(soothing music)
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(birds chirping)
- [Officiant] Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today
to join this man and this woman in holy matrimony.
Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast.
It is not proud, it is not rude.
It is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered.
It keeps no record of wrongs.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes,
and always preserves.
- I love you.
- I love you too.
- By the powers vested in me by this church,
I now pronounce you husband and wife.
You may kiss your bride.
(people applauding)
- The other day, I went shopping with my wife.
Now some men loathe this, because when your wife
asks your opinion, you must tread lightly
or you will find yourself sleeping on the couch.
But when I go shopping with my wife,
I get to notice people.
I get to look at what they do, and how they act.
And when we look at another human being, we do one thing.
We judge them.
We judge their appearance, eating habits,
what they drive, how many kids they have.
We make an assumption without even saying a word.
I will admit that I am guilty of this myself, sometimes,
though I try not to be.
Matthew 7:1-2.
"Do not judge or you will be judged,
"for in the same way you judged others
"you will be judged.
"And with the same measure you use
"it will be measured to you."
And that's pretty simple and direct.
But why are we so quick to judge others
when some of us can't keep our own lives together?
This week I challenge you
to not judge,
but instead to remember what I've just reminded you of.
God is always watching, always.
Hi there.
- Pastor. - Oh it's okay, thank you.
Something wrong, honey?
- I'm so sorry, Thomas.
- Sorry for what?
- I took three pregnancy tests this morning,
and they call came back negative.
- It's okay.
- It's not okay!
We're trying to start a family together
and I can't even give us that.
- It's just not the right time.
- I am so sick of hearing that,
and I'm just so sick of the disappointment,
and the heartache.
- I,
I'm not even gonna try to understand
what you're going through.
All I can do is be here for you, and comfort you.
- What if I can't have a baby, Thomas?
- Then we'll cross that bridge when we get to it,
and if that bridge collapses, we'll build another one.
(emotional music)
Ariana?
Ariana.
How is she?
- Has your wife been suffering from headaches
in the last few days?
- No sir.
She's been fine.
- Your wife has suffered a ruptured aneurysm,
and the severity of it has placed her in a coma.
- A coma?
What's the timeline on something like this?
- It's hard to say.
I've seen cases where they stay in a coma
three to six weeks,
or worse cases, 12 or more.
Your wife seems to be strong,
and I think we'll go with the lesser amount.
(gentle piano music)
- I'm here, honey.
I'm right here.
Please God, please watch over her.
(emotional music)
- Ariana Mitchell?
- Who are you?
- You can just call me the Carpenter.
- Why am I here?
How do you know my name?
- I've known your name for a long time.
- Where's my husband?
I wanna see my husband.
- Your husband is fine.
- What am I doing here?
- Tell me something,
what is the last thing that you remember?
- I was in the kitchen, and I got dizzy.
I fell to the ground, and that's the last thing I remember.
Just tell me what's going on, please!
- Well at this point, you should already know what this is.
- You know everything about me.
My past, my present, and now my future?
- Yes, I do.
And as you stand here in front of me, I ask you,
how do you view your life?
How did you view your life?
- I don't understand.
(man clapping)
- Some things just never change.
- You would know.
- Ariana Mitchell, it's a pleasure to meet you.
- Who are you?
- You can just call me the Thief.
- You have no place here.
- I'm just getting acquainted with Miss Mitchell.
Besides, you're playing question and answer
with this poor woman,
and you still haven't answered her simple question.
- [Carpenter] I've answered everything
that needed to be answered.
- I will be seeing you soon.
(Thief humming "Amazing Grace")
- Why am I here?
- Follow me.
This is where things changed in your life.
Everything was as it should be, until this moment.
- If you know that, then why are you making me relive it?
- Sometimes we don't see things
for what they are with a first look.
Just watch, and see how bad things can happen
to your heart in an instant.
- This was the day my father left us.
I was never the same after this.
- Tomorrow holds the strength to be better than yesterday.
- I'll come get the rest of my things
when Ariana's at school and you're at work.
- So that's it?
No chance to try to work it out?
- Geez Wendy, I told you, it's completely over.
I don't want to work things out.
- We don't deserve this.
You have a little girl that needs her father!
