I need his number.
- No you don’t.
- (Dog) Jess, you want some?
- It’s not even legal yet, Dad. - (Dog) Oh c'mon.l
(Dog) These two, oh my god.
- (Mo) All right, just one more.
- (Jess) The ceremony, you couldn’t wait?
- (Dog) We’re just having some fun. - Yeah, c’mon. Loosen up a little.
Oh, they’re coming.
(HANDEL’S "AIR" FROM THE WATER MUSIC SUITE)
(GABE COUGHS)
- Okay.
- Dearly beloved-- (GABE COUGHS)
- (Jess) We are gathered here today
to celebrate the love between Matthew and Gabriel
who have written their own vows.
Matthew?
It was love at first sight
when I saw your sister, I-- - (Dog) What?
(LAUGHTER)
- It took me awhile to realize it had to be you.
But when I caught my ex-wife trying to hook up with you, I--
(LAUGHTER)
- You’re doing schtick.
- Everything is schtick.
- Get to it, will ya?
- (Matt) Okay.
- (Jess) Gabe, would you like to start? - (Matt) Yeah, uh...
that’d be great, would you?
- I can think of a million reasons why I should not marry you,
but I can’t think of one for not loving you
the way that I’ve never loved anyone like this before.
- He’s gonna say, it’s a road best not taken for the fearful.
- There’s no way anyone can guarantee
what’s gonna go down in life or between two people.
But I will never, ever
love a man more than you.
- You know, when I first saw you, I...
I knew that if it was gonna be a man, it was gonna be you.
How can anyone who loves like this not want it all the time?
- This is a road best not taken for the fearful.
But these are two of the bravest souls I have ever met.
You deserve each other.
In front of all of your loved ones gathered here today,
Matthew, Gabriel,
I bless this union.
I now pronounce you married in the eyes of God.
- (Mo, in Hebrew): Baruch Atah Adonai
Eloheinu Melech Ha'Olam.
(GLASS BREAKS)
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
- (in Polish): Nie! Nie!
(INDISTINCT CRYING)
- (Mo) Shalom.
- Cut the crap. I just told my Hebrew teacher
to shut the hell up in her native tongue.
- Zoey, wait, what happened?
- That’s a very ugly woman who’d liked very much to schtoop with you.
That’s the word, right?
- Yeah, but you can’t be serious.
- Mo, let me ask you something.
Why am I the one who’s converting, why aren’t you?
- You want to, I never asked you to.
- Oh really?
Mo, I love you, I wanna marry you
have kids with you, isn’t that enough?
- Babe, this is silly.
- If I don’t go through with this, what happens to us, Mo?
Because I’m not that sure.
I thought I was. I’ve been doing that.
Why can’t I just be me, a God-fearing Catholic?
- Look, I gotta go, it’s couples counseling, it’s Tuesday
we can talk about this later.
- Perfect. Another one of God’s little jests.
- Could be, I’ll make sure to ask him about that later.
(TRAFFIC, CITY SOUNDS)
- (Lilly) Hello, Shakespeare. (CHUCKLES)
Written any good plays lately?
- You tell me.
- Matter of Fact was excellent,
but I don’t remember Ethel Merman looking so enticing.
- What are you talking about, it was Lady Gaga
and she got a Tony Award.
- Oh yes, Lady Gaga,
who was born to be a star, and straddle Bradley Cooper.
- What are you drinking?
- Debonnet, rocks.
- (Man) Ma’am, you know you can’t smoke in bars anymore, right?
- It’s closing time. Beat it, punk.
- (Simon) One Dubonnet, rocks.
- Here, here.
- Yes.
It’s so good to see you.
- It’s good to be seen.
I’m going to be 92 next week. That’s a good age, isn’t it?
- Indeed.
- (Simon) Lilly.
- I’m going to go to sleep... and not wake up.
Where’s your brother?
- He’s in the back, you want me to get him?
- Oh no no no no, I was just wondering.
He’s never really talked to me, you know.
- The wedding, Lilly.
- Oh, that was years ago.
I’d like another Dubonnet, another tiny triple.
- Yes ma’am.
- The memory plays a few tricks sometimes
you understand?
