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What reality garbage are you watching now?
"The Cleansing Hour".
You've never heard of "Father Lance"?!
Every week, an incredible deliverance!
Is that what they call special effects these days?
Here.
You're gonna like this.
I like "The Mindy Project".
Don't you want to witness divine intervention?
Are you seeing this?
It's nice we can choose the clothes together.
We're so lucky
not everybody can do that.
It'll be big on you, but I'd like you to wear
my father's suit.
What do you think?
I don't care.
I'll wear whatever.
No, you must look smart.
It's an important day for me.
Lots of people are coming, you must look perfect.
Then just choose my clothes for me.
I'm not in the mood.
Shoes?
The brown ones are nicer, right?
Those ones rub and give me sores.
I prefer the black ones.
These ones.
They're newer.
They're newer because I never wear them.
They rub.
Then put some plasters on.
Why ask me which shoes I want if you're going
to choose them yourself?
Which tie?
I like these two.
I don't like wearing a tie.
I never wear a tie.
It's not my style.
Style!
Style What's your style?
You look like a rustic.
I am a rustic and I like the way I look, okay?
Shave that beard off.
You're not going with that great beard.
You're not touching my great beard.
I was practically born with a beard.
You met me with this beard.
That beard is going and that's that.
Don't you dare I mean it, okay?
Darling.
That beard.
That beard it's disgusting.
It doesn't suit you.
It never has.
These clothes that we're choosing
you'll be wearing for eternity.
We don't have much time
so make an effort and help me with all of this.
You're the star.
Lots of people are coming
to see you one last time at your wake.
So I want you to look handsome and radiant.
They'll think that I've dressed you badly because
you're a simple villager.
But that's what I am.
That's how I want people to remember me.
With my shirts
with tracksuit bottoms
and, above all
with my beard.
Don't touch my beard, okay?
I have to get the flowers
the coffin and call the last guests.
The burial is in three days.
So don't be selfish.
Cooperate a little, please.
Darling
why don't you just wait until I die and you can do it
as you like.
Darling, I don't like to remind you but
the doctor said you have less than 48 hours left.
What if he's wrong?
He won't be wrong.
He looks so smart.
Are the clothes his?
Or are they from the funeral home?
It's my father's suit.
We chose it together for the occasion.
Rest assured, dear.
He's more handsome dead than he was alive.
A little too much make-up though, don't you think?
If not he'd be white and would give us the chills
but I think it's a complete waste of time.
He'll start to rot in a few hours.
He looks better without a beard.
He looks younger.
He's unrecognizable without it.
He looks gay.
I always told him to shave.
Without that beard, he's so handsome.
He looks like a fairy.
Why did you shave him?
It was one of his last requests.
If you don't mind, could you join the others?
I'd like to be alone with him.
Darling!
What the hell are you doing alive?
I don't know.
I just woke up.
My God, what a shock.
How can this be?
The doctor confirmed your death a few hours ago.
He confirmed it badly then.
Because, as you can see,
I'm alive.
I feel absolutely fine.
We're burying you in an hour.
Your friends are here, it's all ready.
Even people who don't like you came.
We'll cancel it that's that.
I'll go out right now and explain it all.
Are you crazy?
It's been a lot of trouble.
There are hundreds of people.
There are high expectations.
That many people came?
It's a success.
I've always been a popular guy.
They'll be happy I'm alive.
Darling
I'm your wife and I love you
but it's too late now.
We're used to the idea now.
What do you mean?
We can't lose face.
We'd look stupid.
I'd be a laughing stock.
There's a lot at stake.
What do you mean?
You have to die.
You can't just resurrect like this.
Are you serious?
Of course.
Shit You can't do this to me.
Juan, don't talk back to me.
Your mother is here.
My parents are on their way.
When they arrive, they want you dead and buried.
We can't let them down.
I don't want to die yet.
I'm not ready.
Darling.
Do you love me?
