1
00:01:16,911 --> 00:01:18,163
Brad!

2
00:01:18,663 --> 00:01:19,998
- Bye, Daddy!
- Bye, sweetie.

3
00:01:20,248 --> 00:01:22,250
Bye-bye, guys.
I'll pick you up on Monday!

4
00:01:22,751 --> 00:01:24,919
- Brad!
- What's up?

5
00:01:25,003 --> 00:01:27,005
Hey, Brad!
Looking good, buddy!

6
00:01:30,091 --> 00:01:32,594
- Dylan, where's your retainer?
- I left it at Dad's.

7
00:01:32,844 --> 00:01:34,137
Hey, where's your
math workbook?

8
00:01:34,220 --> 00:01:35,764
At Mom's house.

9
00:01:36,598 --> 00:01:38,266
- Where are all your undies?
- I don't know.

10
00:01:38,600 --> 00:01:40,268
How do we got so many undies?

11
00:01:42,103 --> 00:01:43,438
Happy Birthday, buddy!

12
00:01:44,939 --> 00:01:46,608
Brad already got me one.

13
00:01:46,941 --> 00:01:48,067
It was my idea!

14
00:01:48,151 --> 00:01:49,444
It was my idea!

15
00:01:50,904 --> 00:01:52,280
Hey, look at that.

16
00:01:52,530 --> 00:01:53,531
Guys!

17
00:01:53,782 --> 00:01:54,866
Daddy!

18
00:01:58,745 --> 00:02:00,246
Oh!

19
00:02:01,372 --> 00:02:02,707
Megan, hold up!

20
00:02:04,542 --> 00:02:05,543
Whoa!

21
00:02:07,003 --> 00:02:08,046
Ahh!

22
00:02:08,129 --> 00:02:09,422
- Are you all right?
- I'm okay.

23
00:02:14,093 --> 00:02:16,429
Right here! Don't...
Don't leave without it.

24
00:02:20,433 --> 00:02:23,269
Come on! Keep it moving!

25
00:02:23,603 --> 00:02:25,522
Inside the cones!

26
00:02:25,605 --> 00:02:28,441
Inside the cones
like an ice cream. Let's go!

27
00:02:28,608 --> 00:02:29,692
Braddie!

28
00:02:30,109 --> 00:02:31,611
Here you go, buddy.

29
00:02:31,694 --> 00:02:33,196
Oh. Thanks, Braddie.

30
00:02:33,279 --> 00:02:34,531
- Hot cocoa?
- Yeah.

31
00:02:34,614 --> 00:02:36,491
Nice! Little marshmallows
floating around there

32
00:02:36,574 --> 00:02:38,451
all in formation.
You are the greatest!

33
00:02:38,618 --> 00:02:40,036
I put a little licorice root
in there, too.

34
00:02:40,119 --> 00:02:41,287
- Oh!
- Tell me what you think.

35
00:02:41,496 --> 00:02:42,914
- Hey, guys!
- Daddies!

36
00:02:42,997 --> 00:02:45,750
- Hey! Hi, how was your day?
- Good.

37
00:02:46,417 --> 00:02:47,752
All right, guys, hop in.

38
00:02:47,836 --> 00:02:49,921
I'll get them ready and I'll
meet you at Tae Kwon Do.

39
00:02:50,171 --> 00:02:52,090
- See you in 30.
- Great. Looking forward to it.

40
00:02:52,257 --> 00:02:53,591
- Bye.
- Bye, Dad!

41
00:02:53,675 --> 00:02:55,009
Oh!

42
00:02:55,093 --> 00:02:56,427
- Dusty!
- Yeah?

43
00:02:56,678 --> 00:02:58,346
Sorry. You made treats
for tonight, right?

44
00:02:58,429 --> 00:02:59,472
No, I got the gift card.

45
00:02:59,556 --> 00:03:00,557
I thought
you were on treats tonight.

46
00:03:00,640 --> 00:03:02,350
No. I did gift card
and the treats for

47
00:03:02,433 --> 00:03:03,852
the Halloween Spooktacular.

48
00:03:04,018 --> 00:03:05,645
Oh, okay. Well, I guess
I'll hit the bakery

49
00:03:05,728 --> 00:03:06,771
- on the way to the pageant.
- Bakery?

50
00:03:06,938 --> 00:03:08,106
Unless you don't want me
to go to the bakery.

51
00:03:08,189 --> 00:03:09,649
Usually, when you repeat
what I said

52
00:03:09,732 --> 00:03:10,775
and you shake your head
up and down,

53
00:03:10,859 --> 00:03:11,943
it really means
you don't want me to do it.

54
00:03:12,026 --> 00:03:13,194
- I'm just thinking...
- What?

55
00:03:13,278 --> 00:03:14,612
Maybe homemade?

56
00:03:14,696 --> 00:03:17,115
Yeah. Hey! Honk at him again,
you better count your teeth!

57
00:03:17,448 --> 00:03:19,534
No problem, Braddie.
Homemade snickerdoodles

58
00:03:19,617 --> 00:03:20,702
coming right up.
One for you, too.

59
00:03:20,952 --> 00:03:23,371
Should we fist bump again
or would it be awkward?

60
00:03:23,580 --> 00:03:25,790
I don't mind
a second bump. All right.

61
00:03:25,999 --> 00:03:27,125
Thanks, buddy.
See you tonight.

62
00:03:27,208 --> 00:03:28,293
Bye, mate.
Thanks so much for the cocoa.

63
00:03:28,459 --> 00:03:29,460
Bye, Daddy!

64
00:03:29,919 --> 00:03:32,171
Sorry.

65
00:03:35,758 --> 00:03:37,927
These look great.
Thank you.

66
00:03:38,261 --> 00:03:39,470
- Look at that.
- Oh...

67
00:03:39,637 --> 00:03:42,348
- Daddy! Karen!
- Hey! Hey, guys.

68
00:03:42,432 --> 00:03:45,101
Wow, look how sexy
Karen looks.

69
00:03:45,435 --> 00:03:47,186
Leather pants and side boob.

70
00:03:47,270 --> 00:03:48,688
That's perfect
for a school function.

71
00:03:48,855 --> 00:03:50,315
Honey, let's expect
good things, okay?

72
00:03:50,398 --> 00:03:51,441
I know, you're right. Right.

73
00:03:51,649 --> 00:03:53,943
- Hey! How's it going?
- Hey.

74
00:03:54,319 --> 00:03:55,361
- Hi.
- Hi.

75
00:03:56,112 --> 00:03:57,780
Wow, look at you guys!

76
00:03:58,114 --> 00:03:59,782
You and Mommy
are so sassy all the time.

77
00:03:59,866 --> 00:04:00,909
- Hi.
- Hi.

78
00:04:00,992 --> 00:04:02,952
Oh, hey! I got your novel.

79
00:04:03,286 --> 00:04:05,455
- It's amazing!
- Oh, I'm glad you like it.

80
00:04:05,622 --> 00:04:06,706
I don't know
how you write

81
00:04:06,789 --> 00:04:07,999
such powerful dialogue.

82
00:04:08,082 --> 00:04:09,208
I mean, it must just
come naturally, right?

83
00:04:09,292 --> 00:04:10,293
Aww.

84
00:04:10,376 --> 00:04:11,961
- Like everything else.
- You're so sweet.

85
00:04:12,045 --> 00:04:13,046
- Are you guys ready?
- Let's go.

86
00:04:14,380 --> 00:04:15,965
I want my shirt
like Adrianna's.

87
00:04:16,049 --> 00:04:18,343
Uh, no. No, no, no, honey.
We're not doing that, okay?

88
00:04:18,426 --> 00:04:20,386
Put that back in.
Look like a nice kid.

89
00:04:23,139 --> 00:04:25,475
Welcome to
the One Horse Open Sing!

90
00:04:25,808 --> 00:04:27,977
Before we get started,
notice we have

91
00:04:28,311 --> 00:04:31,648
several professional video
and still photographers

92
00:04:31,856 --> 00:04:33,691
to cover all your kids
for free.

93
00:04:33,983 --> 00:04:36,152
So you can all put your phones
in your pockets,

94
00:04:36,486 --> 00:04:38,738
relax, and just be
in the moment.

95
00:04:40,448 --> 00:04:41,783
You don't care.

96
00:04:42,659 --> 00:04:43,993
<i>Dashing through the snow</i>

97
00:04:44,077 --> 00:04:46,162
<i>In a one-horse open sleigh</i>

98
00:04:46,454 --> 00:04:49,958
<i>O'er the fields we go
Laughing all the way, hahaha</i>

99
00:04:50,291 --> 00:04:53,962
<i>Bells on bobtail ring
Making spirits bright</i>

100
00:04:54,295 --> 00:04:55,588
<i>What fun it is
to laugh and sing</i>

101
00:04:55,672 --> 00:04:57,966
<i>A sleighing song tonight</i>

102
00:04:58,132 --> 00:05:00,134
...eat candy Santas
and smashed potatoes

103
00:05:00,218 --> 00:05:01,302
and dressing up my dog

104
00:05:01,636 --> 00:05:02,804
like a reindeer.

105
00:05:02,887 --> 00:05:04,138
That's what
Christmas means to me.

106
00:05:04,389 --> 00:05:06,182
Thank you.

107
00:05:06,808 --> 00:05:09,310
And now we have Megan Mayron.

108
00:05:10,687 --> 00:05:12,188
My name is Megan Mayron,

109
00:05:12,271 --> 00:05:14,190
and I like
Christmas presents a lot.

110
00:05:16,150 --> 00:05:18,152
But I don't
really like Christmas.

111
00:05:18,987 --> 00:05:20,822
My daddy was
at my first Christmases,

112
00:05:21,155 --> 00:05:23,324
but I don't remember
those ones.

113
00:05:23,658 --> 00:05:25,994
Then we had some
with no daddy at all.

114
00:05:26,619 --> 00:05:27,829
Then Brad came,

115
00:05:27,912 --> 00:05:30,289
but he was always trying
way too hard

116
00:05:30,623 --> 00:05:32,792
and making everyone
feel uncomfortable.

117
00:05:33,126 --> 00:05:34,252
Then Daddy came back,

118
00:05:34,419 --> 00:05:36,004
and Brad did
a pretend Christmas

119
00:05:36,087 --> 00:05:37,964
to show Daddy that Brad
was better than him.

120
00:05:38,464 --> 00:05:40,591
So now we have to go
to different houses

121
00:05:40,675 --> 00:05:42,051
to have different Christmases.

122
00:05:42,301 --> 00:05:43,928
Me and my brother wish
we were like other families

123
00:05:44,012 --> 00:05:45,388
and we had normal Christmases.

124
00:05:45,555 --> 00:05:47,140
But we still like
our Christmas presents.

125
00:05:47,473 --> 00:05:49,559
I want to be very clear
about that.

126
00:05:49,642 --> 00:05:50,810
Thank you very much.

127
00:05:55,023 --> 00:05:57,025
Enjoy paying
for therapy, boys!

128
00:05:57,191 --> 00:05:58,818
You better
shut your mouth, Jerry!

129
00:05:58,901 --> 00:05:59,944
Absolutely, Dusty.

130
00:06:01,904 --> 00:06:04,157
We're messing up our kids,
Brad, and it's on you.

131
00:06:04,657 --> 00:06:06,159
On me? Why is it on me?

132
00:06:06,325 --> 00:06:08,661
Because before you came around
we only had one Christmas.

133
00:06:08,745 --> 00:06:10,246
So it's on you.

134
00:06:10,329 --> 00:06:11,372
Hold on, hold on.

135
00:06:11,456 --> 00:06:12,540
We don't have to
circle the wagons

136
00:06:12,623 --> 00:06:14,417
every time one of the kids
expresses a negative emotion.

137
00:06:14,500 --> 00:06:15,710
They're fine.

138
00:06:15,877 --> 00:06:17,045
Kids that get up
in front of whole schools

139
00:06:17,128 --> 00:06:19,088
and say they don't like
Christmas aren't fine, Sara.

140
00:06:19,297 --> 00:06:21,716
Well, she said she didn't like
having two Christmases.

141
00:06:21,883 --> 00:06:23,217
Which is on you.

142
00:06:23,384 --> 00:06:26,054
So what if we all spend
a Christmas together?

143
00:06:26,220 --> 00:06:27,972
A Together Christmas.
That's good.

144
00:06:28,056 --> 00:06:29,640
Now you fixed it. See, that...

145
00:06:29,724 --> 00:06:31,059
Now it's off of you.

146
00:06:31,225 --> 00:06:32,560
Let's invite
Adrianna's dad, too.

147
00:06:32,727 --> 00:06:33,728
- What?
- Yes.

148
00:06:33,811 --> 00:06:34,979
Are you being serious
right now? No!

149
00:06:35,146 --> 00:06:36,230
Put that hand down.

150
00:06:36,314 --> 00:06:37,607
I've been nothing but nice
to that guy,

151
00:06:37,690 --> 00:06:39,067
and he treats me like
I abducted his kid.

152
00:06:39,150 --> 00:06:40,151
I'm not doing that.

153
00:06:40,318 --> 00:06:41,569
Why are you messing up
the mood now, all right?

154
00:06:41,652 --> 00:06:43,196
We wanna go tell the kids
my great idea

155
00:06:43,279 --> 00:06:44,405
about the Together Christmas.

156
00:06:44,655 --> 00:06:46,074
Wait, how did it become
your idea?

157
00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:48,743
It was your idea, but I
named it Together Christmas.

158
00:06:49,035 --> 00:06:50,870
<i>People of Bikini Bottom...</i>

159
00:06:51,329 --> 00:06:52,914
Hey, guys?

160
00:06:53,706 --> 00:06:56,209
Guys. Listen up,
I got a surprise.

161
00:06:56,626 --> 00:06:57,794
Hello?

162
00:07:00,963 --> 00:07:03,466
- Guys. We got a big surprise!
- A surprise?

163
00:07:03,633 --> 00:07:05,051
- Another pony?
- A trampoline?

164
00:07:05,134 --> 00:07:06,135
You leaving?

165
00:07:06,219 --> 00:07:07,512
Not quite, okay? But, no,

166
00:07:07,595 --> 00:07:08,763
we got something better
than that, okay?

167
00:07:08,930 --> 00:07:10,223
So much better.
It's gonna be great.

168
00:07:10,306 --> 00:07:12,058
Guys, this year, no more
back and forth at Christmas.

169
00:07:12,141 --> 00:07:13,810
- No back and forth.
- Nope. I just said that.

170
00:07:13,976 --> 00:07:15,561
No more back and forth
at Christmas.

171
00:07:15,645 --> 00:07:17,105
This year, we're gonna spend
one Christmas

172
00:07:17,188 --> 00:07:18,731
- all together, all of us!
- Yay!

173
00:07:18,815 --> 00:07:19,899
All of us.
A Together Christmas!

174
00:07:19,982 --> 00:07:21,067
A Together Christmas!

175
00:07:21,150 --> 00:07:22,235
Can you be quiet?

176
00:07:22,318 --> 00:07:23,444
A Together Christmas
like a normal family!

177
00:07:23,528 --> 00:07:24,570
Yay!

178
00:07:24,654 --> 00:07:25,696
I'll get it.

179
00:07:26,656 --> 00:07:27,907
Hello?

180
00:07:28,241 --> 00:07:29,575
Grandpa Kurt?

181
00:07:31,953 --> 00:07:33,579
Daddy, Grandpa Kurt
wants to talk to you.

182
00:07:33,830 --> 00:07:35,373
No, no, no.
Dusty, I'll just tell him...

183
00:07:35,456 --> 00:07:37,416
No. It's okay, Sara.

184
00:07:37,750 --> 00:07:39,001
Thank you.

185
00:07:39,836 --> 00:07:40,837
Thanks, buddy.

186
00:07:44,257 --> 00:07:45,591
What, Dad?

187
00:07:46,676 --> 00:07:48,010
Yeah, long time.

188
00:07:48,344 --> 00:07:49,679
No, I'm fine.

189
00:07:49,846 --> 00:07:51,597
- Tomorrow?
- No.

190
00:07:51,764 --> 00:07:54,016
I could probably
pick you up, I guess, but...

191
00:07:54,100 --> 00:07:55,852
Hey! Psst! Guess what?
My folks are coming tomorrow.

192
00:07:55,935 --> 00:07:56,936
I don't care.

193
00:07:57,019 --> 00:07:59,105
- We can go together.
- You shut up.

194
00:07:59,438 --> 00:08:03,526
Dad, do you want to
just text... Hello?

195
00:08:08,406 --> 00:08:11,075
Dusty, listen to me, I think
you're approaching this

196
00:08:11,159 --> 00:08:12,743
with way too much
negative energy.

197
00:08:12,910 --> 00:08:13,995
Brad, you don't know
what you're talking about,

198
00:08:14,078 --> 00:08:15,746
so shut your fat hole!

199
00:08:15,830 --> 00:08:17,665
Dusty.

200
00:08:17,874 --> 00:08:19,876
I'm sorry, Braddie. I'm sorry.

201
00:08:20,209 --> 00:08:21,544
You see what he does to me?

202
00:08:21,627 --> 00:08:22,712
He's not even here yet,

203
00:08:22,795 --> 00:08:23,963
and he's already
ruining Christmas.

204
00:08:24,046 --> 00:08:26,132
- Okay, okay, relax. Relax.
- I can't!

205
00:08:26,465 --> 00:08:29,385
Look, your father hasn't met
the new evolved Dusty.

206
00:08:29,719 --> 00:08:32,555
You're a progressive,
sensitive, child-first parent.

207
00:08:32,722 --> 00:08:33,806
That's exactly the stuff
he's gonna

208
00:08:33,890 --> 00:08:34,974
make fun of us for.
You'll see.

209
00:08:35,057 --> 00:08:37,560
He's gonna scoff at everything
we do. He's a scoffer, Brad.

210
00:08:37,894 --> 00:08:39,520
Pepe, you have
a grown son, right?

211
00:08:39,604 --> 00:08:40,646
<i>Sí.</i>

212
00:08:40,730 --> 00:08:43,399
Why don't you tell Dusty here
how much your son means to you

213
00:08:43,482 --> 00:08:45,234
in this season of good cheer?

214
00:08:45,693 --> 00:08:49,906
My son is an abysmal disappointment
whose birth I regret more each day.

215
00:08:49,989 --> 00:08:51,324
- You see?
- He didn't say nice things

216
00:08:51,407 --> 00:08:52,491
like you think he did, Brad.

217
00:08:52,742 --> 00:08:54,035
Dusty, you're being silly.

218
00:08:54,118 --> 00:08:55,828
I mean, who wouldn't be
impressed with you?

219
00:08:56,078 --> 00:08:57,788
Come on.

220
00:08:57,872 --> 00:08:58,998
Dear God!

221
00:09:03,544 --> 00:09:04,921
He looks as if
he's been chiseled

222
00:09:05,004 --> 00:09:06,339
from Gibraltar itself.

223
00:09:11,219 --> 00:09:14,055
This is gonna come off weird,
Dusty, but he's beautiful!

224
00:09:17,808 --> 00:09:19,227
I want to be his friend
so bad.

225
00:09:27,777 --> 00:09:29,445
- Dusty.
- Hey, Pop.

226
00:09:29,695 --> 00:09:31,822
- How was your flight?
- Not bad.

227
00:09:31,906 --> 00:09:34,200
Took 20 minutes to get
to the gate though.

228
00:09:34,283 --> 00:09:36,244
What's with that bottleneck
you got out there, huh?

229
00:09:36,535 --> 00:09:39,330
I'm sorry
our local airport tarmac's

230
00:09:39,413 --> 00:09:40,539
not up to your standards, huh?

231
00:09:40,873 --> 00:09:43,584
I'm sorry. I didn't realize
you designed this airport,

232
00:09:43,668 --> 00:09:45,044
or I'd have been
more sensitive.

233
00:09:45,294 --> 00:09:47,296
Oh, I guess I'll move to a new
town with a better airport

234
00:09:47,380 --> 00:09:48,506
that way
you won't be inconvenienced

235
00:09:48,589 --> 00:09:49,966
when you show up
every five years or so.

236
00:09:50,049 --> 00:09:52,551
Same old
Mr. Touchy. I love it.

237
00:09:52,760 --> 00:09:54,595
Here you go, Pancho. Why don't
you bring the car around,

238
00:09:54,679 --> 00:09:55,721
we'll meet you at the curb.

239
00:09:55,930 --> 00:09:57,014
Right away, sir.

240
00:09:57,223 --> 00:09:59,976
I mean, no, I'm sorry,
I'm not the driver.

241
00:10:00,309 --> 00:10:01,394
No, I'm Brad.

242
00:10:01,560 --> 00:10:02,561
The stepdad.

243
00:10:02,728 --> 00:10:04,647
- This is Sara's husband.
- Why is he with you?

244
00:10:04,730 --> 00:10:07,066
Dad!

245
00:10:10,736 --> 00:10:12,363
That sweater!
He wears the red sweater,

246
00:10:12,446 --> 00:10:13,489
so I can see him in a crowd.

247
00:10:16,867 --> 00:10:17,952
Dad!

248
00:10:18,035 --> 00:10:20,204
That's him, that's Dad.

249
00:10:25,626 --> 00:10:27,461
Dad! Dad!

250
00:10:37,138 --> 00:10:38,139
I made a sign!

251
00:10:38,222 --> 00:10:39,640
There's my big man!

252
00:10:43,644 --> 00:10:45,730
And this guy's raising
your kids half the time?

253
00:10:45,938 --> 00:10:48,024
He hasn't seen his dad
in a really long time.

254
00:10:48,190 --> 00:10:49,650
It's only been
since Thanksgiving,

255
00:10:49,734 --> 00:10:51,068
but it feels like forever!

256
00:10:51,235 --> 00:10:52,611
- It does!
- Oh!

257
00:10:53,654 --> 00:10:56,073
Four weeks?
It's been a few years for us.

258
00:10:56,324 --> 00:10:58,826
What should we do?
Want me to take my pants off?

259
00:10:58,909 --> 00:11:00,077
Hey, where's Mom?

260
00:11:00,328 --> 00:11:01,704
You didn't get her text?

261
00:11:01,787 --> 00:11:04,373
Uncle Arny came down with
a bad case of the shingles.

262
00:11:04,457 --> 00:11:06,917
- Oh, no.
- So Mom's staying back

263
00:11:07,001 --> 00:11:08,419
- to take care of him.
- Okay.

264
00:11:08,502 --> 00:11:10,046
But, hey, you still got me.

265
00:11:10,546 --> 00:11:12,423
I sure do. I sure do!

266
00:11:12,506 --> 00:11:13,716
Oh!

267
00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:16,218
We're gonna have
the best time.

268
00:11:16,635 --> 00:11:18,220
Oh! Dusty!

269
00:11:18,763 --> 00:11:21,140
- Hey, Don.
- Hey, Muscles, come here!

270
00:11:21,307 --> 00:11:23,893
I've got a cold.
Stay away. Don, Don!

271
00:11:24,685 --> 00:11:27,063
Say, Dusty,
Brad told me about this

272
00:11:27,146 --> 00:11:28,689
Together Christmas
we're doing.

273
00:11:28,981 --> 00:11:32,735
You two are such wonderful,
progressive co-dads.

274
00:11:32,902 --> 00:11:33,903
Co-dads?

275
00:11:34,070 --> 00:11:35,571
Oh, I'm so sorry. Mr. Mayron,

276
00:11:35,654 --> 00:11:36,822
this is my father,
Don Whitaker.

277
00:11:36,906 --> 00:11:39,408
The pleasure
is all mine, Captain!

278
00:11:39,742 --> 00:11:41,744
You piloted
the Space Shuttle Atlantis

279
00:11:42,036 --> 00:11:44,747
in 1992 and commanded
the Endeavour

280
00:11:44,830 --> 00:11:46,290
on three missions in 1994!

281
00:11:46,540 --> 00:11:48,292
All right, come on,
we're out this way.

282
00:11:48,709 --> 00:11:50,002
Thanks, Dusty.

283
00:11:50,211 --> 00:11:51,754
Say, Kurt, did you meet

284
00:11:51,837 --> 00:11:53,547
any interesting folks
on your flight?

285
00:11:53,798 --> 00:11:56,467
I met a Scotch and a pillow.

286
00:11:56,550 --> 00:11:58,844
You know, actually,
I always pick the flights

287
00:11:58,928 --> 00:12:00,888
that have the most connections
so that

288
00:12:01,222 --> 00:12:04,600
I get to chat with as many
new people as possible.

289
00:12:04,683 --> 00:12:06,894
Oh, so you're a lunatic.
Good to know.

290
00:12:07,144 --> 00:12:08,896
<i>That's me!</i>

291
00:12:17,029 --> 00:12:18,739
Looks like one of
your neighbors

292
00:12:18,823 --> 00:12:20,491
is getting
an oversized parcel.

293
00:12:21,117 --> 00:12:22,451
Hello!

294
00:12:22,910 --> 00:12:25,246
Don Whitaker,
United States Postal Service!

295
00:12:25,454 --> 00:12:26,705
Retired, but never too old

296
00:12:26,789 --> 00:12:28,457
to lend a hand
to a fellow carrier.

297
00:12:29,291 --> 00:12:30,334
Brad, I gotta tell you,

298
00:12:30,418 --> 00:12:32,128
this baby sure gives you
a smooth ride.

