WEBVTT FILE 1 00:00:02.000 --> 00:00:07.000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:13.000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:25.627 --> 00:00:27.394 Okay, roll up like a ball. 4 00:00:27.427 --> 00:00:30.130 - Yeah. - This feels super comfortable. 5 00:00:37.170 --> 00:00:38.673 Make space for the baby. 6 00:00:50.117 --> 00:00:51.385 Oh, it's heavy. 7 00:01:14.742 --> 00:01:16.844 You wanna really remember that the baby 8 00:01:16.878 --> 00:01:20.280 is coming out of your vagina and not your face. 9 00:01:20.314 --> 00:01:21.592 Like, imagine you're sitting on the toilet 10 00:01:21.616 --> 00:01:23.283 and you're taking a big poop. 11 00:01:23.317 --> 00:01:26.186 You're face is usually like... 12 00:01:26.219 --> 00:01:27.689 You might be making some tension, 13 00:01:27.722 --> 00:01:29.500 but you're really focusing in down on your bottom. 14 00:01:29.524 --> 00:01:31.158 - Mhm, yeah. - Right? 15 00:01:31.191 --> 00:01:33.160 Next time you pee, just notice what you're doing 16 00:01:33.193 --> 00:01:34.596 with your face. 17 00:01:53.781 --> 00:01:57.217 Is this my pee face? 18 00:01:57.250 --> 00:01:59.319 So, clue me in. 19 00:01:59.353 --> 00:02:01.723 Tell me a little bit about how you're feeling. 20 00:02:01.756 --> 00:02:03.256 Like, how's everything going? 21 00:02:03.290 --> 00:02:04.826 How's it all? 22 00:02:04.859 --> 00:02:07.160 I think pretty good. 23 00:02:07.194 --> 00:02:08.529 Um. 24 00:02:10.430 --> 00:02:12.567 I'm hormonal. 25 00:02:12.600 --> 00:02:14.167 - Mhm. - I do feel like... 26 00:02:17.705 --> 00:02:19.473 Do you have something to say? 27 00:02:19.507 --> 00:02:22.476 We... we had kind of a defcon 3 meltdown 28 00:02:22.510 --> 00:02:24.344 in target the other day. 29 00:02:24.378 --> 00:02:26.313 - It was about car seats. - Yeah. 30 00:02:26.346 --> 00:02:28.348 We read all this stuff online, 31 00:02:28.382 --> 00:02:31.485 all the safety things, all the recommendations, 32 00:02:31.519 --> 00:02:33.521 and... 33 00:02:33.554 --> 00:02:35.757 And I had a friend say, 34 00:02:35.790 --> 00:02:39.326 "you know, this one's great 'cause it's the lightest one." 35 00:02:39.359 --> 00:02:41.261 The chicco that goes... 36 00:02:41.294 --> 00:02:43.865 - Yeah. - That's, yeah, interchangeable. 37 00:02:43.898 --> 00:02:45.566 - Yeah. - But, once we get there, 38 00:02:45.600 --> 00:02:48.435 I saw it was also the cheapest one, 39 00:02:48.468 --> 00:02:52.707 and then that made me so uncomfortable, 40 00:02:52.740 --> 00:02:54.942 'cause then I didn't trust it, and then I, like... 41 00:02:54.976 --> 00:02:58.445 I felt like a shitty mom for going to buy 42 00:02:58.478 --> 00:03:02.482 the cheapest car seat 'cause it was the lightest one, 43 00:03:02.517 --> 00:03:03.994 and it was the one that was recommended to me, 44 00:03:04.018 --> 00:03:06.821 but it wasn't the highest rated one. 45 00:03:06.854 --> 00:03:08.388 Hm. 46 00:03:09.724 --> 00:03:11.859 I, like, totally lost it. 47 00:03:11.893 --> 00:03:13.861 We didn't wind up with that car seat. 48 00:03:13.895 --> 00:03:15.763 - Okay. - Um. 49 00:03:15.797 --> 00:03:17.532 And... and we've never done this before, 50 00:03:17.565 --> 00:03:20.768 so we don't know what... What the right thing to do is. 51 00:03:20.802 --> 00:03:22.469 We don't know what the right way to go is. 52 00:03:22.503 --> 00:03:24.906 But, I mean, I know that my tendency 53 00:03:24.939 --> 00:03:28.943 is to... you know, I get anxious about this stuff, 54 00:03:28.976 --> 00:03:30.578 - and... - Yeah. 55 00:03:30.611 --> 00:03:33.681 And then, I try to mitigate my anxiousness 56 00:03:33.715 --> 00:03:36.851 - with control, and... - And when he gets, 57 00:03:36.884 --> 00:03:38.686 like, high tense and controlling about stuff, 58 00:03:38.720 --> 00:03:41.321 then I start to just take care of him, 59 00:03:41.354 --> 00:03:43.758 and I totally throw myself out the window... 60 00:03:43.791 --> 00:03:45.893 Right, she's trying to take care of me, 61 00:03:45.927 --> 00:03:49.731 and controlling the situation, which... which pisses me off, 62 00:03:49.764 --> 00:03:52.332 because we just keep triggering each other, and... 63 00:03:52.365 --> 00:03:53.977 Like, we've always, you know, kinda sometimes 64 00:03:54.001 --> 00:03:55.803 we just get into a cycle of, like, 65 00:03:55.837 --> 00:03:58.371 - caretaking, controlling... - Caretaking, controlling. 66 00:03:58.405 --> 00:04:00.007 But, I would say it's like 67 00:04:00.041 --> 00:04:03.276 - mm, mm, mm, because of that. - It's on steroids. 68 00:04:03.310 --> 00:04:05.312 So, why don't you just take a deep breath? 69 00:04:05.345 --> 00:04:06.781 Okay. 70 00:04:10.017 --> 00:04:12.520 Now, close your eyes for a second, 71 00:04:12.553 --> 00:04:15.288 both of you, 72 00:04:15.322 --> 00:04:17.925 and I want you to think about is, 73 00:04:17.959 --> 00:04:20.061 what do you need most from each other 74 00:04:20.094 --> 00:04:22.964 to get through the rest of this pregnancy? 75 00:04:22.997 --> 00:04:26.834 And how can you best show up for each other 76 00:04:26.868 --> 00:04:30.303 and make sure that those needs get met? 77 00:04:53.928 --> 00:04:55.428 - Thank you. - You're welcome. 78 00:04:55.462 --> 00:04:57.532 - Bye. - Bye. 79 00:04:57.565 --> 00:04:59.033 Okay. 80 00:05:01.869 --> 00:05:05.338 Oh, don't forget, oxytocin. 81 00:05:05.372 --> 00:05:08.375 At least one orgasm a day, okay? 82 00:05:08.408 --> 00:05:10.645 One orgasm every day. 83 00:05:10.678 --> 00:05:11.879 - Just one. - For both of us? 84 00:05:11.913 --> 00:05:14.381 - More her, you... - It's my oxytocin. 85 00:05:14.414 --> 00:05:16.050 - It's hers. - It's my oxytocin, too. 86 00:05:16.083 --> 00:05:17.585 - One. - Bye. 87 00:05:17.618 --> 00:05:19.419 Bye. 88 00:05:32.066 --> 00:05:34.434 - These kinda go together. - I like this one. 89 00:05:34.467 --> 00:05:35.770 His and her? 90 00:05:35.803 --> 00:05:37.138 These are for us to wear, right? 91 00:05:37.171 --> 00:05:38.806 Yeah. 92 00:05:48.082 --> 00:05:49.750 You don't have to watch us open, 93 00:05:49.784 --> 00:05:52.854 especially if you got us a shitty gift, 94 00:05:52.887 --> 00:05:54.789 but if you want to, 95 00:05:54.822 --> 00:05:57.058 we're gonna be determining which ones of you 96 00:05:57.091 --> 00:05:59.560 are our close friends, and which ones of you 97 00:05:59.594 --> 00:06:01.596 are expendable, so. 98 00:06:01.629 --> 00:06:03.731 - Ohh. - Ohh. 99 00:06:08.736 --> 00:06:10.638 - Oh, my god, it's the chicco! - Oh, man. 100 00:06:10.671 --> 00:06:13.808 - That's cool. - Oh, my god, it's a car seat. 101 00:06:13.841 --> 00:06:16.077 It's a good one, it's light, it's not too heavy, 102 00:06:16.110 --> 00:06:17.912 so you can pop it out, and I'll teach you 103 00:06:17.945 --> 00:06:20.023 a little trick for how to, like, loop your arm under, 104 00:06:20.047 --> 00:06:22.482 - and it makes it easier to... - It's a huge gift. 105 00:06:22.516 --> 00:06:25.086 - Kids do well with it, and... - So, yeah, and the breastfeed, 106 00:06:25.119 --> 00:06:28.556 it, like, really hurts for a long time. 107 00:06:28.589 --> 00:06:31.092 Oh, my gosh, she talked about the latch-on like it was so hard 108 00:06:31.125 --> 00:06:32.593 for new rudi be able to latch on, 109 00:06:32.627 --> 00:06:34.071 and she just, like, "near, near near," 110 00:06:34.095 --> 00:06:36.429 like a little gremlin, just biting and trying to, 111 00:06:36.463 --> 00:06:40.433 like, suck you dry of every little ounce of life 112 00:06:40.467 --> 00:06:42.069 - in your soul. - The only part of it 113 00:06:42.103 --> 00:06:44.005 that is cute is, like, your friend who, like, 114 00:06:44.038 --> 00:06:47.440 posts a beautiful photo of her breastfeeding on social media. 115 00:06:49.143 --> 00:06:51.045 It's like, "uh-huh, okay." 116 00:06:51.078 --> 00:06:52.956 - Nature at its best. - I've got, like, the cracked, 117 00:06:52.980 --> 00:06:54.682 bleeding nipples, and you're just like, 118 00:06:54.715 --> 00:06:56.117 "fuck you." 119 00:06:56.150 --> 00:06:58.185 It's cute, it's cute. 120 00:06:58.219 --> 00:07:00.453 Well, that's the thing, and I feel like women, 121 00:07:00.487 --> 00:07:02.890 and correct me if I'm... If I'm speaking out of turn, 122 00:07:02.924 --> 00:07:06.560 but I feel like women do other women a real disservice 123 00:07:06.594 --> 00:07:08.495 when they talk about their birth experience, 124 00:07:08.529 --> 00:07:10.564 like, "oh, my god, it was so wonderful." 125 00:07:10.598 --> 00:07:13.668 I think that that's a really messed up thing to do 126 00:07:13.701 --> 00:07:15.636 to somebody who's about to go into childbirth, 127 00:07:15.670 --> 00:07:18.606 'cause you should prepared that it's gonna be 128 00:07:18.639 --> 00:07:21.742 the worst thing ever. 129 00:07:21.776 --> 00:07:26.247 It is, sometimes it just tears all the way down. 130 00:07:26.280 --> 00:07:28.082 But, that's just the beginning, 131 00:07:28.115 --> 00:07:30.651 and that's gonna be, like, one to two days tops of... 132 00:07:30.685 --> 00:07:33.888 Of your life, and then it really... begins 133 00:07:33.921 --> 00:07:36.524 - to like... - Do you guys have a method 134 00:07:36.557 --> 00:07:39.160 - that, like, you're in? - Your, um, parenting method. 135 00:07:39.193 --> 00:07:42.697 So, we've been doing, um... Been doing these rie classes. 136 00:07:42.730 --> 00:07:45.099 - Uh-oh. - Which are pretty cool. 137 00:07:45.132 --> 00:07:47.001 - Yeah. - Read the Janet lansbury books, 138 00:07:47.034 --> 00:07:49.170 - which are fantastic. - And babywise. 139 00:07:49.203 --> 00:07:50.738 - Babywise. - To get around 140 00:07:50.771 --> 00:07:52.773 our sleep schedules, so like, we know when 141 00:07:52.807 --> 00:07:54.809 her cry phase will be, and... 142 00:07:54.842 --> 00:07:57.011 I think picking and choosing 143 00:07:57.044 --> 00:07:59.046 different pieces from different books 144 00:07:59.080 --> 00:08:01.649 is totally fine, that's great. 145 00:08:01.682 --> 00:08:02.859 But, you have to decide, like, 146 00:08:02.883 --> 00:08:04.161 "are we gonna have a family bed?" 147 00:08:04.185 --> 00:08:06.153 Like, is she gonna sleep with you guys. 148 00:08:06.187 --> 00:08:07.888 - That's what we did. - We did not do that. 149 00:08:07.922 --> 00:08:10.791 We had her sleeping with us until she was, like, 5? 150 00:08:10.825 --> 00:08:12.693 - Yeah, about 5 years old. - Were you guys just 151 00:08:12.727 --> 00:08:14.104 afraid of, like, crib death, is that why you...? 152 00:08:14.128 --> 00:08:15.672 - Yeah, that was... - Well, that was one of 153 00:08:15.696 --> 00:08:17.565 the big things, of course, it's crib death. 154 00:08:17.598 --> 00:08:19.100 We wanted to keep her close to us. 155 00:08:19.133 --> 00:08:21.602 But, I mean, she is a girl, so I mean, 156 00:08:21.635 --> 00:08:24.138 it's not that high crib deaths for... for girls baby... 157 00:08:24.171 --> 00:08:26.741 You keep saying "crib death" like that's a thing to... 158 00:08:26.774 --> 00:08:28.494 - It's... it's a thing. - Well, yeah, it is. 159 00:08:30.277 --> 00:08:32.613 It's... for a while it's hell, so just be prepared 160 00:08:32.646 --> 00:08:34.257 - that it's gonna be... - You don't get a lot of sleep 161 00:08:34.281 --> 00:08:36.050 - at all. - As soon as they're born, 162 00:08:36.083 --> 00:08:38.061 you will no longer do anything that you enjoy, because... 163 00:08:38.085 --> 00:08:40.154 Your baby dictates who you will become. 164 00:08:40.187 --> 00:08:42.256 You don't get to be yourselves anymore, 165 00:08:42.289 --> 00:08:44.759 'cause you're so tired, and so focused 166 00:08:44.792 --> 00:08:47.695 on making sure that you're not ruining this kid's life, 167 00:08:47.728 --> 00:08:49.339 and you're trying to make sure that you're doing it 168 00:08:49.363 --> 00:08:51.132 in a healthy way, in a productive way, 169 00:08:51.165 --> 00:08:52.666 in a happy way. 170 00:08:52.700 --> 00:08:54.077 You're not gonna repeat your parents' mistakes, 171 00:08:54.101 --> 00:08:55.669 you're not gonna do the wrong things, 172 00:08:55.703 --> 00:08:57.304 - and you do. - Yep. 173 00:08:57.338 --> 00:09:00.141 - You just do. - Watching my parents 174 00:09:00.174 --> 00:09:02.143 deteriorate in front of my eyes as a child, 175 00:09:02.176 --> 00:09:04.945 and not really understand what it was, 176 00:09:04.979 --> 00:09:07.014 I feel like you can see them shrinking from 177 00:09:07.048 --> 00:09:08.816 - who they wanted to be. - You're basically 178 00:09:08.849 --> 00:09:10.360 - getting thrown into war. - You don't have time 179 00:09:10.384 --> 00:09:11.886 for yourself, you just don't, like... 180 00:09:11.919 --> 00:09:13.754 My mother didn't wanna become her mother. 181 00:09:13.788 --> 00:09:15.332 Her mother didn't wanna become her mother. 182 00:09:15.356 --> 00:09:18.759 - My sister didn't wanna become... - And you see it, you know it, 183 00:09:18.793 --> 00:09:20.194 you hate it, 184 00:09:20.227 --> 00:09:22.339 - but you can't stop... - My dad had his money in order, 185 00:09:22.363 --> 00:09:24.065 had, you know, a record collection, 186 00:09:24.098 --> 00:09:25.332 all this cool stuff. 187 00:09:25.366 --> 00:09:27.068 He had a car that he really liked, 188 00:09:27.101 --> 00:09:29.603 he cared about his fucking car, and then at a certain point, 189 00:09:29.637 --> 00:09:31.238 everything was annihilated. 190 00:09:31.272 --> 00:09:33.340 I saw that happen, I saw a man 191 00:09:33.374 --> 00:09:36.377 deteriorate in front of my eyes as a teenager. 