You have the balls to leave us,
but they aren't big enough to look me in the eye.
- What do you want me to say to you?
I'm tired of living this life.
I'm tired of routine, I'm tired of church.
I've done things the Christian way for years,
and it's got me nothing!
- Is that what you think?
- You know what I mean.
- No, I don't!
I know that this life we live is hard,
but who said life was easy?
We do our best, and make it work.
God will do the rest if we remain faithful to him!
- And there you go again.
You throw God into everything.
If there's one thing I've done,
it's waste my time praying for a better life.
Well, I found someone.
I found someone who wants to live life to the fullest.
- You have a great life now.
You just choose to throw it away for one moment of lust.
If you told me right now that you will stay to work it out,
then I will forgive you,
no matter how hard it will be
to look at you and tolerate you,
I would still forgive you and work on getting it right.
But if you walk out that door, it's over.
Forgiveness isn't an option after that.
- Please don't leave us, Daddy.
Please stay with us.
- Don't be sad, sweetheart.
It's gonna be okay.
- Will God take care of us since Daddy won't?
- Yes baby, he will.
- Then don't be sad, Mommy.
- As a child, your faith was so strong.
- No child should live the life that I've had to.
- You think your life is worse than others?
- At times, yes.
I had to shut everyone off from school, church.
The outside world, it was a dark place,
but my heart was even darker.
- Are you okay, Mama?
- I'm okay, sweetheart.
You go on to sleep.
- You can stay in here with me
so you don't have to sleep alone.
- You have a big heart, Ariana, do you know that?
- I get it from you.
I wanna be just like you when I get older.
- I want you to be your own person.
You should never be what someone else wants you to be.
- Can I ask you something?
- You can always ask me anything.
- How do you feel since Dad's gone?
- Right now, I feel angry and hurt.
Your father has fallen in love, or thinks that he has,
with someone else.
- Does he still love me?
- I wanna tell you yes honey, but.
- But what?
- Love is a very strong word.
When you love someone, you wanna be there for that person
through the toughest of times,
because love can get you through life in the worst of times.
- God's love for us will get us through this.
You love me, and God loves me.
That's all I need and could ever ask for.
- I pray that you keep the heart you have, Ariana.
This world needs it.
- You know your mother never stopped praying for you.
- Then why didn't you answer her prayers then?
- What makes you think that I didn't?
- If you did, I didn't notice.
- Ariana, selfish prayers
are the ones that we do in despair.
Now your mother, she prayed for you
during her darkest of times,
the happiest of times.
She prayed for you before she even did herself.
Just because your prayers weren't answered
when you wanted, or needed 'em to be,
doesn't mean that they weren't answered.
- Well there she is, hardest working RN in the building.
- Now, we know your life would be boring without me here.
Has it been a busy night?
- I wish it had been busy.
We've only had one case come in, a brain aneurysm.
A young lady, too, about your age.
- Oh no, that's awful.
- It really is a shame.
Husband's good-lookin', too.
Tall, dark, and handsome.
- [Lisa] Yeah?
What's the patient's name?
- It's a unique name.
Let's see.
Mitchell, Ariana Mitchell.
(somber music)
- [Lisa] Thomas.
- [Thomas] Hey.
- I'm sorry. - Thank you.
I didn't know you were back in town.
- I've been back for a few months.
Brian's still in Honduras.
We wanted to get moved back and settled in.
I meant to call.
- You don't have to explain anything.
She was just as stubborn about calling you.
- This is a moment when you stand here,
and you think to yourself
that you should've written that letter.
You should've made that call, before it was too late.
- There was no way you could've known this was gonna happen.
- I feel so much remorse.
(emotional music)
- What are we doing here?
- At one point in time, this was like a second home to you.
- Yes, it was.
But my mother needed me to be there for her.
- I don't know what to do next.
How am I gonna support my daughter?
She's all that matters now.
- Your mother knew that times would get hard,
but at any moment, she would pray for help.
She never lost her faith.
- You don't have to remind me about prayer.
I pray every day.
- Yes, yes you do.
I know what you pray for.
How do you pray?
Do you pray with faith, or fear?
- I've never been one to ask for anything, Lord,
but now I ask that you watch over me and my daughter.