Yes.
Well, if you really love me
die.
You want me to kill myself?
My little boy.
My little boy's gone.
Faustina, don't fuss over him you'll crease his suit.
Goodness me.
He's so handsome without his beard.
You shaved my beard in the end.
What are you doing alive?
I don't know but I've woken up.
See?
Fresh as a daisy.
It's a miracle!
Yes.
Of course, I said that to her:
"It's a miracle", but
now I want to go outside and give everybody the good news.
But she won't let me.
She says I have to die.
He wants to cancel the funeral.
He says he doesn't want to be buried until he's dead.
Cancel the funeral?
Are you crazy?
Do you know the amount of people here?
It's the funeral of the year.
It cannot be canceled.
But, Mum?
Don't "mum" me.
You'll be buried today and that's that.
We can't lose face with everybody.
But I don't want to die, Mum.
Son,
don't be selfish.
You have less than one hour
to die.
What rotten luck.
How am I supposed to do it?
I don't know.
I don't know Hold your breath like when you have the hiccups.
Hiccups?
I can't.
I'm suffocating.
Darling, that's the idea.
I don't like it.
Think of another way. I don't like this one.
Don't cry.
Cooperate a little, son!
If you want me to die then think of something else.
Why don't you cut your veins?
How's it going, darling?
I feel a little dizzy
but that's about it.
The funeral workers are coming in 30 minutes,
they can't find him like this!
Marisa, darling?
Go to the kitchen, get the carving knife and stab me
as many times as it takes.
Me?
Stab you?
How can he be so macabre?
I can't take anymore.
Come on.
Harder.
You won't die.
Don't you feel anything?
My dear
my stomach hurts, but
I think I'm just nervous.
Damn it, Juanito.
Just die!
How's it going?
Mum!
We're running out of time.
People are impatient.
This bastard doesn't want to die.
I'll help.
I found this in the kitchen.
Mum?
What are you going to do?
You keep stabbing him.
I'm going to whisk his stomach.
It's disgusting!
Life is disgusting
death more so.
What beautiful words, Mum.
Why are you smoking?
Smoking kills.
It'll take hours for him to bleed out.
It's not working.
But the blood is perfectly fluffy.
Fantastic.
Look at it all.
I didn't want to let anyone down and now it's a disaster.
I gave my life preparing this funeral
for nothing.
Who will clean all this blood?
What will we say?
What will they think of us?
Look!
Look at our dresses
and what we've done to your son.
What do we look like?
You look like what you are:
Two fucking psychopaths.
How dare you insult your mother.
Who does he think he is?
Some manners!
He's not moving.
What?
He's not moving
or breathing.
Are you sure?
Yes
yes.
I think you killed him.
I killed
my son?
Yes, Faustina.
You killed him!
No.
I can't have done.
Not my son, no.
But Faustina, isn't this what we wanted?
The worst thing that can happen to a mother
is to lose her child!
But, at least
we don't have to cancel the ceremony.
I think I scared them.
They didn't recognize me without my beard.
What do we do now?
Why can't I die?
Why can't I die?!
Dr Gonzalez, please go to surgery.
Now what? you fucking gringo.
I have my green card!
Well yeah.
You can help me, give me my job back.
What the fuck did you do?
You destroyed my car, fucking gringo!
And the gringo wants to charge us for the wall.
Tell him no, fucking racist gringo!
We won't pay you shit!
Mr. Trump
look, we are honest people and
we only want to ask you to...
Who changed my case?
Who did you steal this from?
Well, it was there
Play the guitar!
Sing something, but in English, or he won't understand.
Come here Mr. diplomat.
It's up to you to demand him
put it on!
If you don't
he'll step over our people and destroy our culture.
Go, hurry up!
Now, who could save us?
Hey what's that?
It's a miracle!
It's quetzalcoatl.
Is it the hail Mary?
It is the hail Mary!
Hell yeah motherfucker!