192 00:09:36.410 --> 00:09:38.012 I... it was a nightmare. 193 00:09:38.045 --> 00:09:40.014 I can't... I couldn't do it. 194 00:09:41.882 --> 00:09:43.322 But, you guys are gonna kill it, I... 195 00:09:46.954 --> 00:09:48.289 Yeah. 196 00:09:48.322 --> 00:09:51.025 Babe, babe, can you... 197 00:09:51.058 --> 00:09:52.960 Can you please tell me what's...? 198 00:09:52.993 --> 00:09:55.196 Jackie. 199 00:09:55.229 --> 00:09:57.832 Can you... can you just stop for a second? 200 00:09:59.867 --> 00:10:01.669 Babe, 201 00:10:01.702 --> 00:10:04.638 can you look at me and talk to me, please? 202 00:10:08.042 --> 00:10:10.811 Babe. 203 00:10:16.283 --> 00:10:18.185 What the fuck is this? 204 00:10:19.820 --> 00:10:21.222 Hummus. 205 00:10:27.294 --> 00:10:29.930 Did you not see this one? 206 00:10:29.964 --> 00:10:31.799 - I... - I got this one two days ago. 207 00:10:31.832 --> 00:10:33.210 - I didn't... I didn't see that. - It's huge. 208 00:10:33.234 --> 00:10:35.102 Okay, I didn't see that, but I don't think 209 00:10:35.136 --> 00:10:38.072 - it's a big deal, can we not...? - Now, we're just never gonna 210 00:10:38.105 --> 00:10:40.007 get through both of these before they go bad. 211 00:10:40.040 --> 00:10:42.443 - Oh, okay, but... - This one's huge. 212 00:10:42.476 --> 00:10:44.145 I... I didn't see it, I didn't look. 213 00:10:44.178 --> 00:10:46.280 I was also... you gave me the list with the bok choy 214 00:10:46.313 --> 00:10:47.824 - and the tamarind. - Yeah, I gave you a list. 215 00:10:47.848 --> 00:10:49.717 I was just trying to do a nice thing. 216 00:10:49.750 --> 00:10:51.952 I'm just asking you to do an aware thing. 217 00:10:51.986 --> 00:10:54.722 Look, we've... We've already eaten some. 218 00:10:54.755 --> 00:10:56.690 Look, there's already that much out... 219 00:10:56.724 --> 00:10:59.260 You're making that up, you're, like, making that up 220 00:10:59.293 --> 00:11:00.770 - to make your argument stronger. - Okay. 221 00:11:00.794 --> 00:11:03.164 The seal is still on it. 222 00:11:03.197 --> 00:11:05.366 Okay, okay, so the seal's still on it, 223 00:11:05.399 --> 00:11:07.444 - but... but the way they pack... - Why would you lie to me 224 00:11:07.468 --> 00:11:08.869 and be like, "we already ate some"? 225 00:11:08.903 --> 00:11:10.371 I mean, look, it's not that full. 226 00:11:10.404 --> 00:11:11.848 - It's like a potato chip... - You actually think we're gonna 227 00:11:11.872 --> 00:11:14.175 eat all of this before this one... 228 00:11:14.208 --> 00:11:15.943 - Yes! - Goes bad? 229 00:11:15.976 --> 00:11:18.913 - We eat a lot of hummus. - We would never eat this much. 230 00:11:18.946 --> 00:11:20.314 - We've definitely eaten... - When? 231 00:11:20.347 --> 00:11:22.159 - When? When? - Two things of hummus in a week. 232 00:11:22.183 --> 00:11:24.818 Okay, this is not... do you hear yourself talking right now? 233 00:11:24.852 --> 00:11:27.154 Do you hear yourself talking? You're, like, making shit up 234 00:11:27.188 --> 00:11:29.857 - about the stuff we do! - Would you fucking stop? 235 00:11:32.126 --> 00:11:33.961 I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell. 236 00:11:33.994 --> 00:11:35.329 Would you just stop? 237 00:11:35.362 --> 00:11:37.040 Because you're getting really stressed out, 238 00:11:37.064 --> 00:11:39.266 and the ob said you can't get stressed out. 239 00:11:39.300 --> 00:11:42.369 Babe, please don't cry. 240 00:11:42.403 --> 00:11:44.238 I'm... I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 241 00:11:44.271 --> 00:11:46.073 Look, this was all my fault. 242 00:11:46.106 --> 00:11:47.908 I should've absolutely seen 243 00:11:47.942 --> 00:11:49.511 that you bought hummus two days ago. 244 00:11:49.544 --> 00:11:52.022 I was trying to do a nice thing, but you're right, it was stupid. 245 00:11:52.046 --> 00:11:53.781 It wasn't a nice thing. 246 00:11:53.814 --> 00:11:55.382 It was a stupid and oblivious thing, 247 00:11:55.416 --> 00:11:58.819 and, hey, stop, stop, please, please, please? 248 00:11:58.852 --> 00:12:01.021 Babe, 249 00:12:01.055 --> 00:12:03.023 I'm really sorry. 250 00:12:05.560 --> 00:12:07.361 Hey. 251 00:12:13.367 --> 00:12:14.935 Ew. 252 00:12:14.969 --> 00:12:18.372 Why did you just put your hand in it? 253 00:12:18.405 --> 00:12:21.543 If having too much hummus is an issue, 254 00:12:21.576 --> 00:12:25.379 then I'm gonna take care of the issue. 255 00:12:25.412 --> 00:12:27.381 Whether it makes sense to me or not. 256 00:12:27.414 --> 00:12:30.184 It looks... You're not enjoying it. 257 00:12:30.217 --> 00:12:33.954 This is the best hummus I've ever had. 258 00:12:35.422 --> 00:12:37.091 I love this hummus so much. 259 00:12:37.124 --> 00:12:38.560 Oh, my gosh, I mean... 260 00:12:38.593 --> 00:12:40.928 - Ugh, the smell. - This is fun. 261 00:12:40.961 --> 00:12:42.196 The smell, please stop. 262 00:12:42.229 --> 00:12:43.931 Please stop putting it in your mouth, 263 00:12:43.964 --> 00:12:45.408 - stop putting it in your mouth. - And I'm gonna eat that one 264 00:12:45.432 --> 00:12:47.468 - after I'm done with this. - No. 265 00:12:47.502 --> 00:12:48.936 - No. - And we're not gonna 266 00:12:48.969 --> 00:12:50.481 have enough, are we? And we're gonna have to 267 00:12:50.505 --> 00:12:52.349 go shopping for more hummus later on this afternoon. 268 00:12:52.373 --> 00:12:54.542 - Don't you fucking dare. - 'Cause I'm gonna be 269 00:12:54.576 --> 00:12:56.844 a hummus-eating machine. 270 00:12:56.877 --> 00:12:58.379 Don't put it in your mouth, it's so... 271 00:12:58.412 --> 00:13:00.247 Ugh! 272 00:13:01.616 --> 00:13:03.917 Oh, god, sorry, that's so gross. 273 00:13:03.951 --> 00:13:06.253 - I just wanna establish that... - Oh, god. 274 00:13:07.988 --> 00:13:11.526 In this case, your concern 275 00:13:11.559 --> 00:13:14.962 about our... our hummus overage, 276 00:13:14.995 --> 00:13:17.131 um, might've just been rectified, 277 00:13:17.164 --> 00:13:18.999 'cause look, look, that one's half gone. 278 00:13:19.033 --> 00:13:21.001 - It's half gone. - And here's a vow 279 00:13:21.035 --> 00:13:23.871 that I make to you: 280 00:13:23.904 --> 00:13:28.008 I will never, ever, ever 281 00:13:28.042 --> 00:13:29.943 buy too much hummus again. 282 00:13:29.977 --> 00:13:31.912 - Never. - Never. 283 00:13:31.945 --> 00:13:34.616 I really appreciate that. 284 00:13:39.053 --> 00:13:41.455 There are gonna be times when I probably want more hummus. 285 00:13:41.488 --> 00:13:44.124 If you ask me to buy you hummus, I'll go out and buy you hummus 286 00:13:44.158 --> 00:13:46.293 that minute. 287 00:13:47.928 --> 00:13:49.564 Hm? 288 00:13:56.270 --> 00:13:57.871 - Oh, god. - Mm. 289 00:13:57.905 --> 00:13:59.239 - It's smelling. - Mm. 290 00:13:59.273 --> 00:14:00.974 - It's smelling. - Mm. 291 00:14:01.008 --> 00:14:02.644 - Mm. - Mm. 292 00:14:04.978 --> 00:14:07.214 What are you doing? 293 00:14:07.247 --> 00:14:09.850 Maya said, "once a day." 294 00:14:11.452 --> 00:14:13.053 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 295 00:14:13.087 --> 00:14:14.288 - What? - Do you still have 296 00:14:14.321 --> 00:14:16.056 hummus in your mouth? 297 00:14:16.090 --> 00:14:17.901 - No, I swallowed the hummus. - I think there's probably 298 00:14:17.925 --> 00:14:20.160 - still some there. - No, I think I... 299 00:14:20.194 --> 00:14:21.962 - Yeah, but... - I think I swallowed it. 300 00:14:21.995 --> 00:14:24.566 I can smell it still, so. 301 00:14:24.599 --> 00:14:26.300 What if you...? No, it's so... 302 00:14:26.333 --> 00:14:28.603 I'm super turned on, but if you, like, 303 00:14:28.636 --> 00:14:31.506 maybe just brush your teeth, or...? 304 00:14:31.539 --> 00:14:33.140 - 'Cause of bacteria. - Okay. 305 00:14:33.173 --> 00:14:35.075 I could go for it, but it... It's the bacteria 306 00:14:35.109 --> 00:14:37.044 - and the baby. - Okay, yeah. 307 00:14:37.077 --> 00:14:38.613 I'll go brush my teeth. 308 00:14:38.646 --> 00:14:41.516 And then, I'm gonna be... 309 00:14:41.549 --> 00:14:44.084 I'll meet you upstairs. 310 00:14:44.118 --> 00:14:45.653 Thank you. 311 00:14:57.331 --> 00:15:00.334 You're right, it was the whole day. 312 00:15:00.367 --> 00:15:02.202 It was the whole day. 313 00:15:02.236 --> 00:15:04.606 - I know. - Our friends... 314 00:15:04.639 --> 00:15:07.174 - Suck. - I know, our friends suck. 315 00:15:07.207 --> 00:15:09.644 They were so discouraging. 316 00:15:12.246 --> 00:15:14.214 It's still a little... I still smell it. 317 00:15:14.248 --> 00:15:17.017 - You're such a dick. - I'm a super smeller. 318 00:15:18.485 --> 00:15:20.454 Who brings up crib death 319 00:15:20.487 --> 00:15:22.222 at our baby shower? 320 00:15:22.256 --> 00:15:24.191 Mhm, I know. 321 00:15:24.224 --> 00:15:27.194 - Who does that? - I know. 322 00:15:27.227 --> 00:15:30.030 They said my vagina 323 00:15:30.063 --> 00:15:33.467 is gonna rip down. 324 00:15:33.500 --> 00:15:35.603 To your asshole. 325 00:15:35.637 --> 00:15:37.304 I don't mean to laugh, because I know 326 00:15:37.337 --> 00:15:39.215 - that would really suck. - Apparently it happens 327 00:15:39.239 --> 00:15:41.108 - all the time. - I am just laughing 328 00:15:41.141 --> 00:15:44.111 at the severe insensitivity of our asshole friends 329 00:15:44.144 --> 00:15:45.989 that they would bring it up at our fucking baby shower. 330 00:15:46.013 --> 00:15:49.283 I truly don't think they want us to be parents. 331 00:15:49.316 --> 00:15:52.119 What, you think they want us to have an abortion? 332 00:15:52.152 --> 00:15:54.221 Third-term abortion. 333 00:15:54.254 --> 00:15:55.623 I do. 334 00:15:55.657 --> 00:15:57.066 - Oh, that's so dark. - I do, I think they were trying 335 00:15:57.090 --> 00:15:58.368 - to convince us... - That's so dark 336 00:15:58.392 --> 00:16:00.294 to go into the ob, be like, 337 00:16:00.327 --> 00:16:03.197 "um, here's the thing: We know we were 338 00:16:03.230 --> 00:16:05.767 - really excited... - "We were, we were excited." 339 00:16:05.800 --> 00:16:08.001 About having this kid, but..." 340 00:16:08.035 --> 00:16:10.270 "But, we had a... We had a baby shower." 341 00:16:10.304 --> 00:16:12.740 "And our friends really fucked us up, 342 00:16:12.774 --> 00:16:15.710 and now we're wondering if you could 343 00:16:15.743 --> 00:16:18.513 take her out, and just, like, 344 00:16:18.546 --> 00:16:20.123 - "get rid of her." - You need to kiss her 345 00:16:20.147 --> 00:16:22.684 after this joke, this joke is too bad. 346 00:16:22.717 --> 00:16:25.052 - Baby, it's really dark and... - Baby. 347 00:16:25.085 --> 00:16:28.422 Dark, bad jokes for a dark, bad baby shower. 348 00:16:30.424 --> 00:16:32.059 But, they were so serious 349 00:16:32.092 --> 00:16:36.029 about... turning out like their parents. 350 00:16:36.063 --> 00:16:38.098 I know, but you know what? 351 00:16:38.131 --> 00:16:39.534 And it's true. 352 00:16:39.567 --> 00:16:41.803 - But, you know what? - They have. 353 00:16:41.836 --> 00:16:45.339 But, in fairness, b's always been a living nightmare, and... 354 00:16:45.372 --> 00:16:47.407 But now, she's exactly like her mom. 355 00:16:47.441 --> 00:16:50.477 Hey, babe, it's okay. 356 00:16:50.512 --> 00:16:53.080 - You know why? - Why? 357 00:16:53.113 --> 00:16:55.783 'Cause we're cooler than they are. 358 00:16:58.118 --> 00:17:00.755 Come on, take your pants off, come to bed. 359 00:17:02.590 --> 00:17:05.425 Fuck. 360 00:17:05.459 --> 00:17:07.227 Honey, 361 00:17:07.261 --> 00:17:09.764 I have to tell you something before I take my pants off. 362 00:17:09.797 --> 00:17:12.099 No, take your pants off, then you can tell me something. 363 00:17:12.132 --> 00:17:14.301 - That's so bad. - No, can you just 364 00:17:14.334 --> 00:17:16.571 take your pants off first, and then you can 365 00:17:16.604 --> 00:17:18.405 tell me something if you have to? 366 00:17:20.675 --> 00:17:23.443 Take your pants off. 367 00:17:23.477 --> 00:17:26.413 I got a text from my dad at the baby shower. 368 00:17:30.250 --> 00:17:32.419 I'm so sorry. 369 00:17:32.452 --> 00:17:34.321 Ugh. 370 00:17:34.354 --> 00:17:35.823 - No. - He said he was gonna 371 00:17:35.857 --> 00:17:37.457 be evicted. 372 00:17:37.491 --> 00:17:40.127 No. 373 00:17:40.160 --> 00:17:41.596 Um, I know. 374 00:17:43.698 --> 00:17:46.534 - I know, honey, I know... - How much did you send him? 375 00:17:49.202 --> 00:17:50.772 2,000. 376 00:17:52.507 --> 00:17:54.842 I'm... I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 377 00:17:59.479 --> 00:18:00.882 Woo. 378 00:18:00.915 --> 00:18:04.384 Babe, your dad is always about to be evicted, 379 00:18:04.418 --> 00:18:06.688 because your dad is a fucking drug addict 380 00:18:06.721 --> 00:18:08.856 who spends all his money on oxys. 381 00:18:08.890 --> 00:18:10.525 You swore. 382 00:18:10.558 --> 00:18:12.326 - You swore to god... - I know, I did. 383 00:18:12.359 --> 00:18:14.461 The last four times, not just, like, 384 00:18:14.494 --> 00:18:15.830 the last time it happened. 385 00:18:15.863 --> 00:18:18.600 The last four times it happened you swore to me 386 00:18:18.633 --> 00:18:19.877 - that you'd never do it again. - I did. 387 00:18:19.901 --> 00:18:21.603 - You swore to your sponsor. - I did. 388 00:18:21.636 --> 00:18:23.638 You swore to our therapist. 