299
00:12:32,378 --> 00:12:33,462
Oh, thank you, Kurt.

300
00:12:33,546 --> 00:12:35,756
Yeah, it is
surprisingly responsive.

301
00:12:35,840 --> 00:12:36,882
Brad, he's not...

302
00:12:36,966 --> 00:12:38,634
So do they take your balls
right there at the dealership,

303
00:12:38,717 --> 00:12:40,052
or do you send them in
with the registration?

304
00:12:40,136 --> 00:12:41,220
How does it work exactly?

305
00:12:41,387 --> 00:12:42,596
No, no,
they didn't take my balls.

306
00:12:42,680 --> 00:12:43,722
Just $2,000 down.

307
00:12:43,889 --> 00:12:46,058
This your place, Dusty?
I pictured it nicer.

308
00:12:46,392 --> 00:12:47,685
Yeah,
Dusty's house is nicer.

309
00:12:47,768 --> 00:12:48,894
This is my house.
Just thought

310
00:12:49,145 --> 00:12:51,105
you'd like to step in
and see the kids.

311
00:12:51,272 --> 00:12:52,273
Only if it's okay.

312
00:12:52,356 --> 00:12:53,649
Look, we don't want to
infringe on your days.

313
00:12:53,816 --> 00:12:55,734
Of course,
don't be silly. Come on, guys.

314
00:12:56,068 --> 00:12:57,528
You got to ask
another man's permission

315
00:12:57,611 --> 00:12:58,821
to see your own kids?

316
00:12:58,904 --> 00:13:01,073
Unbelievable.

317
00:13:02,241 --> 00:13:05,244
We're back! With more daddies!

318
00:13:05,327 --> 00:13:08,122
Hey! Look how big
you two got!

319
00:13:08,372 --> 00:13:10,458
Come on.
Don't I get a hug? Come on!

320
00:13:12,042 --> 00:13:13,544
And who's this
barroom brawler?

321
00:13:13,711 --> 00:13:15,212
He's our brother,
Griffy, silly.

322
00:13:15,463 --> 00:13:17,715
Hey, come here, pardner.
Dusty, you never told me.

323
00:13:18,048 --> 00:13:20,384
- Why, he looks just like you.
- Yeah, not my kid.

324
00:13:20,551 --> 00:13:22,136
Oh, no, no, no.
I fathered that one.

325
00:13:22,553 --> 00:13:24,221
Oh. Ah, then how does he
relate to me then?

326
00:13:24,555 --> 00:13:27,057
Well, he is the brother
of your grandkids, Kurt.

327
00:13:27,224 --> 00:13:29,226
- Oh. Here, here.
- Oh. Okay.

328
00:13:29,393 --> 00:13:31,061
Hey, looking good, Buttercup.

329
00:13:31,228 --> 00:13:32,563
Good to see you.

330
00:13:33,481 --> 00:13:35,900
- Look who's here!
- Pop-Pop!

331
00:13:37,109 --> 00:13:38,819
- Tell us a Pop-Pop joke!
- Ooh, ooh.

332
00:13:38,903 --> 00:13:40,821
What's a good one? Uh, why
does a duck have feathers?

333
00:13:40,905 --> 00:13:41,906
Why?

334
00:13:42,072 --> 00:13:45,409
To cover up his butt quack.

335
00:13:46,368 --> 00:13:48,037
Hey, kids,
I got a good one for you.

336
00:13:48,245 --> 00:13:49,330
Two dead hookers

337
00:13:49,413 --> 00:13:50,456
- wash up on the shore...
- Hey, hey!

338
00:13:50,539 --> 00:13:52,208
- Whoa, whoa, shut up.
- No way. No way.

339
00:13:52,541 --> 00:13:55,377
- Sara. How's my girl?
- Hi!

340
00:13:56,378 --> 00:13:57,880
What, Ginny couldn't make it?

341
00:13:58,130 --> 00:13:59,256
Oh, she feels terrible.

342
00:13:59,340 --> 00:14:01,634
But she sent a batch of
her special cookies!

343
00:14:02,051 --> 00:14:04,053
Is there milk in that kitchen?

344
00:14:04,136 --> 00:14:06,096
- Yay!
- I want the first one.

345
00:14:06,180 --> 00:14:08,057
I get the first one!

346
00:14:08,390 --> 00:14:11,727
So he gets to be Pop-Pop
and I'm just Grandpa Kurt?

347
00:14:12,019 --> 00:14:14,021
What? I'm in charge of the
cutesy grandpa names now?

348
00:14:14,104 --> 00:14:15,189
Look, if you want
a better name,

349
00:14:15,272 --> 00:14:16,357
maybe try showing up
a little more often.

350
00:14:16,565 --> 00:14:19,485
Tell the kids, from now on,
it's El Padre.

351
00:14:21,487 --> 00:14:22,905
No more hooker jokes.

352
00:14:25,241 --> 00:14:26,867
These don't taste
like La-La's cookies.

353
00:14:26,951 --> 00:14:28,160
They taste like Chips Ahoys.

354
00:14:28,369 --> 00:14:30,704
No, no. I sat right there
in the kitchen

355
00:14:30,788 --> 00:14:32,873
and watched Grandma
bake them just yesterday.

356
00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:34,041
I like them.

357
00:14:34,208 --> 00:14:37,044
So, this co-dads thing,
is that what you call it?

358
00:14:37,545 --> 00:14:39,380
Yeah, that's what we call it.

359
00:14:39,588 --> 00:14:41,799
So, on his watch,
he disciplines your kids,

360
00:14:41,882 --> 00:14:43,551
gives them advice,
tucks them in, so forth

361
00:14:43,634 --> 00:14:44,718
and that bothers you
not a bit?

362
00:14:45,052 --> 00:14:46,053
Doesn't bother me at all.

363
00:14:46,303 --> 00:14:47,972
And his total lack
of masculinity...

364
00:14:48,222 --> 00:14:49,431
I mean, his weak chin

365
00:14:49,515 --> 00:14:51,725
and soft underbelly
influencing your son,

366
00:14:52,059 --> 00:14:53,394
you're good there, too?
Yeah?

367
00:14:53,561 --> 00:14:54,770
You know what?
I'm just feeling like

368
00:14:54,853 --> 00:14:56,146
maybe you guys
want a little privacy.

369
00:14:56,564 --> 00:14:57,898
Stay right there, Brad,
all right?

370
00:14:57,982 --> 00:14:59,650
He's just trying
to stir the turd.

371
00:14:59,733 --> 00:15:01,318
You can scoff all you want.

372
00:15:01,402 --> 00:15:02,570
Everything is rock solid

373
00:15:02,653 --> 00:15:04,321
between me and Brad here.
In fact,

374
00:15:04,655 --> 00:15:07,366
- best friends.
- Really?

375
00:15:07,575 --> 00:15:08,909
- Thank you.
- Brad. Stop it.

376
00:15:09,243 --> 00:15:10,869
- I'm good.
- Now. He gets

377
00:15:10,953 --> 00:15:12,121
really emotional. Brad.

378
00:15:12,538 --> 00:15:14,790
- Hey. Brother.
- Did you call me "brother"?

379
00:15:15,124 --> 00:15:16,542
B-Dawg. Chill out, man. Relax.

380
00:15:17,084 --> 00:15:18,168
All right? Cut it out.

381
00:15:18,961 --> 00:15:20,296
- Brad, don't.
- I know.

382
00:15:20,462 --> 00:15:22,798
Stop. All right, look.
Hey. Brad, stop!

383
00:15:23,132 --> 00:15:25,968
Looks like you two guys
have a real solid arrangement.

384
00:15:26,302 --> 00:15:28,304
You're spending Christmas
together and everything.

385
00:15:28,387 --> 00:15:30,639
Speaking of which, whose place
are we doing that at?

386
00:15:30,806 --> 00:15:32,808
We're totally happy to host
if it makes it easier.

387
00:15:32,891 --> 00:15:34,476
Yeah, we could do it at
my place. I got more room.

388
00:15:34,560 --> 00:15:36,562
We can do presents at
our place, dinner at yours.

389
00:15:36,729 --> 00:15:38,480
Nah, all that back and forth,
who needs that?

390
00:15:38,564 --> 00:15:39,773
This place, that place.

391
00:15:39,982 --> 00:15:43,068
Why don't I book us
a great vacation spot

392
00:15:43,402 --> 00:15:44,987
for all of us,
and we can all spend

393
00:15:45,070 --> 00:15:46,322
the holiday week together?

394
00:15:46,572 --> 00:15:47,573
- Yay! Cool!
- Thanks, El Padre.

395
00:15:48,782 --> 00:15:50,701
I love this idea!

396
00:15:50,784 --> 00:15:52,077
It's something
extra Christmasy,

397
00:15:52,161 --> 00:15:55,289
with lots of snow and family
activities for all of us.

398
00:15:55,539 --> 00:15:56,957
Dad, I'm just worried about
finding a place,

399
00:15:57,041 --> 00:15:58,292
you know,
this close to the holiday.

400
00:15:58,459 --> 00:16:01,128
Booked it! Airbnb. All done.

401
00:16:01,295 --> 00:16:02,963
Yay, El Padre!

402
00:16:03,297 --> 00:16:05,257
It's gonna be so fun,

403
00:16:05,341 --> 00:16:07,635
since we're all such
great friends, huh?

404
00:16:09,970 --> 00:16:12,640
Off to the mountains.
Here we go, Griffy.

405
00:16:12,973 --> 00:16:14,475
- Here we go.
- Big fun trip!

406
00:16:14,808 --> 00:16:16,310
Let me get that
for you, Sara.

407
00:16:16,393 --> 00:16:17,728
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

408
00:16:17,811 --> 00:16:19,480
You know, Dusty,
I think you and Kurt

409
00:16:19,563 --> 00:16:21,482
spending some time around me
and my dad might do

410
00:16:21,774 --> 00:16:23,150
you both some good.

411
00:16:23,317 --> 00:16:24,443
Hey, don't you see
what he's up to here?

412
00:16:24,526 --> 00:16:25,694
He thinks you and me
are harboring

413
00:16:25,778 --> 00:16:26,987
bad feelings
for one another

414
00:16:27,154 --> 00:16:28,197
and sticking us together
in some cabin

415
00:16:28,280 --> 00:16:29,823
is gonna bring out
whatever we're harboring.

416
00:16:29,990 --> 00:16:31,492
But you're not, are you, Brad?

417
00:16:31,659 --> 00:16:32,826
- I'm not what?
- Harboring!

418
00:16:32,910 --> 00:16:33,911
No, I'm not
harboring anything.

419
00:16:33,994 --> 00:16:35,037
Good, 'cause I'm not
harboring anything either.

420
00:16:35,120 --> 00:16:36,413
Okay, well, let's use
this as an opportunity

421
00:16:36,497 --> 00:16:37,665
to show him
that we're not harboring.

422
00:16:37,748 --> 00:16:38,791
'Cause we're not harboring.

423
00:16:38,957 --> 00:16:40,084
You're looking at
one safe harbor right here.

424
00:16:40,167 --> 00:16:41,210
All right, good.

425
00:16:41,293 --> 00:16:42,378
You sure you want to
pack it like that?

426
00:16:42,461 --> 00:16:43,504
Is that
how you're gonna do it?

427
00:16:43,587 --> 00:16:44,922
Look, me and Brad got
everything under control

428
00:16:45,005 --> 00:16:46,382
as a team, okay? Right, Brad?

429
00:16:46,465 --> 00:16:47,466
That's right.

430
00:16:47,549 --> 00:16:48,842
Yeah, what would I know
about travel?

431
00:16:48,926 --> 00:16:50,219
I've only been
to frickin' space.

432
00:16:50,469 --> 00:16:51,595
What, did you pack
the space shuttle yourself?

433
00:16:51,679 --> 00:16:52,888
You pop the trunk,
arrange all the bags

434
00:16:52,971 --> 00:16:54,056
for you
and your little space friends?

435
00:16:54,223 --> 00:16:56,308
I did, as a matter of fact.
Yes, I packed the shuttle.

436
00:16:58,143 --> 00:16:59,645
That's so cool!

437
00:16:59,937 --> 00:17:01,814
I love how you're always
jotting down ideas

438
00:17:01,897 --> 00:17:03,691
for your book
in your little notepad.

439
00:17:03,982 --> 00:17:05,275
People ever get crazy
and think

440
00:17:05,359 --> 00:17:06,902
you might be writing something
bad about them?

441
00:17:09,446 --> 00:17:12,032
Say, uh, Brad,
would you mind doing some

442
00:17:12,116 --> 00:17:14,451
"Yes, And" drills with me
on the way?

443
00:17:14,618 --> 00:17:17,121
"Yes, And" thank you
for asking me.

444
00:17:17,371 --> 00:17:20,124
I recently joined
an improv comedy workshop.

445
00:17:20,207 --> 00:17:22,042
Brad's been pushing me
to do it for years.

446
00:17:22,126 --> 00:17:23,627
Because you're so funny.

447
00:17:23,961 --> 00:17:25,003
Yeah, I enjoy it.

448
00:17:25,087 --> 00:17:26,130
You should look into it,
too, Kurt.

449
00:17:26,463 --> 00:17:27,923
I'd rather look
into a loaded gun.

450
00:17:28,132 --> 00:17:29,967
- Did you hear that?
- Did you just make that up?

451
00:17:30,134 --> 00:17:31,885
- Zinger!
- That's provocative, too.

452
00:17:32,136 --> 00:17:33,721
You ready to let me do that,
Mr. Stubborn?

453
00:17:33,887 --> 00:17:35,472
- I got it.
- It's never gonna fit.

454
00:17:35,723 --> 00:17:37,182
Hey, kids, no, no, no, no,

455
00:17:37,266 --> 00:17:39,977
why don't you jump into my car
with Adrianna, all right?

456
00:17:40,310 --> 00:17:41,437
So Grandpa Kurt here

457
00:17:41,520 --> 00:17:44,481
can enjoy Pop-Pop's company
on the way up.

458
00:17:44,648 --> 00:17:45,691
Already warmed up a spot

459
00:17:45,774 --> 00:17:47,067
in the capsule
for you, Captain!

460
00:17:47,317 --> 00:17:49,236
Still never gonna fit. Ever.

461
00:17:52,614 --> 00:17:54,366
No, I got it.
It's fitting fine.

462
00:17:54,450 --> 00:17:56,452
I just had to
put it wheels-in.

463
00:18:00,205 --> 00:18:03,292
Perfect fit!
All right, let's go.

464
00:18:03,542 --> 00:18:05,294
Hey, Adrianna, you know,
when we're up there,

465
00:18:05,377 --> 00:18:06,462
I can teach you
how to snowboard.

466
00:18:06,795 --> 00:18:08,005
You're not my dad.

467
00:18:08,088 --> 00:18:10,299
All right.
It's gonna be a fun trip.

468
00:18:15,137 --> 00:18:17,473
It's time for
One-Word Story.

469
00:18:17,639 --> 00:18:18,724
Anyone can join in,

470
00:18:18,807 --> 00:18:19,892
doesn't have to be
just Dad and I.

471
00:18:19,975 --> 00:18:21,977
You always give us
the best start.

472
00:18:22,144 --> 00:18:24,480
- Uncle...
- ...Thomas...

473
00:18:24,688 --> 00:18:26,023
- ...went...
- ...tiptoeing...

474
00:18:26,190 --> 00:18:27,316
...into the...

475
00:18:27,483 --> 00:18:28,942
...Empire State Building.

476
00:18:30,235 --> 00:18:31,820
Where were you going
with that one?

477
00:18:31,987 --> 00:18:35,324
This all took place
at the pancake breakfast!

478
00:18:35,616 --> 00:18:37,117
<i>Fifty-six bottles
of beer on the wall</i>

479
00:18:37,201 --> 00:18:38,619
<i>Fifty-six bottles of beer</i>

480
00:18:39,036 --> 00:18:40,871
"G." Georgia,
Georgia license plate!

481
00:18:41,121 --> 00:18:42,790
Ready, and... Quiet Game.

482
00:18:45,709 --> 00:18:47,294
- I'm terrible at this game!
- I can't do it!

483
00:18:47,628 --> 00:18:48,962
- I just can't do it.
- I hate the Quiet Game!

484
00:19:07,231 --> 00:19:09,483
We always liked
the Shimpahs.

485
00:19:09,817 --> 00:19:11,151
The movers thought
the Shimpahs' house

486
00:19:11,235 --> 00:19:14,029
was our house
and almost moved us in there!

487
00:19:14,112 --> 00:19:15,614
The wrong family!
We would've been

488
00:19:15,697 --> 00:19:16,824
living with the Shimpahs!

489
00:19:16,990 --> 00:19:18,617
Which I wouldn't
have minded,

490
00:19:18,700 --> 00:19:21,453
'cause I had a huge crush
on Vicky Shimpah.

491
00:19:22,663 --> 00:19:24,039
Oh, Dad, thank you.

492
00:19:24,122 --> 00:19:26,083
You make a five-hour trip
go by like that!

493
00:19:26,250 --> 00:19:27,960
I just wanted everybody
to have a good time.

494
00:19:28,126 --> 00:19:29,670
Nothing like a nice,
relaxing road trip, huh, Dad?

495
00:19:29,837 --> 00:19:31,046
Ah, it was nothing.

496
00:19:31,129 --> 00:19:33,340
I've been in a confined space
with a chimp.

497
00:19:50,858 --> 00:19:53,902
Dylan's got a girlfriend!

498
00:19:54,152 --> 00:19:55,487
No, I don't! Be quiet!

499
00:19:55,654 --> 00:19:56,738
Yeah, you love her.

500
00:19:56,822 --> 00:19:58,657
You want to buy her flowers
and kiss her on the lips.

501
00:19:58,824 --> 00:20:00,492
Stop it! It's not funny!

502
00:20:00,659 --> 00:20:02,286
Megan! What did I say

503
00:20:02,369 --> 00:20:03,579
about teasing your brother
about girls?

504
00:20:03,745 --> 00:20:05,330
She's still doing it.
And she drilled him

505
00:20:05,414 --> 00:20:06,707
in the head
with a snowball too.

506
00:20:06,874 --> 00:20:08,667
Well, I'm not her mother.

507
00:20:08,917 --> 00:20:10,168
Now, go take
your brother inside,

508
00:20:10,252 --> 00:20:11,336
please. Go on, sweetie.

509
00:20:11,503 --> 00:20:12,504
Come on, Griffy.

510
00:20:12,671 --> 00:20:15,007
So Dylan's started
noticing the girls, huh?

511
00:20:15,215 --> 00:20:17,384
You know, I think it's gonna
be time to give him the talk.

512
00:20:18,677 --> 00:20:21,346
The talk? You mean the talk
about the nitty-gritty?

513
00:20:21,513 --> 00:20:23,181
- The "nitty-gritty"?
- I'm on it, Sar-Bear.

514
00:20:23,348 --> 00:20:24,808
I've been looking forward
to this for a long time.

515
00:20:24,892 --> 00:20:26,268
I got a whole speech prepared,
all right?

516
00:20:26,435 --> 00:20:27,769
It's all heartwarming stuff.

517
00:20:27,936 --> 00:20:30,147
I'm sure you and Brad will do
a bang-up job with that.

518
00:20:31,064 --> 00:20:33,233
Unless, uh, this isn't
a co-dadding moment?

519
00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:34,985
- No.
- No.

520
00:20:35,068 --> 00:20:37,738
- I mean, no, of course it is.
- It is.

521
00:20:37,905 --> 00:20:39,156
- Yeah, it is. It's gonna be.
- Okay, yeah.

522
00:20:39,239 --> 00:20:40,324
Yeah, we're gonna talk
to him together.

523
00:20:40,490 --> 00:20:43,410
Oh, Dusty! I read about some
gender-neutral flashcards.

524
00:20:43,911 --> 00:20:45,245
- Flashcards.
- Uh-huh.

525
00:20:45,329 --> 00:20:47,497
He's got flashcards to teach
your son how to score.

526
00:20:47,664 --> 00:20:48,874
No, of course not.

527
00:20:48,957 --> 00:20:51,501
They cover human reproduction,
puberty, and hygiene.

528
00:20:51,668 --> 00:20:53,670
Okay, great. You tee it up
with the flashcards,

529
00:20:54,171 --> 00:20:55,631
and I'll knock it home
with the heartwarming speech.

530
00:20:55,714 --> 00:20:56,840
All right? We got this.

531
00:20:57,007 --> 00:20:58,008
You're all set.

532
00:20:58,175 --> 00:20:59,384
I'll never forget when

533
00:20:59,468 --> 00:21:02,429
Brad first started asking
questions about girls.

534
00:21:02,596 --> 00:21:04,890
I took him out for "the talk."

535
00:21:05,432 --> 00:21:08,101
He was so inquisitive
and attentive.

536
00:21:08,769 --> 00:21:11,313
Then I dropped him back off
at his dorm.

537
00:21:11,396 --> 00:21:12,397
Yeah...

538
00:21:13,065 --> 00:21:14,399
Well, come on in.

539
00:21:19,321 --> 00:21:20,405
Hey, look,
there's a game room!

540
00:21:20,489 --> 00:21:22,324
- Wow. Adrianna, look.
- And a pool table!

541
00:21:23,158 --> 00:21:24,159
This is what
I'm talking about.

542
00:21:24,242 --> 00:21:25,327
Look at that view!

543
00:21:26,119 --> 00:21:28,288
Look at all the mortise
and tenon joinery!

544
00:21:28,455 --> 00:21:29,665
Sittin' fat.

545
00:21:29,831 --> 00:21:31,458
Your old man sure
pulled the right rein

546
00:21:31,541 --> 00:21:32,668
getting this place.

547
00:21:32,834 --> 00:21:34,878
Oh, wow. I know. Better throw
you a parade, huh?

548
00:21:34,962 --> 00:21:37,464
Oh, I am really
looking forward to that.

549
00:21:37,547 --> 00:21:39,007
Well, you want the thank yous
printed on the bass drums

550
00:21:39,091 --> 00:21:40,467
or the sousaphone covers?

551
00:21:40,634 --> 00:21:42,803
Hey, did anyone bring
my bag in?

552
00:21:46,056 --> 00:21:48,058
My supervisor Clyde Unix...

553
00:21:48,225 --> 00:21:51,228
He took over after
Kirby Keller retired in '86.

554
00:21:51,395 --> 00:21:54,064
Horse farm,
upper peninsula of Michigan.

555
00:21:54,231 --> 00:21:56,316
Gorgeous country,
if you ever get the chance.

556
00:22:00,153 --> 00:22:01,321
Wow.

557
00:22:01,989 --> 00:22:03,323
Nice shower.

558
00:22:04,992 --> 00:22:06,410
That's weird.

559
00:22:07,327 --> 00:22:08,912
No controls.

560
00:22:09,997 --> 00:22:11,999
Hey, honey,
how do you turn the shower on?

561
00:22:12,165 --> 00:22:13,834
<i>Shower on.</i>

562
00:22:14,167 --> 00:22:15,669
Off! Shower off!

563
00:22:15,836 --> 00:22:17,337
<i>Shower off.</i>

564
00:22:17,713 --> 00:22:19,840
Gosh! Ooh!

565
00:22:20,507 --> 00:22:22,592
Voice-activated water. Cool.

566
00:22:22,801 --> 00:22:24,761
<i>Water cool.</i>

567
00:22:24,845 --> 00:22:27,014
- Off! Shower off!
<i>- Shower off.</i>

568
00:22:27,431 --> 00:22:29,099
- Water... Cool...
<i>- Water. Shower cool.</i>

569
00:22:29,266 --> 00:22:30,934
- Cool the water.
<i>- Water cool.</i>

570
00:22:31,727 --> 00:22:33,895
Water off! Turn off!

571
00:22:34,980 --> 00:22:36,231
Off.

572
00:22:36,690 --> 00:22:37,691
Oh, my God!

573
00:22:39,317 --> 00:22:40,360
Oh!

574
00:22:40,444 --> 00:22:42,612
You scored on yourself.
Friendly fire.

575
00:22:42,779 --> 00:22:44,197
Eight ball,
corner pocket.

576
00:22:44,281 --> 00:22:45,782
- Ooh! No slashing.
- Yeah.

577
00:22:45,949 --> 00:22:47,701
- Good job, babe.
- Thank you, babe.

578
00:22:48,410 --> 00:22:50,954
Come on, Sara!

579
00:22:51,288 --> 00:22:52,873
No, that is holding.

580
00:22:56,918 --> 00:22:58,295
It's too loud, Dylan!
Turn it down!

581
00:22:58,378 --> 00:22:59,421
I don't know how!

582
00:22:59,504 --> 00:23:01,131
Hey, hey, hey, turn that down!

583
00:23:01,465 --> 00:23:03,050
Griffy's asleep.

584
00:23:06,303 --> 00:23:08,138
Why are you dressed like
a woman, Brad?

585
00:23:08,305 --> 00:23:09,347
Oh, I can't find my stuff.

586
00:23:09,431 --> 00:23:11,141
Are you sure you got my bag
to fit in the car?

587
00:23:11,308 --> 00:23:12,642
Yeah, of course.
It fit perfect.

588
00:23:12,809 --> 00:23:14,811
Look, can we skip this one?
I can't stand this song.

589
00:23:15,020 --> 00:23:17,939
- Skip it. Skip it, guys.
- Oh, no, no, no! No, Sara.