- Sure.
- In my long life, the difference between
a really good boy and a really bad boy
is as wide as any ocean.
- What you got there, Lil?
- Oh, a good boy.
- Don’t I know it.
- (Lilly) I bet. (SHE LAUGHS)
I’ve been coming to this bar for many, many, many years,
but never this late, not ever.
- Last call in the right bar can be very precious, Lil.
- You just said a mouthful.
- It’s my trade, you know?
You don’t really want to go to sleep and not wake up, right?
- Yes and no.
I’ve had a good, long life, but it started out very bad.
- Which camp were you in?
- We weren’t.
They stopped the train, in the middle of nowhere, and they let us run.
- Why?
- For sport.
(OMINOUS MUSIC)
(GUN SHOT)
- (Young Lilly) Papa!
(GUN SHOT)
- (Avram) Lilly, don’t stop, run!
(GUN SHOT)
(HEARTBEAT)
- (Young Lilly) Papa!
Come on, Papa, come on!
- Go!
(GUN SHOT)
(YOUNG LILLY SCREAMS)
(GUN SHOT)
- Shhh, shhhhh...
(GUN SHOTS)
(AVRAM SOBS)
(GUN SHOTS)
(GUN SHOT)
- (Partisan) Come on, girl!
- (Young Lilly) No!
(GUN SHOT)
- (Christian) I’ve got you!
(Christian) We’ll be right behind you.
- (Avram) Lilly, listen.
Go with him.
- (Young Lilly) You will too.
- I’ll be close.
- You’re hurt.
- (Avram) Just a little.
- I can hurry.
- Yeah, but he can hurry better, honey.
(TRAIN WHISTLES IN DISTANCE)
- Is that why we have to go?
- Yes, it’s here to take us to the border.
Make your choice.
(TRAIN GETS CLOSER)
- (Christian) What is her name?
- Lilly.
That’s beautiful.
- You can’t take me with you.
- No.
- What is your name?
- Christian.
Christian.
Take this.
(AVRAM CHANTS IN HEBREW)
- No! Don’t do that.
(GRUNTING)
- I’m already dead.
- Dead men don’t complain.
- Give this to Lilly.
- Give it to her yourself.
- (Mo) This right?
- (Jess) Now it is. - Whoa, hey.
Jesus, Zoey wants kids.
- (Jess) There’s always adoption.
Here, see if these fit.
- All right.
- (Mo) These aren’t gonna fit
I can tell just by looking at them.
- Well, I guess I’m bringing you home
to your natural environment, Yeti.
- How high is this mountain again?
- Just don’t look down.
- How much weight can those ropes hold?
- You’ve been fasting, right?
- (Mo) Hey, I’m coming.
- Keep up. - I’m coming.
- Gabe?
- (Gabe) Yeah, I’m almost there.
- Got it, though? - Yep.
(THEY LAUGH)
- Wow, this is a stunning view.
- Yeah, it’s too perfect.
- There’s no remedy for that.
All right, shall we?
- Yeah.
- You first.
- Listen, just trust me.
Left hand, right there.
- (Jess) It’s solid, you can trust it. There you go.
Now raise your right foot
to match, right there.
Beautiful.
- I don’t like heights.
- This isn’t heights, this is like, ten feet.
- Still not happy.
- ’Course you’re not.
You okay? Keep breathing.
(ROCK BREAKS)
- Whoa, Gabe, Gabe, Gabe!
Don’t pull, don’t-- don’t, don’t pull!
- Matt!
I think we’re gonna need to take a situation assessment here.
- Yeah, you think? You say yours and I’ll say mine.
- Help! Help!
(ECHOING) Please somebody help!
- Help!
(ECHOING) Someone please help!
- Did you hear that?
- (Jess) Time to go, Mo!
- Gabe, Gabe, stop, don’t pull! Don’t pull!
(ROPE CREAKS)
- (Mo) Gabe!
(ROPE CREAKS)
- (Mo/Matt) Gabe, Gabe, what are you doing?
(Mo/Matt) Gabe, Don't! No! Gabe!
- (Mo) Stop! No!
Stop!
Gabe!