I ask that you open your arms and take hold of us.
I'm so scared, but I know that you'll always provide,
and never forsake us.
- I'm not my mother.
I never will be.
- Ariana?
You have no idea of what you're capable of.
- Tell me what you want to hear.
Just tell me what I need to do so I can see my husband.
- This young lady's made a request.
So why is it so hard for you to grant that?
- Things aren't as easy as they seem.
- Things are easy, but your words,
they complicate things.
- Mind your tongue.
- And this garbage of prayer,
he only wants you to do wrong so that you repent your sins.
All the while, he's driving that nail
through his hand the next day.
- We aren't perfect.
- You're not perfect.
You're flawed, and flawed's okay.
He gave you choice, but had he not given you choice,
you would live the perfect life.
- No one's life is perfect.
- Your lies won't stray her away from me.
- Words only say so much.
I'll show you a time when he didn't help you.
- You're not wanted here.
Leave me alone!
(somber music)
Is this my judgment?
- What do you think?
- Yes?
- You seem afraid.
- [Ariana] I'm not.
- [Carpenter] We will see.
(Lisa sniffles)
(Lisa sighs)
- It's been a long time
since we've seen or spoken to each other.
So many words should've been said between us,
and it wouldn't have taken
but a second to say I'm sorry.
I don't know if you're gonna make it through the night,
and I didn't want my last time seeing you to be like this.
I'm sorry for walkin' away from you that night.
I should've prayed harder, and.
(Lisa crying)
- She wanted to pick up that phone every night,
but she couldn't find the words.
- We're so stubborn.
I'll be back in a few minutes,
after I finish my other rounds.
(emotional music)
Excuse me, I'm sorry to bother you.
Could you tell me where Bromley Hall is?
- Oh yeah sure, just go this way, keep straight.
You know what, I'll just take you there myself,
'cause I have to meet my roommate there in a couple minutes.
- I don't want to keep you from studying.
- No, no, it's fine, I don't mind, really.
- [Lisa] Okay.
- My name's Ariana.
- I'm Lisa, it's nice to meet you.
- It's nice to meet you, too.
So, what brings you to this fine university?
- [Lisa] Are you being sarcastic, or serious?
- [Ariana] A little bit of both.
- Well, I'm transferring in from another college.
It just wasn't the right fit for me.
- So what's your major?
- Well, I'm looking into something in the medical field.
- Yeah?
- I really wanna do mission work overseas.
- Oh wow, that's a lot to take on.
I mean, it takes a special kind of person to do that.
- It really does, yeah.
So what about you?
What brings you to this fine university?
- Well, honestly I didn't have the best childhood.
My mom, she was a single mom
and she was just working day and night
so I could go into college, but I got scholarships
and now I'm looking into business.
- Nice, that's great. - Thanks.
- She must be so proud of you.
- She's definitely my biggest fan.
But look, here we are.
So, do you have your dorm room number?
I can tell you the good, and the bad.
- 23.
- Well, what do you know?
Nice to meet you, roomie.
- It's nice to meet you.
- [Ariana] That's awesome.
- I've seen that look a million times.
What's on your mind?
- I have four hours left on my shift.
Time just doesn't wait for anyone.
- Did you lose a patient, or is it something else?
- A friend.
She's in a coma, close friend.
- You know, when I decided to become a nurse
I had a general idea of what to expect.
The first time I saw a patient die,
it was different, very different
from losing a family member.
He was a 34 year old male who had a heart attack,
and we tried to revive him so many times,
but it just wasn't enough.
I couldn't sleep for days.
No matter how much we know, or how much we do,
the one thing we can't always do is save lives.
Sometimes God's plan just doesn't align with ours.
- That's the one thing I rely my faith on is His love.
- It doesn't get greater than that.
I'm sure your friend will be fine, no matter the outcome.
Would you let me pray with you?
- [Lisa] Yes ma'am.
I think that'd be a good idea.
- Our most gracious heavenly Father,
thank you so much for this beautiful person,
and for her friend, and God just please
be with her and her family.
(gentle music)
- I don't know why life got so complicated.
He always made everything so easy.
He kept everything so balanced,
and I can't even balance my own life.