590
00:23:18,106 --> 00:23:19,608
This is a great song.

591
00:23:20,108 --> 00:23:22,194
This is my real dad's
favorite Christmas song.

592
00:23:22,360 --> 00:23:24,071
Yeah, well, I'm glad
it makes him happy.

593
00:23:24,446 --> 00:23:25,864
You think I don't want
to like this song?

594
00:23:25,947 --> 00:23:27,032
Of course I want to,

595
00:23:27,115 --> 00:23:28,450
- it's a super uplifting song.
- Yeah.

596
00:23:28,658 --> 00:23:29,993
But he ruined it for me.

597
00:23:30,452 --> 00:23:31,787
What are you talking about?

598
00:23:32,120 --> 00:23:33,288
All right,
so I'm 12 years old,

599
00:23:33,371 --> 00:23:34,456
and I join the Glee Club.

600
00:23:34,706 --> 00:23:35,707
Glee Club.

601
00:23:35,874 --> 00:23:37,000
All my buddies
in the neighborhood,

602
00:23:37,084 --> 00:23:38,293
they gave me crap over it,

603
00:23:38,460 --> 00:23:39,836
but I don't care, because
for the holiday pageant

604
00:23:39,920 --> 00:23:41,296
we're doing <i>Do They Know
It's Christmas?,</i>

605
00:23:41,463 --> 00:23:43,882
and I was determined
to land that Bono part.

606
00:23:44,132 --> 00:23:48,470
<i>There's a world
outside your window</i>

607
00:23:48,804 --> 00:23:52,641
<i>And it's a world
of dread and fear</i>

608
00:23:52,974 --> 00:23:56,478
<i>Where the only
water flowing is...</i>

609
00:23:56,728 --> 00:23:57,979
<i>So my buddy
Derrick Lindmeyer</i>

610
00:23:58,063 --> 00:23:59,564
<i>is laying
into the Sting part,</i>

611
00:24:00,440 --> 00:24:02,275
<i>when out in the audience,
what do I see?</i>

612
00:24:02,776 --> 00:24:05,195
<i>My dad giving Scotty Kimball's
mom a foot rub,</i>

613
00:24:05,278 --> 00:24:06,488
<i>not even paying attention!</i>

614
00:24:11,243 --> 00:24:12,744
<i>I totally missed
the Bono part,</i>

615
00:24:12,828 --> 00:24:14,371
<i>and everybody made fun of me.</i>

616
00:24:18,291 --> 00:24:21,920
<i>And there won't be
snow in Africa</i>

617
00:24:22,003 --> 00:24:23,296
<i>this Christmastime...</i>

618
00:24:24,381 --> 00:24:26,091
I got no recollection of that.

619
00:24:26,174 --> 00:24:27,175
Yeah, well, I do, all right?

620
00:24:27,259 --> 00:24:28,718
And I got a lot of
other stories just like it.

621
00:24:28,885 --> 00:24:29,886
Science Fair, you left with

622
00:24:29,970 --> 00:24:31,096
Brian Higby's mom.

623
00:24:31,179 --> 00:24:32,681
Little League regionals, you
left with Mark Fitzgerald's

624
00:24:32,764 --> 00:24:33,932
mom and his aunt!

625
00:24:34,099 --> 00:24:35,934
Oh, yeah,
now that I remember.

626
00:24:36,184 --> 00:24:37,602
Yeah, yeah.
That went into extra innings.

627
00:24:37,686 --> 00:24:38,854
Know what I mean, kid?

628
00:24:39,020 --> 00:24:40,355
- No.
- Ah.

629
00:24:40,814 --> 00:24:41,898
Nice.

630
00:24:45,902 --> 00:24:48,071
Dusty! Dusty! Come on.

631
00:24:48,238 --> 00:24:50,574
He's gonna ruin Christmas,
Brad, I'm telling you.

632
00:24:50,740 --> 00:24:52,826
Look, I hate to hit
you with the tough love,

633
00:24:52,993 --> 00:24:55,245
but the only person
who can ruin your Christmas

634
00:24:55,912 --> 00:24:58,582
is looking back at you
from that mirror.

635
00:25:00,333 --> 00:25:02,002
- All I see is you, Brad.
- Oh.

636
00:25:02,252 --> 00:25:04,087
Okay. Well, sorry. Here. Here.

637
00:25:05,338 --> 00:25:06,339
There. There we go.

638
00:25:06,965 --> 00:25:08,466
- Still you, Brad.
- Is it?

639
00:25:08,633 --> 00:25:09,718
- Yeah, it's still you.
- Oh.

640
00:25:10,010 --> 00:25:12,679
Okay, well, look, I'm looking
at you, so I meant you.

641
00:25:12,846 --> 00:25:14,222
Well, I'm looking at you,
so I see you.

642
00:25:14,306 --> 00:25:15,348
Forget the mirror.

643
00:25:15,432 --> 00:25:17,350
You're the only one
who can ruin your Christmas.

644
00:25:17,517 --> 00:25:18,518
Don't look at the mirror!

645
00:25:18,602 --> 00:25:20,020
I'm still looking at you
if I look in the mirror.

646
00:25:20,187 --> 00:25:22,314
Don't worry about the mirror.
That was bad.

647
00:25:22,397 --> 00:25:23,690
- Forget the mirror exists.
- Okay.

648
00:25:23,982 --> 00:25:25,734
Let's just focus
on those kids

649
00:25:25,817 --> 00:25:27,652
and giving them a better
childhood than you had.

650
00:25:29,571 --> 00:25:30,655
- You're right.
- Yeah?

651
00:25:30,739 --> 00:25:31,740
It's about them.

652
00:25:31,823 --> 00:25:32,908
It's about giving them
a better Christmas.

653
00:25:32,991 --> 00:25:34,034
There you go.

654
00:25:34,117 --> 00:25:35,118
Yeah, and then we jam
that amazing Christmas

655
00:25:35,202 --> 00:25:36,203
right in his butthole!

656
00:25:36,369 --> 00:25:38,330
Yes, we do.
Wait! Whoa, whoa! No.

657
00:25:38,496 --> 00:25:39,497
Yes!

658
00:25:39,998 --> 00:25:42,000
You know, Dusty, I'm, uh, just
gonna take the mirror down.

659
00:25:42,083 --> 00:25:43,710
Then we don't have to
worry about it.

660
00:25:46,379 --> 00:25:47,380
Yeah!

661
00:25:48,173 --> 00:25:49,674
- Here we go.
- Here we go.

662
00:25:49,925 --> 00:25:51,676
Hey, where's your glove?

663
00:25:53,386 --> 00:25:55,222
No! Griffy!

664
00:25:56,681 --> 00:25:57,682
Excuse me.

665
00:26:00,393 --> 00:26:01,478
Griffy!

666
00:26:03,104 --> 00:26:04,397
Griffy! Hey!

667
00:26:05,232 --> 00:26:06,566
Griffy!

668
00:26:07,067 --> 00:26:08,568
Griffy!

669
00:26:09,236 --> 00:26:10,904
Watch out, honey!

670
00:26:16,701 --> 00:26:18,995
Is that Brad?

671
00:26:21,831 --> 00:26:23,583
- That's Brad!
- That's Brad.

672
00:26:25,502 --> 00:26:27,754
That boy never...

673
00:26:27,837 --> 00:26:29,506
Hey, come here. Look at this.

674
00:26:35,553 --> 00:26:37,847
Mmm. Honey.

675
00:26:37,931 --> 00:26:40,433
- Oh.
- Ow!

676
00:26:42,936 --> 00:26:44,354
Dusty, you like that, huh?

677
00:26:47,107 --> 00:26:49,150
Let me capture this
for posterity.

678
00:26:53,321 --> 00:26:55,490
The Nativity
is a big deal in Terre Haute.

679
00:26:55,657 --> 00:26:58,410
This is the Redeemer,
this is Abundant Life.

680
00:26:58,493 --> 00:26:59,494
Dad.

681
00:26:59,828 --> 00:27:02,289
Let's go, Pop-Pop.

682
00:27:07,168 --> 00:27:09,170
- It's real pretty.
- We'll take the pretty gun.

683
00:27:09,379 --> 00:27:11,464
No. No, no, no, no.

684
00:27:12,007 --> 00:27:13,133
We're not gonna
take that today

685
00:27:13,216 --> 00:27:15,176
'cause we are
a gun-free family.

686
00:27:15,343 --> 00:27:18,346
Good Lord. What has he
turned you into?

687
00:27:25,770 --> 00:27:27,355
- Ahh!
- Ha-ha!

688
00:27:28,356 --> 00:27:29,858
All right, throw it down!

689
00:27:30,025 --> 00:27:32,027
All right,
here it comes, Braddie!

690
00:27:38,742 --> 00:27:39,784
Brad!

691
00:27:46,166 --> 00:27:47,334
Hey, honey!

692
00:27:47,667 --> 00:27:49,002
Brad! Brad!

693
00:27:49,461 --> 00:27:51,546
You need a hat.
You're gonna freeze, babe.

694
00:27:51,755 --> 00:27:53,131
Oh, thanks, sweetie.

695
00:27:53,214 --> 00:27:54,758
You look cute.

696
00:27:54,841 --> 00:27:57,594
Hey, I want to talk to you.
I'm worried about your dad.

697
00:27:57,677 --> 00:27:59,554
Don't you think he seems

698
00:27:59,637 --> 00:28:01,097
slightly less chatty
than normal?

699
00:28:01,264 --> 00:28:03,600
You got to be shitting me.

700
00:28:03,683 --> 00:28:05,685
I mean, he shows up here
without your mom?

701
00:28:05,852 --> 00:28:08,021
Don't you think that's weird?
There might be a problem?

702
00:28:08,188 --> 00:28:09,397
With my mom
and dad's relationship?

703
00:28:09,481 --> 00:28:10,523
Yeah!

704
00:28:10,690 --> 00:28:13,276
What? They love each other
more than we do!

705
00:28:13,610 --> 00:28:14,694
Yeah.

706
00:28:14,903 --> 00:28:16,237
I brought you your hat!

707
00:28:16,613 --> 00:28:18,365
No, honey,
I didn't mean it that way.

708
00:28:18,448 --> 00:28:20,241
It's a huge compliment.
Come on.

709
00:28:20,325 --> 00:28:21,368
You got to understand.

710
00:28:21,534 --> 00:28:23,286
Brad! The Christmas lights!

711
00:28:24,412 --> 00:28:26,581
No, no, no, no.

712
00:28:26,956 --> 00:28:28,708
All the light strands
are connected.

713
00:28:28,792 --> 00:28:30,210
A terrible idea!

714
00:28:34,089 --> 00:28:35,548
None of these switches work!

715
00:28:37,759 --> 00:28:39,552
Heads up.

716
00:28:40,095 --> 00:28:42,263
Dad! What are
these levers for?

717
00:28:42,514 --> 00:28:43,556
Ow!

718
00:28:43,640 --> 00:28:45,266
- Sara!
- Stand clear!

719
00:28:45,350 --> 00:28:47,018
Brad!

720
00:28:52,107 --> 00:28:53,483
Brad, let it go!

721
00:28:53,566 --> 00:28:55,026
I don't want it to hit
your car.

722
00:28:55,193 --> 00:28:57,362
Let it go!

723
00:28:59,072 --> 00:29:00,907
- Tell him to let it go.
- Let it go!

724
00:29:11,126 --> 00:29:12,460
Are you all right?

725
00:29:14,087 --> 00:29:16,673
Look what you did
to the side of my car, man.

726
00:29:21,094 --> 00:29:23,012
Dusty, I'm so sorry.

727
00:29:23,388 --> 00:29:25,181
Honey!

728
00:29:30,437 --> 00:29:32,439
I'm not putting that
Santy Claus back up there.

729
00:29:32,605 --> 00:29:34,941
I don't want to put it back
on the roof, either.

730
00:29:35,567 --> 00:29:37,402
Why didn't he let go?

731
00:29:37,735 --> 00:29:39,904
Because he's an idiot!

732
00:29:52,375 --> 00:29:53,918
Son of a...

733
00:30:01,342 --> 00:30:02,343
Don.

734
00:30:03,178 --> 00:30:04,179
Don.

735
00:30:04,345 --> 00:30:06,181
Don, wake up. Don!

736
00:30:07,265 --> 00:30:09,058
Don, wake up! Don! Don!

737
00:30:11,686 --> 00:30:15,190
Kurt, are you okay?
Did you have a bad dream?

738
00:30:15,440 --> 00:30:16,774
Do you need to talk?

739
00:30:16,941 --> 00:30:19,277
Yeah, I need to be held.
My heart hurts. No!

740
00:30:19,611 --> 00:30:21,946
Did you touch the thermostat?
Did you turn it up?

741
00:30:22,113 --> 00:30:23,531
Well, of course not.

742
00:30:23,698 --> 00:30:25,241
Did somebody fiddle
with the thermostat?

743
00:30:25,325 --> 00:30:26,367
Yes! It's 85 degrees.

744
00:30:26,534 --> 00:30:28,995
85! Do you have any idea
how much

745
00:30:29,078 --> 00:30:31,039
even a few degrees
can impact the gas bill?

746
00:30:31,206 --> 00:30:32,916
Of course I do!
It's unthinkable.

747
00:30:33,082 --> 00:30:35,668
Dad? Kurt?
What's going on in here?

748
00:30:35,960 --> 00:30:37,086
Why is it so hot?

749
00:30:37,170 --> 00:30:38,796
Someone fiddled
with the thermostat!

750
00:30:39,005 --> 00:30:41,132
What? Who would do that?

751
00:30:48,348 --> 00:30:50,183
What do you think
you're doing?

752
00:30:50,391 --> 00:30:51,726
It's roasting in here!

753
00:30:51,935 --> 00:30:53,853
I like to sleep
with my window open.

754
00:30:54,020 --> 00:30:55,021
Hey, kid.

755
00:30:55,230 --> 00:30:56,731
Are you allowed
to touch the thermostat

756
00:30:56,814 --> 00:30:57,899
at your mom's house?

757
00:30:58,149 --> 00:30:59,859
Duh.

758
00:31:03,112 --> 00:31:04,364
What is going on?

759
00:31:04,864 --> 00:31:07,033
Adrianna! She turned up
the thermostat!

760
00:31:07,200 --> 00:31:09,077
Said she fiddles with
the thermostat at your place

761
00:31:09,160 --> 00:31:10,703
any time
she damn well pleases.

762
00:31:10,995 --> 00:31:13,414
Dusty, is that true?
Tell me that's not true.

763
00:31:14,791 --> 00:31:16,125
Oh, criminy, Dusty!

764
00:31:16,292 --> 00:31:17,627
You might as well
give her your wallet

765
00:31:17,710 --> 00:31:19,045
and your 401
while you're at it!

766
00:31:19,128 --> 00:31:20,213
Brad, do you let the kids

767
00:31:20,296 --> 00:31:21,422
touch the thermostat
at your house?

768
00:31:21,506 --> 00:31:24,842
What? No! The thermostat
is a sacred covenant.

769
00:31:25,009 --> 00:31:27,387
I can't believe
we're even talking about this!

770
00:31:27,470 --> 00:31:28,638
This is madness!

771
00:31:28,805 --> 00:31:30,765
Oh, God, even Brad's got
his house in order.

772
00:31:30,932 --> 00:31:32,267
Hey, you got no right
to talk, all right?

773
00:31:32,433 --> 00:31:34,060
It wasn't hard to keep me away
from the thermostat

774
00:31:34,143 --> 00:31:35,353
once you shipped me off
to military school.

775
00:31:35,520 --> 00:31:36,521
Kurt, you didn't.

776
00:31:36,604 --> 00:31:37,689
He was out of control.
He was a bedwetter.

777
00:31:37,855 --> 00:31:39,607
I was a bedwetter.
Were you a bedwetter?

778
00:31:39,691 --> 00:31:40,942
I was four years old!

779
00:31:41,109 --> 00:31:42,735
Okay,
everyone take it easy.

780
00:31:42,944 --> 00:31:44,404
It's not Dusty's fault

781
00:31:44,487 --> 00:31:45,947
that he lets Adrianna
walk all over him.

782
00:31:46,114 --> 00:31:47,991
She does not walk all over me!

783
00:31:48,157 --> 00:31:49,909
I can see
how being a stepdad,

784
00:31:50,076 --> 00:31:52,453
you might not feel
empowered to discipline

785
00:31:52,537 --> 00:31:54,038
someone else's child.

786
00:31:54,122 --> 00:31:55,790
Hey, quit your scoffing,
all right?

787
00:31:55,957 --> 00:31:57,625
And you two quit helping me.

788
00:31:57,792 --> 00:32:01,129
Look, Karen and Roger
spoil her to no end.

789
00:32:01,421 --> 00:32:03,256
It's crazy!

790
00:32:03,464 --> 00:32:05,216
And there's nothing
you can do. I get it!

791
00:32:05,300 --> 00:32:07,594
You're the stepdad.
You're screwed.

792
00:32:07,760 --> 00:32:09,429
That kid's never gonna
respect you

793
00:32:09,512 --> 00:32:11,055
unless you bring
the hammer down.

794
00:32:20,231 --> 00:32:22,275
What the hell was that, Brad?

795
00:32:22,358 --> 00:32:24,527
I know.
He's old school.

796
00:32:24,694 --> 00:32:26,696
I think you handled this
really well, Brad.

797
00:32:26,779 --> 00:32:28,615
I'm so proud of the way
you express yourself.

798
00:32:29,532 --> 00:32:30,533
Come here.

799
00:32:31,451 --> 00:32:32,952
Again? Really?

800
00:32:34,787 --> 00:32:36,122
Good night, Dusty!

801
00:32:36,289 --> 00:32:38,666
- Good night, Dad.
- Good night, Brad.

802
00:32:57,894 --> 00:32:59,729
- Jump! Jump!
- Come on, Griff.

803
00:33:00,063 --> 00:33:01,564
Jumpy, jumpy, jumpy!

804
00:33:02,148 --> 00:33:03,232
Casey's here!

805
00:33:03,650 --> 00:33:04,651
Hey, guys.

806
00:33:05,360 --> 00:33:06,361
Hey.

807
00:33:06,611 --> 00:33:08,404
Hey, Dylan, look.
Casey's here.

808
00:33:08,488 --> 00:33:09,530
You want to come French her?

809
00:33:09,864 --> 00:33:12,617
Yeah, you want to go do French
on your girlfriend, Dylan?

810
00:33:12,784 --> 00:33:14,786
Megan! Leave him alone.

811
00:33:15,119 --> 00:33:17,205
And where did you learn
"do French"?

812
00:33:17,372 --> 00:33:18,706
I'll go talk to him.

813
00:33:21,584 --> 00:33:24,003
Dylan? You okay, buddy?

814
00:33:27,173 --> 00:33:29,759
I just... I don't get
the whole girls thing.

815
00:33:30,093 --> 00:33:31,094
Oh.

816
00:33:31,302 --> 00:33:33,638
Girls, yeah.
Yeah, that can be tricky.

817
00:33:34,013 --> 00:33:35,390
But you know
who'd be really good

818
00:33:35,473 --> 00:33:36,683
in explaining that department?

819
00:33:36,849 --> 00:33:38,601
Your dad. Let me go grab him.

820
00:33:38,768 --> 00:33:40,645
No, Brad! I just want to talk
to you about this.

821
00:33:40,728 --> 00:33:41,729
Just you, Brad, please?

822
00:33:41,896 --> 00:33:43,898
Me? You sure you don't want
to talk to your dad?

823
00:33:45,191 --> 00:33:47,276
Oh, well, girls. Okay.

824
00:33:47,610 --> 00:33:49,445
Huh. Um...

825
00:33:49,779 --> 00:33:51,864
All right,
the girl talk. Um...

826
00:33:52,198 --> 00:33:54,367
You know, boys have a...

827
00:33:54,867 --> 00:33:56,494
A dingle, right?

828
00:33:56,577 --> 00:33:57,829
And girls have a hoo-hoo
or a whim-wham.

829
00:33:57,912 --> 00:33:58,955
Brad, I already know
about that stuff.

830
00:33:59,038 --> 00:34:00,039
You do?

831
00:34:00,123 --> 00:34:01,124
Yes. From school,
and it's gross.

832
00:34:01,207 --> 00:34:02,208
Perfect!

833
00:34:02,291 --> 00:34:04,585
I just want to know
what to do if I, you know,

834
00:34:04,752 --> 00:34:06,087
I like somebody.

835
00:34:06,254 --> 00:34:07,296
Oh. Right, well...

836
00:34:08,256 --> 00:34:10,007
You want to become
her friend first.

837
00:34:10,174 --> 00:34:12,343
You want to be that one
that she confides in,

838
00:34:12,510 --> 00:34:14,220
that she tells you
about all of her problems

839
00:34:14,303 --> 00:34:15,596
with the guys
she's actually dating.

840
00:34:15,763 --> 00:34:16,889
Got it.

841
00:34:16,973 --> 00:34:18,433
It's called the Friend Zone.

842
00:34:18,516 --> 00:34:21,644
And it's where
we Whitaker men thrive.

843
00:34:22,186 --> 00:34:25,022
We're the best in the biz.
Yeah.

844
00:34:25,189 --> 00:34:27,358
Here we are
in a wild frontier,

845
00:34:27,442 --> 00:34:28,943
full of majestic pines,

846
00:34:29,152 --> 00:34:30,945
and you two numbnuts
are sorting through

847
00:34:31,028 --> 00:34:33,489
a bunch of dried twigs
on a Rite Aid parking lot.

848
00:34:33,573 --> 00:34:34,657
You just can't go out
on public land

849
00:34:34,741 --> 00:34:35,783
and cut down a tree, Dad.

850
00:34:35,867 --> 00:34:38,494
Dusty, we are the public.
We own those trees.

851
00:34:40,788 --> 00:34:43,458
Oh, I get it. You need to
ask co-dad for permission.

852
00:34:43,624 --> 00:34:45,376
Oh, shut up. I know
what you're trying to do.

853
00:34:45,543 --> 00:34:46,627
What am I doing?

854
00:34:46,794 --> 00:34:47,879
Make it look like
I can't make a move

855
00:34:47,962 --> 00:34:49,088
without checking in
with Brad first.

856
00:34:49,255 --> 00:34:51,799
Yeah, that's what I'm doing.
Am I right about that, huh?

857
00:34:52,008 --> 00:34:53,843
Oh, God.

858
00:34:57,513 --> 00:35:00,183
And we own the paint
in the Friend Zone.

859
00:35:00,516 --> 00:35:02,685
And sure we're gonna
lose some. Doesn't matter.

860
00:35:02,852 --> 00:35:04,520
We're gonna lose a lot,
I'll be frank with you.

861
00:35:04,687 --> 00:35:06,105
Well, what do you know?

862
00:35:06,189 --> 00:35:08,858
Brad's having that
nitty-gritty talk for you.

863
00:35:09,358 --> 00:35:10,651
Must be nice to have someone

864
00:35:10,735 --> 00:35:12,195
to handle
the tough stuff, huh?

865
00:35:12,528 --> 00:35:14,530
And eventually
you'll keep in touch.

866
00:35:14,697 --> 00:35:16,699
You might even be invited to
their wedding!

867
00:35:17,116 --> 00:35:19,243
And their dad's like, "Brad,
what are you doing here?

868
00:35:19,327 --> 00:35:21,454
"Teresa never talks
about you!"

869
00:35:21,704 --> 00:35:23,414
And you're like,
"I'm invited."

870
00:35:23,498 --> 00:35:25,625
And he's like,
"I wonder about that."

871
00:35:25,792 --> 00:35:27,460
And you show them the proof!

872
00:35:27,543 --> 00:35:29,212
Always bring
the wedding invite with you.

873
00:35:29,504 --> 00:35:31,506
- Then they can't kick you out.
- Okay.

874
00:35:31,672 --> 00:35:32,757
But you'll be sad ultimately

875
00:35:32,840 --> 00:35:35,092
knowing that she's not
with you, and

876
00:35:35,384 --> 00:35:36,552
you want to
prepare yourself

877
00:35:36,636 --> 00:35:38,554
with, like,
a mixtape of sad songs.

878
00:35:38,763 --> 00:35:41,599
Anything from Chicago
is usually pretty good.

879
00:35:42,099 --> 00:35:44,310
<i>If you leave me now</i>

880
00:35:44,769 --> 00:35:48,773
<i>You take away
the biggest part of me</i>

881
00:35:49,106 --> 00:35:50,316
I don't really know that song.

882
00:35:50,900 --> 00:35:54,737
<i>Ooh-wee, no, baby,
please don't go</i>

883
00:35:55,530 --> 00:35:57,698
Wait! No, no, no! Dylan,

884
00:35:58,449 --> 00:36:00,076
that is the worst advice
anyone could give you.

885
00:36:00,159 --> 00:36:01,452
Listen to your dad, please.

886
00:36:01,786 --> 00:36:02,829
It's okay, Dad.

887
00:36:02,912 --> 00:36:04,205
We don't have to talk
about it.

888
00:36:04,372 --> 00:36:06,207
No, no, buddy, buddy,
wait, wait, look!

889
00:36:06,374 --> 00:36:07,792
Hey, this stuff
is all about confidence.

890
00:36:07,875 --> 00:36:09,043
You just got to believe
you're the best

891
00:36:09,126 --> 00:36:10,211
she's ever gonna find.