389 00:18:23.671 --> 00:18:25.205 - I did. - We sat down 390 00:18:25.238 --> 00:18:26.874 and we had this discussion, and you said, 391 00:18:26.908 --> 00:18:28.643 - "I'm never gonna do it again." - I know. 392 00:18:28.676 --> 00:18:31.546 That's the fucking kid's money that you just gave him. 393 00:18:31.579 --> 00:18:33.548 You are so, so right, 394 00:18:33.581 --> 00:18:36.383 and I know you're so, so right. 395 00:18:36.416 --> 00:18:38.352 Can you... can you not turn this into, like, 396 00:18:38.385 --> 00:18:41.388 "you're so right," self-flagellation stuff? 397 00:18:41.421 --> 00:18:44.759 Can you just let me be really pissed for a second? 398 00:18:44.792 --> 00:18:47.294 Yes. 399 00:18:47.327 --> 00:18:49.931 Thank you. 400 00:18:49.964 --> 00:18:53.233 Okay, that's all I needed. 401 00:18:55.268 --> 00:18:57.337 - Oh, man. - It's not fair. 402 00:18:57.371 --> 00:19:00.240 - That's a bummer. - It's such a bummer. 403 00:19:00.273 --> 00:19:02.744 It was just habit, but I know I... 404 00:19:02.777 --> 00:19:05.345 I can't, I gotta change. 405 00:19:05.379 --> 00:19:08.716 Well, we both have... Look, I just... 406 00:19:08.750 --> 00:19:11.485 I just... my first reaction when I was upset 407 00:19:11.519 --> 00:19:13.487 - was to, like, do that. - It's very scary. 408 00:19:13.521 --> 00:19:15.455 And... and I don't... 409 00:19:15.489 --> 00:19:18.926 I mean, how many fucking hundreds of hours 410 00:19:18.960 --> 00:19:20.561 in therapy have I spent 411 00:19:20.595 --> 00:19:22.396 trying to work through my rage issues. 412 00:19:22.429 --> 00:19:24.599 - There's still... - A hole. 413 00:19:24.632 --> 00:19:26.834 The hole in the sheetrock 414 00:19:26.868 --> 00:19:29.904 from... from, like, a month and a half ago, 415 00:19:29.937 --> 00:19:31.506 and that's insane. 416 00:19:31.539 --> 00:19:34.207 It's like, 417 00:19:34.241 --> 00:19:37.477 if we don't pull our shit together, 418 00:19:37.512 --> 00:19:39.714 - she's gonna... - We're gonna fuck up our kid. 419 00:19:41.916 --> 00:19:43.483 Mm. 420 00:19:43.518 --> 00:19:45.653 Like, we signed up for each other's madness. 421 00:19:45.687 --> 00:19:48.656 - I know. - She didn't sign up for it. 422 00:19:48.690 --> 00:19:51.391 I know, it makes me really sad actually. 423 00:19:51.425 --> 00:19:54.862 The therapy has made us aware. 424 00:19:54.896 --> 00:19:57.364 - Mhm. - But, clearly... 425 00:19:57.397 --> 00:19:59.466 Hasn't actually changed 426 00:19:59.499 --> 00:20:02.335 our behavior enough. 427 00:20:02.369 --> 00:20:05.640 It's like we need to, like, shake ourselves, 428 00:20:05.673 --> 00:20:08.710 'cause we gotta pull it together before we're parents. 429 00:20:08.743 --> 00:20:11.846 And I'm scared, too, because we've got 430 00:20:11.879 --> 00:20:14.782 - a month. - What if we shake it up? 431 00:20:14.816 --> 00:20:16.617 What if we challenge each other? 432 00:20:16.651 --> 00:20:18.553 What if we challenge each other to, like, 433 00:20:18.586 --> 00:20:20.655 activities and tasks? Like, we have a month... 434 00:20:20.688 --> 00:20:22.857 - I like this. - Before this baby is coming. 435 00:20:22.890 --> 00:20:24.458 - That is time. - We got... 436 00:20:24.491 --> 00:20:25.769 - We got four weeks... - It's a short amount. 437 00:20:25.793 --> 00:20:29.429 To become fully realized humans. 438 00:20:33.333 --> 00:20:36.537 To be parents. 439 00:20:36.571 --> 00:20:38.740 - Okay, so we got four weeks. - Let's do something. 440 00:20:38.773 --> 00:20:40.416 - Let's do it, let's do it. - Let's do it, let's change. 441 00:20:40.440 --> 00:20:41.809 Let's do it. 442 00:20:41.843 --> 00:20:43.745 - What are we gonna do? - More... let's, like... 443 00:20:43.778 --> 00:20:45.345 Let's jump out of an airplane. 444 00:20:45.378 --> 00:20:47.582 - Dine and dash. - Dine and dash, I'm in. 445 00:20:47.615 --> 00:20:49.358 - I'm in, let's do it. - I mean, just to get ourselves, 446 00:20:49.382 --> 00:20:51.284 - like, uncomfortable... - Okay. 447 00:20:51.318 --> 00:20:53.721 And, like... And see what we're made of. 448 00:20:53.755 --> 00:20:55.623 We could, uh... 449 00:20:55.656 --> 00:20:58.860 We could buy a classic car and drive it up the coast. 450 00:20:58.893 --> 00:21:00.762 Like, we go to Antarctica. 451 00:21:00.795 --> 00:21:03.598 Great, we dive under an icecap, 452 00:21:03.631 --> 00:21:06.333 and swim around, and we come up, and woo! 453 00:21:06.366 --> 00:21:08.703 - Yeah, yeah! - Yeah, yeah! 454 00:21:08.736 --> 00:21:10.738 We could jump off a cliff into the ocean. 455 00:21:10.772 --> 00:21:13.841 - Um, we could swim with sharks. - We could graffiti something. 456 00:21:13.875 --> 00:21:15.510 Uh, we could get tattoos. 457 00:21:15.543 --> 00:21:17.779 - Let's, um... - Go to a punk-rock show. 458 00:21:17.812 --> 00:21:20.380 - Mosh pit. - We buy a falcon. 459 00:21:20.413 --> 00:21:22.683 - I would love a falcon. - Oh, yeah. 460 00:21:22.717 --> 00:21:24.852 - Sitting on the porch. - Um. 461 00:21:24.886 --> 00:21:27.320 We could... Let's get chased by the cops. 462 00:21:27.354 --> 00:21:28.890 We could do anything honestly. 463 00:21:28.923 --> 00:21:30.625 We could... but we could both take 464 00:21:30.658 --> 00:21:32.778 - pole dancing classes. - I could fuck you in the ass. 465 00:21:34.061 --> 00:21:35.863 That's funny. 466 00:21:38.733 --> 00:21:40.701 - Yeah, no. - Okay, what else could we do? 467 00:21:40.735 --> 00:21:42.402 - No, but, honey. - What? 468 00:21:42.435 --> 00:21:44.481 - Actually that one... - Oh, we're not playing a game, 469 00:21:44.505 --> 00:21:46.373 - you're serious now. - All the other ones 470 00:21:46.406 --> 00:21:48.085 it's super fun to think of, but we actually 471 00:21:48.109 --> 00:21:50.578 can't travel right now, 'cause of the baby, 472 00:21:50.611 --> 00:21:52.880 and we can't put her in dangerous situations. 473 00:21:52.914 --> 00:21:55.448 Like... like, it's fun to think about jumping out of a plane, 474 00:21:55.482 --> 00:21:56.827 but I'm never gonna do that with a baby, 475 00:21:56.851 --> 00:21:59.654 but... but what about 476 00:21:59.687 --> 00:22:02.089 pegging? 477 00:22:02.123 --> 00:22:04.692 - Because that's... - I... I... I... 478 00:22:04.725 --> 00:22:06.127 - intimate. - I just got... 479 00:22:06.160 --> 00:22:08.495 It is intimate, I don't see how it really 480 00:22:08.529 --> 00:22:10.631 prepares us to become better parents 481 00:22:10.665 --> 00:22:12.042 - in a month. - No, but it... it makes us 482 00:22:12.066 --> 00:22:13.534 - deal with stuff. - Ugh. 483 00:22:13.568 --> 00:22:16.537 It's an act... it's so actionable. 484 00:22:16.571 --> 00:22:18.639 Yeah, no, it's definitely actionable. 485 00:22:18.673 --> 00:22:20.449 I read this article and it's like it's supposed 486 00:22:20.473 --> 00:22:22.510 - to be so empowering. - Mhm. 487 00:22:22.543 --> 00:22:25.546 And it... and honestly, it really deals with our issues 488 00:22:25.580 --> 00:22:26.957 in a way where... 'Cause I'm always being 489 00:22:26.981 --> 00:22:28.783 a caretaker, and I'm always, like... 490 00:22:28.816 --> 00:22:31.484 Like, when we have sex, I receive you and I hold you, 491 00:22:31.519 --> 00:22:32.820 and I'm always going 492 00:22:32.854 --> 00:22:34.555 - with your rhythm. - I wait until you come 493 00:22:34.589 --> 00:22:36.066 - until I come every single time. - Which is... which is awesome. 494 00:22:36.090 --> 00:22:37.792 No, you are a very generous lover, 495 00:22:37.825 --> 00:22:39.703 you're very good, but it is like a waiting for you... 496 00:22:39.727 --> 00:22:41.762 It is... there is, like, um... 497 00:22:41.796 --> 00:22:43.831 You're in control, 498 00:22:43.865 --> 00:22:46.167 and what if you weren't in control? 499 00:22:46.200 --> 00:22:49.136 Hm? 500 00:22:49.170 --> 00:22:52.607 I mean, it would be so... Remember what Maya said? 501 00:22:52.640 --> 00:22:55.475 Yeah, when... when we were humming the song back then, 502 00:22:55.509 --> 00:22:58.478 I didn't think it was leading to fucking me in the ass. 503 00:23:00.648 --> 00:23:02.516 - Honey. - Uh-huh? 504 00:23:05.485 --> 00:23:08.556 I feel like I need this. 505 00:23:30.511 --> 00:23:32.013 - Hello. - Hi. 506 00:23:32.046 --> 00:23:34.649 Hi. 507 00:23:34.682 --> 00:23:38.019 So, this is our sweet spot. 508 00:23:38.052 --> 00:23:40.955 First time, it's so exciting. 509 00:23:40.988 --> 00:23:43.224 I remember my first time like it was, 510 00:23:43.257 --> 00:23:44.892 uh, 10 years ago. 511 00:23:46.594 --> 00:23:48.863 Uh, I guess it kinda depends on who this is for. 512 00:23:48.896 --> 00:23:52.033 I mean, obviously it's for both of you, right? 513 00:23:52.066 --> 00:23:55.468 Yeah, more for her in this case than for me, 514 00:23:55.503 --> 00:23:58.239 - but yeah. - I think for you... 515 00:23:58.272 --> 00:23:59.807 - Mhm. - You might like something 516 00:23:59.840 --> 00:24:01.742 - with vibration because... - Nah. 517 00:24:01.776 --> 00:24:05.046 You'll also have a bit of clitoral stimulation during. 518 00:24:05.079 --> 00:24:07.615 - Ooh. - So, that could be really nice. 519 00:24:07.648 --> 00:24:10.483 I think... I think we don't need to do vibration. 520 00:24:10.518 --> 00:24:12.553 Let's just... Let's skip the vibration. 521 00:24:12.586 --> 00:24:14.622 Let's skip any bells and whistles, 522 00:24:14.655 --> 00:24:16.691 and really what we're looking for 523 00:24:16.724 --> 00:24:19.260 is just kinda the vw bug 524 00:24:19.293 --> 00:24:21.729 of strap-ons. 525 00:24:21.762 --> 00:24:23.831 We do have a beginner strap-on actually. 526 00:24:23.864 --> 00:24:26.043 Oh, that is, that says, "beginner strap-on" right there, 527 00:24:26.067 --> 00:24:28.569 - "for him." - It's 4-and-a-half inches. 528 00:24:28.602 --> 00:24:30.871 - Okay. - So, I think plus belly... 529 00:24:30.905 --> 00:24:33.240 I was gonna say, if... Do we need, like... 530 00:24:33.274 --> 00:24:35.152 I think you're gonna want more length, personally. 531 00:24:35.176 --> 00:24:37.220 Personally, I would say you're gonna want more length 532 00:24:37.244 --> 00:24:39.246 given belly and. 533 00:24:39.280 --> 00:24:42.950 Okay, I would suggest going modular. 534 00:24:42.984 --> 00:24:44.885 We've got a couple harness options. 535 00:24:44.919 --> 00:24:46.954 This is our most popular, this is my favorite. 536 00:24:46.988 --> 00:24:48.899 - I have this one actually. - Oh, you have this one? 537 00:24:48.923 --> 00:24:50.591 Yeah, this one's really, really great. 538 00:24:50.624 --> 00:24:53.794 Super well priced, really easy to use. 539 00:24:53.828 --> 00:24:55.563 Um, not super intimidating. 540 00:24:55.596 --> 00:24:58.833 Can you just tell me, what... What are these? 541 00:24:58.866 --> 00:25:02.136 This is, um, if you want a dick on your dick. 542 00:25:02.169 --> 00:25:03.771 Uh, oh, that's just if... 543 00:25:03.804 --> 00:25:05.272 - Length. - You have a small dick 544 00:25:05.306 --> 00:25:06.984 - and you want a bigger dick? - You don't necessarily 545 00:25:07.008 --> 00:25:08.976 have to have a small dick, it's for any size dick, 546 00:25:09.010 --> 00:25:11.312 but if you want more length. 547 00:25:11.345 --> 00:25:13.848 So, I... I would go here. 548 00:25:13.881 --> 00:25:15.549 It's a really good color. 549 00:25:15.583 --> 00:25:17.752 - If it's your favorite. - Yeah, I would go here. 550 00:25:17.785 --> 00:25:19.887 - And then... - Can I just ask, 551 00:25:19.920 --> 00:25:22.990 um, is something that you use with your current partner? 552 00:25:23.024 --> 00:25:25.826 It is something I have used with past partners, yes. 553 00:25:25.860 --> 00:25:28.562 Um, and without getting too personal... 554 00:25:28.596 --> 00:25:30.140 I guess as a general question, 'cause I think 555 00:25:30.164 --> 00:25:32.566 what he's getting at is, a lot of straight couples 556 00:25:32.600 --> 00:25:34.668 - use this, right? - Definitely. 557 00:25:34.702 --> 00:25:36.246 - That's what I was asking. - Definitely, plenty of 558 00:25:36.270 --> 00:25:40.307 - straight couples use these. - But, is your partner a...? 559 00:25:43.244 --> 00:25:45.279 So, I would say 560 00:25:45.312 --> 00:25:47.882 this would be a great place to go 561 00:25:47.915 --> 00:25:49.817 if you wanna go for something modular, 562 00:25:49.850 --> 00:25:53.254 where you can purchase a harness and also a dildo. 563 00:25:53.287 --> 00:25:55.089 And are these the only two options for dildos? 564 00:25:55.122 --> 00:25:57.358 No, we have a plethora of options. 565 00:25:57.391 --> 00:25:59.360 Uh, would you like to see them? 566 00:25:59.393 --> 00:26:01.729 - Okay, there we go. - Good. 567 00:26:01.762 --> 00:26:03.998 - And that'll be all? - And some of this. 568 00:26:04.031 --> 00:26:06.700 - Plus lube, okay. - I got this one. 569 00:26:06.734 --> 00:26:08.235 - Thanks, babe. - Yeah. 570 00:26:37.798 --> 00:26:39.700 All right, come here, I love you. 571 00:26:39.733 --> 00:26:41.268 I just want you to know 572 00:26:41.302 --> 00:26:44.038 your mama's dick is bigger than mine is, 573 00:26:44.071 --> 00:26:46.073 and, um, I'm okay with that, 574 00:26:46.107 --> 00:26:49.743 because I am a modern, evolved man 575 00:26:49.777 --> 00:26:51.979 - in a modern, evolved world. - Mhm. 576 00:26:52.012 --> 00:26:55.316 And, um, that doesn't make me feel insecure at all. 577 00:26:55.349 --> 00:26:57.718 - Okay, okay. - Mhm. 578 00:26:57.751 --> 00:26:59.420 Okay, okay. 579 00:26:59.453 --> 00:27:02.256 - I like this angle. - Thanks. 580 00:27:02.289 --> 00:27:05.025 I'm gonna need your butt a little higher. 581 00:27:05.059 --> 00:27:06.760 - Okay. - Like, put a little arch 582 00:27:06.794 --> 00:27:08.996 in your back, a little cat cow. 583 00:27:09.029 --> 00:27:10.664 - Uh-huh. - Okay. 584 00:27:10.698 --> 00:27:13.167 Just... I know what you're feeling. 