I'm just so afraid right now,
and I know I shouldn't be.
I love you, Mom.
I know I told you that every time I saw you,
but it still wasn't enough.
- [Wendy] It was always enough, baby girl.
- Mom?
- I will say what needs to be said,
and then I must go.
- I don't understand.
- You will.
I'm so proud of you, and the woman and wife you've become.
You have lived your life like you're supposed to.
- Have I?
I'm here as if this were real, but I know that it's not.
- The one thing you always questioned was belief.
You still doubt so much.
- I just don't understand what's going on.
I need my husband, he's all I have left.
- Don't be afraid of this.
Don't even try to understand, just let it take its course.
- I'm so afraid.
I don't think I'm ready for this.
- Don't let fear keep you from your promise.
- I miss you so much.
- I miss you too.
Close your eyes.
(emotional music)
- I don't even know if you can hear me right now.
I'm not prepared for this.
Knowing that it's something that I can't fix
makes it 10 times worse.
You were always the better part of me
when it came to comfort.
I wish I could take your place,
but I know you'd be mad at me for even saying that.
Why?
I wanna cuss God so much, but I can't.
I won't.
- [David] It's always the easiest thing to do.
It's also the dumbest.
- Hey, Brother David.
- Hey.
I already know the answer to this question,
but I'm gonna ask anyway.
How are you holding up?
- It's a rhetorical question.
- Like I said, I had to ask.
- I know.
- So what can I do for you, Thomas?
I can always offer you words of comfort,
but I realize they only offer comfort for so long.
- Prayer is the only thing that's needed.
- Are you prepared for the worst?
- I have to be.
I may not understand it, but I have to accept it.
- You know, I've had so many stories that affected me.
Seen couples thrive, and I've seen couples drown.
They all had the stability of God in their lives,
but He wasn't center.
He was always last call, or need as needed.
When I look at you and Ariana,
it's given me so much hope.
There were so many times I wanted to throw in the towel.
But I've got a congregation that needs me,
and a family that needs me, and God needs me.
- Like everyone else,
you get tested too.
- It's very true.
You know when my wife died,
I asked all the questions and whys, and the hows.
Then I had to take a step back and remind myself
it was never my place to question the one who died for me.
- Why does anger manifest itself at times like this?
- Are you mad now?
- I was.
But not anymore.
- You know, when we have no one to blame,
that's when we got out and try to find someone to blame,
but sometimes there's just nothing to blame.
Sometimes that's just life, Thomas.
Take the good with the bad, live each day as best we can.
I know you and Ariana have been through so much together,
and no matter what happens,
things will be as they should be.
- Will you pray for us?
- I'd like to my friend, yes.
Our most dear and gracious heavenly Father,
we love thee and thank thee for every day of life.
- Don't move, Mom.
- What happened?
Where am I?
- You, you passed out on the couch
and they found a mass in your brain
and they had to remove it.
- Oh.
- I found you just lying there, not moving.
I was so scared.
It was like you were fine in an instant,
and then you were having a tumor removed.
- Life always has its unexpected surprises.
We have to deal with them as they come.
- Sometimes life sucks.
- Did you let Brother David know?
- I did.
He and Thomas came by.
They prayed over you after your surgery.
- Aren't I the popular one?
- How can you be so calm, even after all this?
- I have no other way to be.
I don't want you to think the worst,
but I want you to be prepared for it.
- Don't talk like that.
- You know I have to be realistic about this.
I was so afraid I would fail you as a single mother.
I remember crying myself to sleep every night
after tucking you in.
Every day was a struggle.
But looking at your innocence made all the fear go away.
- Stop it, don't talk like that.
- I will be all right.
You be happy, and live your life
the way you know you should live it.
Keep living, and be happy for me.
I love you so much.
I'm so proud of you.
- I love you too, Mom.
Mom?
Mom, Mom.
Mom.
(Ariana sobbing)
Thank you so much for doing this.
- Don't mention it.
I'm happy I could bring you a little comfort.
- It really does mean a lot to me.
- What will you do now?
- Well my mom, she had a will,
so I think I'll figure out the logistics of that
and move forward.
Probably just sell the house, and then move into the city.