892
00:36:10,294 --> 00:36:11,504
You believe that to your core,

893
00:36:11,587 --> 00:36:13,047
and she will, too,
I promise you.

894
00:36:13,256 --> 00:36:14,298
But what if she doesn't?

895
00:36:14,382 --> 00:36:16,509
Whoa, buddy, you can't be
afraid of rejection.

896
00:36:16,676 --> 00:36:18,135
You'll never find love
if you're too scared

897
00:36:18,219 --> 00:36:19,512
to put yourself out there.

898
00:36:19,846 --> 00:36:21,013
Hey, Goggles?

899
00:36:21,180 --> 00:36:22,306
Mistletoe is your ticket.

900
00:36:22,390 --> 00:36:23,474
You walk right up to her,

901
00:36:23,558 --> 00:36:24,851
you dangle this
over her head,

902
00:36:25,017 --> 00:36:26,060
and then you slap

903
00:36:26,143 --> 00:36:27,436
your spaghetti suckers
right on her.

904
00:36:27,603 --> 00:36:28,855
I don't know
if that's appropriate.

905
00:36:29,021 --> 00:36:30,439
It's a time-honored
holiday tradition,

906
00:36:30,523 --> 00:36:31,649
Mr. War-On-Christmas.

907
00:36:32,108 --> 00:36:34,068
Then you give her a nice smack
on the caboose

908
00:36:34,151 --> 00:36:35,778
and tell her
what a lucky girl she is.

909
00:36:35,862 --> 00:36:36,863
Don't listen
to that part, all right?

910
00:36:36,946 --> 00:36:38,030
Yeah, don't listen
to that part.

911
00:36:38,197 --> 00:36:39,198
Look at me. Look at me.

912
00:36:39,365 --> 00:36:40,658
You want to be like Brad
and be in the Friend Zone,

913
00:36:40,741 --> 00:36:42,034
or you wanna be like Dad
and get in the end zone?

914
00:36:42,201 --> 00:36:43,744
This worked for me
when I was your age.

915
00:36:43,828 --> 00:36:44,871
You want to go for it, buddy?

916
00:36:46,706 --> 00:36:48,165
Come on, you can do this.

917
00:36:48,499 --> 00:36:53,504
<i>A love like ours
is love that's hard to find</i>

918
00:36:56,757 --> 00:36:59,760
<i>How could we let it slip away?</i>

919
00:37:00,261 --> 00:37:02,346
No! I like Brad's way more.

920
00:37:02,513 --> 00:37:05,516
I just want to be her friend
and listen to her problems!

921
00:37:13,232 --> 00:37:15,568
My tree, my tree,
my tree, my tree.

922
00:37:16,110 --> 00:37:17,236
My tree, my tree.

923
00:37:17,320 --> 00:37:18,321
Can I yell "Timber"?

924
00:37:18,404 --> 00:37:20,281
- Sure can, sweetheart.
- Yay!

925
00:37:20,364 --> 00:37:21,532
Is this okay?

926
00:37:21,616 --> 00:37:24,035
Are any of these trees
even gonna fit in the cabin?

927
00:37:24,201 --> 00:37:25,828
We're gonna cut off
the top 25 feet

928
00:37:25,912 --> 00:37:27,914
and chop the rest up
for firewood, Don.

929
00:37:28,080 --> 00:37:29,123
Oh.

930
00:37:29,206 --> 00:37:31,167
Now, this is
the Duster Buster I remember.

931
00:37:31,250 --> 00:37:34,629
A certified badass that makes
his own rules! Whoa.

932
00:37:35,129 --> 00:37:37,131
Go find a good tree,
would you?

933
00:37:38,466 --> 00:37:40,718
Boy, I don't know
about this, Kurt.

934
00:37:40,801 --> 00:37:43,137
Isn't it illegal to harvest
a tree from public lands?

935
00:37:43,304 --> 00:37:45,431
Oh, hell, yeah.
It's a federal crime.

936
00:37:45,598 --> 00:37:46,766
I tried to talk him out of it,

937
00:37:46,849 --> 00:37:48,768
but you know how stubborn
that kid can be.

938
00:37:48,851 --> 00:37:49,852
Okay.

939
00:37:50,436 --> 00:37:52,563
Dusty, look, I know
you're upset about Dylan,

940
00:37:52,647 --> 00:37:53,689
but I just...

941
00:37:53,940 --> 00:37:55,566
I told you, Brad,
I'm not upset, all right?

942
00:37:55,650 --> 00:37:56,859
We're co-dads!

943
00:37:57,026 --> 00:37:58,444
If he prefers
your terrible advice,

944
00:37:58,527 --> 00:37:59,612
fine, I'm cool with that.

945
00:37:59,779 --> 00:38:00,821
I just want to find
the perfect

946
00:38:00,905 --> 00:38:01,948
Together Christmas tree.

947
00:38:02,031 --> 00:38:03,032
Well, I just don't know if

948
00:38:03,115 --> 00:38:04,158
it's the best choice,
you know?

949
00:38:04,325 --> 00:38:05,493
Well, maybe we're not always
gonna do

950
00:38:05,576 --> 00:38:07,411
everything your way
every time.

951
00:38:07,703 --> 00:38:09,038
Trouble in paradise, fellas?

952
00:38:09,205 --> 00:38:11,207
- No, we're picking a tree.
- Just having a conversation.

953
00:38:11,707 --> 00:38:14,043
El Padre!

954
00:38:14,460 --> 00:38:15,461
Lookit!

955
00:38:15,628 --> 00:38:17,630
Hey, what, kids? What,
you find a dead squirrel?

956
00:38:18,047 --> 00:38:19,840
We don't have
to do things my way.

957
00:38:19,924 --> 00:38:20,967
- Really?
- Yeah.

958
00:38:21,050 --> 00:38:22,051
What about baseball snack?

959
00:38:22,134 --> 00:38:23,511
I just wanted to give out
Fruit Roll-Ups,

960
00:38:23,594 --> 00:38:24,637
and what's the big deal?

961
00:38:24,804 --> 00:38:26,973
No, I just feel like organic
fruit is much more nutritious

962
00:38:27,056 --> 00:38:28,432
than its rolled-up
counterpart.

963
00:38:28,599 --> 00:38:29,600
- Yeah?
- Yeah.

964
00:38:29,684 --> 00:38:30,768
And what about
Megan's diorama?

965
00:38:30,851 --> 00:38:31,852
You didn't want to use
any of my ideas.

966
00:38:32,061 --> 00:38:33,729
Your only idea
was the Bay of Pigs!

967
00:38:33,896 --> 00:38:34,897
But it's an important event

968
00:38:34,981 --> 00:38:36,065
- in our nation's history!
- It was bloody.

969
00:38:36,232 --> 00:38:37,525
You wanted her to do
green energy

970
00:38:37,608 --> 00:38:39,151
so you could look
like Mr. Perfect Dad.

971
00:38:39,318 --> 00:38:41,570
- I'm not Mr. Perfect Dad.
- You act like Mr. Perfect Dad.

972
00:38:41,737 --> 00:38:42,822
I'm not Mr. Perfect Dad.

973
00:38:42,905 --> 00:38:44,073
And we don't
have to do things my way.

974
00:38:44,240 --> 00:38:45,658
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.

975
00:38:47,410 --> 00:38:49,745
Okay. You don't think I can
operate a chainsaw, do you?

976
00:38:50,246 --> 00:38:53,582
Guess who got his woodlands
management badge in Webelos.

977
00:38:53,916 --> 00:38:55,918
I did! Brad Whitaker.

978
00:38:57,503 --> 00:38:58,504
Ah!

979
00:38:59,255 --> 00:39:02,675
Dusty, look at this one.
Perfectly symmetrical.

980
00:39:03,134 --> 00:39:04,135
Okay.

981
00:39:07,513 --> 00:39:08,848
Oh, yeah.

982
00:39:09,098 --> 00:39:11,017
Keep an eye out for rangers!

983
00:39:11,308 --> 00:39:14,562
I've got to pinpoint
a 60 degree angle top cut.

984
00:39:15,479 --> 00:39:17,481
That's what
I'm gonna do first.

985
00:39:18,983 --> 00:39:21,152
Oh, yeah!
She's cutting like butter!

986
00:39:22,528 --> 00:39:24,113
Hey, Brad, isn't that a...

987
00:39:34,248 --> 00:39:35,499
Hold it, hold it!

988
00:39:36,542 --> 00:39:38,044
Timber!

989
00:39:39,712 --> 00:39:42,048
Wow!

990
00:39:42,381 --> 00:39:44,175
Brad, you cut down
a cell phone tower.

991
00:39:44,258 --> 00:39:46,719
Why'd you cut down
a cell phone tower?

992
00:39:46,802 --> 00:39:48,512
No bars? No bars?

993
00:39:51,807 --> 00:39:53,225
- That was excellent!
- Get up.

994
00:39:53,392 --> 00:39:54,393
You really stuck
that landing, man.

995
00:39:54,477 --> 00:39:55,478
Would you get up?

996
00:39:55,561 --> 00:39:57,063
I'd give you a 9.2
on my card.

997
00:39:57,146 --> 00:39:58,147
Brad, get up.

998
00:39:58,314 --> 00:39:59,315
I think Brad's dead again.

999
00:39:59,398 --> 00:40:01,108
Oh, man,
you killed the poor bastard!

1000
00:40:01,525 --> 00:40:03,194
Brad, don't go into the light!

1001
00:40:03,360 --> 00:40:05,529
It's okay, sweetheart.
El Padre will bring him back.

1002
00:40:05,613 --> 00:40:07,031
- Stand clear.
- I got it, all right?

1003
00:40:07,114 --> 00:40:08,407
It's your fault
we're even out here.

1004
00:40:08,491 --> 00:40:09,575
You're getting in our heads

1005
00:40:09,658 --> 00:40:10,659
and starting static
between me and Brad.

1006
00:40:10,743 --> 00:40:12,119
There's plenty of static

1007
00:40:12,203 --> 00:40:13,662
between you and Brad already.

1008
00:40:13,829 --> 00:40:14,830
And you know what?
Deep down,

1009
00:40:14,914 --> 00:40:16,415
you want him dead, don't you?

1010
00:40:16,582 --> 00:40:17,583
You can say it.

1011
00:40:17,666 --> 00:40:18,918
We all want him dead.
I want him dead.

1012
00:40:19,001 --> 00:40:20,252
- Everybody does.
- What?

1013
00:40:20,503 --> 00:40:21,504
Come on, admit it.

1014
00:40:21,670 --> 00:40:23,714
Why don't you admit why you
invited yourself to Christmas?

1015
00:40:23,881 --> 00:40:25,341
Oh, well, why don't you
tell me, smart guy?

1016
00:40:25,508 --> 00:40:27,051
'Cause you knew I was back
here trying to be a good dad,

1017
00:40:27,134 --> 00:40:28,844
be around for my kids
the way you never were for me.

1018
00:40:28,928 --> 00:40:30,721
That's why you want
to crap all over it.

1019
00:40:30,888 --> 00:40:32,014
Get up, Brad!

1020
00:40:33,682 --> 00:40:35,184
Oh, my God, what happened?

1021
00:40:35,351 --> 00:40:37,019
You cut down
a cell phone tower, Brad.

1022
00:40:37,186 --> 00:40:38,687
You know, you're right.

1023
00:40:38,771 --> 00:40:40,106
I did invite myself
to Christmas.

1024
00:40:40,898 --> 00:40:42,566
But that's because
you never do.

1025
00:40:45,277 --> 00:40:47,530
I feel like I died again.
Did I die again?

1026
00:40:47,696 --> 00:40:49,031
A little bit. Come on.

1027
00:40:52,576 --> 00:40:54,578
Okay.
Our report's all squared away.

1028
00:40:54,745 --> 00:40:56,455
Yimmy, Bill,
thank you guys so much

1029
00:40:56,539 --> 00:40:57,748
for the understanding.
We really appreciate it.

1030
00:40:57,915 --> 00:41:00,084
I'm so sorry.
I'm truly embarrassed.

1031
00:41:00,251 --> 00:41:02,378
No, hey.
It was an honest mistake.

1032
00:41:02,461 --> 00:41:03,504
Okay, you're all set.

1033
00:41:03,754 --> 00:41:05,381
Okay, we'd better
get back to the site

1034
00:41:05,464 --> 00:41:06,507
and lock it down.

1035
00:41:06,674 --> 00:41:09,009
Hold on one second.

1036
00:41:09,468 --> 00:41:12,304
Is there any way we could
do better than $20,000?

1037
00:41:12,471 --> 00:41:14,807
Can't you reuse some
of the antenna equipment?

1038
00:41:15,141 --> 00:41:18,686
Sorry, no. These old 4G units
are obsolete already.

1039
00:41:18,853 --> 00:41:20,521
That's why you're getting
this one so cheap!

1040
00:41:20,604 --> 00:41:21,772
It looks really nice, though.

1041
00:41:21,939 --> 00:41:23,357
It sure does.
Hey, guys, keep it up,

1042
00:41:23,440 --> 00:41:25,025
it looks great.
Happy Holidays.

1043
00:41:25,192 --> 00:41:26,694
Happy Christmas, guys. Thanks.

1044
00:41:26,861 --> 00:41:28,195
Please tell me
you did not just spend

1045
00:41:28,279 --> 00:41:29,947
$20,000 on a Christmas tree?

1046
00:41:30,281 --> 00:41:32,867
$20,000.
"Can you hear me now?"

1047
00:41:33,742 --> 00:41:35,327
You want some eggnog?

1048
00:41:38,414 --> 00:41:39,748
- Mmm, yummy.
- Hey!

1049
00:41:39,999 --> 00:41:41,750
- I want some!
- Me, too!

1050
00:41:41,917 --> 00:41:43,419
Now, girls,
that's a grown-up drink.

1051
00:41:43,669 --> 00:41:45,337
Yes. Thank you, Karen.

1052
00:41:45,588 --> 00:41:47,214
So we're only gonna have one.

1053
00:41:47,339 --> 00:41:48,340
What? No, no, no!

1054
00:41:48,507 --> 00:41:50,509
There's rum in there,
so not any.

1055
00:41:50,718 --> 00:41:52,052
Aw!

1056
00:41:53,470 --> 00:41:54,972
Are you writing about me?

1057
00:41:55,431 --> 00:41:56,515
All right.
Somebody want to plug her in?

1058
00:41:56,599 --> 00:41:58,267
Yeah, I got it.

1059
00:41:59,894 --> 00:42:00,895
Cool!

1060
00:42:02,146 --> 00:42:03,480
That's weird.

1061
00:42:06,609 --> 00:42:07,943
Wow!

1062
00:42:23,292 --> 00:42:24,376
What do you think?

1063
00:42:25,794 --> 00:42:27,129
It's so pretty.

1064
00:42:27,296 --> 00:42:29,882
Well, it ought to be
at 1,200 bucks a foot.

1065
00:42:30,049 --> 00:42:32,051
Dad, we're lighting the tree!

1066
00:42:32,301 --> 00:42:33,719
- Where's my dad?
- Yeah, I thought it was

1067
00:42:33,802 --> 00:42:35,012
a little quiet around here.

1068
00:42:35,387 --> 00:42:37,389
- Pop-Pop? Pop-Pop?
- Don?

1069
00:42:39,058 --> 00:42:40,976
Is he still outside?

1070
00:42:43,729 --> 00:42:45,231
Dad!

1071
00:42:46,482 --> 00:42:47,816
Dad?

1072
00:42:48,859 --> 00:42:49,944
Dad?

1073
00:42:50,653 --> 00:42:51,987
Brad!

1074
00:42:52,154 --> 00:42:53,989
Dad! Where are you?

1075
00:42:54,156 --> 00:42:56,283
- I found him! Where are you?
- I don't know.

1076
00:42:56,492 --> 00:42:58,160
- Are you hurt?
- Oh, no, no!

1077
00:42:58,369 --> 00:43:00,955
No,
I just can't quite get up.

1078
00:43:01,538 --> 00:43:02,623
Oh!

1079
00:43:02,873 --> 00:43:04,250
Dad, don't move.

1080
00:43:04,333 --> 00:43:05,542
There's a pack of wolves
on you.

1081
00:43:06,085 --> 00:43:07,920
- Oh, is that what it is?
- Yeah.

1082
00:43:08,254 --> 00:43:10,422
I can feel something
tugging at my trousers.

1083
00:43:10,589 --> 00:43:13,133
- What color are they, Brad?
- They're gray wolves.

1084
00:43:13,300 --> 00:43:15,386
That'll be <i>Canis lupus.</i>
They're dangerous.

1085
00:43:15,552 --> 00:43:16,720
Really?
They look like you could

1086
00:43:16,804 --> 00:43:17,846
just reach out and pet them.

1087
00:43:18,013 --> 00:43:19,348
I kind of want
to pet them, Dad.

1088
00:43:19,515 --> 00:43:22,059
Now, Brad. Don't make eye
contact with the alpha wolf.

1089
00:43:22,226 --> 00:43:24,353
I already did!
Right in the eyes.

1090
00:43:24,520 --> 00:43:26,021
Don't show any fear.

1091
00:43:26,188 --> 00:43:28,148
I don't want to watch
the wolves eat you!

1092
00:43:28,315 --> 00:43:30,150
Breathe deep
and pull yourself together.

1093
00:43:30,317 --> 00:43:31,568
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

1094
00:43:31,735 --> 00:43:32,736
Hut!

1095
00:43:34,989 --> 00:43:36,657
Hut! Hurt!

1096
00:43:36,991 --> 00:43:38,659
Are you saying
"hut" or "hurt"?

1097
00:43:38,826 --> 00:43:39,827
Dad, what happened?

1098
00:43:39,994 --> 00:43:42,371
Oh, you know,
I saw the nicest tree

1099
00:43:42,454 --> 00:43:43,664
a ways off, and

1100
00:43:43,831 --> 00:43:45,666
I got a little off course.

1101
00:43:45,833 --> 00:43:47,459
I tried to call you,
but all of a sudden

1102
00:43:47,543 --> 00:43:48,585
my signal dropped!

1103
00:43:48,669 --> 00:43:49,670
Really?

1104
00:43:49,753 --> 00:43:51,755
I tried to find
my way back, but

1105
00:43:52,047 --> 00:43:53,799
at some point
I lost consciousness.

1106
00:43:53,882 --> 00:43:57,052
That's about when the wolves
must have come across me.

1107
00:43:57,386 --> 00:43:58,387
It's all right, fellas.

1108
00:43:58,470 --> 00:44:00,889
You didn't have to go
to any trouble. It's all good.

1109
00:44:06,562 --> 00:44:08,981
I'm sorry for all the hugs.

1110
00:44:09,315 --> 00:44:11,025
I kind of don't want
to let go.

1111
00:44:11,108 --> 00:44:13,027
I almost thought
I'd lost you out there

1112
00:44:13,110 --> 00:44:14,320
to those nasty wolves.

1113
00:44:14,486 --> 00:44:16,488
Do you have any idea
how much I love you?

1114
00:44:16,655 --> 00:44:19,825
Well, of course I do.
You tweet about it every day.

1115
00:44:19,992 --> 00:44:22,161
You know how much I love you,
too, don't you?

1116
00:44:22,578 --> 00:44:25,080
Your answer is right in here.

1117
00:44:25,914 --> 00:44:27,249
I can see it!

1118
00:44:28,459 --> 00:44:30,961
Okay, now that everyone
is accounted for,

1119
00:44:31,295 --> 00:44:33,213
can we please talk
about who is paying

1120
00:44:33,297 --> 00:44:34,631
for that monstrosity?

1121
00:44:34,965 --> 00:44:37,634
Well, you know, it was Dusty's
idea to cut down the tree.

1122
00:44:37,801 --> 00:44:38,802
Yeah,
and it was your idea

1123
00:44:38,886 --> 00:44:40,220
to cut down
the cell phone tower, Brad.

1124
00:44:40,387 --> 00:44:42,556
Great, so as per usual
we get stuck paying.

1125
00:44:42,723 --> 00:44:44,975
- Wait, what does that mean?
- I think it's a nice tree.

1126
00:44:45,142 --> 00:44:46,894
I don't know. Dylan's
retainer? Megan's flute?

1127
00:44:47,061 --> 00:44:48,937
What about Tae Kwon Do
that you signed them up for

1128
00:44:49,021 --> 00:44:50,230
and didn't even ask us about?

1129
00:44:50,397 --> 00:44:52,733
Yes, and who paid for the trip
to the aquarium last week?

1130
00:44:52,816 --> 00:44:54,109
It's a really nice tree.

1131
00:44:54,193 --> 00:44:55,194
So now we're
keeping score, huh?

1132
00:44:55,277 --> 00:44:56,278
Well, who paid for the parking

1133
00:44:56,362 --> 00:44:57,946
and bought each one of them
a blowup orca?

1134
00:44:58,113 --> 00:45:00,074
After we told them they
couldn't have a blowup orca!

1135
00:45:00,199 --> 00:45:01,200
Yeah, because
you were too cheap

1136
00:45:01,283 --> 00:45:02,284
to buy them a blowup orca!

1137
00:45:02,368 --> 00:45:04,453
Who crushed my car with
a snow blower? You did, Brad.

1138
00:45:04,620 --> 00:45:05,871
Who crushed my car
with a motorcycle?

1139
00:45:05,954 --> 00:45:06,997
Hello! You again!

1140
00:45:07,081 --> 00:45:08,082
Hey!

1141
00:45:08,165 --> 00:45:09,500
It's a beautiful tree!

1142
00:45:09,833 --> 00:45:11,627
It's beautiful, all right?

1143
00:45:11,710 --> 00:45:13,003
Okay, yeah.

1144
00:45:13,087 --> 00:45:14,296
Dad's right.

1145
00:45:15,297 --> 00:45:16,799
It's a beautiful tree.

1146
00:45:19,051 --> 00:45:20,052
Whoa!

1147
00:45:20,761 --> 00:45:22,179
Don, I'm sorry, I don't think

1148
00:45:22,262 --> 00:45:23,347
I'm gonna be able
to save the foot.

1149
00:45:23,514 --> 00:45:24,515
Yeah, that baby's coming off.

1150
00:45:24,598 --> 00:45:26,350
I'll need some morphine
and a bread knife.

1151
00:45:26,517 --> 00:45:27,851
Brad, hold him down.

1152
00:45:28,018 --> 00:45:30,145
Oh, no.
That's just my feet.

1153
00:45:30,312 --> 00:45:32,231
It's the mail carrier's curse.

1154
00:45:32,398 --> 00:45:34,650
Back when I used to
sleep with your mom,

1155
00:45:34,817 --> 00:45:37,027
I once scratched
her leg so bad

1156
00:45:37,111 --> 00:45:38,779
with a piece
of rogue heel skin,

1157
00:45:38,946 --> 00:45:40,614
it actually drew blood.

1158
00:45:40,781 --> 00:45:43,033
What do you mean,
used to sleep with Ginny?

1159
00:45:43,325 --> 00:45:44,326
What?

1160
00:45:45,536 --> 00:45:48,205
Oh. We sleep
in separate bedrooms.

1161
00:45:48,372 --> 00:45:50,791
You know how badly
I snore, Brad.

1162
00:45:51,291 --> 00:45:53,210
Boy, that is inspiring!

1163
00:45:53,502 --> 00:45:55,003
You know?
The way you're always

1164
00:45:55,087 --> 00:45:57,423
so considerate
to the other person.

1165
00:45:58,173 --> 00:45:59,174
Ugh.

1166
00:45:59,758 --> 00:46:01,844
I really want
to take this foot off.

1167
00:46:11,228 --> 00:46:12,229
Hey, sweetie.

1168
00:46:12,563 --> 00:46:14,064
You know, you might want
to close your window.

1169
00:46:14,148 --> 00:46:15,315
You know, since it's winter?

1170
00:46:15,482 --> 00:46:16,483
You're not my dad.

1171
00:46:16,650 --> 00:46:17,901
You know, I appreciate you
reminding me of that

1172
00:46:17,985 --> 00:46:19,236
every few hours.

1173
00:46:19,403 --> 00:46:20,654
But, you know, we're not
the only people here,

1174
00:46:20,737 --> 00:46:23,323
so maybe we set
the thermostat to like 75?

1175
00:46:23,449 --> 00:46:25,242
I mean, that's still
really toasty, right?

1176
00:46:25,325 --> 00:46:26,326
85.

1177
00:46:26,660 --> 00:46:27,744
Okay, well,

1178
00:46:27,911 --> 00:46:29,913
what if I counter you
at like 78?

1179
00:46:30,038 --> 00:46:31,206
And then you negotiate
with me, you come back

1180
00:46:31,290 --> 00:46:33,792
at like 83, and then
maybe we settle at like 80.

1181
00:46:33,876 --> 00:46:35,335
- What do you say to that?
- 81.

1182
00:46:35,419 --> 00:46:36,420
Deal!

1183
00:46:36,587 --> 00:46:38,172
Look at that. The two of us
are starting to see

1184
00:46:38,255 --> 00:46:39,256
eye to eye.

1185
00:46:39,506 --> 00:46:40,674
Thank you, sweetie.

1186
00:46:40,966 --> 00:46:42,050
Oh, thank God.