585 00:27:13.200 --> 00:27:15.069 - Uh-huh, uh-huh. - I've been there. 586 00:27:15.102 --> 00:27:18.272 Just put the weight on the elbows. 587 00:27:18.305 --> 00:27:20.141 - Okay. - And let yourself 588 00:27:20.174 --> 00:27:22.710 rock forward. 589 00:27:22.743 --> 00:27:24.445 It's better, right? 590 00:27:24.478 --> 00:27:26.881 You're gonna feel 591 00:27:26.914 --> 00:27:28.415 - a little something... - Okay! 592 00:27:28.449 --> 00:27:32.219 Um, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. 593 00:27:32.253 --> 00:27:34.221 - I didn't even put it in. - I know. 594 00:27:34.255 --> 00:27:36.790 If I say, "stop," you stop immediately. 595 00:27:36.824 --> 00:27:38.425 - Immediately. - Safe word: 596 00:27:38.459 --> 00:27:40.861 "Immediately." 597 00:27:40.895 --> 00:27:43.130 "Immediately" is our safe word? 598 00:27:43.164 --> 00:27:46.133 No, "stop" is our safe word, I'm just... I was just trying 599 00:27:46.167 --> 00:27:48.702 to reiterate that if I say, "stop," 600 00:27:48.736 --> 00:27:50.704 that you immediately stop. 601 00:27:50.738 --> 00:27:53.140 Yes, and maybe, 602 00:27:53.174 --> 00:27:55.843 just throwing out there, we pause, 603 00:27:55.876 --> 00:27:58.078 as opposed to, like, pull everything apart. 604 00:27:58.112 --> 00:28:00.714 Okay, except if I tell you to pull it out, you pull it out. 605 00:28:00.748 --> 00:28:01.916 - Yes. - Okay. 606 00:28:01.949 --> 00:28:03.951 - Yeah. - Okay, I just, you know, 607 00:28:03.984 --> 00:28:06.220 - I would do the same for you. - You would? 608 00:28:06.253 --> 00:28:09.190 - Yeah. - All right. 609 00:28:09.223 --> 00:28:12.893 - Just breathe. - Okay, huh! 610 00:28:12.927 --> 00:28:15.863 - Huh! - It's a familiar. 611 00:28:15.896 --> 00:28:18.432 - It's me. - Ah, ah, ah, ah! 612 00:28:18.465 --> 00:28:20.467 Breathe. 613 00:28:20.501 --> 00:28:22.970 It's okay, are you okay? 614 00:28:23.003 --> 00:28:24.338 - Mhm. - Okay, I want you to... 615 00:28:24.371 --> 00:28:26.974 I want you to enjoy it, and if you don't, it's... 616 00:28:27.007 --> 00:28:29.977 We're just gonna pause. 617 00:28:30.010 --> 00:28:31.988 Just let me breathe, just stop right there and let me breathe. 618 00:28:32.012 --> 00:28:33.480 Uh-huh. 619 00:28:36.116 --> 00:28:37.785 You're doing so good. 620 00:28:37.818 --> 00:28:40.154 - You're doing so good, baby. - Okay. 621 00:28:40.187 --> 00:28:43.290 I'm just gonna... Your back is all sweaty. 622 00:28:43.324 --> 00:28:45.859 - Okay, um... - Like it, do you like it? 623 00:28:45.893 --> 00:28:48.062 - Yeah, I'm just... - You do? 624 00:28:48.095 --> 00:28:51.165 - I'm gonna move for a second. - Yeah. 625 00:28:51.198 --> 00:28:53.500 - Okay. - Yeah, lean in. 626 00:28:56.971 --> 00:29:00.007 - Okay. - Uh-huh. 627 00:29:00.040 --> 00:29:03.110 That's what it looks like. 628 00:29:03.143 --> 00:29:05.346 - Okay. - Yeah. 629 00:29:07.982 --> 00:29:10.484 - Get it. - Okay. 630 00:29:10.518 --> 00:29:12.453 - Oh, sweetie! - Ah, ah! 631 00:29:12.486 --> 00:29:14.288 - Oh, sweetie. - Ah, ah! 632 00:29:14.321 --> 00:29:16.558 - Uh-huh, uh-huh. - Ah, ah! 633 00:29:16.591 --> 00:29:19.393 - Ah, ah! - Oh, sweetie, sweetie! 634 00:29:19.426 --> 00:29:22.196 - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah! - Ah, ah! 635 00:29:22.229 --> 00:29:23.797 Yeah! 636 00:29:23.831 --> 00:29:25.899 Yeah. 637 00:29:37.478 --> 00:29:40.981 I'm... I'm the woman. 638 00:29:41.015 --> 00:29:43.417 I'm the woman. 639 00:29:56.297 --> 00:29:57.865 Honey? 640 00:29:57.898 --> 00:29:59.833 Are you okay? 641 00:29:59.867 --> 00:30:01.468 Yes, and I'm sorry. 642 00:30:03.538 --> 00:30:05.939 Where'd you fucking go? 643 00:30:10.210 --> 00:30:11.513 Fuck! 644 00:30:52.319 --> 00:30:54.054 You're awake? 645 00:30:54.088 --> 00:30:55.923 Mhm. 646 00:30:55.956 --> 00:30:58.359 - Good mornin'. - Good morning, baby. 647 00:31:01.596 --> 00:31:04.198 I feel great! 648 00:31:04.231 --> 00:31:06.300 - Great. - Honey, 649 00:31:06.333 --> 00:31:09.571 I just slept through the whole night. 650 00:31:09.604 --> 00:31:12.172 I know, you didn't get up and pee, or anything. 651 00:31:12.206 --> 00:31:14.308 I can't believe it. 652 00:31:14.341 --> 00:31:16.043 Uh, you deserve it. 653 00:31:16.076 --> 00:31:18.445 It's like a miracle. 654 00:31:18.479 --> 00:31:21.448 I haven't slept a whole night 655 00:31:21.482 --> 00:31:23.585 the entire third trimester. 656 00:31:23.618 --> 00:31:26.353 I know. 657 00:31:26.387 --> 00:31:28.422 Ahh. 658 00:31:28.455 --> 00:31:30.391 I'm glad. 659 00:31:30.424 --> 00:31:32.694 I wore myself out yesterday. 660 00:31:32.727 --> 00:31:34.562 - Yeah, you sure did. - Yep. 661 00:31:34.596 --> 00:31:36.363 Yeah. 662 00:31:36.397 --> 00:31:39.266 Oh, how do you feel? 663 00:31:39.299 --> 00:31:42.035 Mm, I'm okay. 664 00:31:42.069 --> 00:31:44.539 I feel a little funny, I didn't sleep much, 665 00:31:44.572 --> 00:31:46.974 - but I'm all right. - No? 666 00:31:47.007 --> 00:31:49.644 Uh-uh, it was a bit of a fraught night. 667 00:31:51.478 --> 00:31:53.280 Oh, my god, I'm so sorry. 668 00:31:53.313 --> 00:31:57.017 - It's okay. - I felt so profoundly... 669 00:31:59.621 --> 00:32:01.221 completed. 670 00:32:01.255 --> 00:32:03.558 I really appreciate it, I'm sorry you had 671 00:32:03.591 --> 00:32:06.059 such a bad night. 672 00:32:06.093 --> 00:32:08.128 - Mm. - I mean, don't you feel 673 00:32:08.162 --> 00:32:10.130 like we... 674 00:32:10.164 --> 00:32:11.599 We broke the mold? 675 00:32:11.633 --> 00:32:15.102 I feel like I... I broke the... 676 00:32:15.135 --> 00:32:16.638 The mold in some way. 677 00:32:16.671 --> 00:32:19.273 I, like, feel funky and weird. 678 00:32:19.306 --> 00:32:21.208 - Hm. - Like, 679 00:32:21.241 --> 00:32:23.545 we can do anything. 680 00:32:23.578 --> 00:32:26.046 There's no rules, we can do anything. 681 00:32:26.079 --> 00:32:27.615 Hm. 682 00:32:30.284 --> 00:32:32.152 No. 683 00:32:32.186 --> 00:32:35.088 I think... 684 00:32:35.122 --> 00:32:38.593 I mean, 685 00:32:38.626 --> 00:32:40.994 okay, if I'm being totally honest. 686 00:32:41.028 --> 00:32:43.464 Mhm, which I want you to be. 687 00:32:43.497 --> 00:32:46.133 Okay. 688 00:32:46.166 --> 00:32:47.501 Um. 689 00:32:53.307 --> 00:32:55.743 Do you know how many times my dad used the word "faggot" 690 00:32:55.777 --> 00:32:58.479 when I was a kid? 691 00:32:58.513 --> 00:33:00.615 That's so bad. 692 00:33:00.648 --> 00:33:03.350 Like, "faggot this, and faggot that." 693 00:33:03.383 --> 00:33:05.419 And that didn't even 694 00:33:05.452 --> 00:33:09.256 really mean "gay." 695 00:33:09.289 --> 00:33:11.492 It just meant 696 00:33:11.526 --> 00:33:14.094 "weak." 697 00:33:14.127 --> 00:33:16.598 And so, here I am, 698 00:33:16.631 --> 00:33:18.432 an adult man, 699 00:33:18.465 --> 00:33:21.636 who's in a loving relationship... 700 00:33:21.669 --> 00:33:23.303 - Mhm. - With a strong 701 00:33:23.337 --> 00:33:25.339 and beautiful woman, who has, 702 00:33:25.372 --> 00:33:27.307 at least biologically speaking, 703 00:33:27.341 --> 00:33:29.611 - proved my manliness. - Totally. 704 00:33:29.644 --> 00:33:32.446 And all of a sudden we're doing this thing 705 00:33:32.479 --> 00:33:35.449 where we're... we're conducting this experiment. 706 00:33:35.482 --> 00:33:37.317 - Yeah? - And then, the second 707 00:33:37.351 --> 00:33:40.320 it felt good, my head came back in, 708 00:33:40.354 --> 00:33:43.223 and it was like, "what, 'cause you're a faggot?" 709 00:33:45.158 --> 00:33:47.261 - Okay. - And... and... and that's terrible, 710 00:33:47.294 --> 00:33:50.397 and I'm sorry I keep using that word. 711 00:33:50.430 --> 00:33:53.066 It's just, it's obviously not me talking. 712 00:33:53.100 --> 00:33:55.703 - Yeah. - It's... it's all the baggage 713 00:33:55.737 --> 00:33:58.506 from my hometown, and from growing up 714 00:33:58.540 --> 00:34:00.675 - with an Alpha father... - Yeah. 715 00:34:00.708 --> 00:34:02.309 And... and so, when I was downstairs, 716 00:34:02.342 --> 00:34:04.077 I really started trying to pick this apart 717 00:34:04.111 --> 00:34:07.314 and go like, "what... What's at the core of this?" 718 00:34:07.347 --> 00:34:10.083 Because there's two things that are competing inside of me. 719 00:34:10.117 --> 00:34:12.787 One is that, um, I wanna be your partner, 720 00:34:12.820 --> 00:34:15.389 and I wanna be... I wanna be truly open 721 00:34:15.422 --> 00:34:17.692 to new experiences in the universe. 722 00:34:17.725 --> 00:34:19.827 Um, and the other side is, 723 00:34:19.861 --> 00:34:23.430 my dad was a homophobe, and I just let my wife 724 00:34:23.463 --> 00:34:25.365 fuck me in the ass, 725 00:34:25.399 --> 00:34:28.770 and so all of a sudden I felt like, 726 00:34:28.803 --> 00:34:30.638 "you're not a man." 727 00:34:30.672 --> 00:34:33.106 And then... and then, I started thinking about 728 00:34:33.140 --> 00:34:35.342 all of the therapy that I've had, 729 00:34:35.375 --> 00:34:37.512 and... and going like, 730 00:34:37.545 --> 00:34:40.347 "why is this... you know, why is this such an issue?" 731 00:34:40.380 --> 00:34:41.849 This shouldn't be such an issue, 732 00:34:41.883 --> 00:34:44.519 and maybe I would like it if we did it again. 733 00:34:44.552 --> 00:34:46.219 If I could get past the shame. 734 00:34:46.253 --> 00:34:48.856 If I could get past all the stuff that's built up 735 00:34:48.890 --> 00:34:51.158 in my head, and so I think in the same way 736 00:34:51.191 --> 00:34:53.695 that you had to 737 00:34:53.728 --> 00:34:56.831 go on your journey 738 00:34:56.864 --> 00:34:59.867 to feel more in control, 739 00:34:59.901 --> 00:35:04.404 and... and to feel powerful, 740 00:35:04.438 --> 00:35:06.774 I think I got some work to do, too. 741 00:35:06.808 --> 00:35:08.643 - Totally. - You know? 742 00:35:08.676 --> 00:35:11.813 Yeah, what do... What do you wanna do? 743 00:35:13.948 --> 00:35:16.551 I think I need to punch somebody in the face. 744 00:35:20.187 --> 00:35:21.756 That... 745 00:35:21.789 --> 00:35:24.792 And also, I think another important component 746 00:35:24.826 --> 00:35:29.363 of this is that I need to know what it feels like 747 00:35:29.396 --> 00:35:31.633 to actually take a full face punch. 748 00:35:33.601 --> 00:35:34.936 You want somebody to punch you...? 749 00:35:34.969 --> 00:35:38.673 Punch me in the face. 750 00:35:38.706 --> 00:35:41.475 I hate this. 751 00:35:45.479 --> 00:35:46.781 Okay, jab. 752 00:35:48.415 --> 00:35:49.951 - Hello! - One, two, one, two. 753 00:35:49.984 --> 00:35:52.319 Uh, hello, back here. 754 00:35:52.352 --> 00:35:54.187 Okay, give me a jab. 755 00:35:54.221 --> 00:35:55.923 - Hey, man. - Give me a jab. 756 00:35:55.957 --> 00:35:58.325 One, duck, two. 757 00:35:58.358 --> 00:36:00.928 - Hey, what's up? - Hey, what's up, man? 758 00:36:00.962 --> 00:36:02.362 Ah, it's good to see you. 759 00:36:02.396 --> 00:36:04.264 Hey, what's going on? I'm Elliot. 760 00:36:04.297 --> 00:36:05.767 - Hi. - What's your name? 761 00:36:05.800 --> 00:36:08.268 - I'm Josh. - Josh, nice to meet you. 762 00:36:08.301 --> 00:36:10.237 Elliot, Jackie, these are my friends. 763 00:36:10.270 --> 00:36:11.849 You guys look like you're hanging tough in here. 764 00:36:11.873 --> 00:36:13.508 Yeah, hooking it up... What's up, man? 765 00:36:13.541 --> 00:36:16.711 Uh, can I... can I steal you for, like, 3 minutes? 766 00:36:18.713 --> 00:36:19.857 - Uh, you cool with it? - Yeah. 767 00:36:19.881 --> 00:36:21.391 - Are we cool with that? - Is that cool? 768 00:36:21.415 --> 00:36:22.926 - 4 minutes, it'll be real quick. - Okay, a couple. 769 00:36:22.950 --> 00:36:24.819 - I got a little favor to ask. - It's fine. 770 00:36:24.852 --> 00:36:26.921 All right, Josh, 100 jumping Jacks. 771 00:36:26.954 --> 00:36:28.422 Count 'em out. 772 00:36:28.455 --> 00:36:29.700 When you're done, I'll be back, okay? 773 00:36:29.724 --> 00:36:31.291 - All right. - Okay. 774 00:36:31.324 --> 00:36:34.361 - I'll bring him right back. - All right. 775 00:36:34.394 --> 00:36:38.900 One, two, three, four, five... 776 00:36:38.933 --> 00:36:42.570 Um, so here's the thing. 777 00:36:42.603 --> 00:36:45.439 Yeah? 778 00:36:45.472 --> 00:36:47.508 I would like you to hit me in the face 779 00:36:47.542 --> 00:36:49.376 as hard as you can. 780 00:36:52.580 --> 00:36:53.881 Fight club. 781 00:36:53.915 --> 00:36:55.983 Hm? 782 00:36:56.017 --> 00:36:57.451 You're fight clubbing me? 783 00:36:57.484 --> 00:36:58.853 Hey, did you do a fight club to me? 784 00:37:00.621 --> 00:37:02.557 Oh, shit, that is from fight club, isn't it? 785 00:37:02.590 --> 00:37:05.325 No, I kinda... In the back of my head, 786 00:37:05.358 --> 00:37:08.495 I had some recognition, but I didn't realize 787 00:37:08.529 --> 00:37:10.330 - it was something... - It was it exactly. 788 00:37:10.363 --> 00:37:12.533 - That's exactly what it's from. - Yeah. 789 00:37:12.567 --> 00:37:14.736 Okay, so I know you have to get back in there. 790 00:37:14.769 --> 00:37:17.437 This is real quick, if you could just punch me, 791 00:37:17.471 --> 00:37:19.974 and, um, if it's okay... 792 00:37:20.007 --> 00:37:22.744 If it's okay, I'd love to be able to punch you back. 793 00:37:22.777 --> 00:37:24.879 - That would be super helpful. - I can't tell 794 00:37:24.912 --> 00:37:26.379 if you guys are fucking with me. 795 00:37:26.413 --> 00:37:28.616 - Is this real? - It... 796 00:37:28.649 --> 00:37:30.350 Yeah. 797 00:37:32.319 --> 00:37:33.921 - No, no way. - Okay, um. 798 00:37:33.955 --> 00:37:35.065 You're out of your fucking mind. 799 00:37:35.089 --> 00:37:35.957 I'm not gonna punch you. 800 00:37:35.990 --> 00:37:38.291 - Here, here's the thing. - In the face? 801 00:37:38.325 --> 00:37:39.994 I swear to god I won't be upset. 