There's nothing really here helping me heal, so.
I didn't mean it like that, Thomas.
- Hey, don't apologize.
Whatever helps you heal, I'm with you 100%.
- Thank you.
Means a lot to me.
So, what are you thinking right now in this moment?
- That I care for you more than I should.
- Really?
I know your faith's important to you, Thomas.
I don't wanna ever come in between that.
- I don't want you to have emotions that are sadness,
'cause you were happy when I met you.
- I'm happy here now, with you, standing here.
- [Thomas] And what about tomorrow?
- [Ariana] What about tomorrow?
(Lisa knocking)
- I'll see you later.
- [Lisa] I came as soon as I could.
- I called you.
The one person that I wanted, and you weren't there for me.
- I'm sorry!
I tried to call you too, but you didn't answer.
- Yeah, I was a little busy.
- Listen, I'm sorry I wasn't here when it happened,
but I'm here now.
- Yeah, you are, but it's a little too late for that.
- You don't mean that!
Listen, I know you have a lot of emotions right now,
but pushing me away is not gonna help.
- You know you're probably right,
but I think it's the best thing to do right now.
- Your mother wouldn't want you to be like this.
- Don't you dare say a word about my mother!
You weren't there when she took her last breath.
- I'm sorry!
- I want you to leave.
- You can't be serious.
- I'm very serious.
- I loved her too.
- Memories, they're such a wonderful thing.
- [Ariana] Leave me alone.
- What fun would that be?
And besides, it looks like you're having a lot of fun
enjoying those painful memories.
- They aren't painful, not all of them.
- You should never hide the truth when it's obvious.
- You seem to know a lot about me,
but I know about you as well.
- I'm an open book.
I'm the open book.
- Yes, you are.
Why are you here to torment me?
- 'Cause you stand here, living these memories,
and yet you question so many things.
Your God, your faith, your promised land.
So what's wrong with being so--
- Bad?
- Imperfect?
I have seen the flaws that men have,
and I make it known that it's fine to be imperfect.
- Are you honestly justifying malice?
- Life is about choice.
Right or wrong, a choice is a choice.
- Creation was a choice, decisions are a choice.
My Father created this path for me,
and I choose to follow Him.
- So you tell me you believe in something
that you don't see?
Something that you can't talk to
when there's so many things in this world
that give you comfort, that are visible?
- I find comfort in knowing they're in a better place
without any sin, any sorrow, any shame.
That is the most rewarding comfort to me.
You stand here reminding me of the worst of my past,
but should I remind you of your future?
- The faithful will always fall,
and I will be in the darkness waiting to put out the light.
(emotional music)
- [Doctor] Her brain activity seems to be decreasing,
so I think it's time you consider that it's time.
- [Thomas] Until she's taken her last breath,
and been called home,
I'm keeping my faith in God to heal her.
You've done your job, now God will do his.
- He loves you so much.
- This is the last time I'm gonna see him, isn't it?
- [Carpenter] You'll always be able to see him.
(gentle piano music)
- Thomas. - I know.
I just can't let her go yet.
Can, can I have a minute?
- Of course.
- Is this the end?
- Yes.
- Can I see him one last time
and tell him that I love him?
- It doesn't work that way.
In your life, you cherish these moments with him
that made him whole.
He honored my word.
He honored you.
- I wish I'd said more to you today.
I wish I'd prayed more with you today.
I wish I didn't have to say goodbye to you right now.
You were always the best part of me
that I didn't know I had,
and God has blessed me with these wonderful years with you,
and I'll never forget 'em.
- You always said the right things I needed to hear.
You showed me a love that I'll always remember.
I'm so sorry if let you down in any way.
'Cause you would've been the best father there ever was.
- Two are better than one,
because they have a good return for their labor.
If either one of them falls,
if either one of them falls down,
one can help the other up.
- Husbands love their wives,
just as Christ loved the church.
As He gave Himself up for her,
sanctifying her, cleansing her in the water,
and the washing of the word
so that he could present the church to Himself in splendor
without spot or wrinkle of any kind,
so that she would be holy and without blemish.
Husbands love their wives,
just as their own bodies.
For a man who loves his wife loves himself.
(emotional music)