1187
00:46:42,342 --> 00:46:44,386
Oh, there's Brad
with some makeup cocoa

1188
00:46:44,470 --> 00:46:46,472
for being such a jerk.
Thank you.

1189
00:46:47,139 --> 00:46:49,141
- Brad! What are you doing?
- Oh, God.

1190
00:46:50,934 --> 00:46:51,977
Why would you do that?

1191
00:46:52,060 --> 00:46:53,061
Look what you made me do!

1192
00:46:53,228 --> 00:46:54,229
- I didn't do anything.
- I didn't make you do it!

1193
00:46:54,313 --> 00:46:55,647
I thought you were bringing me
hot makeup cocoa

1194
00:46:55,731 --> 00:46:56,899
and you just, like,
threw it all over yourself.

1195
00:46:57,065 --> 00:46:58,275
You almost burned me, Brad!

1196
00:46:58,358 --> 00:46:59,735
I wasn't bringing you
makeup cocoa.

1197
00:46:59,902 --> 00:47:00,986
Why not?

1198
00:47:01,069 --> 00:47:02,237
I would've said, "Here, bud,
some makeup cocoa."

1199
00:47:02,362 --> 00:47:03,363
I've been waiting
for my makeup cocoa.

1200
00:47:03,447 --> 00:47:04,448
I didn't know that!

1201
00:47:04,615 --> 00:47:06,909
If I knew you wanted
makeup cocoa, I would've...

1202
00:47:07,242 --> 00:47:08,243
81!

1203
00:47:08,410 --> 00:47:09,495
No, no, don't touch that!

1204
00:47:09,578 --> 00:47:10,579
I talked her down
from the high 80s.

1205
00:47:10,662 --> 00:47:12,331
I'm making progress with her.
This is good.

1206
00:47:12,498 --> 00:47:13,665
Oh, I thought you had
your house in order.

1207
00:47:13,749 --> 00:47:15,000
Look, don't you see?

1208
00:47:15,167 --> 00:47:16,502
We're doing
exactly what he wants.

1209
00:47:16,585 --> 00:47:17,836
We're letting things
out of the harbor!

1210
00:47:17,961 --> 00:47:18,962
- So you are harboring.
- Of course I'm harboring!

1211
00:47:19,046 --> 00:47:20,047
And so are you.

1212
00:47:20,214 --> 00:47:21,215
Harboring was working
just fine

1213
00:47:21,298 --> 00:47:22,508
before he showed up.

1214
00:47:22,674 --> 00:47:24,051
Let's get everything
back in the harbor

1215
00:47:24,134 --> 00:47:26,428
and let's harbor it all back
in and close up the harbor.

1216
00:47:26,595 --> 00:47:27,930
I don't know if I can!

1217
00:47:28,096 --> 00:47:29,598
Remember you said let's put
the focus back on the kids?

1218
00:47:29,681 --> 00:47:31,475
That was a great idea!

1219
00:47:32,309 --> 00:47:34,561
Fine. Harbor's closed.

1220
00:47:34,645 --> 00:47:35,646
Good.

1221
00:47:35,729 --> 00:47:37,481
But we're going halfsies
on the cell tower.

1222
00:47:37,564 --> 00:47:39,149
Fine, halfsies
on the cell tower.

1223
00:47:39,316 --> 00:47:41,318
Brad, are you okay?

1224
00:47:42,319 --> 00:47:43,320
Yeah.

1225
00:47:43,487 --> 00:47:46,031
- Did you make tee-tee in bed?
- No, it's cocoa.

1226
00:47:46,198 --> 00:47:48,033
Did your cocoa
make you tee-tee in bed?

1227
00:47:48,200 --> 00:47:49,743
You're sleepwalking.
Go back to sleep.

1228
00:47:49,826 --> 00:47:52,287
The big boy doesn't have
to be embarrassed.

1229
00:47:54,915 --> 00:47:56,750
How would I pee upwards?

1230
00:48:01,380 --> 00:48:02,714
72. 13.
1/

1231
00:48:11,098 --> 00:48:12,099
- Pretty good.
- Yeah.

1232
00:48:12,266 --> 00:48:13,475
Better than before.

1233
00:48:13,559 --> 00:48:14,935
Yeah, the skip
was really cool.

1234
00:48:16,645 --> 00:48:19,064
Hey. Do you mind?
Bowler's etiquette.

1235
00:48:19,231 --> 00:48:21,233
- What do you mean?
- It means you're crowding me.

1236
00:48:21,400 --> 00:48:23,068
What? You can't bowl
with me here?

1237
00:48:26,780 --> 00:48:28,031
That sounded like a strike.

1238
00:48:34,580 --> 00:48:35,914
How's your hearing?

1239
00:48:37,416 --> 00:48:39,251
- Dylan, come on, you're up!
- All right.

1240
00:48:39,418 --> 00:48:41,253
Let's go. Hey, come on.
You can do this, okay?

1241
00:48:42,212 --> 00:48:44,631
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
What's with the kiddie stuff?

1242
00:48:44,798 --> 00:48:46,008
- What? The rails?
- Yeah.

1243
00:48:46,091 --> 00:48:47,801
It's how the kids
learn how to bowl, Dad.

1244
00:48:47,968 --> 00:48:49,678
You learn by fearing
the gutter.

1245
00:48:49,761 --> 00:48:50,887
Like in life, Dusty.

1246
00:48:51,054 --> 00:48:53,265
Now, Kurt.
The rails help a young bowler

1247
00:48:53,348 --> 00:48:54,891
build a positive self-image.

1248
00:48:55,225 --> 00:48:57,144
Dylan, come here.

1249
00:48:58,186 --> 00:48:59,730
Do you want to bowl
with those sissy rails up,

1250
00:48:59,813 --> 00:49:02,357
or do you want to stand
and bowl like a man?

1251
00:49:03,734 --> 00:49:04,901
I don't need the rails,
I guess.

1252
00:49:04,985 --> 00:49:06,153
Attaboy!
I'm proud of you, kid.

1253
00:49:06,320 --> 00:49:08,155
Hey, I'm proud of you too,
big guy, all right?

1254
00:49:08,322 --> 00:49:10,073
Dylan's going
without the rails.

1255
00:49:10,240 --> 00:49:12,659
No rails?
Whoo! All right, Dylan!

1256
00:49:12,826 --> 00:49:14,828
Don't be afraid
to release it high.

1257
00:49:14,911 --> 00:49:15,912
Here we go.

1258
00:49:17,080 --> 00:49:18,415
Good try.

1259
00:49:18,665 --> 00:49:19,875
When he's up there
with the tears

1260
00:49:19,958 --> 00:49:21,209
and "I suck at everything"
business,

1261
00:49:21,293 --> 00:49:23,045
that's on you,
Mr. School of Hard Knocks.

1262
00:49:23,211 --> 00:49:24,630
Hey, better than him
living in your basement

1263
00:49:24,713 --> 00:49:26,214
in 20 years, Mr. Sissy Rails.

1264
00:49:30,510 --> 00:49:31,887
Come on, buddy.
Give it another shot.

1265
00:49:32,220 --> 00:49:33,805
Okay. New start,
new beginning. Here we go.

1266
00:49:38,935 --> 00:49:39,936
Yay!

1267
00:49:41,605 --> 00:49:42,606
Oh, yeah.

1268
00:49:53,992 --> 00:49:56,495
Are we certain
he understands the game?

1269
00:49:56,578 --> 00:49:58,830
He seems to almost be trying
to put it in the gutter.

1270
00:49:58,997 --> 00:50:01,083
I know. He needs to get
more height on the ball.

1271
00:50:16,765 --> 00:50:19,434
I hate this frickin' game!
It's so frickin' stupid!

1272
00:50:21,103 --> 00:50:22,646
Hey, everybody, check it out!

1273
00:50:22,813 --> 00:50:24,564
This kid's about to bowl
a perfect zero.

1274
00:50:24,690 --> 00:50:25,982
Hey, mind your business!

1275
00:50:27,859 --> 00:50:28,902
Hey, how do you think
this is gonna make him

1276
00:50:28,985 --> 00:50:29,986
feel about himself?

1277
00:50:30,153 --> 00:50:31,822
Well,
this is character building.

1278
00:50:31,988 --> 00:50:33,490
Even the ridicule.

1279
00:50:33,949 --> 00:50:35,701
- Come on, bud.
- Come on, Dylan!

1280
00:50:36,118 --> 00:50:37,619
It's okay.

1281
00:50:37,869 --> 00:50:39,538
I suck at everything!

1282
00:50:39,705 --> 00:50:41,790
I quit, I quit!

1283
00:50:44,167 --> 00:50:45,502
Hey. Hey, kid, listen.

1284
00:50:47,087 --> 00:50:49,923
We Mayron men
might not always show up.

1285
00:50:50,257 --> 00:50:52,259
I mean, we want to show up,
we intend to, but

1286
00:50:52,426 --> 00:50:54,177
sometimes we get trashed
the night before,

1287
00:50:54,261 --> 00:50:55,762
or we wreck a speedboat, or

1288
00:50:55,929 --> 00:50:58,432
hook up with some Emirates
flight attendants and

1289
00:50:58,598 --> 00:51:01,351
somehow end up
on a redeye to Dubai.

1290
00:51:02,060 --> 00:51:03,562
You know what I mean.

1291
00:51:03,812 --> 00:51:05,647
The point is, we may not
always show up,

1292
00:51:05,814 --> 00:51:08,483
but when we do,
we finish what we start.

1293
00:51:08,775 --> 00:51:10,861
Now you get up there
and grab those balls.

1294
00:51:16,825 --> 00:51:18,326
Come on, you got this.

1295
00:51:26,334 --> 00:51:27,544
Go, bro!

1296
00:51:28,003 --> 00:51:29,838
I'll take that.

1297
00:51:30,172 --> 00:51:31,673
I'll cover that.

1298
00:51:34,342 --> 00:51:35,677
Come on, honey!

1299
00:51:37,012 --> 00:51:38,764
- Come on, buddy.
- You can do it, kid.

1300
00:51:51,526 --> 00:51:53,028
Please. Please.

1301
00:52:08,960 --> 00:52:10,295
Whoo! I did it!

1302
00:52:13,131 --> 00:52:15,050
Thanks for believing in me,
El Padre!

1303
00:52:15,217 --> 00:52:17,886
You bet, buddy!
I knew you had it in you!

1304
00:52:20,055 --> 00:52:22,474
You're a winner!
You're a winner!

1305
00:52:33,360 --> 00:52:34,653
Hey, where were you guys?

1306
00:52:34,736 --> 00:52:35,946
We're almost at the front
of the line here.

1307
00:52:36,112 --> 00:52:38,657
We were at the Starbucks
checking out the local talent.

1308
00:52:38,824 --> 00:52:40,116
Cute little number
at the next table

1309
00:52:40,200 --> 00:52:41,368
was giving this one the eye.

1310
00:52:41,535 --> 00:52:43,119
And El Padre got a phone
number from the lady

1311
00:52:43,203 --> 00:52:45,956
who made the coffees.
We got free ones!

1312
00:52:47,958 --> 00:52:50,293
- I drink coffee now.
- What? Get in here.

1313
00:52:50,502 --> 00:52:51,837
Big jump!

1314
00:52:57,175 --> 00:52:58,468
Hey, honey,
are you sure you don't want

1315
00:52:58,552 --> 00:52:59,678
to go see Santa with the boys?

1316
00:52:59,761 --> 00:53:01,263
You were so excited.

1317
00:53:03,181 --> 00:53:05,767
Mom, Santa is so lame.

1318
00:53:06,434 --> 00:53:08,436
- Come on.
- He can hear you, you know!

1319
00:53:10,355 --> 00:53:12,274
You know, I'm sorry, um...

1320
00:53:12,941 --> 00:53:16,361
My daughter thinks that
your daughter is amazing.

1321
00:53:16,778 --> 00:53:18,113
Oh, that's sweet.

1322
00:53:19,281 --> 00:53:21,283
Which is cute,
you're right, but

1323
00:53:21,449 --> 00:53:23,869
sometimes when Adrianna
does certain things,

1324
00:53:24,035 --> 00:53:25,453
then Megan thinks
that it's okay to do it

1325
00:53:25,537 --> 00:53:26,788
because you said that...

1326
00:53:32,127 --> 00:53:33,128
Oh, my God.

1327
00:53:33,837 --> 00:53:35,505
Are you really
stealing right now?

1328
00:53:35,672 --> 00:53:37,382
Sometimes I shoplift
a little bit.

1329
00:53:37,465 --> 00:53:38,675
It's exciting!

1330
00:53:39,843 --> 00:53:42,512
No! I mean... Okay, yeah,
it's a little exciting.

1331
00:53:42,596 --> 00:53:44,180
My heart's really
beating out of my chest.

1332
00:53:44,347 --> 00:53:46,433
What if we get caught?
You got to put it back!

1333
00:53:46,600 --> 00:53:47,642
You're so obedient.

1334
00:53:47,726 --> 00:53:49,352
You're always following
the rules, you know.

1335
00:53:49,519 --> 00:53:50,604
Come on, Sara.

1336
00:53:50,687 --> 00:53:52,188
Have a little fun with me.
Relax.

1337
00:53:52,355 --> 00:53:54,190
I mean, I would love
to have a little fun with you,

1338
00:53:54,274 --> 00:53:56,693
but I just want you to know,
I am not obedient, okay?

1339
00:53:56,860 --> 00:53:59,321
- Then put this in your pants.
- Uh, no. No, thank you.

1340
00:53:59,487 --> 00:54:01,489
And don't touch my boobs.
It's weird.

1341
00:54:01,656 --> 00:54:04,075
Stop it!
I'm not going to shoplift!

1342
00:54:04,242 --> 00:54:05,660
- Why not?
- Because...

1343
00:54:06,119 --> 00:54:08,121
Because
you're about to see why.

1344
00:54:08,288 --> 00:54:09,789
- Pardon me, miss?
- Yes?

1345
00:54:09,998 --> 00:54:12,083
- Is this woman bothering you?
- What?

1346
00:54:12,375 --> 00:54:15,545
She's a little judgmental,
but she's fine. Thank you.

1347
00:54:15,837 --> 00:54:17,255
No worries.

1348
00:54:24,971 --> 00:54:26,640
Welcome to the North Pole!

1349
00:54:26,806 --> 00:54:28,600
And what do you want
for Christmas?

1350
00:54:34,814 --> 00:54:36,483
Oh, I didn't miss it. Hi!

1351
00:54:36,650 --> 00:54:38,652
Right there.
This is a great shot.

1352
00:54:38,985 --> 00:54:41,237
- Are you getting it, honey?
- Yeah, I got a good one.

1353
00:54:41,404 --> 00:54:42,572
That's a great shot.

1354
00:54:43,323 --> 00:54:44,324
Thank you, Santa.

1355
00:54:44,407 --> 00:54:45,492
- Oh, you're welcome!
- Hi, honey.

1356
00:54:45,825 --> 00:54:47,410
What about you, big brother?

1357
00:54:47,494 --> 00:54:49,621
I'm sure you've been good.
What's on your list?

1358
00:54:49,913 --> 00:54:51,665
I kind of want

1359
00:54:51,957 --> 00:54:53,375
a 20-gauge shotgun,

1360
00:54:53,458 --> 00:54:55,210
so I can go turkey hunting
with my El Padre!

1361
00:54:55,377 --> 00:54:56,878
What the heck?
Where'd he come up with that?

1362
00:54:56,962 --> 00:54:58,046
Did he just ask for a firearm?

1363
00:54:58,213 --> 00:55:00,298
Sure did! 20-gauge.
Kid knows his guns.

1364
00:55:00,465 --> 00:55:02,175
Kurt, we've already been
through this. Dusty and I...

1365
00:55:02,258 --> 00:55:03,885
Yeah, it is final. That's it.
It's not happening.

1366
00:55:04,052 --> 00:55:05,178
Really?
Because I don't remember

1367
00:55:05,261 --> 00:55:06,388
being part of that discussion.

1368
00:55:06,638 --> 00:55:08,431
Or am I just some
little obedient wife

1369
00:55:08,515 --> 00:55:09,724
who does whatever
the men folk say?

1370
00:55:10,141 --> 00:55:11,726
Yeah, that doesn't
seem quite fair to me.

1371
00:55:11,810 --> 00:55:12,811
Oh, piss off, Kurt.

1372
00:55:12,978 --> 00:55:14,479
Honey, he's talking
about a gun.

1373
00:55:14,813 --> 00:55:17,315
If I may, can I just

1374
00:55:17,649 --> 00:55:20,318
have a word
with my grandson?

1375
00:55:21,152 --> 00:55:23,196
I just want you
to fully understand

1376
00:55:23,279 --> 00:55:24,656
what you're asking for.

1377
00:55:24,990 --> 00:55:27,909
To take a gun
into the wilderness,

1378
00:55:28,243 --> 00:55:30,787
find an animal
living free,

1379
00:55:30,954 --> 00:55:32,914
and take away its life.

1380
00:55:33,081 --> 00:55:35,000
So that it can never
breathe or run

1381
00:55:35,917 --> 00:55:38,420
or play ever again. Now,

1382
00:55:38,753 --> 00:55:40,755
is that what
you really want?

1383
00:55:40,922 --> 00:55:42,132
Yes.

1384
00:55:42,674 --> 00:55:45,135
- No. I don't want to do that.
- Ah.

1385
00:55:45,218 --> 00:55:47,053
You have a good heart, Dylan.

1386
00:55:47,303 --> 00:55:48,972
I'll do it!
I'll kill a turkey!

1387
00:55:49,139 --> 00:55:50,807
Can I shoot one? Please?

1388
00:55:52,100 --> 00:55:54,102
I'll have one shotgun,
please, Santa.

1389
00:55:54,185 --> 00:55:55,854
And gobs and gobs of bullets.

1390
00:55:56,146 --> 00:55:58,231
No, no, no, cupcake.
No, I'm sorry.

1391
00:55:58,398 --> 00:56:02,068
No, the men do the hunting.
You ladies cook what we kill.

1392
00:56:02,527 --> 00:56:03,528
Excuse me?

1393
00:56:05,238 --> 00:56:06,906
Yeah, excuse you?

1394
00:56:07,240 --> 00:56:09,159
Here, turkey, turkey, turkey!

1395
00:56:09,325 --> 00:56:10,452
Be patient, sweetheart.

1396
00:56:10,535 --> 00:56:11,745
The decoys are right
around the corner.

1397
00:56:11,911 --> 00:56:13,121
This is nice, huh, Dust?

1398
00:56:13,204 --> 00:56:15,832
You and me, the fresh air.
Just like old times.

1399
00:56:15,999 --> 00:56:17,167
What do you mean
"just like old times"?

1400
00:56:17,250 --> 00:56:18,334
You only took me once, Dad.

1401
00:56:18,626 --> 00:56:19,627
Aw, jeez, I don't know.
Are you sure

1402
00:56:19,711 --> 00:56:21,463
this is a good idea, Sara?

1403
00:56:21,629 --> 00:56:23,715
Megan is a strong
independent woman.

1404
00:56:23,882 --> 00:56:25,925
If she wants to help thin
the wild turkey population

1405
00:56:26,092 --> 00:56:27,969
so that they don't starve
to death in the winter,

1406
00:56:28,136 --> 00:56:29,721
that is her right
by the Second Amendment.

1407
00:56:29,804 --> 00:56:31,723
Boy, you bought into that
real quick.

1408
00:56:31,890 --> 00:56:32,932
I mean, I think for Megan

1409
00:56:33,016 --> 00:56:34,434
this is less
about wildlife conservation

1410
00:56:34,517 --> 00:56:35,643
and more about bloodlust.

1411
00:56:35,810 --> 00:56:38,480
Looks like somebody picked
the wrong day to be a turkey.

1412
00:56:38,897 --> 00:56:41,316
Keep your elbow down
and cradle the stock, okay.

1413
00:56:41,483 --> 00:56:42,484
Yeah, I get it.

1414
00:56:42,567 --> 00:56:44,069
Can I shoot
the damn thing or not?

1415
00:56:44,235 --> 00:56:45,570
Yeah, that's the spirit.

1416
00:56:45,904 --> 00:56:47,405
Take a deep breath,

1417
00:56:47,655 --> 00:56:48,698
and then
squeeze that trigger

1418
00:56:48,782 --> 00:56:50,742
as you're letting it out.

1419
00:56:51,868 --> 00:56:53,828
Megan, are you sure
this is what you want to do?

1420
00:56:54,996 --> 00:56:55,997
Let's name it.

1421
00:56:56,081 --> 00:56:57,499
She's not gonna kill it
if it has a name.

1422
00:56:57,665 --> 00:56:59,834
- Yes! Uh... Gertrude.
- Sam? Tom?

1423
00:57:00,293 --> 00:57:01,628
Billie Holiday! No.

1424
00:57:01,795 --> 00:57:02,879
- Elijah.
- Elijah!

1425
00:57:02,962 --> 00:57:04,839
- Elijah, run home!
- Stand your ground, kid.

1426
00:57:04,923 --> 00:57:05,924
Save yourself, Elijah!

1427
00:57:06,049 --> 00:57:07,050
Take the shot, kid.
Take the shot.

1428
00:57:07,133 --> 00:57:08,343
No, Elijah has feelings!

1429
00:57:08,426 --> 00:57:09,636
Take the shot!

1430
00:57:11,262 --> 00:57:12,639
Oh, God!

1431
00:57:13,098 --> 00:57:14,099
Dad!

1432
00:57:14,307 --> 00:57:16,392
Oh, my God.
Honey, are you okay?

1433
00:57:16,643 --> 00:57:17,644
- Kurt!
- Dad, Dad, are you all right?

1434
00:57:17,727 --> 00:57:18,978
I'm okay. She just winged me.

1435
00:57:19,145 --> 00:57:20,480
I'm sorry, El Padre!
I'm sorry.

1436
00:57:20,647 --> 00:57:21,648
That's okay, kid.
I've been shot

1437
00:57:21,731 --> 00:57:23,149
worse than this
plenty of times.

1438
00:57:23,316 --> 00:57:24,651
Make your scarf
into a tourniquet.

1439
00:57:24,734 --> 00:57:26,402
Wrap it around his shoulder.

1440
00:57:26,736 --> 00:57:28,238
Lift his legs!

1441
00:57:28,404 --> 00:57:30,323
- You'll be fine, sweetheart.
- I'm gonna bleed out.

1442
00:57:37,956 --> 00:57:38,957
Wow.

1443
00:57:39,249 --> 00:57:41,751
Two for two.
Makes getting shot worth it.

1444
00:57:41,918 --> 00:57:43,253
Get the birds, Brad.

1445
00:57:43,419 --> 00:57:45,588
God! I don't know
who this child is.

1446
00:57:45,755 --> 00:57:47,090
You get that one.

1447
00:57:55,306 --> 00:57:56,975
What? I know, okay?

1448
00:57:57,267 --> 00:57:59,435
It's on me. I'm the worst mom
in the world.

1449
00:57:59,686 --> 00:58:01,020
I put a gun
in my daughter's hand,

1450
00:58:01,104 --> 00:58:03,106
and then
she nearly killed somebody.

1451
00:58:03,439 --> 00:58:05,525
She's gonna be scarred
for life.

1452
00:58:06,109 --> 00:58:07,193
Hi!

1453
00:58:07,360 --> 00:58:08,653
I just shot a turkey
and a man.

1454
00:58:09,320 --> 00:58:10,989
Guess which one's dead.

1455
00:58:15,910 --> 00:58:18,663
Okay, fine, maybe
she's a little too unscarred.

1456
00:58:18,746 --> 00:58:19,789
Jeez.

1457
00:58:24,669 --> 00:58:26,337
- You all right?
- Yeah, good.

1458
00:58:26,671 --> 00:58:27,672
All right. So, listen,

1459
00:58:27,755 --> 00:58:28,840
the doctor said everything is
gonna be all right.

1460
00:58:29,007 --> 00:58:30,633
He just wants to keep you
for a couple of hours

1461
00:58:30,717 --> 00:58:31,843
to watch your blood pressure.

1462
00:58:32,010 --> 00:58:33,678
I'm fine. Where's my pants?

1463
00:58:33,845 --> 00:58:35,680
Hey. Oh, I forgot.
Nothing ever hurts you.

1464
00:58:35,847 --> 00:58:37,098
Why don't we just round up
all the nurses?

1465
00:58:37,182 --> 00:58:38,183
We can bring them in here.

1466
00:58:38,266 --> 00:58:39,309
You could do some pushups
for them,

1467
00:58:39,475 --> 00:58:40,476
maybe bench press
the couch a little bit,

1468
00:58:40,560 --> 00:58:41,728
prove
you're still a tough guy.

1469
00:58:41,853 --> 00:58:43,271
Still tough enough
to lick you, Junior.

1470
00:58:43,354 --> 00:58:44,355
Was that a scoff?

1471
00:58:44,480 --> 00:58:45,481
I didn't scoff.

1472
00:58:45,565 --> 00:58:46,649
Yeah, I heard you scoff
just then.

1473
00:58:46,733 --> 00:58:47,775
All right, I scoffed. So what?

1474
00:58:47,942 --> 00:58:49,277
Why, because you think
you can lick me, right?

1475
00:58:49,360 --> 00:58:50,361
Oh, I never said
I could lick you,

1476
00:58:50,445 --> 00:58:51,446
but I could whoop you
for sure.