802 00:37:40.027 --> 00:37:41.461 I won't either. 803 00:37:41.495 --> 00:37:42.530 She won't either. 804 00:37:42.563 --> 00:37:43.831 Okay, here's the thing. 805 00:37:43.865 --> 00:37:45.633 Do you remember at our baby shower 806 00:37:45.666 --> 00:37:46.910 when you came up to me at the end, 807 00:37:46.934 --> 00:37:48.603 and you hugged me, and you were just like, 808 00:37:48.636 --> 00:37:49.904 "brother, anything you need... 809 00:37:49.937 --> 00:37:51.773 - Yeah. - Anything at all?" 810 00:37:51.806 --> 00:37:54.041 - Yeah, I... - This is it. 811 00:37:54.075 --> 00:37:55.375 Not gonna do it, I'm sorry. 812 00:37:55.408 --> 00:37:56.644 - I lied to you. - This is it. 813 00:37:56.677 --> 00:37:58.345 I can't. 814 00:37:58.378 --> 00:37:59.523 - I've... - Okay, so I'll tell, 815 00:37:59.547 --> 00:38:00.991 I'll tell, I'll tell you why, I'll tell you why 816 00:38:01.015 --> 00:38:02.626 'cause I do think it'll make a difference. 817 00:38:02.650 --> 00:38:03.416 It's this thing that. 818 00:38:03.450 --> 00:38:04.628 - Jackie and I are doing... - Okay. 819 00:38:04.652 --> 00:38:07.021 Because, uh, because we're about to have a baby... 820 00:38:07.054 --> 00:38:07.955 - Yeah, yeah. - And we're trying to become 821 00:38:07.989 --> 00:38:09.489 fully realized humans. 822 00:38:09.524 --> 00:38:10.801 I mean, you know, I've talked to you about 823 00:38:10.825 --> 00:38:12.392 my dad stuff, my rape stuff. 824 00:38:12.425 --> 00:38:13.661 You know, I've been in therapy 825 00:38:13.694 --> 00:38:16.030 since I was fuckin' 18 years old. 826 00:38:16.063 --> 00:38:18.633 And, obviously, you know, they're like, 827 00:38:18.666 --> 00:38:19.834 "you shouldn't punch people." 828 00:38:19.867 --> 00:38:22.804 So, I punch walls, I, like, kick things, 829 00:38:22.837 --> 00:38:25.640 but what I've never done in my entire life 830 00:38:25.673 --> 00:38:27.575 is I've never been punched in the face. 831 00:38:27.608 --> 00:38:28.375 And my dad used to do 832 00:38:28.408 --> 00:38:30.077 - this to me all the time. - Yeah. 833 00:38:30.111 --> 00:38:34.048 So, I am so afraid of this, and I just, I, I just need, 834 00:38:34.081 --> 00:38:35.458 - I need the full thing. - Not happening. 835 00:38:35.482 --> 00:38:38.418 I appreciate everything you just told me. 836 00:38:38.451 --> 00:38:41.122 I'm sorry you had a mean dad. 837 00:38:41.155 --> 00:38:43.991 And whatever you guys are going through 838 00:38:44.025 --> 00:38:45.092 feels weird. 839 00:38:45.126 --> 00:38:47.728 Uh, I can't help you with this. 840 00:38:47.762 --> 00:38:50.097 I'm facing 841 00:38:50.131 --> 00:38:52.133 my biggest fear. 842 00:38:52.166 --> 00:38:55.435 This wall of fear. 843 00:38:55.468 --> 00:38:57.505 And her and I together, 844 00:38:57.538 --> 00:39:00.775 are gonna get over that fuckin' wall. 845 00:39:00.808 --> 00:39:01.742 Cool, man. 846 00:39:01.776 --> 00:39:03.044 So we can be... 847 00:39:03.077 --> 00:39:05.146 I'm not goin' over the wall with you. 848 00:39:05.179 --> 00:39:08.115 I don't need you to, I just need you to punch me. 849 00:39:08.149 --> 00:39:09.660 There's a kid in the other room waiting. 850 00:39:09.684 --> 00:39:11.451 You punch guys in the face 851 00:39:11.484 --> 00:39:12.485 - every day! - Yeah, 852 00:39:12.520 --> 00:39:14.655 'cause I don't care about them, and also... 853 00:39:14.689 --> 00:39:16.624 Okay, can I punch you in the face? 854 00:39:16.657 --> 00:39:18.491 - No. - Please? 855 00:39:18.526 --> 00:39:19.927 Absolutely not. 856 00:39:19.961 --> 00:39:21.963 I just need to punch you in the face. 857 00:39:21.996 --> 00:39:23.764 - Well, okay. - Dude, no. 858 00:39:23.798 --> 00:39:25.633 One of the two is gonna happen. 859 00:39:25.666 --> 00:39:27.034 Neither of the two are gonna 860 00:39:27.068 --> 00:39:28.512 - happen actually. - Okay, punch me in the face. 861 00:39:28.536 --> 00:39:30.771 - I am not gonna... - Punch me in the face. 862 00:39:30.805 --> 00:39:31.949 - Elliot, I'm not gonna... - Punch me in the face. 863 00:39:31.973 --> 00:39:32.840 - I'm not punching... - I'm gonna punch you in the face 864 00:39:32.874 --> 00:39:34.542 if you don't punch me in the face. 865 00:39:34.575 --> 00:39:35.475 I'm gonna punch you in the face. 866 00:39:35.509 --> 00:39:37.511 You're not gonna punch me in the face. 867 00:39:37.545 --> 00:39:38.622 I'm gonna... punch me in the face! 868 00:39:38.646 --> 00:39:39.446 - No one's getting punched. - Punch me in the face! 869 00:39:39.479 --> 00:39:40.413 How 'bout this, no one's fucking 870 00:39:40.447 --> 00:39:42.083 - getting punched. - I'm gonna punch you! 871 00:39:42.116 --> 00:39:43.450 Ah! 872 00:39:45.019 --> 00:39:46.621 Ho! 873 00:39:46.654 --> 00:39:47.889 Ooh. 874 00:39:47.922 --> 00:39:49.156 That was... 875 00:39:49.190 --> 00:39:50.625 Are you bleeding? 876 00:39:50.658 --> 00:39:52.627 - Ah, shit. - You're fuckin' bleeding. 877 00:39:52.660 --> 00:39:53.594 - Oh, brother! - Fuckin' damn it, man. 878 00:39:53.628 --> 00:39:54.996 I'm sorry, but that was amazing! 879 00:39:55.029 --> 00:39:56.607 - What are you doing? - Come on, that was amazing. 880 00:39:56.631 --> 00:39:58.175 That wasn't amazing, that was ridiculous. 881 00:39:58.199 --> 00:39:59.432 Get the fuck outta here. 882 00:39:59.466 --> 00:40:00.544 Josh, go in the other room. 883 00:40:00.568 --> 00:40:02.469 - Oh! - Okay, okay, so you're mad. 884 00:40:02.503 --> 00:40:04.105 - Jackie... - So, punch me in the face! 885 00:40:04.138 --> 00:40:04.972 - I'm gonna... - Come on, come on, come on, 886 00:40:05.006 --> 00:40:06.116 - come on, come on. - I need you to go. 887 00:40:06.140 --> 00:40:07.380 Dude, dude, dude, dude, come... 888 00:40:09.844 --> 00:40:11.212 Oh! 889 00:40:11.245 --> 00:40:13.581 - Oh! - Dude, I'm sorry. 890 00:40:13.614 --> 00:40:14.982 Oh! 891 00:40:15.016 --> 00:40:15.917 - Hey! - Honey, honey. 892 00:40:15.950 --> 00:40:18.152 - Elliot, I'm sorry. - Oh, it's okay. 893 00:40:18.185 --> 00:40:19.520 Flip over. 894 00:40:19.553 --> 00:40:21.989 Oh, my god. 895 00:40:22.023 --> 00:40:23.891 Dude, I'm so sorry. 896 00:40:23.925 --> 00:40:24.992 Elliot, I'm so sorry. 897 00:40:27.962 --> 00:40:29.196 You're okay? 898 00:40:29.230 --> 00:40:30.564 Yeah. 899 00:40:30.598 --> 00:40:33.534 - He's okay! - Oh, I went out. 900 00:40:33.567 --> 00:40:35.569 - I went out! - Yeah. 901 00:40:35.603 --> 00:40:36.637 Oh, that really... 902 00:40:36.671 --> 00:40:38.572 - Fuck you! - That was crazy! 903 00:40:38.606 --> 00:40:39.917 Can I help you, let me help you both up, 904 00:40:39.941 --> 00:40:41.676 then you can get the fuck out, okay? 905 00:40:41.709 --> 00:40:43.020 - Sorry. You did it! - Do I have a black eye? 906 00:40:43.044 --> 00:40:43.844 - You do a little bit! - Yeah, you have a black eye 907 00:40:43.878 --> 00:40:45.055 'cause you're a fuckin' idiot. 908 00:40:45.079 --> 00:40:45.880 Now, can you please leave? 909 00:40:45.913 --> 00:40:47.648 Dude, I know you're upset, but... 910 00:40:47.682 --> 00:40:48.959 - You have no idea. - It's the best thing 911 00:40:48.983 --> 00:40:49.684 - in my entire life. - I don't wanna 912 00:40:49.717 --> 00:40:50.827 - hear it right now. - Can I? 913 00:40:50.851 --> 00:40:51.686 No, don't touch me. 914 00:40:51.719 --> 00:40:54.121 Okay, some day you're gonna understand. 915 00:40:54.155 --> 00:40:55.089 No, I won't! 916 00:40:55.122 --> 00:40:56.824 You'll be lucky if we talk some day soon. 917 00:40:56.857 --> 00:40:57.758 - Get the fuck out, Elliot. - I love you. 918 00:40:57.792 --> 00:40:59.260 - No, Jackie. - Let's get out. 919 00:40:59.293 --> 00:41:01.529 - Okay, I feel you. - Let's go. Thank you. 920 00:41:01.562 --> 00:41:04.598 No, don't thank me, just fuckin' go. 921 00:43:06.887 --> 00:43:07.855 First of all, we have to 922 00:43:07.888 --> 00:43:09.056 - thank you. - Oh, my god. 923 00:43:09.090 --> 00:43:10.925 The things you said to us 924 00:43:10.958 --> 00:43:12.235 - resonated. - Something broke open. 925 00:43:12.259 --> 00:43:13.160 - You asked the question... - You were like, 926 00:43:13.194 --> 00:43:14.271 - "what do you need? - "What do you need?" 927 00:43:14.295 --> 00:43:17.364 I've never been this confident in my entire life! 928 00:43:17.398 --> 00:43:19.300 That's, that's, that's great! 929 00:43:19.333 --> 00:43:22.336 Also, when you were saying you gotta trust each other, 930 00:43:22.369 --> 00:43:24.839 - and, like, fuck everybody else. - And fuck everybody else! 931 00:43:24.872 --> 00:43:26.874 Everything in us went, "whoa!" 932 00:43:26.907 --> 00:43:28.342 - "Break the cycle." - Like, stop. 933 00:43:28.375 --> 00:43:29.310 What do we need? 934 00:43:29.343 --> 00:43:31.188 - What would do that? - Yeah, 'cause all that... 935 00:43:31.212 --> 00:43:32.656 - And the oxytocin... - Everything you, 936 00:43:32.680 --> 00:43:35.216 everything you said made sense in our brains, 937 00:43:35.249 --> 00:43:36.860 - but we've never put it... - But we had to do it. 938 00:43:36.884 --> 00:43:38.719 - Into effect. - Got it. 939 00:43:38.752 --> 00:43:41.088 And more stuff with my dad, obviously. 940 00:43:41.122 --> 00:43:44.225 - But, like, the thing... - Her dad's money, 941 00:43:44.258 --> 00:43:45.025 - drugs. - I realized 942 00:43:45.059 --> 00:43:47.995 I needed, sexually, to give it. 943 00:43:48.028 --> 00:43:50.264 - I needed to fuck him. - She wanted to fuck me. 944 00:43:50.297 --> 00:43:52.867 It just seemed like the only answer.. 945 00:43:52.900 --> 00:43:55.703 So we went to a shop, and we got a strap-on, 946 00:43:55.736 --> 00:43:56.913 - and then we went home... - And then... 947 00:43:56.937 --> 00:43:57.838 and we did it, 948 00:43:57.872 --> 00:43:59.940 and it hurt, 949 00:43:59.974 --> 00:44:00.875 um, for me. 950 00:44:00.908 --> 00:44:02.343 For you... 951 00:44:02.376 --> 00:44:04.879 Great, but emotionally, 952 00:44:04.912 --> 00:44:08.782 - I felt like a rock star. - Mm-hm. 953 00:44:08.816 --> 00:44:10.918 - And then... - And then, I cried. 954 00:44:10.951 --> 00:44:13.120 I mean, I didn't cry around you because I didn't, 955 00:44:13.154 --> 00:44:15.389 I didn't want that to tamp down, 956 00:44:15.422 --> 00:44:17.367 - you know, your moment because... - And how nice is that? 957 00:44:17.391 --> 00:44:18.993 And then it, the chain reaction. 958 00:44:19.026 --> 00:44:21.729 Somehow, the pavlovian connection between 959 00:44:21.762 --> 00:44:24.098 masculinity, and sexuality, 960 00:44:24.131 --> 00:44:28.469 and violence, the smallness I felt, 961 00:44:28.502 --> 00:44:30.704 I was six years old again. 962 00:44:30.738 --> 00:44:34.074 And I was sitting at my kitchen table 963 00:44:34.108 --> 00:44:36.043 in my childhood house, 964 00:44:36.076 --> 00:44:39.380 and I just spilled a glass of orange juice. 965 00:44:39.413 --> 00:44:41.048 And my father turned, and he, 966 00:44:41.081 --> 00:44:43.851 and he cocked a fist like he was gonna punch me 967 00:44:43.884 --> 00:44:47.788 because I spilled a fucking glass of orange juice, okay? 968 00:44:47.821 --> 00:44:52.059 And that fear has dictated 969 00:44:52.092 --> 00:44:54.128 so many of the choices that I've made 970 00:44:54.161 --> 00:44:57.164 - my entire life. - Like, the cycle of backing away 971 00:44:57.198 --> 00:44:59.900 from that energy had to break. 972 00:44:59.934 --> 00:45:01.468 Because I'm a grown-ass man, 973 00:45:01.502 --> 00:45:03.437 and I'm about to be a father. 974 00:45:03.470 --> 00:45:05.039 And so, I can't be scared. 975 00:45:05.072 --> 00:45:07.174 I can't be scared of a fist, 976 00:45:07.208 --> 00:45:09.176 or, like, a plastic dick 977 00:45:09.210 --> 00:45:11.946 the way that I have been my entire life. 978 00:45:11.979 --> 00:45:14.014 So, I went to visit my friend. 979 00:45:14.048 --> 00:45:16.784 - It was amazing! - And I punched him in the face! 980 00:45:16.817 --> 00:45:18.285 And he didn't... 981 00:45:18.319 --> 00:45:19.453 I asked him at first, 982 00:45:19.486 --> 00:45:21.355 I was like, "can I, can I..." 983 00:45:21.388 --> 00:45:23.190 Well, I asked him if he'd punch me, 984 00:45:23.224 --> 00:45:25.159 and he was like, "no, I'm not gonna punch you." 985 00:45:25.192 --> 00:45:26.504 And I was like, "come on, please, punch me." 986 00:45:26.528 --> 00:45:28.488 - And he was like, "no!" - Like, don't be a pussy! 987 00:45:30.431 --> 00:45:32.199 - I punched him! - Got it. 988 00:45:32.233 --> 00:45:34.868 And then he still wouldn't punch me! 989 00:45:34.902 --> 00:45:35.902 So then... 990 00:45:38.540 --> 00:45:40.307 - I was amazed. - And then, 991 00:45:40.341 --> 00:45:43.444 and then I saw it happen on his face when he was just like... 992 00:45:43.477 --> 00:45:45.212 And then, he was like 993 00:45:45.246 --> 00:45:46.548 black out. 994 00:45:48.816 --> 00:45:51.118 Just punched me in the face. 995 00:45:51.151 --> 00:45:52.453 It was the best. 996 00:45:52.486 --> 00:45:54.088 And then, and then... 997 00:45:56.023 --> 00:45:58.926 and then I'm seeing stars for a second. 998 00:45:58.959 --> 00:46:00.562 But, I could tell, like... 999 00:46:00.595 --> 00:46:02.329 But then I came up, 1000 00:46:02.363 --> 00:46:07.468 - and I was clear as day. - Yeah. 1001 00:46:07.501 --> 00:46:08.646 You know what, give me a second. 