(GABE’S BODY HITS THE GROUND)
(BIRDS CHIRP, NATURE SOUNDS)
(TRAFFIC, CITY SOUNDS)
- Matthew.
I don’t like the way you’re carrying on.
- What?
- I don’t like the way he’s carrying on either.
- I do a job here, Dog.
I don’t bring anything else in here but your books. Deal?
- Nah.
- What’s that mean?
- I’m not akin to cruelty.
A single act or lots of it.
- With all due respect, boss, not all of us are akin to you.
- Matthew
come back in.
Please.
- (Jess) Hi Gabe. - (Mo) Hey buddy.
- (Gabe) Whoa whoa, what the hell?
- (Jess) This is happening. - (Gabe) What about my chair?
- (Jess) We’ll take care of it.
- (Gabe) At least run it through a car wash.
I don’t have a complete understanding of what’s happening here.
Oh.
- Did I win the lottery?
- Hurry up, Matt’s almost finished with Dog.
(DOG SIGHS)
- So, now that you’ve shown me how you piss on a rock
hear me out, okay?
If you’re having trouble looking at Gabe
think about how hard it is for him to look at himself.
I think about it every day, what he did for me.
- And how does he know that?
- But he left me!
- Why is that, you think?
- I guess I told him to.
I guess, without telling him to, I...
I guess my loud and clear was pretty quiet.
- Hey.
Progress.
- (Joe) Excuse me, ma’am?
We’re closed.
- Oh, oh. I’m sorry.
- Let me help you. - Oh, thank you.
Joseph, right? - Yes, ma’am.
- You’re a saint.
- Then come follow me.
- Okay.
- You didn’t know? I didn’t know either.
Great place though, huh?
- (Eli) Yeah.
Do you remember me?
- Yes, of course, young man.
- Oh, okay. ’Cause I remember you.
- Well, my memory is not what it used to be
and it’s been quite a while but I’m Lillian.
- I'm Eli.
- You look better.
- Excuse me?
- Better than the last time I saw you.
- Ah. Was it that obvious?
(LILLY LAUGHS)
You’d been punched in the face.
- I thought I’d been a bad little boy.
- Oh, I always say, men are little boys--
(Together) --with whiskers.
- Yes.
Have you had a job tonight?
- Oh, yes, I have.
I play in the pit of the revival of Brigadoon.
- Oh, oh it’s a classic. Very beautiful.
It’s about two hunters who stumble across a remote, tiny Scottish village
that only comes to life every hundred years.
I live over there. - Oh.
Well can I walk you home, Lillian?
- You haven’t done this in awhile, have you, young man?
- What?
- Taken a good woman’s arm. (ELI LAUGHS)
- Oh, you. Remember me?
- I was the dick.
- Yeah.
- (Lilly) Oh, for goodness sake, oh my goodness,
you look so cold, young man. - Oh, I’m okay. Thank you. Okay.
Thank you.
- What are you doing out here so late?
- Just forgot how long it’s been. They locked me out.
- You were there when I was here.
- Yeah, uh, my husband worked there.
- Your husband? Really? Who was that?
- Matthew.
- (Lilly) Oh yes, I remember him.
You do, don’t you, Eli?
- Yeah. That little guy almost kicked my ass.
(GABE LAUGHS) - Like I had it coming, but--
- Yeah, that’s Matt.
Jesus, I just love that about him.
Well, hopefully I’ll see you guys around, okay?
- Wait.
- Thanks.
- I wish I had more.
- This is all your cash? No no,
it’s a rough neighborhood-- - Nope.
- (Gabe) You need to get home. - I insist.
- Don’t worry, I will look after him.
- I wish there was more of this going around. Thank you.
- (Gabe) Good night, guys. - Good luck.
- Where did you get the necklace?
- Oh, um, my father gave it to me,
and his mother gave it to him.
- That would be your-- your grandmother.
- Yes.
- And where is she?
- I have no idea.
When Jews melt down the families scatter.
- They-- they did.
We did.
- But that’s not fair.
- No, Eli, no.
No it’s not fair, but, oh...
(LILLY LAUGHS)
(ELI LAUGHS)
I will you tell you all about her.