1477
00:58:51,613 --> 00:58:52,614
Oh, now we're talking!

1478
00:58:52,697 --> 00:58:53,865
Come on. Best out of
three falls, come on.

1479
00:58:54,032 --> 00:58:55,533
Hey, cut it out, okay? I'm not
gonna wrestle an old man

1480
00:58:55,617 --> 00:58:57,076
whose ass is hanging out
of his hospital gown.

1481
00:58:57,243 --> 00:58:58,745
Greco-Roman style. Best way.
Come on.

1482
00:58:58,912 --> 00:59:00,914
Hey, Great Santini, I'm not
gonna do this, all right?

1483
00:59:01,080 --> 00:59:02,707
- Cut it out. Get some rest.
- All right.

1484
00:59:02,957 --> 00:59:04,459
Hey!

1485
00:59:04,709 --> 00:59:06,544
That's one, candy-ass.

1486
00:59:06,711 --> 00:59:08,213
Oh, now you're gonna
get whipped, old man.

1487
00:59:08,296 --> 00:59:09,380
Come on. Bring it on.

1488
00:59:14,594 --> 00:59:15,637
Tap out!

1489
00:59:15,720 --> 00:59:17,263
Nah. I can keep going
all night, kid.

1490
00:59:17,347 --> 00:59:19,057
You hear that heart rate?
You can set your watch to it.

1491
00:59:19,224 --> 00:59:21,142
Oh, yeah. 'Cause ice water
only flows at one speed, huh?

1492
00:59:21,309 --> 00:59:23,311
That's right, pal.
Now go to sleep.

1493
00:59:23,478 --> 00:59:24,562
You know I came in to
say something nice,

1494
00:59:24,646 --> 00:59:25,688
but now you can forget it.

1495
00:59:25,855 --> 00:59:27,440
Huh. What nice thing?

1496
00:59:27,607 --> 00:59:28,942
No. Forget it.

1497
00:59:29,108 --> 00:59:31,152
You know,
when that gun went off,

1498
00:59:31,236 --> 00:59:32,278
I thought you were a goner.

1499
00:59:32,445 --> 00:59:33,529
There's something that
we never say that

1500
00:59:33,613 --> 00:59:35,823
one of us should say
before it's too late.

1501
00:59:37,784 --> 00:59:39,118
Yeah? Like... Like what?

1502
00:59:39,285 --> 00:59:40,328
No, I'm not gonna say it now,

1503
00:59:40,411 --> 00:59:41,996
but maybe
you want to say something.

1504
00:59:42,080 --> 00:59:43,081
I don't know
what you're talking about.

1505
00:59:43,164 --> 00:59:44,207
Oh, yeah?

1506
00:59:44,290 --> 00:59:46,542
Seems like you might want to
get something off your chest.

1507
00:59:46,709 --> 00:59:47,710
No. Nothing comes to mind.

1508
00:59:47,794 --> 00:59:49,045
But if you want to
say something,

1509
00:59:49,128 --> 00:59:50,296
I'm not gonna stop you
or anything.

1510
00:59:50,463 --> 00:59:51,506
No, I'm good.

1511
00:59:51,589 --> 00:59:52,715
But you might wanna
unburden yourself

1512
00:59:52,799 --> 00:59:54,592
before you bust that
frickin' machine.

1513
00:59:54,926 --> 00:59:57,262
Yeah. Well, if I was gonna say
something, and I'm not...

1514
00:59:57,428 --> 00:59:58,429
What are you gonna say?

1515
00:59:58,513 --> 01:00:00,056
But if I was, I might want to
tell you that I...

1516
01:00:00,223 --> 01:00:01,266
Hello?

1517
01:00:01,349 --> 01:00:02,433
Wait, it's Brad! Don't,
don't say it! Don't say it.

1518
01:00:02,517 --> 01:00:03,518
Knock, knock!

1519
01:00:03,601 --> 01:00:04,602
Time out on three,
okay? One, two, three.

1520
01:00:04,686 --> 01:00:05,937
Hey, Brad.

1521
01:00:06,521 --> 01:00:07,605
What's going on?

1522
01:00:07,772 --> 01:00:09,357
Hey.
Am I interrupting something?

1523
01:00:09,524 --> 01:00:10,942
- What? No, nothing.
- No, we're fine.

1524
01:00:11,109 --> 01:00:12,277
Why are you being so weird,
Brad?

1525
01:00:12,360 --> 01:00:13,444
Just seems
a little awkward in here.

1526
01:00:14,821 --> 01:00:16,572
Oh, gosh.
It smells like a bullfight.

1527
01:00:16,990 --> 01:00:18,408
So, look, guys,

1528
01:00:18,741 --> 01:00:20,618
I'm not here to tell you
I told you so,

1529
01:00:20,702 --> 01:00:21,744
even though I did.

1530
01:00:22,704 --> 01:00:23,997
I've just been thinking that

1531
01:00:24,080 --> 01:00:26,374
we've had a lot of tensions
as of late, and I thought

1532
01:00:26,541 --> 01:00:29,043
maybe we could use
a Dads' Night Out. Right?

1533
01:00:29,210 --> 01:00:31,462
Yeah.
So what are we thinking, Brad?

1534
01:00:31,546 --> 01:00:32,588
Strip club?

1535
01:00:32,922 --> 01:00:34,924
Even better.

1536
01:00:35,258 --> 01:00:38,761
Oh, look, it's a cute
tiny monkey on your back.

1537
01:00:43,099 --> 01:00:44,309
Give us all the money
in the drawers

1538
01:00:44,392 --> 01:00:45,893
and all the lollipops.

1539
01:00:49,897 --> 01:00:51,482
Guys, I can't keep up.

1540
01:01:01,117 --> 01:01:02,118
I'm gonna hit the head.

1541
01:01:02,201 --> 01:01:03,244
I'll get us
a couple more drinks.

1542
01:01:03,328 --> 01:01:04,329
Sure.

1543
01:01:04,412 --> 01:01:06,748
Hey, am I crazy or are
you guys having a good time?

1544
01:01:06,914 --> 01:01:08,374
I don't know.
I think we kind of are.

1545
01:01:08,750 --> 01:01:10,501
- That's wonderful, Dusty!
- Thanks, Don.

1546
01:01:11,377 --> 01:01:13,171
I told you
we'd rub off on you two.

1547
01:01:13,338 --> 01:01:14,881
In this room right now,

1548
01:01:14,964 --> 01:01:18,176
uh, there's a man who,
despite his advancing years,

1549
01:01:18,343 --> 01:01:20,511
is apparently
an improv ninja.

1550
01:01:21,262 --> 01:01:22,597
Brad, you didn't.

1551
01:01:22,764 --> 01:01:25,433
I did. I so did!

1552
01:01:25,683 --> 01:01:27,602
Don Whitaker,
ladies and gentlemen!

1553
01:01:27,935 --> 01:01:30,104
All right. All right.

1554
01:01:32,857 --> 01:01:34,275
You are the greatest.

1555
01:01:36,694 --> 01:01:38,446
Don!
Let's hear it for Don!

1556
01:01:39,280 --> 01:01:40,656
We're gonna play
a little "Arms Akimbo."

1557
01:01:40,740 --> 01:01:41,783
Do you know that one?

1558
01:01:41,949 --> 01:01:43,034
- Oh! Of course I do!
- Awesome.

1559
01:01:43,117 --> 01:01:44,160
They're gonna love this.

1560
01:01:44,535 --> 01:01:47,121
- Can somebody do my Velcro?
- Yes.

1561
01:01:47,455 --> 01:01:49,290
He's got
tiny little girl arms!

1562
01:01:51,167 --> 01:01:52,627
Okay.
We're gonna do a scene,

1563
01:01:52,710 --> 01:01:54,629
and we need some suggestions.

1564
01:01:54,712 --> 01:01:56,172
Can you suggest an animal?

1565
01:01:56,339 --> 01:01:57,673
- Raccoon!
- A panda!

1566
01:01:57,840 --> 01:01:59,592
Raccoon, good! All right.

1567
01:01:59,675 --> 01:02:01,511
And, sir,
what is your profession?

1568
01:02:01,677 --> 01:02:03,012
I'm a dermatologist.

1569
01:02:03,179 --> 01:02:06,015
And finally
we need a human relationship.

1570
01:02:06,182 --> 01:02:07,266
Oh! Father and son!

1571
01:02:07,350 --> 01:02:08,935
A healthy father
and son relationship.

1572
01:02:09,143 --> 01:02:10,645
Or how about a divorce?

1573
01:02:12,146 --> 01:02:13,898
Oh. Now you're getting
in the spirit, Dusty.

1574
01:02:14,107 --> 01:02:15,191
Yes. Okay.
We're taking "divorce."

1575
01:02:15,274 --> 01:02:16,442
That's all we need.
Give it up!

1576
01:02:16,609 --> 01:02:18,236
That's really dark.

1577
01:02:18,986 --> 01:02:20,029
Oh, come on, babe.

1578
01:02:20,113 --> 01:02:21,656
Just a little fun
before he gets here.

1579
01:02:21,823 --> 01:02:23,032
No. Stop it. I told you, okay?

1580
01:02:23,116 --> 01:02:25,576
No canoodling until
the divorce is finalized.

1581
01:02:25,743 --> 01:02:27,328
- It's not right.
- Oh, come on.

1582
01:02:27,578 --> 01:02:28,955
Knock, knock.

1583
01:02:29,247 --> 01:02:32,083
He has no idea
what he's walking into!

1584
01:02:33,167 --> 01:02:34,669
Oh, you're home!

1585
01:02:34,836 --> 01:02:36,003
Yes.

1586
01:02:37,046 --> 01:02:38,214
Where were you?

1587
01:02:39,841 --> 01:02:42,844
Uh... I took our raccoon
to the dermatologist.

1588
01:02:43,010 --> 01:02:44,303
He got two of
the suggestions already.

1589
01:02:44,387 --> 01:02:45,430
He's on fire!

1590
01:02:45,596 --> 01:02:48,266
Aren't you even gonna address
the strange man in your home?

1591
01:02:48,433 --> 01:02:50,935
Yeah, bro, don't you even
want to know who I am?

1592
01:02:51,519 --> 01:02:53,020
I know who you are.

1593
01:02:53,187 --> 01:02:54,939
Don, if you'll excuse me,

1594
01:02:55,106 --> 01:02:56,858
I think I'm gonna start
giving it to your wife.

1595
01:02:57,358 --> 01:02:58,359
Shut up!

1596
01:02:58,526 --> 01:03:00,486
Just shut up
with that kind of talk!

1597
01:03:01,446 --> 01:03:04,282
When we met on that flight,
I was really nice to you.

1598
01:03:04,449 --> 01:03:06,409
I listened to you
tell your stupid story

1599
01:03:06,492 --> 01:03:08,453
over and over again, and

1600
01:03:08,703 --> 01:03:10,788
I complimented your hat!

1601
01:03:14,041 --> 01:03:16,419
- Brad, we have to stop this.
- He's killing!

1602
01:03:16,502 --> 01:03:17,712
Don't you see
what's happening?

1603
01:03:17,879 --> 01:03:19,881
I do. I see a room of people
laughing at my father.

1604
01:03:19,964 --> 01:03:20,965
- It's amazing.
- Okay.

1605
01:03:21,257 --> 01:03:24,260
- Have some water.
- No, I don't want water.

1606
01:03:27,138 --> 01:03:28,139
Oh!

1607
01:03:28,514 --> 01:03:31,434
I don't want water!
I want my wife back.

1608
01:03:31,726 --> 01:03:35,438
And I want our Sunday brunches
at the Cracker Barrel.

1609
01:03:35,521 --> 01:03:36,564
Braddie, we've got to get him
off the stage.

1610
01:03:37,773 --> 01:03:40,610
All you needed was somebody
to listen to you, and

1611
01:03:41,777 --> 01:03:43,446
all I do is talk.

1612
01:03:43,779 --> 01:03:44,864
On and on and on.

1613
01:03:44,947 --> 01:03:46,866
When am I ever gonna learn
to shut my

1614
01:03:47,033 --> 01:03:48,743
big fat mouth?

1615
01:03:48,826 --> 01:03:49,827
Ooh.

1616
01:03:50,369 --> 01:03:51,787
Oh, Ginny.

1617
01:03:53,623 --> 01:03:54,624
Ginny.

1618
01:03:55,416 --> 01:03:57,084
My sweet Ginny.

1619
01:03:57,418 --> 01:03:59,754
Why is he using
my mom's real name?

1620
01:04:02,173 --> 01:04:03,508
Hey, Dad?

1621
01:04:04,342 --> 01:04:05,927
Is this true?

1622
01:04:07,637 --> 01:04:09,472
Are you and Mom divorced?

1623
01:04:11,557 --> 01:04:13,476
I wanted to tell you, Brad.

1624
01:04:17,230 --> 01:04:20,107
Son, you're home
from summer camp!

1625
01:04:21,609 --> 01:04:24,612
I don't go to summer camp,
I'm a grown man. Okay?

1626
01:04:29,408 --> 01:04:31,827
Why are you laughing?
I'm not part of this! Okay?

1627
01:04:31,994 --> 01:04:33,621
You are a part of this family,

1628
01:04:33,704 --> 01:04:35,039
and you will respect
your parents.

1629
01:04:35,122 --> 01:04:36,207
- Yeah.
- Shut up!

1630
01:04:36,290 --> 01:04:37,333
- Brad.
- Just shut up.

1631
01:04:37,416 --> 01:04:38,459
Let me out of this bit!

1632
01:04:38,793 --> 01:04:40,711
What about him?
Is he still around?

1633
01:04:40,878 --> 01:04:42,672
Do I have a stepdad?

1634
01:04:44,382 --> 01:04:47,552
Stop doing that to me!
I'm a paying customer!

1635
01:04:48,219 --> 01:04:49,720
Brad, let's go.

1636
01:04:50,721 --> 01:04:52,431
Come on.

1637
01:05:01,691 --> 01:05:03,859
Will you please just go
out there and talk to him?

1638
01:05:04,318 --> 01:05:06,904
He won't talk to me,
and I don't blame him.

1639
01:05:08,030 --> 01:05:10,199
You know, it's not really
all your fault.

1640
01:05:11,409 --> 01:05:12,910
You can't blame Dusty.

1641
01:05:13,077 --> 01:05:14,829
He couldn't have known
about Ginny and me

1642
01:05:14,912 --> 01:05:16,747
when he made that
improv suggestion.

1643
01:05:19,041 --> 01:05:21,544
- You did know!
- It was pretty obvious, Don.

1644
01:05:21,711 --> 01:05:23,212
A guy your age either joins
an improv group

1645
01:05:23,296 --> 01:05:24,422
because his wife left him,

1646
01:05:24,505 --> 01:05:25,506
or his wife left him

1647
01:05:25,590 --> 01:05:26,632
because he joined
an improv group.

1648
01:05:26,716 --> 01:05:29,218
- So you did it on purpose?
- No! Well...

1649
01:05:29,635 --> 01:05:31,137
Well, yeah. All right? I did.

1650
01:05:31,304 --> 01:05:32,346
You and Brad are
all lovey-dovey

1651
01:05:32,430 --> 01:05:33,472
and smug
about your relationship.

1652
01:05:33,556 --> 01:05:34,974
I mean, you make out
every chance you get.

1653
01:05:35,141 --> 01:05:36,475
Meanwhile,
my dad's ditching out on me.

1654
01:05:36,684 --> 01:05:38,311
Maybe I got a little jealous,
all right?

1655
01:05:38,477 --> 01:05:39,520
Look, I didn't think
you'd freak out

1656
01:05:39,604 --> 01:05:42,148
and spill your guts to
a room full of drunken skiers!

1657
01:05:42,315 --> 01:05:44,191
- Hey. What is wrong with you?
- What? I didn't...

1658
01:05:44,358 --> 01:05:45,693
Go out there
and fix this right now.

1659
01:05:45,776 --> 01:05:46,777
- Go!
- All right.

1660
01:05:51,824 --> 01:05:53,242
Are you serious?

1661
01:05:53,409 --> 01:05:54,827
I'm keeping this.

1662
01:06:17,099 --> 01:06:18,351
Are you okay?

1663
01:06:19,810 --> 01:06:20,811
Uh...

1664
01:06:21,562 --> 01:06:23,230
My parents are divorced.

1665
01:06:23,397 --> 01:06:25,024
Oh. Mine, too.

1666
01:06:25,399 --> 01:06:26,400
Sucks.

1667
01:06:26,984 --> 01:06:29,320
- Yeah.
- I think it was my fault.

1668
01:06:29,945 --> 01:06:33,366
- Was yours your fault, too?
- I don't know. I hope not.

1669
01:06:33,532 --> 01:06:35,618
I just found out last night.
When did you find out?

1670
01:06:35,785 --> 01:06:38,204
- I was a baby.
- Oh, when you were a baby?

1671
01:06:38,704 --> 01:06:41,207
Maybe it was your fault.
Were you a difficult baby?

1672
01:06:41,374 --> 01:06:43,042
Um, I don't know.

1673
01:06:43,209 --> 01:06:44,543
You know what?
Your lack of specifics

1674
01:06:44,627 --> 01:06:46,379
leads me to believe
it was your fault.

1675
01:06:46,545 --> 01:06:48,714
No, no, no! You were not
a difficult baby, sweetheart.

1676
01:06:48,881 --> 01:06:50,633
Brad, dude,
what are you telling the kid?

1677
01:06:50,800 --> 01:06:53,052
Come on, man. I know
you're upset about last night.

1678
01:06:53,219 --> 01:06:54,720
All right? I'm sorry
about what happened, okay?

1679
01:06:54,887 --> 01:06:56,097
I didn't mean to give that
improv suggestion.

1680
01:06:56,180 --> 01:06:58,015
It just...
It just kind of slipped out.

1681
01:06:59,392 --> 01:07:01,310
Know what, Dusty? It's okay.

1682
01:07:01,394 --> 01:07:02,395
- Really?
- Mmm-hmm. Yeah.

1683
01:07:02,561 --> 01:07:03,562
Oh. Thanks, Brad.

1684
01:07:03,646 --> 01:07:04,730
Look, why don't you come in
and talk to Don?

1685
01:07:04,814 --> 01:07:05,856
He's feeling a little...

1686
01:07:05,940 --> 01:07:07,817
Oh, my gosh.
I wonder who that could be?

1687
01:07:08,234 --> 01:07:10,152
Ooh, what a nice truck!

1688
01:07:18,119 --> 01:07:19,120
Daddy!

1689
01:07:19,620 --> 01:07:23,082
- What are you doing here?
- Come on. What am I doing?

1690
01:07:23,249 --> 01:07:25,584
I want to celebrate Christmas
with my perfect little girl.

1691
01:07:25,751 --> 01:07:26,961
Don't you want to
spend the holidays

1692
01:07:27,044 --> 01:07:28,838
with your one true real dad?

1693
01:07:29,004 --> 01:07:30,339
Yeah, come on!

1694
01:07:30,506 --> 01:07:31,799
- Let's come see the cabin.
- Hey, Roger.

1695
01:07:31,882 --> 01:07:33,759
It's so cool!

1696
01:07:35,678 --> 01:07:36,762
Come on, hurry.
You're going too slow.

1697
01:07:36,846 --> 01:07:37,847
I'm coming, sweetheart.

1698
01:07:38,389 --> 01:07:40,641
You invite him all the way up
here just to get back at me?

1699
01:07:40,808 --> 01:07:41,934
Yeah, I did.

1700
01:07:43,936 --> 01:07:46,689
- Bye, Kurt! Call me!
- Yeah, next time I'm in.

1701
01:07:46,939 --> 01:07:48,607
That's her dad, yeah?

1702
01:07:48,691 --> 01:07:50,192
Uh-huh.

1703
01:07:51,360 --> 01:07:52,737
And you invited him,
too, didn't you?

1704
01:07:52,820 --> 01:07:54,155
I sure did, yep.

1705
01:07:54,321 --> 01:07:55,573
I don't know what I missed,

1706
01:07:55,656 --> 01:07:58,325
but this is getting good,
boys.

1707
01:07:59,452 --> 01:08:01,120
- I like your style, Brad.
- Hey, hey, hey.

1708
01:08:04,248 --> 01:08:05,708
You're opening up
the harbor, Brad.

1709
01:08:05,916 --> 01:08:08,252
Oh. The harbor is wide open,
and it's Fleet Week!

1710
01:08:08,335 --> 01:08:09,378
All right, good.
'Cause I got a few boats

1711
01:08:09,462 --> 01:08:10,463
that want to set sail.

1712
01:08:10,546 --> 01:08:11,589
Yeah, good. So do I.

1713
01:08:11,797 --> 01:08:13,132
You favor little Griffy
over my kids.

1714
01:08:13,215 --> 01:08:14,300
What? I do not!

1715
01:08:14,467 --> 01:08:15,593
He gets to sleep in your bed
all the time.

1716
01:08:15,676 --> 01:08:17,219
Megan and Dylan never get to.

1717
01:08:17,386 --> 01:08:18,763
You want them to sleep
in my bed with me?

1718
01:08:18,846 --> 01:08:20,723
God, no!
Don't ever think about it!

1719
01:08:20,890 --> 01:08:22,141
I'm not thinking about it!
You brought it up.

1720
01:08:22,224 --> 01:08:23,267
Good! You better not.

1721
01:08:23,434 --> 01:08:24,435
- Shut up!
- Hey, you shut up.

1722
01:08:24,602 --> 01:08:26,187
- You shut up!
- No, you shut up!

1723
01:08:26,395 --> 01:08:27,480
Okay. Well, he's not gonna be
part of that

1724
01:08:27,563 --> 01:08:28,647
special thing
we got planned tonight,

1725
01:08:28,814 --> 01:08:30,399
if that's what
you're thinking.

1726
01:08:30,566 --> 01:08:31,609
Oh, yeah?
So you're gonna tell Adrianna

1727
01:08:31,692 --> 01:08:33,235
that everyone's invited
to that special thing

1728
01:08:33,319 --> 01:08:34,653
we have planned for tonight,

1729
01:08:34,820 --> 01:08:36,572
except her dad.

1730
01:09:12,983 --> 01:09:16,320
Hey. Five more minutes
and I get to be Joseph.

1731
01:09:16,487 --> 01:09:19,031
You're not the right type
to play Jesus' dad, Brad.

1732
01:09:19,240 --> 01:09:21,951
He wasn't Jesus' dad,
he was Jesus' stepdad.

1733
01:09:22,243 --> 01:09:23,911
And I'm exactly
the right type.

1734
01:09:24,954 --> 01:09:26,038
You'd better stop hitting me

1735
01:09:26,121 --> 01:09:27,456
with that shepherd stick,
Brad. I'm warning you.

1736
01:09:27,623 --> 01:09:29,458
Brad's right.
Let him be Joseph.

1737
01:09:29,625 --> 01:09:30,668
Thank you, Roger,
I appreciate that.

1738
01:09:30,751 --> 01:09:32,294
It's Brad's turn, Dusty.

1739
01:09:32,461 --> 01:09:34,129
Dad, don't break character.

1740
01:09:34,213 --> 01:09:35,464
And stop trying to
butter me up.

1741
01:09:35,631 --> 01:09:38,217
- Can we show some decorum?
- I'm showing decorum.

1742
01:09:38,384 --> 01:09:40,511
Shh! You guys, zip it!
You're gonna wake Baby Jesus.

1743
01:09:44,181 --> 01:09:45,349
That's it. Give me the beard.

1744
01:09:45,432 --> 01:09:46,684
Don't touch
my Joseph beard, Brad!

1745
01:09:46,851 --> 01:09:48,352
- Give him the beard!
- Dad, stay out of it!

1746
01:09:48,519 --> 01:09:49,645
Can we have some respect
for the Nativity?

1747
01:09:49,728 --> 01:09:50,896
Cut it out!

1748
01:09:51,397 --> 01:09:53,983
This is stupid.
I don't even get it.

1749
01:09:54,358 --> 01:09:57,027
Why go on a trip when
Mary's about to have a baby?

1750
01:09:57,194 --> 01:09:58,445
What's so damn important

1751
01:09:58,529 --> 01:10:00,698
you got to go to Bethlehem
in the middle of the night?

1752
01:10:00,781 --> 01:10:01,782
There was a census, okay?

1753
01:10:01,866 --> 01:10:02,992
We covered that
in Sunday School.

1754
01:10:03,284 --> 01:10:04,994
Megan, what is going...

1755
01:10:05,953 --> 01:10:07,621
Did you get into the eggnog?

1756
01:10:07,788 --> 01:10:08,914
Hey. Who's up for some IHOP?

1757
01:10:08,998 --> 01:10:10,708
Oh, yeah,
that kid's pickled all right.

1758
01:10:10,875 --> 01:10:12,835
Mom, you're pretty.
Can we go to IHOP?

1759
01:10:13,544 --> 01:10:14,587
I'm sorry, folks.

1760
01:10:14,670 --> 01:10:16,547
Having some
technical difficulties.

1761
01:10:16,714 --> 01:10:19,466
Great, Dad. Now
you've broken the fourth wall!

1762
01:10:19,800 --> 01:10:21,302
None of it's real, folks.

1763
01:10:21,468 --> 01:10:24,805
I want to go wait in the car.
Give me the keys, Braaad!

1764
01:10:25,014 --> 01:10:27,182
No, I am not giving you
the keys to the car,

1765
01:10:27,266 --> 01:10:29,351
because you're drunk
and you're a child.