1002 00:46:08.670 --> 00:46:13.541 I'll be right back, I'm just gonna grab something. 1003 00:46:13.575 --> 00:46:15.109 She's the bomb. 1004 00:46:15.142 --> 00:46:17.011 Yeah. 1005 00:46:17.044 --> 00:46:18.513 Oh, man. 1006 00:46:18.546 --> 00:46:21.015 I could take a nap. 1007 00:46:21.048 --> 00:46:22.550 Yeah. 1008 00:46:22.584 --> 00:46:23.417 Maybe I'll take a nap. 1009 00:46:23.450 --> 00:46:24.385 Can we go take a nap? 1010 00:46:24.418 --> 00:46:26.320 - Wanna go take a nap? - Just a midday nap? 1011 00:46:26.353 --> 00:46:27.921 And then go to a rave? 1012 00:46:27.955 --> 00:46:29.823 How 'bout the zoo? 1013 00:46:29.857 --> 00:46:31.025 You wanna go to the zoo? 1014 00:46:31.058 --> 00:46:32.459 I think they have pandas there now. 1015 00:46:32.493 --> 00:46:34.161 Did they get pandas at the zoo? 1016 00:46:34.194 --> 00:46:36.063 So, this is for you. 1017 00:46:36.096 --> 00:46:37.398 What's this? 1018 00:46:37.431 --> 00:46:40.467 It's a full refund. 1019 00:46:40.501 --> 00:46:42.570 - Um. - You deserve it! 1020 00:46:42.604 --> 00:46:44.171 You deserve so much more than this. 1021 00:46:44.204 --> 00:46:45.873 It's really okay. 1022 00:46:45.906 --> 00:46:48.375 I don't think there's any amount of money that 1023 00:46:48.409 --> 00:46:49.376 either of you could give me 1024 00:46:49.410 --> 00:46:52.413 that would make it okay for us to work together. 1025 00:46:55.015 --> 00:46:56.450 Wha... 1026 00:46:56.483 --> 00:46:59.253 This whole thing, the eye, 1027 00:46:59.286 --> 00:47:02.222 the battery, the pegging, 1028 00:47:02.256 --> 00:47:04.100 - just there's a lot of... - I don't think it's battery. 1029 00:47:04.124 --> 00:47:06.528 There's a lot of liability issues here that 1030 00:47:06.561 --> 00:47:09.396 just make me feel super uncomfortable. 1031 00:47:09.430 --> 00:47:13.233 So, I think it's probably gonna be best if both of you just 1032 00:47:13.267 --> 00:47:14.344 - get up... - Wait a minute. 1033 00:47:14.368 --> 00:47:17.338 - And leave. - Wait a minute. 1034 00:47:17.371 --> 00:47:20.608 - Babe? - Wait a minute. 1035 00:47:20.642 --> 00:47:22.109 So, wait. 1036 00:47:24.178 --> 00:47:26.347 - You want us to go? - Yeah. 1037 00:47:26.380 --> 00:47:28.082 Are you still gonna be our doula? 1038 00:47:28.115 --> 00:47:30.552 No, no doula. 1039 00:47:30.585 --> 00:47:32.119 All done. 1040 00:47:32.152 --> 00:47:33.220 Finito. 1041 00:47:33.253 --> 00:47:36.457 Need you both to get up, and leave. 1042 00:47:43.197 --> 00:47:45.366 The thing that's just, like, 1043 00:47:45.399 --> 00:47:48.670 nuts is that it's not evident, and it's not so apparent 1044 00:47:48.703 --> 00:47:51.205 - that this is amazing. - Other people don't get it. 1045 00:47:51.238 --> 00:47:52.640 No, it's incredible. 1046 00:47:52.674 --> 00:47:54.542 How do other people not get it? 1047 00:47:54.576 --> 00:47:55.976 I mean, and that's hard. 1048 00:47:56.009 --> 00:47:58.412 If I didn't have you, I'd be so lonely. 1049 00:47:58.445 --> 00:48:01.048 - Honey! - To have these revelations, 1050 00:48:01.081 --> 00:48:02.449 - to really... - I see them, 1051 00:48:02.483 --> 00:48:04.118 I see what you're going through. 1052 00:48:04.151 --> 00:48:06.954 Have my brain break open in these ways. 1053 00:48:06.987 --> 00:48:09.056 And have other people look at it and go like, 1054 00:48:09.089 --> 00:48:10.391 "eh, not into it." 1055 00:48:10.424 --> 00:48:13.528 It's so weird 'cause I see you. 1056 00:48:13.561 --> 00:48:15.996 - You see me. - And look, I get it with Zach. 1057 00:48:16.029 --> 00:48:18.265 Like, I punched my dear friend in the face, 1058 00:48:18.298 --> 00:48:19.976 - and that might have been... - Zach? Yeah. 1059 00:48:20.000 --> 00:48:20.702 A little fucked up... 1060 00:48:20.735 --> 00:48:22.637 - But Maya. - But still! 1061 00:48:22.670 --> 00:48:26.541 - Maya. - She, like, talks the talk, 1062 00:48:26.574 --> 00:48:28.510 - but doesn't walk the walk. - Walk the walk. 1063 00:48:28.543 --> 00:48:30.277 No, she's a fake truth teller. 1064 00:48:30.310 --> 00:48:33.280 Yeah, she's living in her own lies. 1065 00:48:33.313 --> 00:48:36.049 Well, I think you, I think we live in a culture 1066 00:48:36.083 --> 00:48:38.118 that's not prepared for the truth. 1067 00:48:38.152 --> 00:48:39.195 I think we live in a culture 1068 00:48:39.219 --> 00:48:41.556 - that can't handle the truth. - I think we do. 1069 00:48:41.589 --> 00:48:43.390 'Cause it's just easier to lie to each other. 1070 00:48:43.424 --> 00:48:45.527 It is, like, how many times has your mom been like, 1071 00:48:45.560 --> 00:48:47.638 "do you like the casserole?" And I'm like, "I love it!" 1072 00:48:47.662 --> 00:48:49.096 Oh, exactly, and how many times 1073 00:48:49.129 --> 00:48:50.708 has my mom been like, "was I a good mother?" 1074 00:48:50.732 --> 00:48:52.966 And I'm like, "of course, mom." 1075 00:48:53.000 --> 00:48:54.201 We do it, why? 1076 00:48:54.234 --> 00:48:55.969 Just because it's easier. 1077 00:48:56.003 --> 00:48:58.238 It's just like a path of least resistance. 1078 00:48:58.272 --> 00:49:00.407 I know, and that's why we're so fucked! 1079 00:49:00.441 --> 00:49:02.710 We're fucked as a country because of this 1080 00:49:02.744 --> 00:49:06.113 - epidemic of lying. - We're fucked as a world. 1081 00:49:06.146 --> 00:49:08.148 Maybe we have been afraid of that with each other. 1082 00:49:08.182 --> 00:49:09.116 That's why we had a... 1083 00:49:09.149 --> 00:49:10.752 And now, for the first time, we're like, 1084 00:49:10.785 --> 00:49:12.720 "I can totally show you me, 1085 00:49:12.754 --> 00:49:14.188 and you can totally show me you." 1086 00:49:14.221 --> 00:49:16.132 - We can just, like, be like... - And we love it! 1087 00:49:16.156 --> 00:49:17.324 Like, "this is me." 1088 00:49:17.357 --> 00:49:18.760 - This is me. - This is me. 1089 00:49:18.793 --> 00:49:21.395 - And I love you! - And I love you! 1090 00:49:21.428 --> 00:49:23.130 You are everything! 1091 00:49:23.163 --> 00:49:26.066 - You are everything to me, babe. - Oh. 1092 00:49:26.099 --> 00:49:28.202 I trust you more than anyone. 1093 00:49:28.235 --> 00:49:31.773 I trust you more than anyone. 1094 00:49:31.806 --> 00:49:34.208 And you're gonna have my baby. 1095 00:49:34.241 --> 00:49:35.677 - And... - I've been thinkin'. 1096 00:49:35.710 --> 00:49:36.578 What are you thinkin'? 1097 00:49:36.611 --> 00:49:38.580 - Since this whole Maya thing. - Uh-huh. 1098 00:49:38.613 --> 00:49:41.148 Like, "ah, where we gonna find a doula now?" 1099 00:49:41.181 --> 00:49:43.661 - I know what you're thinkin'. - I don't, I don't think we need 1100 00:49:43.685 --> 00:49:45.753 some other stranger coming into this. 1101 00:49:45.787 --> 00:49:48.222 We don't need anybody else comin' in 1102 00:49:48.255 --> 00:49:51.091 and coaching us on what the truth 1103 00:49:51.124 --> 00:49:52.459 of our experience is, 1104 00:49:52.493 --> 00:49:54.394 bringing our baby into the world. 1105 00:49:54.428 --> 00:49:58.198 I think you can be my doula. 1106 00:49:58.232 --> 00:50:00.267 I've never seen a better doula... 1107 00:50:00.300 --> 00:50:01.101 - That makes me... - Than the one right in 1108 00:50:01.134 --> 00:50:04.037 - front of me. - Makes me wanna cry. 1109 00:50:04.071 --> 00:50:07.107 - But, you're right. - You can take the pain. 1110 00:50:57.424 --> 00:50:59.694 We should probably get back before it gets dark. 1111 00:51:02.262 --> 00:51:03.831 Okay. 1112 00:51:03.865 --> 00:51:05.299 Let's go. 1113 00:51:11.238 --> 00:51:13.508 No! There's not a path over here! 1114 00:51:13.541 --> 00:51:15.442 There's not a path over here! 1115 00:51:15.475 --> 00:51:17.177 It can't be that far. 1116 00:51:17.210 --> 00:51:19.146 We were just on the fucking path! 1117 00:51:19.179 --> 00:51:20.480 No, we weren't just on the path. 1118 00:51:20.515 --> 00:51:21.481 We were just on the path. 1119 00:51:21.516 --> 00:51:22.660 - We were coming down it. - By "just," do you mean 1120 00:51:22.684 --> 00:51:24.484 20 minutes ago? 1121 00:51:24.519 --> 00:51:25.853 Now we're way off! 1122 00:51:25.887 --> 00:51:28.288 - Okay. - Would you stop going up there? 1123 00:51:28.322 --> 00:51:31.124 I really know the path is not up there. 1124 00:51:31.158 --> 00:51:33.595 I think we might have to go back up 1125 00:51:33.628 --> 00:51:34.762 to go back down. 1126 00:51:34.796 --> 00:51:36.531 But down is clearly the direction 1127 00:51:36.564 --> 00:51:38.666 we need to generally be going. 1128 00:51:40.267 --> 00:51:43.170 Um. 1129 00:51:43.203 --> 00:51:44.606 Let's go, let's go this way. 1130 00:51:44.639 --> 00:51:45.439 Yeah, okay. 1131 00:51:45.472 --> 00:51:47.875 Yeah, I think down is a good idea. 1132 00:51:47.909 --> 00:51:50.678 - Ow! Ow. - Ow. 1133 00:51:50.712 --> 00:51:53.180 - Ah! Ah! Fuck! - Oh, my gosh. 1134 00:51:53.213 --> 00:51:55.617 - Okay, okay. - We're... we've gone. 1135 00:51:55.650 --> 00:51:57.518 No, we're totally off the fucking path. 1136 00:51:57.552 --> 00:51:58.485 - I understand that. - Will you keep your 1137 00:51:58.519 --> 00:52:01.188 - voice down? - Can you not be condescending 1138 00:52:01.221 --> 00:52:02.332 - right now? - I'm asking you 1139 00:52:02.356 --> 00:52:04.892 to keep your voice down for a very practical reason 1140 00:52:04.926 --> 00:52:06.369 - because I feel like... - Yeah, what's the practical 1141 00:52:06.393 --> 00:52:07.327 - reason? - We're like, 1142 00:52:07.361 --> 00:52:09.897 like shouting, like, "help, we're lost." 1143 00:52:09.931 --> 00:52:12.700 Like, "help, ow! Ow!" 1144 00:52:12.734 --> 00:52:14.645 - Okay, can, can you... - If there are gangs out here, 1145 00:52:14.669 --> 00:52:16.203 - they're just gonna like... - Jackie. 1146 00:52:16.236 --> 00:52:18.271 - Jackie, Jackie, Jackie! - What? 1147 00:52:18.305 --> 00:52:21.509 Can I just talk for ten seconds 1148 00:52:21.542 --> 00:52:24.512 without you getting all fucking vicious on me? 1149 00:52:24.545 --> 00:52:26.279 I'd like to make a suggestion. 1150 00:52:26.313 --> 00:52:28.415 Mm-hm? 1151 00:52:28.448 --> 00:52:31.418 Okay, do you remember that podcast 1152 00:52:31.451 --> 00:52:33.286 that we were listening to 1153 00:52:33.320 --> 00:52:36.223 where the two guys went hiking in muir beach 1154 00:52:36.256 --> 00:52:37.959 up by San Francisco? 1155 00:52:37.992 --> 00:52:41.395 And they got up to the top, and it was dark, 1156 00:52:41.428 --> 00:52:42.329 and one guy was like, 1157 00:52:42.362 --> 00:52:44.231 "let's just stop here for the night." 1158 00:52:44.264 --> 00:52:46.299 And the other guy was like, "I'm gonna keep going. 1159 00:52:46.333 --> 00:52:47.645 - "I'm just gonna push through." - You're not suggesting 1160 00:52:47.669 --> 00:52:48.903 that we are stopping. 1161 00:52:48.936 --> 00:52:50.972 But the second guy, the guy who kept going, 1162 00:52:51.005 --> 00:52:52.540 he fell off the fucking cliff. 1163 00:52:52.573 --> 00:52:54.441 And the guy who stayed there, 1164 00:52:54.474 --> 00:52:56.978 he found that other guy's body the next morning 1165 00:52:57.011 --> 00:52:59.647 - with his head bashed in! - We're not just gonna 1166 00:52:59.681 --> 00:53:01.549 sit like ducks 1167 00:53:01.582 --> 00:53:02.926 - out in the middle of the woods! - I'm trying to do 1168 00:53:02.950 --> 00:53:04.652 the safest thing. 1169 00:53:04.686 --> 00:53:06.286 I'm trying to do the safest thing 1170 00:53:06.319 --> 00:53:08.589 for me, and you, and our baby. 1171 00:53:08.623 --> 00:53:10.825 - And you can sleep... - Honey, just 'cause you hit 1172 00:53:10.858 --> 00:53:11.893 one guy! 1173 00:53:11.926 --> 00:53:13.537 - You hit one guy... - I'll put my coat on you. 1174 00:53:13.561 --> 00:53:14.805 - And now you think... - I'll make a fire. 1175 00:53:14.829 --> 00:53:16.931 If we get attacked by multiple people, 1176 00:53:16.964 --> 00:53:18.533 or animals, or whatever, 1177 00:53:18.566 --> 00:53:20.434 that you're gonna be able to, like, 1178 00:53:20.467 --> 00:53:21.936 get us through the night? 1179 00:53:21.969 --> 00:53:23.604 Honestly! 1180 00:53:25.506 --> 00:53:28.475 That was really mean. 1181 00:53:28.509 --> 00:53:29.443 - I'm just... - I mean, that was, 1182 00:53:29.476 --> 00:53:30.978 that was, like... 1183 00:53:31.012 --> 00:53:34.414 Hitting that guy, you know that was my thing. 1184 00:53:34.448 --> 00:53:35.917 - And... - You know that that, 1185 00:53:35.950 --> 00:53:39.020 - you know what a huge... - I know internally 1186 00:53:39.053 --> 00:53:40.555 - that that was... - Demarcation 1187 00:53:40.588 --> 00:53:42.557 that was to make me feel 1188 00:53:42.590 --> 00:53:44.759 like I could be a protector 1189 00:53:44.792 --> 00:53:46.794 of you, and our child, 1190 00:53:46.828 --> 00:53:49.296 - and our family, and now I do... - Like... 1191 00:53:49.329 --> 00:53:50.397 and now, and now I do. 1192 00:53:50.430 --> 00:53:52.867 And you said you trusted me, you said you wanted me 1193 00:53:52.900 --> 00:53:54.678 - to be your doula! - I didn't say that I wanted 1194 00:53:54.702 --> 00:53:56.938 - to sleep in the woods. - It's not fucking fair! 1195 00:53:56.971 --> 00:53:59.372 I'm not a baby, I'm not a fucking child! 1196 00:53:59.406 --> 00:54:00.984 - I'm not drawing a line. - I'm not a goddamn junkie 1197 00:54:01.008 --> 00:54:02.442 like your father! 1198 00:54:02.476 --> 00:54:05.278 Why would you say that? 1199 00:54:05.312 --> 00:54:07.280 What? Is that an unfair thing? 1200 00:54:07.314 --> 00:54:10.350 Is that an untrue thing? 1201 00:54:10.383 --> 00:54:11.853 How... 1202 00:54:11.886 --> 00:54:13.721 I have nothing to say to you. 1203 00:54:13.755 --> 00:54:16.858 I have nothing to say to you. 1204 00:54:16.891 --> 00:54:18.993 I hope that we can do the rest of this 1205 00:54:19.026 --> 00:54:21.996 silently, or just part our ways out here. 1206 00:54:22.029 --> 00:54:23.564 Okay, but what if the thing happens 1207 00:54:23.598 --> 00:54:25.032 that happened in the podcast? 1208 00:54:27.769 --> 00:54:29.737 Well, it was meant to be. 1209 00:54:41.381 --> 00:54:43.951 Look, I'm sorry, okay? 1210 00:54:43.985 --> 00:54:46.521 That shouldn't have been aimed at you. 1211 00:54:46.554 --> 00:54:47.889 No? 1212 00:54:47.922 --> 00:54:50.558 Who should it have been aimed at, Elliot? 1213 00:55:39.507 --> 00:55:40.541 Do you like it? 1214 00:55:40.575 --> 00:55:42.442 Yeah! 1215 00:55:42.475 --> 00:55:43.611 Sort of picks up this... 1216 00:55:43.644 --> 00:55:46.113 Does anybody need anything else? 1217 00:55:46.147 --> 00:55:48.850 More coffee, or... no. 1218 00:55:48.883 --> 00:55:51.853 When is the baby actually due? 1219 00:55:51.886 --> 00:55:53.955 Uh, one more month. 1220 00:55:53.988 --> 00:55:55.790 Four weeks. 1221 00:55:55.823 --> 00:55:56.924 No more drinks? 1222 00:55:56.958 --> 00:55:57.892 Good, we good? 1223 00:55:57.925 --> 00:55:59.459 Everybody cool? 1224 00:55:59.492 --> 00:56:00.828 For a little while. 1225 00:56:00.862 --> 00:56:03.496 I'm so worried about your eye, honey. 1226 00:56:03.531 --> 00:56:05.408 - My eye's okay. - Don't you think we need to put 1227 00:56:05.432 --> 00:56:06.910 - ice on it? - No, it actually doesn't hurt 1228 00:56:06.934 --> 00:56:07.735 at all anymore. 1229 00:56:07.768 --> 00:56:09.937 It really hurt at first, but it hurt... 1230 00:56:09.971 --> 00:56:10.905 I'll tell ya about it later. 1231 00:56:10.938 --> 00:56:12.472 - Bob? - Hey, dad? 1232 00:56:12.506 --> 00:56:13.841 Bob? 1233 00:56:13.875 --> 00:56:14.942 Yeah? 1234 00:56:14.976 --> 00:56:16.878 Will you come over here? 1235 00:56:16.911 --> 00:56:18.813 Sure, sure. 1236 00:56:23.017 --> 00:56:24.552 Here we go! 1237 00:56:26.787 --> 00:56:27.755 Here I am. 1238 00:56:27.788 --> 00:56:31.458 - Hey! - Hey, thanks! 1239 00:56:31.491 --> 00:56:32.491 So. 1240 00:56:34.228 --> 00:56:37.064 I know it's weird, it's like we've called this meeting. 1241 00:56:37.098 --> 00:56:39.499 - Here! Here! - We've called you here... 1242 00:56:39.533 --> 00:56:42.770 - Today. - Today to, uh, 1243 00:56:42.803 --> 00:56:45.438 - well, I'm joking around. - Well, we have, we have 1244 00:56:45.472 --> 00:56:48.075 because we, um... 1245 00:56:48.109 --> 00:56:49.644 We've been going through this 1246 00:56:49.677 --> 00:56:52.479 intense transformation. 1247 00:56:52.513 --> 00:56:54.882 We've been on kind of a quest. 1248 00:56:54.916 --> 00:56:56.617 - Mm. - Hm. 1249 00:56:56.651 --> 00:57:00.922 And, um, we've had some revelations 1250 00:57:00.955 --> 00:57:02.489 - that we'd... - Oh! 1251 00:57:02.523 --> 00:57:04.792 And we wanted to share those with you guys. 1252 00:57:06.861 --> 00:57:09.096 - Yeah. - Great hummus. 1253 00:57:09.130 --> 00:57:10.765 Thank you. 1254 00:57:10.798 --> 00:57:13.200 You have anymore? 1255 00:57:13.234 --> 00:57:14.969 No. 1256 00:57:15.002 --> 00:57:16.079 - No, there's... - That's it. 1257 00:57:16.103 --> 00:57:17.772 There's no more hummus, dad. 1258 00:57:17.805 --> 00:57:21.242 So when, when is the baby coming? 1259 00:57:21.275 --> 00:57:24.512 It's in, it's in four weeks, three and a half. 1260 00:57:24.545 --> 00:57:26.814 Ah, right, right. 1261 00:57:26.847 --> 00:57:28.716 Final countdown, as they said. 1262 00:57:28.749 --> 00:57:31.752 - Yeah. - Yeah. 1263 00:57:31.786 --> 00:57:35.156 So, we, we have realized that 1264 00:57:35.189 --> 00:57:38.025 the thing 1265 00:57:38.059 --> 00:57:40.861 that set all this off 1266 00:57:40.895 --> 00:57:42.630 was about being parents 1267 00:57:42.663 --> 00:57:46.067 and how we feel we've been parented. 1268 00:57:46.100 --> 00:57:50.771 - And, and, some of the... - And... 1269 00:57:50.805 --> 00:57:55.009 issues we might hold onto, 1270 00:57:55.042 --> 00:57:59.213 which have something to do with, um... 1271 00:57:59.246 --> 00:58:01.282 - You. - Stuff, stuff... you. 1272 00:58:01.315 --> 00:58:04.151 I can't take my eyes off your eye. 1273 00:58:04.185 --> 00:58:05.152 It's okay, it's okay. 1274 00:58:05.186 --> 00:58:07.254 - I'm okay. - Don't you want an ice pack 1275 00:58:07.288 --> 00:58:08.089 - or something? - I'm okay. 1276 00:58:08.122 --> 00:58:10.057 - I'm just so concerned. - Okay, guys. 1277 00:58:10.091 --> 00:58:11.959 There are lots of good things. 1278 00:58:11.993 --> 00:58:14.295 It can hemorrhage, you can get a hemorrhage 1279 00:58:14.328 --> 00:58:15.772 - in your eye and a blood clot. - He's not gonna get, 1280 00:58:15.796 --> 00:58:17.040 he's not gonna get a hemorrhage. 1281 00:58:17.064 --> 00:58:18.933 - My eye is fine. - We do need to, you know, 1282 00:58:18.966 --> 00:58:21.902 I just... what did you wanna say? 1283 00:58:21.936 --> 00:58:24.805 We just need to be 1284 00:58:24.839 --> 00:58:28.142 - honest. - Okay, honest, go. 1285 00:58:28.175 --> 00:58:31.579 So you have your hand on your cheek? 1286 00:58:31.612 --> 00:58:33.047 Yeah. 1287 00:58:33.080 --> 00:58:35.192 - Um, do you wanna? Or, should I? - I can take it off. 1288 00:58:35.216 --> 00:58:36.884 Should I? 1289 00:58:36.917 --> 00:58:38.619 - Should I? Okay. - Okay. 1290 00:58:38.652 --> 00:58:41.555 Okay, dad, I'm afraid of you. 1291 00:58:44.191 --> 00:58:47.128 Right now? 1292 00:58:47.161 --> 00:58:49.697 Um, always. 1293 00:58:49.730 --> 00:58:51.599 Always, I always have been. 1294 00:58:51.632 --> 00:58:54.802 Your, um, anger, um, 1295 00:58:54.835 --> 00:58:56.146 well, it scared me when I was a kid 1296 00:58:56.170 --> 00:58:58.672 'cause I was much smaller than you. 1297 00:58:58.706 --> 00:59:03.110 And, um, and it scares me now 1298 00:59:03.144 --> 00:59:08.082 because I don't wanna be that way with our daughter 1299 00:59:08.115 --> 00:59:09.884 when she's born. 1300 00:59:09.917 --> 00:59:14.288 Well, get rid of that so you don't pass it on to 1301 00:59:14.321 --> 00:59:16.157 your whippersnapper there. 1302 00:59:16.190 --> 00:59:19.593 Well, yeah, that's, that's what I'm trying to do. 1303 00:59:19.627 --> 00:59:20.961 - Um... - But, honey, 1304 00:59:20.995 --> 00:59:23.264 we've dealt with all that stuff. 1305 00:59:23.297 --> 00:59:28.035 Okay, but actually, we haven't dealt with it at all. 1306 00:59:28.069 --> 00:59:30.738 Do you, do you remember 1307 00:59:30.771 --> 00:59:32.907 what he's talking about? 1308 00:59:32.940 --> 00:59:35.376 Mm, not specifically, but... 1309 00:59:35.409 --> 00:59:37.278 Do you remember all the times when you would 1310 00:59:37.311 --> 00:59:39.613 pinch me, or you'd spank me, 1311 00:59:39.647 --> 00:59:42.683 or you'd cock a fist back like you were gonna hit me? 1312 00:59:42.716 --> 00:59:44.618 - Do you remember that? No? - Mm-mm. 1313 00:59:44.652 --> 00:59:46.187 - No. - He never punched you 1314 00:59:46.220 --> 00:59:49.056 - with his fist. - You seriously don't remember? 1315 00:59:49.090 --> 00:59:51.992 I don't remember a lot of things. 1316 00:59:52.026 --> 00:59:54.728 - Really? - Really. 1317 00:59:54.762 --> 00:59:56.297 - Really? - Really. 1318 00:59:56.330 --> 00:59:58.032 - Really? - Really! 1319 00:59:58.065 --> 00:59:59.342 It's gotta be in there somewhere. 1320 00:59:59.366 --> 01:00:02.169 - Well, I don't remember... - You're choosing 1321 01:00:02.203 --> 01:00:03.237 to not remember. 1322 01:00:03.270 --> 01:00:07.041 - You almost drowned him. - Huh? 1323 01:00:07.074 --> 01:00:08.642 - Nothing. - What do you wanna say? 1324 01:00:08.676 --> 01:00:09.677 No, no, no, no, no, no. 1325 01:00:09.710 --> 01:00:12.179 Oh, in the pool, when you got pissed off at me 1326 01:00:12.213 --> 01:00:14.682 because you thought I should be able to swim, 1327 01:00:14.715 --> 01:00:17.151 and I couldn't swim, and I was scared of the water, 1328 01:00:17.184 --> 01:00:18.228 and you told me to figure it out, 1329 01:00:18.252 --> 01:00:21.188 and you turned around and you went back inside? 1330 01:00:21.222 --> 01:00:23.224 And you swam. 1331 01:00:23.257 --> 01:00:25.025 - Well... - Could you not laugh? 1332 01:00:25.059 --> 01:00:27.761 Please don't laugh about it, Richard. 1333 01:00:27.795 --> 01:00:28.796 Mom came out, 1334 01:00:28.829 --> 01:00:31.098 and she had to jump in the pool 1335 01:00:31.132 --> 01:00:33.067 with all her clothes on and pull me out. 1336 01:00:33.100 --> 01:00:34.068 - Exactly! - I didn't actually 1337 01:00:34.101 --> 01:00:36.904 magically learn to swim. 1338 01:00:36.937 --> 01:00:39.073 She's a better swimmer than I am. 1339 01:00:41.442 --> 01:00:45.346 Okay, dad, do you remember, 1340 01:00:45.379 --> 01:00:48.082 do you remember the time in church 1341 01:00:48.115 --> 01:00:51.285 where I was six, and you kept telling me 1342 01:00:51.318 --> 01:00:52.786 to tuck my shirt in, 1343 01:00:52.820 --> 01:00:54.088 and my shirt wouldn't stay in 1344 01:00:54.121 --> 01:00:55.956 because it was a little too short? 1345 01:00:55.990 --> 01:00:58.092 And you pulled me over to the side, 1346 01:00:58.125 --> 01:00:59.793 and in front of everybody, 1347 01:00:59.827 --> 01:01:01.228 you pulled my pants down, 1348 01:01:01.262 --> 01:01:02.463 and pulled my shirt down, 1349 01:01:02.496 --> 01:01:06.901 and then you pulled my pants, like, almost up to my chest? 1350 01:01:06.934 --> 01:01:07.801 Do you remember that? 1351 01:01:07.835 --> 01:01:10.304 Yeah, did we get your shirt tucked in? 1352 01:01:16.744 --> 01:01:18.913 - I'm just gonna run and get... - Mom? 1353 01:01:18.946 --> 01:01:21.015 Mom, mom, mom, stop, please? 1354 01:01:21.048 --> 01:01:22.983 Please put that down. 1355 01:01:23.017 --> 01:01:24.084 Please put that down. 1356 01:01:24.118 --> 01:01:25.162 You're just tryin' to clean up 1357 01:01:25.186 --> 01:01:26.396 because you're conflict avoidant, 1358 01:01:26.420 --> 01:01:28.155 and that's always been your issue, 1359 01:01:28.189 --> 01:01:29.790 and it's crippled you as a human being. 1360 01:01:29.823 --> 01:01:31.859 Conflict avoidant? Well, I don't know about that. 1361 01:01:31.892 --> 01:01:35.262 Please stop, please stop! 1362 01:01:35.296 --> 01:01:38.032 I think you need to calm down, 1363 01:01:38.065 --> 01:01:39.333 buster. 1364 01:01:39.366 --> 01:01:41.769 - We're calm! - We're, 1365 01:01:41.802 --> 01:01:43.971 we are in a safe space. 1366 01:01:44.004 --> 01:01:46.173 - This is a safe space. - This is a safe space 1367 01:01:46.207 --> 01:01:49.109 - for us to just... - This is not a safe place. 1368 01:01:49.143 --> 01:01:51.011 This is a safe space 1369 01:01:51.045 --> 01:01:53.223 - to talk about what's really... - This is the most unsafe place 1370 01:01:53.247 --> 01:01:55.382 I've ever been in my whole life. 1371 01:01:55.416 --> 01:01:57.451 There is nothing safe about this! 1372 01:01:57.484 --> 01:01:59.186 This is a safe space! 1373 01:01:59.220 --> 01:02:00.955 What does that mean, a safe space? 1374 01:02:00.988 --> 01:02:02.122 It's not a safe place. 1375 01:02:02.156 --> 01:02:04.258 There's no such thing as a safe place! 1376 01:02:04.291 --> 01:02:06.269 - What is a safe place? - This is a family safe place 1377 01:02:06.293 --> 01:02:08.762 to just say everything you gotta say! 1378 01:02:08.796 --> 01:02:11.031 Dad, I think you're petrified. 1379 01:02:11.065 --> 01:02:12.900 I think you're fucking petrified, 1380 01:02:12.933 --> 01:02:14.835 and I just wanna create a safe space 1381 01:02:14.868 --> 01:02:16.046 to talk about why you're scared. 1382 01:02:16.070 --> 01:02:20.908 I'm just frightened to death, so how we gonna help me? 1383 01:02:20.941 --> 01:02:23.010 - What happened to you? - When? 1384 01:02:23.043 --> 01:02:25.012 When you were a kid? 1385 01:02:25.045 --> 01:02:27.948 I got the shit beat outta me. 1386 01:02:31.118 --> 01:02:32.820 I got hit with a fist, 1387 01:02:32.853 --> 01:02:34.421 I got hit with a belt, 1388 01:02:34.455 --> 01:02:36.223 I got hit with a stick. 1389 01:02:36.257 --> 01:02:40.995 I got hit with whatever was available. 1390 01:02:41.028 --> 01:02:43.931 You don't know real fear 1391 01:02:43.964 --> 01:02:47.101 until you met my dad when he was younger. 1392 01:02:49.136 --> 01:02:52.239 He'd come home from a trip, and I don't know where 1393 01:02:52.273 --> 01:02:53.907 the rage was coming from, 1394 01:02:53.941 --> 01:02:58.812 but this guy came like a fucking lion 1395 01:02:58.846 --> 01:03:01.181 out of nowhere! 1396 01:03:01.215 --> 01:03:03.817 And he would beat the shit out of me, 1397 01:03:03.851 --> 01:03:08.222 and then he'd leave again for three days. 1398 01:03:08.255 --> 01:03:11.892 All I knew about being a parent is 1399 01:03:11.925 --> 01:03:14.128 how he parented me. 1400 01:03:16.463 --> 01:03:19.199 What else is there? 1401 01:03:24.171 --> 01:03:26.473 Well, I, I, I gotta go. 1402 01:03:26.508 --> 01:03:27.975 Dad, no you don't. 1403 01:03:28.008 --> 01:03:30.844 Well, I gotta go soon. 1404 01:03:30.878 --> 01:03:32.146 Real soon. 1405 01:03:32.179 --> 01:03:34.114 I know we haven't, 1406 01:03:34.148 --> 01:03:35.158 I haven't talked to you yet, 1407 01:03:35.182 --> 01:03:39.053 but I do, I do need you to stay 1408 01:03:39.086 --> 01:03:40.321 because... 