1766
01:10:29,518 --> 01:10:33,856
Nobody likes your dumb,
stupid Brad voice.

1767
01:10:34,106 --> 01:10:35,774
And you smell like pumpkins!

1768
01:10:35,941 --> 01:10:38,360
- And you're a mean drunk.
- Kid's got an arm.

1769
01:10:38,527 --> 01:10:40,696
Drunk nine-year-old.
Real nice parenting.

1770
01:10:41,155 --> 01:10:43,115
You better watch it, Roger.

1771
01:10:45,409 --> 01:10:46,785
Adrianna!
Are you okay, sweetheart?

1772
01:10:46,869 --> 01:10:47,912
Is she okay? Is she...
What is she...

1773
01:10:49,872 --> 01:10:51,165
Oh. What a shock.

1774
01:10:51,248 --> 01:10:52,875
Now we know
where Megan got the eggnog.

1775
01:10:53,042 --> 01:10:54,835
You always assume
she's the bad influence.

1776
01:10:54,919 --> 01:10:57,212
Maybe your daughter plied
my daughter with alcohol.

1777
01:10:57,379 --> 01:10:58,380
Maybe your daughter's that way

1778
01:10:58,464 --> 01:11:00,132
because her mother is
a shoplifter.

1779
01:11:00,299 --> 01:11:01,926
Shoplifterrr.

1780
01:11:02,635 --> 01:11:04,637
Sara, we've been working on
the shoplifting thing, okay?

1781
01:11:04,803 --> 01:11:05,930
But that has nothing to do
with Adrianna

1782
01:11:06,013 --> 01:11:07,222
being such a little nightmare
all the time.

1783
01:11:07,389 --> 01:11:08,641
My daughter is not
a nightmare!

1784
01:11:08,724 --> 01:11:09,725
Come on, Adrianna.

1785
01:11:09,892 --> 01:11:11,644
No, sweetheart,
I didn't mean that. Honey!

1786
01:11:11,727 --> 01:11:12,728
Hey.

1787
01:11:13,145 --> 01:11:15,564
- What'd you call my daughter?
- He called her a nightmare.

1788
01:11:15,731 --> 01:11:17,524
Hey. I'm a lot of things,
but I'm not a heathen.

1789
01:11:17,608 --> 01:11:18,734
Let's take this outside.

1790
01:11:18,901 --> 01:11:20,277
Yeah, let's step outside
the manger.

1791
01:11:20,361 --> 01:11:21,403
He called her a nightmare.

1792
01:11:21,570 --> 01:11:23,113
- Here we go.
- Now, now, boys,

1793
01:11:23,489 --> 01:11:25,157
we can't just leave!

1794
01:11:25,324 --> 01:11:28,035
Joseph and the Innkeeper
rumble outside the manger!

1795
01:11:28,202 --> 01:11:29,328
Make the first move,
Innkeeper.

1796
01:11:29,411 --> 01:11:30,663
Kick his ass, Joseph!

1797
01:11:30,829 --> 01:11:32,915
We are not going to do this
in front of the children!

1798
01:11:32,998 --> 01:11:35,167
Now, what kind of fathers
are you, anyway?

1799
01:11:35,334 --> 01:11:36,627
Oh, that's rich!

1800
01:11:36,710 --> 01:11:39,630
Coming from a guy who lies
to his son for six months.

1801
01:11:39,797 --> 01:11:41,048
Maybe that's why
everyone thinks

1802
01:11:41,131 --> 01:11:42,466
your stories
are so "delightful,"

1803
01:11:42,549 --> 01:11:44,093
because they're all lies!

1804
01:11:44,593 --> 01:11:46,345
Sara, get the kids out
of here, okay?

1805
01:11:46,553 --> 01:11:49,139
Happily. I don't want them
watching this anyway.

1806
01:11:49,348 --> 01:11:50,933
Have fun, morons!

1807
01:11:51,475 --> 01:11:54,311
- Pancakes, bitches!
- Do not say "bitches."

1808
01:11:54,478 --> 01:11:55,479
Kids are gone. Let's go.

1809
01:11:55,562 --> 01:11:56,939
I'm not hitting a guy
dressed like Joseph.

1810
01:11:57,606 --> 01:11:58,941
The beard's off, Roger.

1811
01:11:59,108 --> 01:12:00,526
How many excuses you want to
pull out, man?

1812
01:12:00,609 --> 01:12:01,610
Oh, now it's on.

1813
01:12:01,777 --> 01:12:03,112
- You know what, Brad?
- Don!

1814
01:12:03,278 --> 01:12:04,488
Yes, I lied!

1815
01:12:04,571 --> 01:12:07,574
Because whenever there's
anything wrong in your life,

1816
01:12:07,783 --> 01:12:09,743
if it isn't roses
and rainbows,

1817
01:12:09,827 --> 01:12:11,370
you completely fall apart.

1818
01:12:11,537 --> 01:12:13,455
I thought
we had an honest relationship!

1819
01:12:13,622 --> 01:12:15,040
Oh, yeah. Brad, I bet you
never told him

1820
01:12:15,124 --> 01:12:16,959
about that procedure
you had last year, did you?

1821
01:12:17,126 --> 01:12:18,127
Oh, my God. What procedure?

1822
01:12:18,210 --> 01:12:20,796
It was nothing,
just some benign tissue.

1823
01:12:20,963 --> 01:12:23,716
How about that? You're both
a couple of lying sacks.

1824
01:12:23,882 --> 01:12:24,883
And, you!

1825
01:12:25,050 --> 01:12:26,135
From the minute you got here,

1826
01:12:26,218 --> 01:12:28,554
you've been nothing but mean
and sarcastic.

1827
01:12:28,721 --> 01:12:29,972
Well, you know what, Kurt?

1828
01:12:30,139 --> 01:12:31,640
- F you!
- Dad!

1829
01:12:31,807 --> 01:12:33,475
That's right. Forget you!

1830
01:12:33,642 --> 01:12:35,978
Attaboy, swami.
Throwing down F words.

1831
01:12:36,145 --> 01:12:38,022
Not the F word, but an F word,
and that's a good start.

1832
01:12:38,105 --> 01:12:39,648
Now, come on, give me
the finger, big boy. Come on.

1833
01:12:39,732 --> 01:12:41,400
- Come on.
- Hey! Hey!

1834
01:12:41,483 --> 01:12:43,318
Are we gonna still fight
or what?

1835
01:12:43,485 --> 01:12:45,696
Roger brings up a good point.
Let's get the momentum back.

1836
01:12:45,863 --> 01:12:48,157
Come on, Roger.
Get some! Let's get in there!

1837
01:12:48,323 --> 01:12:50,576
- Come on!
- No, no, no, no, no!

1838
01:12:50,743 --> 01:12:52,953
If you lay one hand
on each other,

1839
01:12:53,037 --> 01:12:54,413
whether the kids are here
or not,

1840
01:12:54,580 --> 01:12:56,749
it will
negatively impact them.

1841
01:12:57,332 --> 01:12:59,668
All right. I'm not gonna
lay a hand on him.

1842
01:13:01,587 --> 01:13:02,921
What are you doing?

1843
01:13:03,088 --> 01:13:05,674
Oh. Oh, I see.
Yeah, yeah. Snowball fight.

1844
01:13:05,841 --> 01:13:08,218
I've got some Nerf guns
in the back of my car.

1845
01:13:08,302 --> 01:13:09,595
Want me to get them?

1846
01:13:09,762 --> 01:13:11,930
I pitched triple-A for
the Red Sox in their

1847
01:13:12,014 --> 01:13:13,265
farm system, Roger
Don't say I didn't warn you.

1848
01:13:13,432 --> 01:13:15,184
Take your best shot.

1849
01:13:19,438 --> 01:13:20,522
Dad!

1850
01:13:20,856 --> 01:13:22,274
Don, I'm sorry!

1851
01:13:23,650 --> 01:13:24,985
That sucks.

1852
01:13:25,444 --> 01:13:28,113
- I'm so sorry.
- Oh, no, no, it was all right.

1853
01:13:30,157 --> 01:13:31,825
Hey, no fair.
That's an ice ball.

1854
01:13:31,992 --> 01:13:32,993
You bet it is.

1855
01:13:33,077 --> 01:13:34,953
You know, you throw that
and we are no longer co-dads.

1856
01:13:35,079 --> 01:13:36,455
Oh, I'm way ahead of you,
dickhead.

1857
01:13:36,538 --> 01:13:37,539
You know, from now on,

1858
01:13:37,623 --> 01:13:38,749
we'll just act like
a normal blended family

1859
01:13:38,832 --> 01:13:40,000
with me hating your guts.

1860
01:13:40,084 --> 01:13:41,085
The kids will never know,

1861
01:13:41,168 --> 01:13:42,419
because I'm
too good of a dad to

1862
01:13:42,503 --> 01:13:44,213
ever throw their stepfather
under the bus.

1863
01:13:44,379 --> 01:13:45,756
But that's right where
you're gonna be, Brad.

1864
01:13:45,839 --> 01:13:47,674
Under my bus.

1865
01:13:47,841 --> 01:13:49,259
Well, guess what,
I'm gonna celebrate you

1866
01:13:49,343 --> 01:13:50,677
morning, noon and night

1867
01:13:50,844 --> 01:13:52,054
because
it's the right thing to do

1868
01:13:52,137 --> 01:13:53,180
in front of the kids.

1869
01:13:53,347 --> 01:13:55,182
But just know the way
I really feel about you

1870
01:13:55,265 --> 01:13:57,226
is you can suck a fart, Dusty.

1871
01:13:57,518 --> 01:14:00,187
A wet, greasy fart.

1872
01:14:02,773 --> 01:14:04,399
You gonna keep
pump-faking that thing

1873
01:14:04,483 --> 01:14:05,609
or you gonna take a shot,
Brad?

1874
01:14:05,692 --> 01:14:06,693
Huh?

1875
01:14:07,111 --> 01:14:10,114
What? What? Huh?

1876
01:14:10,447 --> 01:14:11,949
He's never played sports ever.

1877
01:14:12,032 --> 01:14:13,575
Maybe it's stuck to his hand.

1878
01:14:13,659 --> 01:14:15,077
Oh! Oh!

1879
01:14:16,078 --> 01:14:17,955
Huh? Huh?

1880
01:14:25,045 --> 01:14:26,463
That's what I thought.

1881
01:14:26,630 --> 01:14:28,006
You know what, Dusty,
you're not worth it.

1882
01:14:28,090 --> 01:14:29,216
Come on, Dad.

1883
01:14:29,383 --> 01:14:30,509
Good.

1884
01:14:30,717 --> 01:14:32,302
Psych.
You're totally worth it!

1885
01:14:33,720 --> 01:14:34,721
Dad!

1886
01:14:36,306 --> 01:14:38,976
- That was an ice ball.
- Treating your dad like that!

1887
01:14:39,143 --> 01:14:40,144
Dad.

1888
01:14:40,561 --> 01:14:42,563
Look, it was an accident.

1889
01:14:45,357 --> 01:14:46,525
Go ahead, Roger.

1890
01:14:46,984 --> 01:14:48,986
Brad was right the first time.

1891
01:14:49,653 --> 01:14:51,155
You're not worth it.

1892
01:14:53,198 --> 01:14:55,200
Dang! Right down my neck!

1893
01:14:55,409 --> 01:14:56,577
Don! Sorry! Sorry!

1894
01:14:57,911 --> 01:14:59,913
That guy's like
a snowball magnet.

1895
01:15:00,122 --> 01:15:02,457
You were right about
everything. You happy now?

1896
01:15:02,791 --> 01:15:04,543
Ah, Dusty,

1897
01:15:05,210 --> 01:15:07,045
I do like being right.

1898
01:15:11,717 --> 01:15:12,885
Hey, is that your baby
in there?

1899
01:15:12,968 --> 01:15:13,969
Griffy!

1900
01:15:15,345 --> 01:15:17,973
I know. I know, sweetie.
It's okay, it's okay.

1901
01:15:18,140 --> 01:15:19,808
I know, I know.

1902
01:15:20,100 --> 01:15:22,769
This was Dusty's idea.
I never wanted to do this.

1903
01:16:00,557 --> 01:16:02,559
Hey, Brad. That one's mine.

1904
01:16:03,644 --> 01:16:05,979
- Oh, is this bag yours?
- Yeah.

1905
01:16:11,652 --> 01:16:13,362
Sara? Sara!

1906
01:16:35,342 --> 01:16:36,802
- Oh, my gosh.
- Ew.

1907
01:16:36,885 --> 01:16:38,679
What is going on here?

1908
01:16:43,433 --> 01:16:44,434
What's happening, Officer?

1909
01:16:44,518 --> 01:16:46,687
Avalanche hit
the highway up ahead.

1910
01:16:46,853 --> 01:16:48,522
It's gonna take
a few hours to clear it,

1911
01:16:48,605 --> 01:16:50,274
so follow the traffic back
into town, all right?

1912
01:16:51,108 --> 01:16:53,610
What caused the avalanche?
Was it all the snow?

1913
01:16:53,777 --> 01:16:54,987
Yeah, I'm pretty sure

1914
01:16:55,070 --> 01:16:56,947
snow had something to do
with the avalanche.

1915
01:16:57,114 --> 01:16:58,865
Keep it moving!

1916
01:17:03,203 --> 01:17:06,373
Well, I guess we could stop
and have lunch to kill time.

1917
01:17:06,540 --> 01:17:08,208
On Christmas Day?

1918
01:17:08,625 --> 01:17:11,378
- What's gonna be open?
- I don't know.

1919
01:17:17,676 --> 01:17:19,177
Oh, look at that!

1920
01:17:20,345 --> 01:17:21,888
Looks like everyone had
the same idea.

1921
01:17:34,651 --> 01:17:37,195
Oh, no. Everything's sold out.

1922
01:17:37,487 --> 01:17:38,613
Well, I guess we could see
<i>Missile Tow.</i>

1923
01:17:38,697 --> 01:17:39,740
What's that about?

1924
01:17:39,906 --> 01:17:40,991
It's Liam Neeson.

1925
01:17:41,158 --> 01:17:42,409
He's a tow truck driver

1926
01:17:42,492 --> 01:17:43,744
who's on his way home
for Christmas

1927
01:17:43,827 --> 01:17:44,911
with his kids and

1928
01:17:45,078 --> 01:17:46,496
happens along
some terrorists

1929
01:17:46,580 --> 01:17:48,290
who've hijacked a mobile ICBM.

1930
01:17:48,457 --> 01:17:49,541
So he hooks it to his rig

1931
01:17:49,624 --> 01:17:51,460
and has to get it to NORAD
before Christmas morning.

1932
01:17:51,626 --> 01:17:53,128
I hear it's really good!

1933
01:17:53,295 --> 01:17:55,630
I don't know, Brad,
it's PG-13.

1934
01:17:55,797 --> 01:17:58,592
I don't really care
for the salty language.

1935
01:17:58,759 --> 01:17:59,968
Well, it has cute little kids
in it.

1936
01:18:00,052 --> 01:18:01,053
I mean, how dirty can it be?

1937
01:18:01,261 --> 01:18:02,304
Besides, you love Liam Neeson.

1938
01:18:02,387 --> 01:18:03,388
I do.

1939
01:18:03,555 --> 01:18:05,057
- Let's just give it a shot.
- Yes!

1940
01:18:05,223 --> 01:18:06,808
Looks very heroic.

1941
01:18:06,892 --> 01:18:09,019
- I'll say that much.
- I mean, really. Man!

1942
01:18:11,355 --> 01:18:13,732
The front row?
I don't know, Brad.

1943
01:18:13,899 --> 01:18:15,150
- What about the...
- Dad, please stop!

1944
01:18:15,317 --> 01:18:16,526
It's gonna strain your eyes.

1945
01:18:16,610 --> 01:18:17,986
We don't have a choice,
all right?

1946
01:18:19,821 --> 01:18:21,490
Look, it's Mom and Brad!

1947
01:18:23,742 --> 01:18:25,911
<i>Santa's got
a present for you bastards.</i>

1948
01:18:35,253 --> 01:18:37,339
<i>You're impounded, asshole.</i>

1949
01:18:38,090 --> 01:18:40,175
<i>- You did it, Daddy!</i>
<i>- You killed them all.</i>

1950
01:18:40,509 --> 01:18:43,261
<i>No, kids.
We did it. We killed them all.</i>

1951
01:18:43,595 --> 01:18:44,930
<i>Together.</i>

1952
01:18:45,097 --> 01:18:46,515
<i>We love you, Daddy.</i>

1953
01:18:46,848 --> 01:18:48,433
<i>I love you, too.</i>

1954
01:18:48,892 --> 01:18:51,728
<i>The only thing that matters
to me in this crazy world</i>

1955
01:18:52,145 --> 01:18:53,563
<i>is you kids.</i>

1956
01:18:54,564 --> 01:18:56,566
<i>And I'm sorry
your holiday was ruined</i>

1957
01:18:56,650 --> 01:18:58,652
<i>by those godless mother...</i>

1958
01:19:05,409 --> 01:19:06,493
Sorry, folks.

1959
01:19:06,576 --> 01:19:08,245
Looks like we're having
a bit of a power outage.

1960
01:19:08,537 --> 01:19:10,497
Uh, we don't know when the
power's gonna come back on,

1961
01:19:10,664 --> 01:19:11,957
so you guys are all welcome

1962
01:19:12,040 --> 01:19:13,208
to stay in here
or in the lobby.

1963
01:19:13,375 --> 01:19:14,584
The DOT wants everybody

1964
01:19:14,668 --> 01:19:16,044
to stay inside
and off the roads,

1965
01:19:16,128 --> 01:19:17,379
so we might be in here
for a while.

1966
01:19:20,048 --> 01:19:22,050
You know, I bet this is
because of the snow, too.

1967
01:19:22,384 --> 01:19:24,219
Gee, Dad, you think so?

1968
01:19:50,370 --> 01:19:51,788
I need to use the gent's.

1969
01:19:51,872 --> 01:19:53,373
Brad, do you need to
go tee-tee?

1970
01:19:53,540 --> 01:19:55,000
Dad, don't say that in public!

1971
01:19:55,083 --> 01:19:56,126
- Just go.
- All right.

1972
01:19:58,628 --> 01:20:00,297
Is he still looking at me?

1973
01:20:01,298 --> 01:20:02,299
Yes.

1974
01:20:02,466 --> 01:20:05,135
Is he doing that one look that
he does? You know, like...

1975
01:20:07,012 --> 01:20:08,889
- Is he doing that look?
- Yeah.

1976
01:20:09,222 --> 01:20:11,349
Where he doesn't blink? Yeah.

1977
01:20:12,726 --> 01:20:13,727
Yep.

1978
01:20:14,478 --> 01:20:15,729
You know,

1979
01:20:15,979 --> 01:20:17,022
when I said that

1980
01:20:17,105 --> 01:20:18,773
Brad was turning you into
something that you're not?

1981
01:20:19,858 --> 01:20:22,444
Maybe, you know,
what I really meant to say

1982
01:20:22,777 --> 01:20:24,112
was that

1983
01:20:24,779 --> 01:20:27,199
Brad's turning you
into something that I'm not,

1984
01:20:27,574 --> 01:20:28,825
a good dad.

1985
01:20:30,535 --> 01:20:32,245
No? No,
that didn't do it for you?

1986
01:20:32,329 --> 01:20:33,371
Come on.
I thought it was pretty good.

1987
01:20:33,538 --> 01:20:35,457
That whole speech was
in the movie we just saw.

1988
01:20:35,624 --> 01:20:36,875
- Was it?
- Yeah. Word for word.

1989
01:20:36,958 --> 01:20:38,043
Dramatic pauses and all.

1990
01:20:38,210 --> 01:20:39,586
Liam Neeson just said that.

1991
01:20:39,669 --> 01:20:41,713
Oh, it must've been
in my subconscious.

1992
01:20:42,005 --> 01:20:43,089
I'm gonna go drain the lizard.

1993
01:20:43,173 --> 01:20:44,174
Yeah. Yeah.

1994
01:20:49,304 --> 01:20:51,806
Whoa!
That is a very impressive

1995
01:20:51,973 --> 01:20:55,393
watch. Is that a Rolex?
Mine's a Casio.

1996
01:21:04,361 --> 01:21:06,279
You know what, Kurt?

1997
01:21:06,446 --> 01:21:07,447
When we first met,

1998
01:21:07,531 --> 01:21:10,116
I was so excited about
our being co-grandpas.

1999
01:21:10,450 --> 01:21:13,537
And now everybody's miserable!
And my son won't forgive me.

2000
01:21:14,871 --> 01:21:17,040
You know what you and Brad
really need?

2001
01:21:17,207 --> 01:21:18,542
Oh, no.

2002
01:21:18,959 --> 01:21:21,628
I'm not taking any advice
from the likes of you.

2003
01:21:21,711 --> 01:21:22,796
No, thank you.

2004
01:21:26,383 --> 01:21:27,884
Okay, what do we need?

2005
01:21:31,221 --> 01:21:33,223
- Hey! Adrianna's here!
- Megan!

2006
01:21:33,390 --> 01:21:34,432
Hi!

2007
01:21:34,516 --> 01:21:37,102
- I can't shake this guy.
- I can't shake this guy.

2008
01:21:37,269 --> 01:21:38,853
- You guys got stuck here, too?
- Yeah.

2009
01:21:39,020 --> 01:21:41,773
And, Dylan, look who else
got stuck. Your girlfriend!

2010
01:21:42,607 --> 01:21:43,775
We should
put her under the mistletoe.

2011
01:21:43,858 --> 01:21:44,859
Yeah!

2012
01:21:45,068 --> 01:21:46,903
- Come on, stay under.
- Stay.

2013
01:21:50,031 --> 01:21:52,033
You like that girl, don't you?

2014
01:21:53,159 --> 01:21:54,202
Hmm.

2015
01:21:54,286 --> 01:21:55,287
Well,

2016
01:21:55,453 --> 01:21:57,872
who knocked down a pin
all by himself?

2017
01:21:58,707 --> 01:22:00,709
- I did?
- Damn right, you did.

2018
01:22:00,875 --> 01:22:02,877
Now go in there
and pick up that spare.

2019
01:22:03,044 --> 01:22:05,213
Here she is, Dylan!

2020
01:22:05,880 --> 01:22:07,632
It just doesn't seem right.

2021
01:22:09,426 --> 01:22:10,427
Brad?

2022
01:22:10,677 --> 01:22:12,762
Dad, I really don't want
to dis...

2023
01:22:12,971 --> 01:22:14,639
Jeez.

2024
01:22:14,723 --> 01:22:17,642
We're gonna settle this
physically, like men!

2025
01:22:17,809 --> 01:22:19,978
And when it's all over, we're
gonna feel a whole lot better.

2026
01:22:20,145 --> 01:22:22,147
At least somebody's
taking my advice today.

2027
01:22:22,314 --> 01:22:23,857
Cut it out! This is
child abuse! Honey, help me!

2028
01:22:23,940 --> 01:22:25,567
Don't be such a snowflake.
Fight back!

2029
01:22:25,650 --> 01:22:26,651
Hey, guys,
come on, knock it off.

2030
01:22:26,735 --> 01:22:27,736
You're making a scene,
all right?

2031
01:22:27,902 --> 01:22:29,070
Yeah, Don, lean on him!

2032
01:22:29,237 --> 01:22:31,698
Engage me, son,
for the sake of our male bond.

2033
01:22:34,075 --> 01:22:35,577
No, wait, wait, look. Look!

2034
01:22:40,457 --> 01:22:41,791
What's he doing?

2035
01:22:47,964 --> 01:22:49,799
Oh, my God. He's going in
for his first kiss.

2036
01:22:49,966 --> 01:22:51,509
Look, she's standing
under the mistletoe.

2037
01:22:51,593 --> 01:22:52,969
Oh, my God. Where's my phone?
Where my phone?

2038
01:22:53,303 --> 01:22:54,638
Oh, my God,
where's your phone?

2039
01:22:54,721 --> 01:22:55,972
Brad, where's your phone!

2040
01:22:56,139 --> 01:22:57,557
Okay, it's right here.
Right here. Yeah. Yeah.

2041
01:22:59,517 --> 01:23:01,686
Look how brave he is.
She's all yours, buddy.

2042
01:23:02,854 --> 01:23:03,855
Unless she's got a boyfriend.

2043
01:23:03,938 --> 01:23:05,023
In that case, there's always
the Friend Zone.

2044
01:23:05,106 --> 01:23:06,316
No, there's nothing wrong
with the Friend Zone.

2045
01:23:06,399 --> 01:23:07,567
Guys, he's not going
in the Friend Zone, okay?

2046
01:23:07,734 --> 01:23:08,902
Look at that smile.
She likes him.

2047
01:23:08,985 --> 01:23:10,570
Yeah, she wants a kiss.

2048
01:23:37,639 --> 01:23:39,140
My God, he kissed his sister!

2049
01:23:39,307 --> 01:23:41,476
Congratulations,
you lucky gal.

2050
01:23:42,477 --> 01:23:44,896
I did it, El Padre!
I kissed the girl I like!

2051
01:23:45,063 --> 01:23:47,732
Yeah! Attaboy!

2052
01:23:48,066 --> 01:23:51,152
Whoa! Did you just kiss
your sister? You sick kid!