1409 01:03:40.354 --> 01:03:42.156 I don't wanna talk about that other thing. 1410 01:03:42.189 --> 01:03:44.992 Well, we are going to talk about it 1411 01:03:45.025 --> 01:03:47.394 because this is an open forum. 1412 01:03:47.428 --> 01:03:49.531 It's open forum day. 1413 01:03:49.564 --> 01:03:53.200 And the whole reason that I got 1414 01:03:53.233 --> 01:03:56.970 sent up on this quest 1415 01:03:57.004 --> 01:04:00.240 was because of your text. 1416 01:04:00.274 --> 01:04:02.309 What text? 1417 01:04:02.343 --> 01:04:04.546 Where you asked us to pay your rent? 1418 01:04:04.579 --> 01:04:05.579 Mm. 1419 01:04:08.282 --> 01:04:11.653 That's why we're here? 1420 01:04:11.686 --> 01:04:15.089 I'm, I'm sorry I, 1421 01:04:15.122 --> 01:04:16.591 I got backed up. 1422 01:04:16.624 --> 01:04:18.425 I got behind. 1423 01:04:18.459 --> 01:04:19.993 I got behind, 1424 01:04:20.027 --> 01:04:22.963 and that's what family's for. 1425 01:04:22.996 --> 01:04:24.932 Family's there to help each other. 1426 01:04:24.965 --> 01:04:27.234 I helped you when you were a little baby. 1427 01:04:27.267 --> 01:04:29.370 Dad, the... 1428 01:04:29.403 --> 01:04:31.338 Can we talk about the pills? 1429 01:04:31.372 --> 01:04:33.374 And the relapse? 1430 01:04:33.407 --> 01:04:35.643 And the fact that this is the fourth time 1431 01:04:35.677 --> 01:04:37.211 in the last two years 1432 01:04:37.244 --> 01:04:39.647 that you've hit us up for money? 1433 01:04:39.681 --> 01:04:42.650 I'm not a drug addict. 1434 01:04:42.684 --> 01:04:46.220 I have a pain problem 1435 01:04:46.253 --> 01:04:47.354 with my back. 1436 01:04:47.388 --> 01:04:49.591 Had an accident many years ago, 1437 01:04:49.624 --> 01:04:52.292 and sometimes it's hard to maintain 1438 01:04:52.326 --> 01:04:55.963 the right, you know, balance. 1439 01:04:55.996 --> 01:04:57.030 But, dad... 1440 01:04:57.064 --> 01:05:00.134 I needed the money 'cause I needed the money! 1441 01:05:00.167 --> 01:05:02.403 And I don't appreciate you bringing it up. 1442 01:05:02.436 --> 01:05:06.373 - How many pills are you taking? - I take it as prescribed. 1443 01:05:06.407 --> 01:05:08.475 What is prescribed? 1444 01:05:08.510 --> 01:05:12.146 I don't know. 1445 01:05:12.179 --> 01:05:14.047 I'm sorry, just kill me, okay? 1446 01:05:14.081 --> 01:05:14.948 Just fucking kill me? 1447 01:05:14.982 --> 01:05:17.050 Why don't I just fucking kill myself? 1448 01:05:17.084 --> 01:05:18.529 Then it'd be over, then you wouldn't have to... you could 1449 01:05:18.553 --> 01:05:20.254 - raise your kid by yourself. - Whoa! 1450 01:05:20.287 --> 01:05:22.022 - Okay, Bob... - I don't give a fuck! 1451 01:05:22.055 --> 01:05:22.956 - Dad! - Do you understand how 1452 01:05:22.990 --> 01:05:23.991 narcissistic you're being 1453 01:05:24.024 --> 01:05:25.560 - right now? - Narcissistic. 1454 01:05:25.593 --> 01:05:27.629 - Fuck you! - Yeah! 1455 01:05:27.662 --> 01:05:30.197 Yeah, I mean, we drive down here 1456 01:05:30.230 --> 01:05:32.399 five hours to come here, 1457 01:05:32.433 --> 01:05:33.701 and take you out, 1458 01:05:33.735 --> 01:05:36.336 and have a great time to celebrate 1459 01:05:36.370 --> 01:05:38.405 the birth of our grandkid, 1460 01:05:38.439 --> 01:05:41.709 and you, you wanna have an inquisition with us 1461 01:05:41.743 --> 01:05:44.746 about the parents that we were 1462 01:05:44.779 --> 01:05:46.581 years and years ago, 1463 01:05:46.614 --> 01:05:48.282 when we didn't know any better? 1464 01:05:48.315 --> 01:05:50.217 We didn't have these parenting classes, 1465 01:05:50.250 --> 01:05:54.522 this rie, rie parenting classes, whatever the heck 1466 01:05:54.556 --> 01:05:55.599 it was you went to... You don't understand 1467 01:05:55.623 --> 01:05:58.025 - how different it was. - I was out on the streets 1468 01:05:58.058 --> 01:05:58.992 when I was a kid. 1469 01:05:59.026 --> 01:06:01.361 I was sellin' papers on a paper corner, 1470 01:06:01.395 --> 01:06:05.365 on a corner when I was nine years old. 1471 01:06:05.399 --> 01:06:07.569 - It's different! - It's real different. 1472 01:06:07.602 --> 01:06:09.236 I had to walk to school, 1473 01:06:09.269 --> 01:06:12.005 miles, when I was seven years old! 1474 01:06:12.039 --> 01:06:12.874 They would just put me out. 1475 01:06:12.907 --> 01:06:14.284 I mean, anything could have happened, 1476 01:06:14.308 --> 01:06:15.375 and bad things did happen! 1477 01:06:15.409 --> 01:06:18.680 Yeah, you can't teach somebody to climb a tree. 1478 01:06:18.713 --> 01:06:22.282 I fell out of a tree! 1479 01:06:22.316 --> 01:06:24.619 That's right, you gotta learn to climb the tree. 1480 01:06:24.652 --> 01:06:26.487 Cut my ear, I still have a scar. 1481 01:06:26.521 --> 01:06:28.231 Oh, I'll tell you another thing that happened. 1482 01:06:28.255 --> 01:06:30.692 They would give me a dog, my mother would give me a dog. 1483 01:06:30.725 --> 01:06:33.203 I'd fall in love with the dog, I'd have the dog for six months, 1484 01:06:33.227 --> 01:06:35.797 then daddy would come home, and give the dog away! 1485 01:06:35.830 --> 01:06:38.600 On Christmas Eve, once, I had a dog named stray. 1486 01:06:38.633 --> 01:06:40.200 They gave the dog away on Christmas Eve, 1487 01:06:40.234 --> 01:06:41.636 and my mother said, "oh, 1488 01:06:41.669 --> 01:06:43.738 it's a good time to give the dog to the pound 1489 01:06:43.771 --> 01:06:46.106 because on Christmas, people will be goin' to get 1490 01:06:46.139 --> 01:06:47.407 dogs for their children." 1491 01:06:47.441 --> 01:06:49.553 You wonder why I didn't want you to have a dog growin' up? 1492 01:06:49.577 --> 01:06:52.145 - I couldn't bear it! - It's a different world 1493 01:06:52.179 --> 01:06:53.615 that you're living in 1494 01:06:53.648 --> 01:06:56.450 from the world we lived in and grew up in. 1495 01:06:56.483 --> 01:06:59.621 And you really don't know what it was like. 1496 01:06:59.654 --> 01:07:01.523 And feelings, I mean, it's a luxury, 1497 01:07:01.556 --> 01:07:03.257 it's a privilege to have feelings, 1498 01:07:03.290 --> 01:07:04.467 to be able to discuss feelings. 1499 01:07:04.491 --> 01:07:08.228 If I would have stopped to talk to my dad about feelings, 1500 01:07:08.262 --> 01:07:09.764 he woulda knocked me for a loop! 1501 01:07:09.797 --> 01:07:11.533 I didn't even know I had feelings. 1502 01:07:11.566 --> 01:07:15.068 - What are feelings, man? - Feelings. 1503 01:07:15.102 --> 01:07:17.271 Good luck! 1504 01:07:17.304 --> 01:07:19.206 Is that what you want, is you want, you want, 1505 01:07:19.239 --> 01:07:22.442 you guys want, you want an apology? 1506 01:07:22.476 --> 01:07:24.278 I'll apologize to you. 1507 01:07:24.311 --> 01:07:27.347 I'll look right into your eyes right now, 1508 01:07:27.381 --> 01:07:29.551 and I am so sorry 1509 01:07:29.584 --> 01:07:31.786 for all the times that I ever hurt you, 1510 01:07:31.819 --> 01:07:34.321 and all the times that I ever 1511 01:07:34.354 --> 01:07:36.089 made you upset, 1512 01:07:36.123 --> 01:07:37.157 and all the times... 1513 01:07:37.190 --> 01:07:38.660 I'll apologize for him too. 1514 01:07:38.693 --> 01:07:39.561 I hated it when he 1515 01:07:39.594 --> 01:07:41.461 - threatened you. - Is that what you want? 1516 01:07:41.495 --> 01:07:43.263 For us to tell you we're sorry? 1517 01:07:43.297 --> 01:07:45.867 - Tell him! Apologize to him. - I mean, okay, I'm sorry 1518 01:07:45.900 --> 01:07:47.267 if I hurt you. 1519 01:07:47.301 --> 01:07:48.068 I'm sorry. 1520 01:07:48.101 --> 01:07:49.771 But say it, say it like you mean it. 1521 01:07:49.804 --> 01:07:52.707 I am sorry if I hurt you. 1522 01:07:56.744 --> 01:07:58.846 See? 1523 01:07:58.880 --> 01:08:01.716 He is sorry. 1524 01:08:01.749 --> 01:08:03.450 This is a good man, 1525 01:08:03.483 --> 01:08:05.385 and he loves you. 1526 01:08:09.389 --> 01:08:10.825 You doin' okay, dad? 1527 01:08:15.462 --> 01:08:16.831 I'm sorry. 1528 01:08:18.465 --> 01:08:22.302 Dad, dad, look at me. 1529 01:08:22.336 --> 01:08:25.138 How many pills are you at? 1530 01:08:25.172 --> 01:08:26.507 How many? 1531 01:08:30.612 --> 01:08:33.881 I don't know! 1532 01:08:33.915 --> 01:08:35.550 I don't know. 1533 01:08:35.583 --> 01:08:36.718 Dad. 1534 01:08:38.653 --> 01:08:40.755 I don't know! 1535 01:08:40.788 --> 01:08:44.191 I take 'em, I take 'em, I just, it doesn't... 1536 01:08:44.224 --> 01:08:46.393 I take 'em as needed! 1537 01:08:46.426 --> 01:08:48.428 And I need a lot. 1538 01:08:48.462 --> 01:08:50.565 I need a lot. 1539 01:08:55.202 --> 01:08:56.671 Will you go to rehab? 1540 01:09:04.512 --> 01:09:06.814 Okay. 1541 01:09:06.848 --> 01:09:08.816 Yeah? 1542 01:09:08.850 --> 01:09:11.451 Yeah. 1543 01:09:11.485 --> 01:09:14.354 I'll go to the meetings, I'll do whatever I can. 1544 01:09:14.388 --> 01:09:15.389 I'll do anything! 1545 01:09:15.422 --> 01:09:17.592 I'm gonna throw these freakin' pills away. 1546 01:09:17.625 --> 01:09:19.594 Here! Take 'em, 1547 01:09:19.627 --> 01:09:21.896 and flush 'em away. 1548 01:09:21.929 --> 01:09:24.364 This is it, this is day one... day zero. 1549 01:09:24.398 --> 01:09:26.868 Tomorrow's day one. 1550 01:09:26.901 --> 01:09:29.604 Dad. 1551 01:09:29.637 --> 01:09:32.239 If you mean it, 1552 01:09:32.272 --> 01:09:34.307 it would really mean a lot to me. 1553 01:09:37.545 --> 01:09:38.880 I mean it! 1554 01:09:41.549 --> 01:09:43.651 But I don't know. 1555 01:09:48.321 --> 01:09:50.390 But I wanna see your baby. 1556 01:09:56.363 --> 01:09:59.634 I'm excited for you to be a grandpa. 1557 01:10:02.570 --> 01:10:04.304 I don't wanna miss that! 1558 01:10:04.337 --> 01:10:07.374 I don't want you to miss that. 1559 01:10:07.407 --> 01:10:10.377 We don't want you guys to miss it. 1560 01:10:10.410 --> 01:10:12.279 That's why we wanted to 1561 01:10:12.312 --> 01:10:14.649 talk to you because it's important to us 1562 01:10:14.682 --> 01:10:17.852 that you're in our kid's life. 1563 01:10:42.844 --> 01:10:44.779 Oh, that's weird. 1564 01:10:44.812 --> 01:10:46.313 Ooh! 1565 01:10:49.517 --> 01:10:52.019 Oh, my god, I have to go to the bathroom. 1566 01:10:52.053 --> 01:10:53.654 You okay? 1567 01:10:53.688 --> 01:10:55.757 Ooh, I gotta go. 1568 01:10:55.790 --> 01:10:58.025 Uh, okay. 1569 01:11:00.360 --> 01:11:02.029 I'll be right back. 1570 01:11:49.877 --> 01:11:51.846 Uh, honey? 1571 01:11:51.879 --> 01:11:53.346 Can you come up here? 1572 01:11:53.380 --> 01:11:54.849 I'll be right back. 1573 01:11:59.120 --> 01:12:01.055 Wow. 1574 01:12:01.088 --> 01:12:03.658 What the fuck was that? 1575 01:12:03.691 --> 01:12:05.293 I don't know. 1576 01:12:08.696 --> 01:12:10.463 - Hey. - Hey. 1577 01:12:10.497 --> 01:12:12.834 You okay? 1578 01:12:12.867 --> 01:12:14.434 It's starting. 1579 01:12:14.467 --> 01:12:15.970 It's star... 1580 01:12:16.003 --> 01:12:19.472 Oh, like, it's starting right now? 1581 01:12:19.507 --> 01:12:22.844 Yeah, right now. 1582 01:12:22.877 --> 01:12:25.613 Okay. 1583 01:12:25.646 --> 01:12:26.948 Okay. 1584 01:12:29.617 --> 01:12:30.952 Awesome! 1585 01:12:33.087 --> 01:12:35.790 Awesome. 1586 01:12:38.860 --> 01:12:40.127 Oh! 1587 01:13:18.666 --> 01:13:19.567 Are you okay? 1588 01:13:19.600 --> 01:13:20.601 - No. - Are you okay? 1589 01:13:20.635 --> 01:13:23.638 I'm really stressed, and I'm really tired. 1590 01:13:23.671 --> 01:13:24.739 Oh, okay. 1591 01:13:24.772 --> 01:13:25.873 My white blood cell count 1592 01:13:25.907 --> 01:13:27.217 - is not doing well. - No, I know. 1593 01:13:27.241 --> 01:13:28.408 You need to not stress out. 1594 01:13:28.441 --> 01:13:31.112 - I can't be stressed out! - You need to not stress out. 1595 01:13:31.145 --> 01:13:32.947 I know I need to not stress out! 1596 01:13:32.980 --> 01:13:36.717 - Just, so just calm down! - So I know, so you... 1597 01:13:41.923 --> 01:13:44.659 Okay, let's try it again. 1598 01:14:03.210 --> 01:14:05.579 Wait a second, 'cause we can figure this out mathematically. 1599 01:14:05.613 --> 01:14:08.883 - Let's go that way. - The city lights are there. 1600 01:14:08.916 --> 01:14:10.851 The moon is there. 1601 01:14:10.885 --> 01:14:12.887 Do you remember where our car was 1602 01:14:12.920 --> 01:14:14.588 in relation to the moon? 1603 01:14:17.992 --> 01:14:20.795 Do you remember where our car was... 1604 01:14:20.828 --> 01:14:22.663 I peed my pants. 1605 01:14:26.000 --> 01:14:27.868 Hey, stop. 1606 01:14:40.648 --> 01:14:42.283 Eighty-eight, eighty-nine, 1607 01:14:42.316 --> 01:14:44.785 ninety, ninety-one, ninety-two, 1608 01:14:44.819 --> 01:14:47.288 ninety-three, ninety-four, ninety-five, 1609 01:14:47.321 --> 01:14:49.056 ninety-six, ninety-seven, 1610 01:14:49.090 --> 01:14:50.992 ninety-eight, ninety-nine. 1611 01:15:25.760 --> 01:15:26.861 That's good, hold up. 1612 01:15:26.894 --> 01:15:28.295 Hold on, just like that. 1613 01:15:28.329 --> 01:15:30.564 - Hold on just like... - Don't take a picture! 1614 01:15:30.598 --> 01:15:31.432 We don't need a picture, 1615 01:15:31.465 --> 01:15:32.876 - this is for us! - Let me take a picture! 1616 01:15:32.900 --> 01:15:34.201 No, that goes to the cloud. 1617 01:15:34.235 --> 01:15:35.312 I'm about to let you fuck me. 1618 01:15:35.336 --> 01:15:37.671 - Let me take a picture. - Yeah, this is different. 1619 01:15:37.705 --> 01:15:38.572 It's not on the cloud. 1620 01:15:38.606 --> 01:15:40.775 - You swear your phone? - I swear to god 1621 01:15:40.808 --> 01:15:41.709 it's not on the cloud. 1622 01:15:41.742 --> 01:15:44.912 'Cause this is not for social media.