2053
01:23:51,319 --> 01:23:52,404
Stepsister.

2054
01:23:52,654 --> 01:23:54,364
I mean, still not okay,
I know that.

2055
01:23:54,447 --> 01:23:56,074
What? No, no, wait, he's just
a little confused, all right?

2056
01:23:56,157 --> 01:23:57,909
It's no surprise when you look
at who raised him.

2057
01:23:58,076 --> 01:23:59,828
Adrianna, come on.
We're going home.

2058
01:24:00,203 --> 01:24:02,205
Wait, wait, Roger, you can't
go out in that storm.

2059
01:24:02,372 --> 01:24:03,498
I was an alternate
for Season 3

2060
01:24:03,581 --> 01:24:04,624
<i>Ice Road Truckers.</i>

2061
01:24:04,791 --> 01:24:06,626
- I'll be fine.
- Oh.

2062
01:24:07,293 --> 01:24:08,628
That was their best season.

2063
01:24:09,421 --> 01:24:10,755
I got this.

2064
01:24:11,089 --> 01:24:12,674
Wait a minute.
Roger, hold up, man.

2065
01:24:12,841 --> 01:24:15,343
No. From now on, I don't want
you anywhere near my daughter.

2066
01:24:15,510 --> 01:24:17,178
I don't want anything to do
with any of you people!

2067
01:24:17,345 --> 01:24:18,346
Look, I never wanted to be

2068
01:24:18,430 --> 01:24:19,431
family with you,
either, Roger.

2069
01:24:19,514 --> 01:24:20,765
Just like Brad never wanted to
be family with me,

2070
01:24:20,849 --> 01:24:21,850
did you, Brad?

2071
01:24:22,016 --> 01:24:23,852
No. Not at all.
I hated your guts.

2072
01:24:24,018 --> 01:24:25,770
In fact, I still kind of do
right now.

2073
01:24:25,937 --> 01:24:27,188
Yeah. Me, too, Brad.

2074
01:24:27,355 --> 01:24:28,773
But we're all connected
by these kids.

2075
01:24:28,857 --> 01:24:29,899
No one's going anywhere.

2076
01:24:30,316 --> 01:24:32,235
- You gonna stop me?
- If I have to, yes.

2077
01:24:32,402 --> 01:24:34,446
Yeah, right. You couldn't stop
a clock, you weak tit.

2078
01:24:35,655 --> 01:24:37,240
The hammer.

2079
01:24:40,201 --> 01:24:41,536
You know what, Adrianna?

2080
01:24:42,036 --> 01:24:43,204
You're not gonna like this,
young lady,

2081
01:24:43,288 --> 01:24:45,039
but this is long overdue.

2082
01:24:48,543 --> 01:24:49,544
I love you.

2083
01:24:49,711 --> 01:24:50,712
Aww.

2084
01:24:51,379 --> 01:24:53,131
- That got me.
- Got me, too. Right here.

2085
01:24:53,298 --> 01:24:54,340
What the hell
did you just say?

2086
01:24:54,424 --> 01:24:55,967
You heard me. I said,
I love my stepdaughter!

2087
01:24:56,134 --> 01:24:58,553
And I meant it. I should've
said it a long time ago,

2088
01:24:58,720 --> 01:25:00,138
but I was afraid to
put myself out there

2089
01:25:00,221 --> 01:25:02,056
- and risk getting rejected.
- Aww.

2090
01:25:02,557 --> 01:25:03,600
Sweet.

2091
01:25:03,683 --> 01:25:05,018
You know what?

2092
01:25:05,643 --> 01:25:08,146
Adrianna, you're gonna spend
Christmas with your mom, okay?

2093
01:25:10,315 --> 01:25:11,983
You're not leaving us, Roger.

2094
01:25:12,484 --> 01:25:13,985
'Cause I love you, too.

2095
01:25:16,404 --> 01:25:18,406
- You take that back!
- Nope. I can't.

2096
01:25:18,573 --> 01:25:19,616
Can't take it back now.

2097
01:25:19,699 --> 01:25:21,493
Everybody heard it.
It's out there.

2098
01:25:21,659 --> 01:25:23,536
- Everybody hear it?
- Yeah.

2099
01:25:24,496 --> 01:25:26,122
You're her dad,
you made her who she is,

2100
01:25:26,206 --> 01:25:27,373
and despite her
currently harboring

2101
01:25:27,457 --> 01:25:29,000
a fair amount of resentment
towards me,

2102
01:25:29,167 --> 01:25:31,252
I love her,
so that means I love you, too.

2103
01:25:31,586 --> 01:25:33,379
And I've never been too good
about saying it,

2104
01:25:33,463 --> 01:25:34,923
but I'm gonna follow
Brad's example,

2105
01:25:35,089 --> 01:25:36,174
who I also love.

2106
01:25:36,341 --> 01:25:38,426
Now you're just saying things
to choke me up.

2107
01:25:38,593 --> 01:25:39,761
Brad! Cut it out.

2108
01:25:39,886 --> 01:25:41,846
- I'm trying.
- I'm a hot mess here.

2109
01:25:41,930 --> 01:25:42,931
Don, please!

2110
01:25:43,097 --> 01:25:44,182
You've got to understand,

2111
01:25:44,265 --> 01:25:45,517
when it comes out of nowhere
like that,

2112
01:25:45,600 --> 01:25:46,601
what do you expect?

2113
01:25:46,768 --> 01:25:47,977
- Stop!
- I'm stopping.

2114
01:25:48,061 --> 01:25:49,062
- I'm currently stopping.
- We're...

2115
01:25:49,229 --> 01:25:51,397
Yeah, guys. Cut it out,
you're embarrassing me.

2116
01:25:51,564 --> 01:25:52,690
I love you, Brad.

2117
01:25:53,066 --> 01:25:54,818
And I love Karen,
I love Sara,

2118
01:25:55,735 --> 01:25:57,403
and I love my kids.

2119
01:26:00,323 --> 01:26:01,574
I, uh,

2120
01:26:05,203 --> 01:26:06,538
I might need a little
more time with that one.

2121
01:26:06,621 --> 01:26:07,622
Sure, understood.

2122
01:26:07,789 --> 01:26:09,833
But we're making progress.
Maybe for your birthday.

2123
01:26:09,999 --> 01:26:11,000
Yeah.

2124
01:26:11,084 --> 01:26:12,126
You know. Unless
you want to say anything?

2125
01:26:12,877 --> 01:26:14,712
- Anything at all?
- Say it, Kurt.

2126
01:26:14,879 --> 01:26:16,714
- Now's the time.
- Just say it, Kurt.

2127
01:26:16,881 --> 01:26:17,882
You want to say anything?

2128
01:26:17,966 --> 01:26:19,217
It's not that bad.
Just say it.

2129
01:26:19,384 --> 01:26:21,261
- You can do it.
- Do it.

2130
01:26:22,303 --> 01:26:24,806
Nah, the birthday's
a good target. Good target.

2131
01:26:25,181 --> 01:26:27,100
All right, Roger,
what do you say?

2132
01:26:27,308 --> 01:26:29,811
It's not too late to spend
Christmas with your family.

2133
01:26:48,913 --> 01:26:51,499
<i>It's Christmastime</i>

2134
01:26:52,834 --> 01:26:56,170
<i>There's no need to
be afraid, Roger</i>

2135
01:26:57,380 --> 01:26:59,382
<i>At Christmastime</i>

2136
01:27:00,216 --> 01:27:03,219
<i>We let in light
and we banish shade</i>

2137
01:27:03,428 --> 01:27:05,430
Damn, that's my favorite song
of all time.

2138
01:27:05,597 --> 01:27:09,767
<i>And in our world of plenty</i>

2139
01:27:10,059 --> 01:27:13,563
<i>We can spread a smile of joy</i>

2140
01:27:14,230 --> 01:27:17,567
<i>Throw your arms around
the world</i>

2141
01:27:17,901 --> 01:27:19,235
<i>At Christmastime</i>

2142
01:27:22,447 --> 01:27:24,157
<i>But say a prayer</i>

2143
01:27:26,492 --> 01:27:28,912
<i>Pray for the other ones!</i>

2144
01:27:29,078 --> 01:27:31,080
I'll play this in August,
I don't even care.

2145
01:27:31,247 --> 01:27:32,916
<i>At Christmastime</i>

2146
01:27:33,249 --> 01:27:38,254
<i>It's hard,
but when you're having fun</i>

2147
01:27:38,838 --> 01:27:43,176
<i>There's a world
outside your window</i>

2148
01:27:43,760 --> 01:27:47,513
<i>It's a world of dread and fear</i>

2149
01:27:47,805 --> 01:27:51,976
<i>Where the only water
flowing is</i>

2150
01:27:52,310 --> 01:27:55,146
<i>The bitter sting of tears</i>

2151
01:27:56,230 --> 01:27:59,984
<i>And the Christmas bells
that ring there</i>

2152
01:28:00,318 --> 01:28:03,821
<i>Are the clanging chimes
of doom</i>

2153
01:28:04,155 --> 01:28:07,158
<i>Well, tonight thank God
it's them</i>

2154
01:28:07,992 --> 01:28:10,495
<i>Instead of you</i>

2155
01:28:11,287 --> 01:28:13,039
Yes! Fantastic!

2156
01:28:17,961 --> 01:28:19,545
He heard it!

2157
01:28:29,430 --> 01:28:30,765
Come on, Roger.

2158
01:28:31,975 --> 01:28:34,060
Look.
Yes, we're all stuck here,

2159
01:28:34,394 --> 01:28:36,145
but we're with
our loved ones.

2160
01:28:36,312 --> 01:28:38,314
I'm not. I came alone.

2161
01:28:38,481 --> 01:28:39,941
Oh. Okay, well,

2162
01:28:40,024 --> 01:28:41,275
he came to the movies alone
on Christmas,

2163
01:28:41,359 --> 01:28:42,485
and that's a little sad.

2164
01:28:42,652 --> 01:28:44,612
<i>That's a little sad!</i>

2165
01:28:45,655 --> 01:28:47,156
But you're not alone, sir.

2166
01:28:47,323 --> 01:28:48,324
I mean, think about it.

2167
01:28:48,408 --> 01:28:49,909
We come to the movies
all the time.

2168
01:28:50,493 --> 01:28:52,412
We sit with hundreds
of people.

2169
01:28:52,745 --> 01:28:55,999
And we laugh together,
we cry together,

2170
01:28:56,332 --> 01:28:58,501
but we never look
at each other, do we?

2171
01:28:58,751 --> 01:29:01,421
Brad, it's not a microphone,
it's a mallet. See?

2172
01:29:01,671 --> 01:29:03,673
- They can hear you.
- You can still hear me, right?

2173
01:29:03,756 --> 01:29:05,008
- Yeah.
- Yeah.

2174
01:29:05,174 --> 01:29:06,676
Take a look at each other.

2175
01:29:07,093 --> 01:29:08,177
- That's right.
- Hi.

2176
01:29:08,928 --> 01:29:11,597
Give a hug.
Give an embrace.

2177
01:29:11,931 --> 01:29:13,433
What we have here
are the makings

2178
01:29:13,516 --> 01:29:15,435
of a really great
Christmas party.

2179
01:29:15,727 --> 01:29:19,230
We have a Christmas tree.
We have music and snacks.

2180
01:29:19,480 --> 01:29:22,442
We have Christmas spirit.
We have mirth.

2181
01:29:22,650 --> 01:29:24,068
We have snow!

2182
01:29:24,152 --> 01:29:25,319
You know
who doesn't have snow?

2183
01:29:26,195 --> 01:29:28,364
I'll bet he knows who doesn't
have snow, don't you?

2184
01:29:30,992 --> 01:29:33,327
Yeah. Yeah, I know.

2185
01:29:33,953 --> 01:29:35,788
I know where there isn't snow.

2186
01:29:36,372 --> 01:29:39,876
<i>And there won't be snow
in Africa</i>

2187
01:29:40,501 --> 01:29:43,171
<i>This Christmastime!</i>

2188
01:29:45,256 --> 01:29:50,261
<i>Do they know
it's Christmastime at all?</i>

2189
01:29:53,222 --> 01:29:54,640
Merry Christmas!

2190
01:29:54,849 --> 01:29:56,267
Merry Christmas, folks!

2191
01:29:57,852 --> 01:30:01,647
<i>Feed the world</i>

2192
01:30:01,981 --> 01:30:05,735
<i>Let them know
it's Christmastime</i>

2193
01:30:06,069 --> 01:30:08,154
<i>Feed the world</i>

2194
01:30:08,237 --> 01:30:09,280
What?

2195
01:30:10,239 --> 01:30:12,742
<i>Let them know
it's Christmastime</i>

2196
01:30:12,909 --> 01:30:14,410
"Sara.

2197
01:30:15,078 --> 01:30:16,746
"Beautiful and smart.

2198
01:30:17,080 --> 01:30:19,415
"The mom that everyone loves"?

2199
01:30:20,041 --> 01:30:22,710
Oh, my God. She's basing
a character on me!

2200
01:30:59,747 --> 01:31:00,748
All right, guys.

2201
01:31:00,915 --> 01:31:02,166
We're not gonna see them again
till Easter,

2202
01:31:02,250 --> 01:31:03,835
so everybody say good-bye
to El Padre and Pop-Pop.

2203
01:31:04,001 --> 01:31:05,503
- Bye, Dylan.
- Good-bye, El Padre!

2204
01:31:05,795 --> 01:31:07,296
Hey, next time you want to
shoot a guy,

2205
01:31:07,380 --> 01:31:09,799
don't just wing him,
go for center mass, okay?

2206
01:31:10,133 --> 01:31:11,134
Good-bye, Adrianna.

2207
01:31:13,511 --> 01:31:15,346
I don't want you to go,
Pop-Pop!

2208
01:31:15,513 --> 01:31:16,681
- Oh, really?
- Yeah, really?

2209
01:31:16,848 --> 01:31:18,224
Oh, sure.
Of course, he gets a hug.

2210
01:31:18,391 --> 01:31:19,517
Maybe you can call me

2211
01:31:19,600 --> 01:31:20,977
and tell me more
Pop-Pop stories.

2212
01:31:21,144 --> 01:31:22,645
I would love to!

2213
01:31:22,812 --> 01:31:25,106
Oh. And I also signed you up
for SeniorMatch.com.

2214
01:31:25,314 --> 01:31:27,441
It's a dating website
for old people like you.

2215
01:31:27,608 --> 01:31:29,110
Thank you, sweetie.

2216
01:31:29,986 --> 01:31:31,779
Oh, honey,
it's your mom texting.

2217
01:31:31,863 --> 01:31:33,406
They're just getting off
the plane.

2218
01:31:33,573 --> 01:31:35,032
I'd better go
before they get here.

2219
01:31:35,116 --> 01:31:36,909
I don't want to
make anything awkward.

2220
01:31:37,160 --> 01:31:38,995
- Bye, Dad.
- Bye, big man.

2221
01:31:39,328 --> 01:31:41,831
- Love you.
- I love you, too, Brad.

2222
01:31:43,082 --> 01:31:45,084
Hey, well, yeah,
you have a good flight.

2223
01:31:58,639 --> 01:32:00,433
Yeah,
let's not get that going.

2224
01:32:00,600 --> 01:32:01,809
I agree. You've got to
start that younger.

2225
01:32:01,893 --> 01:32:02,977
We missed that window.

2226
01:32:03,144 --> 01:32:04,145
I really appreciate
the gesture.

2227
01:32:04,228 --> 01:32:05,479
You do? Oh, then okay.

2228
01:32:05,646 --> 01:32:07,481
- Hey. I'll see you, kid.
- See you soon, yeah.

2229
01:32:07,648 --> 01:32:08,733
Yeah, bye, kid.

2230
01:32:09,150 --> 01:32:11,485
- Are you coming, Pop-Pop?
- Come on, Captain!

2231
01:32:12,153 --> 01:32:13,154
Bye, Dad.

2232
01:32:14,113 --> 01:32:16,032
You know, Don,
I've been thinking.

2233
01:32:16,115 --> 01:32:17,450
You don't need a dating app.

2234
01:32:17,617 --> 01:32:19,785
What you need is a wingman.

2235
01:32:20,077 --> 01:32:21,412
I switched our flights
to Vegas.

2236
01:32:21,495 --> 01:32:23,497
New Year's at Caesar's,
fix you right up.

2237
01:32:23,664 --> 01:32:25,416
Oh, that sounds wonderful!

2238
01:32:25,833 --> 01:32:27,752
Where are
we connecting through?

2239
01:32:27,835 --> 01:32:29,170
Don't start with me, Pop-Pop.

2240
01:32:29,921 --> 01:32:31,923
Hey, Braddie.
Don't be nervous now.

2241
01:32:32,173 --> 01:32:33,299
You are the kindest,

2242
01:32:33,382 --> 01:32:35,760
most gentle
and honest guy I know.

2243
01:32:36,093 --> 01:32:38,512
And whoever your mother
brings down that escalator,

2244
01:32:38,679 --> 01:32:39,972
he's gonna love you,
you hear me?

2245
01:32:40,056 --> 01:32:41,349
Grandma!

2246
01:32:45,519 --> 01:32:47,021
Is that Sully?

2247
01:32:47,730 --> 01:32:48,898
Wait, wait, who?

2248
01:32:49,148 --> 01:32:50,566
Sully Sullenberger.

2249
01:32:50,650 --> 01:32:52,235
The guy who saved
155 passengers

2250
01:32:52,318 --> 01:32:53,486
on the miracle on the Hudson!

2251
01:32:53,653 --> 01:32:55,154
Clint Eastwood made
a frickin' movie about it.

2252
01:32:55,238 --> 01:32:56,906
Wait. We watched it at
your house, it was awesome!

2253
01:32:57,073 --> 01:32:58,241
Right.
Tom Hanks and Aaron Eckhart.

2254
01:32:58,324 --> 01:32:59,408
I really enjoyed it.

2255
01:32:59,575 --> 01:33:00,785
That guy is a national hero,

2256
01:33:00,868 --> 01:33:02,495
and he's gonna be
your stepdad.

2257
01:33:02,870 --> 01:33:03,955
Wow, amazing.

2258
01:33:04,121 --> 01:33:06,040
I bet you
he gets free flight vouchers.

2259
01:33:06,207 --> 01:33:07,208
And maybe get us
some vouchers!

2260
01:33:07,291 --> 01:33:08,292
Maybe.

2261
01:33:08,376 --> 01:33:11,462
Well, don't make him wait.
Go say hi. Go! Go!

2262
01:33:11,754 --> 01:33:12,755
Grandma!

2263
01:33:14,340 --> 01:33:16,342
You must be Brad.

2264
01:33:16,425 --> 01:33:17,426
Nope.

2265
01:33:17,593 --> 01:33:19,303
- No, Brad.
- You're not my dad!

2266
01:33:19,470 --> 01:33:20,638
Brad, no, that's a mistake!

2267
01:33:20,805 --> 01:33:22,640
I don't care
how many lives you saved!

2268
01:33:22,723 --> 01:33:25,101
You'll never replace him,
do you hear me?

2269
01:33:27,436 --> 01:33:29,313
Brad, he's so nice! Come back!

2270
01:33:29,480 --> 01:33:33,234
You only have one good story,
my father has a million!

2271
01:35:12,833 --> 01:35:14,627
<i>You're listening to
Jason Sinclair at the Panda,</i>

2272
01:35:14,710 --> 01:35:17,088
<i>and I've got a little holiday
recipe for you tonight.</i>

2273
01:35:17,171 --> 01:35:20,216
<i>Two cups of eggnog,
one serving of silk pajamas,</i>

2274
01:35:20,299 --> 01:35:22,718
<i>and a heaping helping
of a loved one.</i>

2275
01:35:22,802 --> 01:35:25,388
<i>And I'm gonna add
a pinch of smooth jazz</i>

2276
01:35:25,471 --> 01:35:26,806
<i>on the Panda.</i>

2277
01:35:26,972 --> 01:35:28,808
<i>And I have one question
for you.</i>

2278
01:35:28,891 --> 01:35:30,142
<i>Do you know what time it is?</i>

2279
01:35:30,226 --> 01:35:32,269
<i>It's Christmastime</i>

2280
01:35:33,979 --> 01:35:38,192
<i>There's no need to
be afraid, Roger</i>

2281
01:35:38,567 --> 01:35:44,907
<i>At Christmastime, we let in
light and we banish shade</i>

2282
01:35:46,492 --> 01:35:51,247
<i>And in our world of plenty</i>

2283
01:35:51,330 --> 01:35:55,334
<i>We can spread a smile of joy</i>

2284
01:35:55,584 --> 01:35:58,838
<i>Throw your arms around
the world</i>

2285
01:35:58,921 --> 01:36:01,340
<i>At Christmastime</i>

2286
01:36:03,509 --> 01:36:05,219
<i>But say a prayer</i>

2287
01:36:07,555 --> 01:36:09,974
<i>Pray for the other ones!</i>

2288
01:36:11,851 --> 01:36:13,519
<i>At Christmastime</i>

2289
01:36:13,853 --> 01:36:18,858
<i>It's hard,
but when you're having fun</i>

2290
01:36:20,192 --> 01:36:24,530
<i>There's a world
outside your window</i>

2291
01:36:25,114 --> 01:36:28,868
<i>It's a world of dread and fear</i>

2292
01:36:29,160 --> 01:36:33,330
<i>Where the only water
flowing is</i>

2293
01:36:33,664 --> 01:36:36,500
<i>The bitter sting of tears</i>

2294
01:36:37,585 --> 01:36:39,128
<i>And the Christmas bells</i>

2295
01:36:39,211 --> 01:36:41,338
<i>That ring there</i>

2296
01:36:41,672 --> 01:36:45,176
<i>Are the clanging chimes
of doom</i>

2297
01:36:45,509 --> 01:36:48,512
<i>Well, tonight thank God
it's them</i>

2298
01:36:49,346 --> 01:36:51,849
<i>Instead of you</i>

2299
01:36:53,934 --> 01:36:57,438
<i>And there won't be snow
in Africa</i>

2300
01:36:58,063 --> 01:37:00,733
<i>This Christmastime!</i>

2301
01:37:02,776 --> 01:37:07,740
<i>The greatest gift
they'll get this year is life</i>

2302
01:37:08,199 --> 01:37:10,701
<i>Life, life</i>

2303
01:37:10,784 --> 01:37:14,872
<i>Where nothing ever grows</i>

2304
01:37:14,955 --> 01:37:18,626
<i>No rain nor rivers flow</i>

2305
01:37:19,668 --> 01:37:24,590
<i>Do they know
it's Christmastime at all?</i>

2306
01:37:28,010 --> 01:37:29,678
<i>Here's to you</i>

2307
01:37:29,762 --> 01:37:32,223
<i>Raise a glass for everyone</i>

2308
01:37:32,306 --> 01:37:33,724
<i>Here's to them</i>

2309
01:37:33,807 --> 01:37:36,268
<i>Underneath that burning sun</i>

2310
01:37:36,352 --> 01:37:41,398
<i>Do they know
it's Christmastime at all?</i>

2311
01:37:57,331 --> 01:38:01,126
<i>Feed the world</i>

2312
01:38:01,460 --> 01:38:05,214
<i>Let them know
it's Christmastime</i>

2313
01:38:05,548 --> 01:38:09,718
<i>Feed the world</i>

2314
01:38:09,802 --> 01:38:13,847
<i>Let them know
it's Christmastime</i>

2315
01:38:13,931 --> 01:38:17,726
<i>Feed the world</i>

2316
01:38:18,060 --> 01:38:21,814
<i>Let them know
it's Christmastime</i>

2317
01:38:22,147 --> 01:38:26,402
<i>Feed the world</i>

2318
01:38:26,485 --> 01:38:30,531
<i>Let them know
it's Christmastime</i>

2319
01:38:30,614 --> 01:38:34,410
<i>Feed the world</i>

2320
01:38:34,743 --> 01:38:38,497
<i>Let them know
it's Christmastime</i>

2321
01:38:38,831 --> 01:38:42,960
<i>Feed the world</i>

2322
01:38:43,043 --> 01:38:47,840
<i>Let them know
it's Christmastime again</i>

2323
01:38:52,761 --> 01:38:55,431
You know. Last year, the folks
at St. Benedict's, they...

2324
01:38:55,681 --> 01:38:57,266
They had a...
A modern-dress Nativity.

2325
01:38:57,600 --> 01:38:58,726
Everybody hated it at first,

2326
01:38:58,809 --> 01:39:00,728
but you know
the folks at St. Benedict's,

2327
01:39:00,811 --> 01:39:02,271
they got back at 'em,
all right.

2328
01:39:02,521 --> 01:39:05,107
They won the prize
for most original.

2329
01:39:05,441 --> 01:39:08,611
Then, of course, you have
the Maplewood Christians.

2330
01:39:08,944 --> 01:39:11,030
They had a kind of
friendly competition

2331
01:39:11,113 --> 01:39:13,282
with the Nazarenes,

2332
01:39:14,283 --> 01:39:17,286
and took all their hay
last year.

2333
01:39:17,620 --> 01:39:19,455
Yeah, you just try
setting up

2334
01:39:20,623 --> 01:39:22,458
a Nativity without hay.

2335
01:39:22,791 --> 01:39:24,627
Merry Christmas, fellas!